Title: Performance Art? Authors: Nicole van Dam & Heathers Email: lone_jaguar@geocities.com & heathers@gtn.net Rating: NC-17 for shameless SMUT content Category: MSR, H Spoilers: Homage to our first fic, Carpe Felis Mortuus... Yeah, yeah, we're bastards. You don't have to have read Carpe 1 to get this. Only the vaguest of references is included. But if you read this one and like our style, check it out at http://heathers.webjump.com/CarpeFelisMortuus.htm and let us know what you think of them! Pssst! And if you're a fan already, be on the lookout for Carpe 2 in the not-so-distant future! Summary: Mulder and Scully delve into the world of Modern Art... Some might call that kinky Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully are the property of Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, and FOX network. Characters are used without permission. Don't sue, we just like to see them get a little action every now and again! Authors' Notes: This is just a mindless SMUT biscuit borne as an excuse to procrastinate on school work, Carpe 2 and numerous other Works In Progress... and it turned out pretty damn good. We thought we might include a brief definition of Performance Art for reference... Encyclopedia.com defines performance art as an "art form in which live performance is the essential feature of the artwork. With roots in Dada, it originated in the happenings of the 1960s. Performance art incorporates elements from the visual arts, dance, music, pantomime, drama, and other forms; stresses spontaneity, evanescence, and originality; and often exhibits a keen sense of absurdity, humor, or pathos." Feedback is gratefully accepted, sought after, and begged for. If you want more SMUT from us, show us how much you love it! On with the show... * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Performance Art? by Nicole van Dam & Heathers * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "Mulder..." Dana Scully craned her neck, trying to see what her partner was up to beyond the edge of the bed. His naked ass wiggled slightly as he rummaged around in the bottom drawer of the dresser. She leaned back on her elbows, crossing her ankles. Mulder mumbled to himself. "I know I put them in here somewhere." Scully scratched her bare stomach absently. "What are you doing?" Mulder looked over his shoulder as his nude lover. "I," he said, "am going to liven the night up a little." He waggled his eyebrows at her and returned his attention to the drawer. Dana groaned. "Mulder, how? I mean, you're not going to use one of those..." She trailed off as he smiled triumphantly at her. He lifted his hand and dangling from his finger was a shiny new pair of - "Handcuffs," he said. "Handcuffs?" she repeated uneasily. "You know... walk on the wild side?" "Can't we just have sex?" "Just have sex..." he said disapprovingly. "Gee that sounds... exciting." "It usually is," she smirked. "Yeah," he sighed, "but just once wouldn't it be more exciting if we did something UN-usual?" "Like what? Whips and chains? Silk scarves? Vibrators? Butt beads? Cock rings? Nipple clamps? Dildos? Ben Wa balls?" "Mulder sat down heavily by her feet. "Well... yeah." Scully crawled her way to the foot of the bed and rested her chin on his knee. "Tell you what," she said. "The next time something wild and unusual presents itself..." she took a deep breath. "I'll do it." A smile made its way across his face. "But," she added, trailing a finger up his thigh. "This time we just do it the old fashioned way?" Mulder grinned and climbed onto the bed. "Deal," he replied, placing a hand on her hip and flipping her over playfully. Planting his elbows at either side of her head, he leaned toward her and nuzzled her throat. Scully hummed and wrapped her legs around his waist, pushing herself up to him. He nipped at her chin and accepted her invitation by grinding his hips into hers. "Mmm... Mulder..." Arching from the bed, Dana tilted her head back allowing him the opportunity to feast on her neck. She groaned, tangling her fingers through his hair before being unceremoniously interrupted by the telephone. "Aaaaahh... shit," Scully groaned. Mulder reached over and grabbed the offending contraption off the nightstand. "Mulder," he growled into the receiver. Scully began nibbling her way down his neck as a stream of "uh huhs" and "yeahs" vibrated against her mouth. Her tongue dipped into the hollow of his throat as her hands smoothed over his chest, pausing to tweak his nipples and causing his voice to skip an octave in his one-sided conversation. Mulder slapped at her hands as they latched onto his erection. "Weeeeeeee'll be riiiiiiight theeeeeere," he squealed into the receiver and then threw it against the wall. Scully's hand tightened around his shaft. "And just where are we going?" "Ahhhh... the office," he said attempting to loosen her grip. "Skinner wants those reports." "You mean the ones I told you he wanted before you decided to leave early?" "Yep... those. C'mon, let's get going so we can enjoy the rest of the evening," he said clambering to his feet. "Go right ahead, I'll have no problem enjoying the rest of the evening all by myself." Scully lay back, caressing her body with her hands. "He wants your report too, y'know." "And you can give it to him. You know