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Hey man, bebopadeewelcome to the foremost home of Groove, Style and Despotism anyplace on the world wide Funky Webster! Come on in and light up a jazz cigarette! Find out the extent of your psychosis, Laugh mercilessly at an australian hustler and know the secret truth behind those lovable bundles of funk, the Teletubbies. Hey, and sign my guestbook or I'll be forced to put you in my Grooovy purple gas chamber!


Read My Life story or check out some Funky Shit

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My URL: http://fly.to/funky_fascist

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My Life Story



What's that? Y'wanna hear my life story? OK, that's one request I'm happy to fill. I was born out of wedlock to a swingin' sister who was actually my mother but hey, thats the problem with slang, man. At the age of 2, I could beat a funky rhythm on my bongo drums, and by 3, I was a trumpet player to diiiiie for. At the age of 15, I attempted my first hostile military coup on a government which just was not chillin' enough to my likin'. Needless to say I failed, and me and some other cats were put on public trial. In my defence I played a soulsome melody on my funky sax and not only was I released but the people joined me in garroting the distinctly unbuzzin' Royal family with piiiiiano wire. Talk about jazz justice, catboy. So I became the dictator of love and passed a law to give me priorities over the slinky chicks of my republic. That was a popular measure, skibbeedoodah!!!! In 1972, I held my first great purge of the terminally funkless, killing a million soulless hand clappers in two days, that was a day upon which I felt especially chilled y'know. I now live happily with my wives and piano in a huge palace of groove. rammalamadeebahdoooobey!, Yeah.


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THE ENGLISH PATIENT ATE MY BALLS!!!

Site maintained, fed and disciplined by The Despot. He would like to thank Elton John for being such a fat wiggy tosser all these years, "hey elton, I'm so impressed you managed to encapsulate the mood of a nation for which you could have ended poverty with your Coke habit money by singing a cheesey song... Cheers!




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