| Log on | Make the barbie hotter |
| Log off | Don't add any more wood |
| Monitor | Keeping an eye on the barbie |
| Download | Get the firewood off the ute |
| Floppy disc | What you get lifting too much firewood at once |
| Window | What you shut when it's cold |
| Screen | What you shut in the mozzie season |
| Byte | What mozzies do |
| Bit | What mozzies did |
| Mega byte | What Townsville mozzies do |
| Chip | A bar snack |
| Micro chip | What's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips |
| Modem | What you did to the hay fields |
| Dot Matrix | Old Dan Matrix's wife |
| Laptop | Where the cat sleeps |
| Software | Plastic knives and forks you get at the Take Away |
| Hardware | Real stainless steel knives and forks |
| Mouse | What eats the grain in the shed |
| Mainframe | What hold the shed up |
| Web | What spiders make |
| Web site | The shed or under the verandah |
| Curser | The old bloke at the end of the bar who swears a lot |
| Search engine | What you do when the ute won't go |
| Upgrade | steep hill |
| Server | The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch |
| Mail server | The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch |
| User | The neighbour who keeps borrowing things |
| Network | When you have to repair your fishing net |
| Internet | Complicated fish net repair method |
| Netscape | When fish manoeuvres out of reach of net |
| Online | When you get the laundry hung out |
| Offline | When the pegs don't hold the washing up |
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