the password to my files," she smirked, stretching languidly. "If I have to go, so do you," he said grabbing her ankles and yanking her towards to foot of the bed. Scully screeched, instinctively grabbing the headboard effectively squelching her partner's attempt to drag her away. Turning to the side Mulder wrapped his arm around her ankles and attacked her feet with his nimble fingers. Scully screamed and bucked wildly, but did not loosen her grip on the wooden plank above her head. Realizing his plan of attack would no longer do, Mulder stepped onto the mattress. Hiking her legs up under his arms, he planted his heels deep into the mattress and leaned back. Scully's arms couldn't hold their combined weight for more than a few seconds and let go, sending Mulder hurling backwards. Thinking there was a chance in hell that he could right himself, the grip he had on her legs never faltered, meanwhile Dana frantically clawed at the sheets to keep from toppling over with him. Both of their best efforts in vain, Mulder careened into the hardwood floor like a derailed freight train, and Scully only managed to tear the sheets from the mattress before landing on her partner's chest like a ton of bricks. A muffled "Well that worked," came from beneath the pile of sheets. Mulder grunted as he attempted to extricate himself from beneath his partner. "Alright, up, up and away, Scully," Mulder nudged her, but again she refused to budge. "Sculleeeeee," he whined, "get oooooooff! Alright... you leave me no choice." Mulder's hand fished through the ocean of sheets until he found what he was searching for. Scully screamed, loud and long, thrashing about until she had made her way out of the maze of bedclothes that still covered her partner. She jumped to her feet clutching her chest with both hands as if she were applying pressure to a bleeding bullet wound. Mulder untangled himself from the web of sheets left in her wake and surfaced in time to see the look she had aimed at him. "What?" he asked innocently. "Were you trying to twist it off?" "I barely touched you! What's your problem?" he said hopping to his feet. "You fucker," she snarled, sizing him up. Her eyes sank below his waist, and her mood lightened instantly. "Put that away before you put someone's eye out," she said before dissolving into a fit of giggles, her finger pointed at the offending tool. Mulder looked down at the makeshift tent the sheet had made over his erection. With a dramatic gesture he yanked the sheet to reveal his bobbing hard on, his movements mimicking a master magician commanding applause. Scully golf clapped. "For your next trick, try putting on those jeans." Taking the challenge, Mulder strutted over to his discarded pants. He slipped on his boxers carefully before pulling the jeans on over them, leaving the zipper undone. He raised his arms in triumph. "Oh no, no, no... zip them up, cowboy." Mulder smirked and scrupulously watched as the zipper's teeth grew closer and closer to his most fragile body part. Just as they were about to engulf him, the offending appendage sprang from the confines of his boxers and proudly danced for his audience. "Try to make that disappear, Copperfield," Scully said, laughing at his apparent misfortune. Mulder furrowed his brow and concentrated for a few moments. After a minute of silence, he opened his eyes and looked at his partner. "The dead cats aren't working." "They never do," she smirked. "Well, heeeeelp me!" he demanded. "You asked for it... Think about your mother." "What's that supposed to accomplish?" "Think about her naked..." "Oh god, make it stop!" "Think about her having sex..." "Okay, okay, okay... enough!" Scully looked down and shook a finger at his crotch. "Not according to him. Now think about dear old mom having wild circus sex with ... SKINNER!" Mulder shrieked and ran from the room. Scully flopped onto the bare mattress, pleased with her accomplishment. A few moments later he returned, throwing clothes in her direction. Dana sat up and cocked her head at his groin. "Locked and loaded?" "Snug as a bug in a rug, now hurry up and get dressed," he said patting his zipper. She sorted through the pile of clothes beside her and looked up. "There's no underwear here. I'm not leaving without underwear." Mulder turned silently and walked into the hallway. He returned a moment later with the panties she had been wearing earlier that day, exposing the creamy center to her. "I didn't think you wanted to wear these again." Making a face she agreed silently. "I guess I'll be going commando." * * * "Mulder, where are you going?" Fox slowed the car to a stop in front of the FBI Headquarters and looked at his partner. "I'm parking," he stated. Scully looked out the window. "You're *double* parking," she told him. "We 're gonna get towed." "No we're not," he said, taking off his seatbelt. "We're going in there for all of ten minutes; we'll be out in no time." Sighing in defeat, Dana undid her seatbelt and followed him up the steps of the building. It was pretty late for the working world and the headquarters was deserted save for a few souls doing overtime. Mulder and Scully navigated their way through the sea of empty desks to the elevators. "We're gonna get towed, you know," Scully said as the car started moving. "We