Disclaimer/Author notes: I do not own DBZ or Star Trek or John De Lancie though I wish I did, and I’m not making any money off of this. This is my first crossover story between Dragonball Z and Star Trek. I’ve gotten a lot of good reviews on this story so it’s not as dumb as it sounds.

Dragonball Q?

By: L.A. Whitfield

The Civil War had ended and once again, there was peace in the Continuum, all thanks to Q and the crew of Voyager. Poor Q however, couldn’t have any peace because he had one very important job to do which took up most of his time and energy. His very important job was, fatherhood. Mrs. Q was off visiting her mother so he was stuck with little Q for a week.

Mrs. Q and himself were the first to ever have a child together in the Q Continuum and they had to make it look like they were having the time of their lives. If they ever hoped for the other Q’s to have children of their own, they had to make it look worth while.

His plan was to start a new generation of Q’s, that would turn the old stale Continuum into a better, more exciting place to live. Sounds easy, but it isn’t.

Little Q was a hand full to say the least. Every day of Q’s existence since little Q came along, was exhausting and nearly impossible. If he took his eyes off of little Q for a second, all hell would break loose. Literally...

Once, little Q opened up a portal to another dimention and blew up a planet! He ended up irradiating an entire species to extinction and it had all been just an accident! Q didn’t want to think about what little Q might try when he got older. It wasn’t a pleasant thought.

He couldn’t understand before why no one ever tried to have a Q child. They were too afraid to even try. It was considered just too dangerous! Now he knew why.

Desperate times however called for desperate measures forcing Q to do something to end the war and so now, with his son, life for him would never be the same again. He was responsible for everything little Q did and if little Q ever did something so bad that it threatened all of existence and himself, Q would sacrifice his own life to save his son’s if he had to. That’s how much he loved him. Besides, little Q was going to grow up to become the leader of the Continuum some day.

He often imagined how humorous it would be to just one day, drop little Q off into John Luke Picard’s lap while on the bridge of the Enterprise, commanding it. He liked Picard too much though to do that. The Enterprise wouldn’t last very long against little Q. If you think of it in human terms, little Q is in that stage which humans refer to as the terrible two’s. The Enterprise would be destroyed within seconds. Even the great Picard wouldn’t be able to save his pretty little ship.

Today, he and little Q were taking a little trip through time to the past. Not their past but to the humans past. They were observing primitive humans and had just come from the year 2500. Pretty boring. Now, they were coming up to the year 2000. One of Q’s favorite stages in human evolution because it was the turn of a new century(which many human’s believed would be the end of the world) and humans were still so primitive. They stepped out of the time portal Q had created and found themselves standing in some one’s living room. On the floor in front of a TV sat two kids watching cartoons.

Q looked around a little bored and sighed. Little Q was over thrilled to be there since he never had been there. All of this was new to him. He had so many places to go and to discover that Q was kind of envious of him. Q has already seen everything there is to see.

“Father, what are those human children doing?” Little Q asked holding his father’s hand and pointing to two little kids sitting down in front of a TV set watching cartoons. Q looked down at his son fondly and smiled.

“They are watching television.” He explained reaching down patting his son affectionately on the head.

“What is, television?” Little Q asked pulling out a little sphere from his pocket and holding it against his chest. Inside the sphere, rotated a small planet and around the planet rotated a little moon much like Earth’s. Q sat down on the floor and pulled his son onto his lap. They where sitting right next to the human children but they couldn’t see them because they were invisible.

“Well son, this television, is a primitive form of what humans in our time call the holoprojector. Instead of being displayed as holograms, the images are displayed on that little square tube as pictures. It’s very primitive, especially for humans.” He explained pointing at the TV screen. Little Q seemed awe struck.

“Oh, can they interact with it?” He asked jumping up and down in Q’s lap. Q held his son still and began again.

“Yes they can, but only by playing video games or by ordering movies on their satellite dishes.” Q explained patiently.