are not, stop trying to jinx us." "Us?" she repeated. "It's your car, Mulder, not mine." The elevator doors opened. "Then stop trying to jinx me," he said, walking down the hall to their office. Each agent went to their own computer and retrieved the files they needed to award them a night off. They printed the documents out in silence and organized themselves before they headed up to the Assistant Director's floor. * * * Mulder walked slightly ahead of Scully as they approached the front doors. Reaching a hand out, he opened the door for her and smiled. "See? I told you it'd be fine." Dana stepped through the open door and stopped in her tracks, smirking. "Where's your car, smart guy?" Pushing past her, Mulder ran down a few steps and looked frantically for his car. His shoulders slumped slightly as the realization set in. "I don't believe it," he mumbled to himself. He turned his head as he felt a light pat on his shoulder. "Guess you'll be listening to the little woman more, huh?" Scully said, walking past him with a chuckle. "Come on... Let's get a cab." * * * An hour later Scully was leaning against the wall of the impound lot's office, watching Mulder try to barter for the return of his car. She sighed and rubbed her eyes. Scully knew he was losing and her suspicions were confirmed when Mulder came walking toward her with that look in his eye. "Scully, do you have two hundred bucks?" He asked it sincerely and she really gave him credit for having the balls to do so. Still, she looked at him like he was completely off his rocker. A look that she handed him quite regularly, actually. Without a word, Scully pushed herself from the wall and walked past Mulder and toward the greasy mechanic behind the counter. "Give me your credit card, Mulder." Her partner patted his pockets down. "All I've got is American Express and I left home without it." "Doesn't matter," the mechanic grumbled. "We don't take it anyway." Scully sighed and withdrew a card out of the inside pocket of her jacket. The man behind the counter was nearly blinded by the brilliance of the Visa Platinum card between her fingers. "You take this, don't you?" she asked, unimpressed by the entire situation. The mechanic jumped to his feet. "Yes Ma'am!" he exclaimed, coming around the counter. He placed a hand on her shoulder until she raised an eyebrow at it. It was quickly withdrawn as he directed her attention to the window overlooking the lot behind the office. "Which one is yours?" Mulder surveyed the lot and pointed his car out. "That one," he said. The man turned to Scully, ignoring her partner. "That's the one," she told him. He looked out at the car in question and back to her. "Are you sure you want that one?" he asked. Dana rolled her eyes and showed him the Visa again. "Just swipe the damn card, will you?" The mechanic snatched the card out of her hand and rushed behind the counter. He looked up from the keyboard for a moment. "Can I interest you in a complimentary pine-scented car freshener?" "No, thanks." Scully signed the sheet of paper the man slid in front of her and grabbed the keys to Mulder's car. She slipped her credit card back into her jacket and exited the office as fast as she could. * * * The car was silent for a good part of the ride until Scully remembered her promise. "So Mulder," she started, "how about I forget about the two hundred dollars and you forget about the whole unusual sex thing?" Mulder laughed. "Oh no," he replied. "I like having you owe me sex. And if it costs me two hundred bucks, then so be it." Scully sighed, defeated in the passenger seat of his car. The sudden twist of the steering wheel sent the redhead into the window. "Mulder, what the hell are you doing?" He smiled cryptically as he stopped the car in a small parking lot. "A wild and unusual situation just presented itself." Dana looked around them, unimpressed. "This is a park. We've done the park thing before." "Ah, but this isn't just any park," he told her, getting out of the car. "She followed in suit and straightened her skirt out as Mulder locked the doors. "So what kind of park is it?" she asked. Her partner grinned as he took a blanket out from the trunk and draped it over his arm. "It's a special park." Taking her hand in his own they started into the blackened park. They walked for what seemed like an hour. Well, probably more like ten minutes but the trees, mud, and thorny bushes made it seem like more. When they finally reached the park's main source of light, there were no people in sight, and more importantly, no police. It was essentially, the perfect place. "A band shell?" Scully asked, not quite believing it herself. "It's perfect, isn't it?" he said, hopping up the four feet to the elevated stage. He put the blanket beside him and reached a hand out to her. "Whaddiya say?" "Hmm..." she tapped her finger to her lips, deep in thought. "I say it's cold, it's dirty, it smells like teenage boys, and you're crazy," she said nodding in agreement with herself. "Tough," he said yanking on her hand. "Scully, meet Opportunity, he's knockin' on your door." Mulder pulled harder and her body lurched forward. She had no other choice than to comply with its forward motion. "Ow!" she yelped as he towed her onto the stage. Her voice reverberated throughout the park causing them both to take note. "With acoustics this good, we can't go wrong," he smiled, his chest puffed out in triumph. "Don't get ahead of yourself, Don Juan." "C'mon, Scully..." Turning around, Mulder spread the blanket out, making a soft blue oasis on the concrete stage. He backed up onto it, facing his partner and the park behind her. Scully watched him with an uneasy smirk. "I'm not sure about this, Mulder," she said. "There's no one here, Scully," he assured her. He knew she was a little uncomfortable and unsure about the whole thing. It was true, they had had sex in a park once, but when they did it, they were in complete darkness. There had even been a few people around in the park, but they were safely hidden away from peering eyes. This time, they were in the limelight, so to speak. And he understood why she would be a little apprehensive about it. He supposed the only way to make her comfortable with it, was to start off himself. And even if it didn't ease her apprehensions, it'd at least make her forget about them. Keeping his eyes firmly locked with his partner's, Mulder reached down to his waist. In one swift motion, he undid the button and unzipped his jeans. Scully sucked in a breath as he pulled himself out of his boxers, partially erect. She couldn't believe he was actually going to do this right in front of her; in front of the world. He wrapped his fingers around his burgeoning erection and with a quick smirk, Mulder stroked himself long and slow. "Mulder..." Scully whispered. She swallowed hard and dropped to her knees in front of him, but never touched him. The complete apathy for the public that her partner displayed was enough of a magnet. Not to mention that she always loved to watch him masturbate. "Think about it, Scully," he replied softly, tightening his hand around the head of his penis. He dragged his palm back down the shaft and tilted his head back despite himself. Hearing his partner suck in another breath, he raised his head and looked at her intensely. "Imagine how we would sound in here." Dana let her eyes fall to his lap and to his hand caressing the full erection there. Taking a deep breath, Scully spoke. "Faster," she said. Mulder looked up at her in shock at first, but then he smiled and did as he was told. He began to pump himself with a sure rhythm. The surge of pleasure that shot to his groin made his hips jerk slightly and his head fell back. "Ohhh yeah," he groaned. Dana licked her lips at the sight before her. She wasn't sure why she was so turned on, whether it was the fact he was masturbating fully clothed, whether he was doing so in public, whether he was doing it for her, or a combination of the three, it was a mystery. A mystery she didn't really care about solving at the moment. She swallowed again, watching Mulder's fingers tighten around his erection as he stroked himself. He groaned again and she shifted, feeling her wetness spill down her thighs. "Faster," she whispered again, moving a little closer to him. Mulder did as requested and felt his hips jump into his hand to speed it up even more. "Ah god, Scully," he moaned. "Yeaah... oh yeah..." He moved his left hand a little further back to get better leverage. Dana closed her eyes, listening to the echoed moans amplified by the curve of the band shell. She wanted to touch herself so badly, but forced herself to wait, wanting to watch her partner for a little longer. When she opened her eyes, she nearly gave in. Mulder's hips pumped himself through his hand as a sheen of sweat began to form over his arms and down his neck. Having had enough with being the voyeur, Scully got to her feet and walked toward him. Fox looked up at her with a question in his eyes. He stopped his hand and frowned slightly at her. Dana reached for the hem of her skirt and lifted it to her waist. "Don't stop," she told him as she straddled his shoulders. Mulder wasted no time in craning his neck and burying his face between her legs. Scully cried out at the initial sensation of his mouth on her, clutching at his hair with her free hand. "Oh god, Mulder..." She ground her hips into him and looked behind her to see her partner's hand almost a blur in his lap. Fox moaned into her and shifted slightly, bringing his left hand to her ass, holding her to him. His right hand worked his erection roughly as Scully's moans reverberated around them. "Oh god, yeah.... yeah Mulder..." She looked down at his head bobbing back and forth in time to the surges of pleasure through her body. When he took her clit between his lips, her knees nearly buckled. The howl that came from her throat could have been heard throughout the entire park. In fact... It was. But neither Mulder nor Scully could have had the ability to realize that and instead of stopping and going for cover, Mulder looked up at the ecstasy he was causing. "God, you look good, Scully," he said. Her face contorted slightly. "Don't stop, Mulder," she said. "Oh god, don't stop..." Recognizing the urgency in her voice, Fox dove into her again, wrapping his lips around her clit. He suckled at her, watching her arch above him. Releasing the grip his right hand had held for so long, Mulder took her ass in his both of his hands, holding her tight against his mouth. "Oh god... oh yeah..." His tongue flicked