“Ohhhh, you mean like the games Amanda used to play on the holodeck on Captain Picard’s ship?” Little Q asked. Q often took little Q to visit with Amanda because she was the only other young Q, and she loved to tell little Q stories of her life before the Continuum. She was actually the first Q child born but she was only half Q, so she wasn’t as important as little Q was. Little Q was full Q. Many of the other Q’s, didn’t like Amanda and still felt she didn’t belong there. After the war though, everyone forgot about Amanda it seemed and all the attention turned to little Q, their new hope for the future. When he thought about it, he realizes now that having Janeway’s child would have been a mistake because it would have been another Amanda. Q had an excuse for not thinking of that though. The war. It really screwed with his head.

He had been very desperate then though he refused to show it to anyone, especially Janeway. The world as he’d known it, was threatening to fall apart around him, not to mention the world for everyone else. Janeway only helped him, to save her own world and her ship. Captains always thought about their ship and crew first.

That doesn’t mean she didn’t feel sympathetic for Q though. That is why he had chosen Kathy at first to mother his child. She had a soft but firm side to her that he really admired. But what had he been thinking of? It wouldn’t of helped things in the long run. Janeway was right about creating a new Q with Mrs. Q.

“Yes, that’s right son.” Q said proudly bringing his thoughts back to the present time. At least the present time they were now in.

Little Q giggled and shook his head. “I like it when we go visit Picard daddy! I like to play tricks on him!” Q covered his son’s mouth quickly and looked around nervously. If Mrs. Q heard that, she would put him into a Pillory and leave him there for centuries.

His son began to speak again but his words were muffled. Q pulled his hand away and held his finger up to the lips.

“Hush son. We don’t want you mother finding out about that.” Q whispered winking at his son. Little Q giggled again and covered his own mouth.

“Oh yeah, I forgot. Sowwy daddy.” Little Q apologized.

“That’s ok little Q, just remember not to mention that out loud because your mother can hear us if she’s listening. She could be listening now and if she is, I’m in trouble.” Q said gulping.

“Ok!” Little Q said cheerfully turning to the television. Q sighed and thought about all the little pranks he’s pulled on Picard with his son along. Teaching him the tricks of the trade so to speak. Picard never saw who was responsible but had a pretty good idea who it was.

Once, he even screamed out Q’s name in anger after stepping into the turbo lift and falling into a large puddle of baby food. He smelled of liver and onions for days.

Q thought it was funny as hell the way people reaction as Picard walked by them because he still stunk so badly. Especially Riker. Everyone respected the man too much to react in front of him but behind his back was another story. Hehe...

“What’s so funny daddy?” Little Q asked noticing his father laughing to himself. Q smiled down at his son.

“Just thinking about something funny. Do you remember the time we put your left over baby food in the turbo lift on Picard’s ship?” Q asked nudging his son. Little Q’s face lit up with recognition and he began to laugh.

“Yeah! That was funny! Can we do that again some time?” Q stood up ready to go.

“Of course little Q! It’s always fun picking on Picard but hush, hush, remember?” Q asked holding his finger up to his lips again. Little Q nodded and held up his finger to his lip.

“Ok, are you ready to go little Q?” Q asked getting ready to open up another portal but little Q shook his head no and pointed to the TV.

“Daddy, can we go in there?” He asked. Q raised his eye brows and stared at the TV set.

“You want to go inside the TV?” Q asked confused. Why would he want to go inside a TV set? Little Q shook his head madly.

“NO! I want to go to that world on the TV! I want to go to DBZ world!” Little Q shouted jumping up and down. Q frowned and thought about it for a second.

“You know what son, that’s a great idea! I haven’t gone into a TV show in ages! Are you sure though that’s where you want to go?” Q asked bending down to meet his son at eye level. Little Q nodded his head again madly and started spinning around.

“YES! That’s where I want to go!”

“All right then! Grab my hand son and hold on!” Q said holding out his hand. Little Q took his father’s hand and closed his eyes anxiously. With the snap of his fingers, they were gone.