over rapidly, bringing her closer and closer to the ultimate goal. He laved at her with no mercy, sucking her one second and teasing her the next. He held no rhythm, no steady cadence and it was quickly driving her insane. "Mulder, please... oh god... make me come..." True to her request, Mulder latched onto her clit and sucked her fast and hard. It didn't take more than a few seconds for her muscles to seize up. "Mulderrr! Aaaaah goooooooood... yeeaaah..." He held her steady and sucked at her until she went limp in his hands. Giving her a parting lick, Mulder placed both hands on his partner's hips. She looked down at him, but quickly caught on and kneeled over his still raging erection. Without wasting much time, Mulder guided himself to Scully as she sank down onto him. "Aaahhh, yeah..." Mulder moaned. Scully looked at him and flashed him a lazy smile before lifting herself up a few inches and sinking back down onto him. Mulder's hips bucked upward, meeting her languid movements prematurely. "Down boy," she whispered, twining her fingers through his sweaty hair. A frustrated growl escaped her partner's lips before claiming her bare neck with his teeth. Scully gasped as his teeth clamped down on her jugular, her pulse beating fast against his tongue. She froze, like prey to his predatory impulse. Realizing the moment to its fullest potential, Mulder pumped into her, his hips lost in the flurry of sensations. Releasing her neck, Mulder dipped his head to her chest, tugging at her hard nipples through the fabric of her blouse. Dana's hands moved down his back, sliding beneath the flannel of his boxers. Her nails dug into his ass as it pumped frantically into her. Grabbing fistfuls of cloth, Mulder ripped open her delicate blouse to reveal the two creamy mounds his mouth sought so feverishly. Scully arched backward, offering her breasts to him as a veritable buffet. Taking the invitation, her partner wrenched the lacy bra out of the way and latched onto the little nub that infused them both with pleasure. "Mulderrrrrrr..." she purred. His tongue flicked over her in short bursts, pausing only to suck her into his mouth. She was instantly taken back ten minutes when the very same tongue had lavished her tender clit in a similar manner. A hot flash surged between the redhead's thighs and her hips began bucking against his. With every thrust she was closer to that ever illusive cliff for the second time that evening. Scully ground down against him, clenching him deep inside of her body. Pressing his face into her breast, Mulder moaned. The sensation of his moans vibrating against her nipple sent Dana groaning right along with him. Their embrace tightened as his strokes came faster and harder. Her heart pounded against his ear as she toppled over the edge of the abyss. Throwing her head back, Scully shouted triumphantly. "Ooooooh yeeeeessss, Muuuuulderrrrrr!" The redhead bucked wildly on Mulder's lap as the tidal wave of his own orgasm washed over him. "Ooooooooh GOD!" he screamed, his hips jerking wildly as their spasms subsided. Their moans ascended high above them, mingling in the arched band shell before soaring out into the darkened park. Through the haze of orgasm, both Mulder and Scully became aware of a dull roar. "Thunder," she whispered before collapsing against his chest. Mulder peered over her shoulder, blowing wisps of her hair away from his face. "No," he said with a hint of amusement, "not thunder." "Rain?" she queried, hoping he was just basking in the moment. "No... well, yeah... but that's not the noise you're hearing." Scully slowly craned her neck to see the small crowd that had gathered during their amorous act. A couple of teenagers, a business man, a homeless woman, and an old woman with a barking runt of a dog had all gathered to watch the festivities. And the very same group was now applauding wildly. "I think they want us to take a bow, honey," Mulder teased before nipping at her earlobe. He waved at the crowd and they tossed dollar bills, coins, and an empty can onto the stage before dispersing quietly. "At least they didn't want our autographs." Dana whimpered and buried her face in his neck. "Oh my god," she mumbled. "It's okay," he said. "It's not like they saw anything." "Mulder!" she exclaimed, sitting upright. "They saw us having sex! What do you mean they didn't see anything?" "Well, not anything, anything." He made hand gestures at her open shirt. "Your skirt covered most of it." "What if they call the police, Mulder?" she said, pulling herself off him. "What if we get... fined or something?" Mulder followed her, picking up the blanket and the stray money. "Come on, let's get out of here." Hopping off the stage, Mulder looked behind him to make sure he hadn't dropped anything and smiled at what he saw. "Hey Scully," he called. "I don't think we have anything to worry about." When she turned, he pointed to a sign next to the stage and she smiled, too. The sign read: TONIGHT: PERFORMANCE ART. THE END May 27, 1999 FEEDBACK sought for voracious fic authors' consumption. Please reply to lone_jaguar@geocities.com & heathers@gtn.net and we will be forever in your gratitude. Shameless plug time: Visit Heathers' SMUTsters Paradise at http://heathers.webjump.com for the original MSR NC-17 ONLY archive!