Before you read you know the drill I don’t own Greg Proops, Ryan
Stiles, Tony Slattery, Colin Mochrie. If I did that’s be interesting but I don’t
so don’t sue, please I like to keep my two pennies to rub together thank you.
Enjoy and all, or cringe in disgust whichever you wish.
By: Speccychick
The
air was heavy and damp; the smoke from his cigarette was stubbed into an
ashtray, “I’m calling it a night.” He said to himself while he wiped his
black-framed glasses. Then closed the door behind him as he let the club. As he
headed to his car he noticed a package on his windshield, “shit, not again” he
moaned, “I thought I was out of the spy business,” as he opened it and saw a
tape and a tape player.
As he drove he played the
tape from the package. “Good evening, Mr. Proops, remember you’re not out until
we buzz you out. Your mission is to retrieve the Golden Burnoose of
Groovefunkistan, which is known to give the great powers to whom ever wears it.
But… you will be having some competition with a worthy advisory who is also
after it. His name is Brad Sherwood.” "How can that be?" He
thought, "I thought he was dead?" Brad was once a member of the
organization, until the Great Twiglett Accident of 94', which
both Agent Proops and Sherwood were partnered to the case. The voice brung Greg
back to the surface of his thoughts. “You must retrieve the burnoose before he can lay his filthy monkey
paws on it. Good luck, Mr. Proops. This tape will self-destruct in 5 minutes. BE
KIND REWIND.” Greg threw the tape out the window; as he sped off heard an
explosion behind him “they got to use less explosives in those tapes.”
* * *
Somewhere in the California (I
think.)
In the organization’s secret
laboratory stood empty expect for Agent Proops and Head Scientist Mochrie.
“Mr. Proops your mission will be
treacherous; I’ve made a few helpful tools that will assist you along the way.
Such as these black-framed glasses similar to your own yet with a few upgrades,
so to speak. When you push this button on the right side of these glasses they
can magnify 1000x more. And the left button they become able to see through
solid matter. Don’t try looking through
peoples’ clothes it just disappointing.”
As Greg was examining them and looking at
Colin he could see why; Colin was wearing pink fluffy underwear and a matching
bra, he immediately found the off switch. “This Hugo Boss black suit is lined with a
bulletproof material that can withstand any kind of armory attack and it even stain
proof, dry clean only. And this cigarette case also encases a small computer so
you can report back to the organization.” Next to the cigarette case was a
pilot pen which Greg noticed, “and this pen; does it contain some small camera
or recording device?” “No, I just
thought it looked nifty and see it even comes with a light. Colin said with
smarty-pants tone, “Oh, I nearly forgot, the Host thought you may be needing
some transportation,” Mochrie said as he pulled a lever revealing a sleek dark
sapphire-colored Jaguar. “I assume you know how to drive one?” “Why of course,
what do you think I am a rookie?” “Your mission will first taking you to
Sherwood’s latest sighting, Las Vegas, NV. at the Bellagio Casino. I suggest
you equip yourself with your tools; your flight will be in a few hours.”
* * *
Bellagio Casino, Las Vegas,
NV—-9:37p.m.
Agent Proops, walked to the high rollers’ blackjack tables where unless you were dressed in for the game, you wouldn’t be caught there unless you were willing to argue with the awkwardness of being there in a loud Hawaiian shirt and Bermuda shorts. He was dressed the Hugo Boss suit and the black-framed glasses that Mochrie had provided for the mission.
“Is this seat taken?” he asked a man dressed in an Armani charcoal-black suit and dark red dress shirt; “no, go ahead, by the way name’s Brad Sherwood.” His voice had a tinge of hostility yet glossed in sugary syrup. “Proops, Greg Proops.” “Take your bets, gentlemen?” asked the blackjack dealer; the dealer was a woman of round 30-something jet-black hair and eyes deep as ice cravens. Greg put down 10,000; Sherwood did the same. The dealer dealt their cards giving Sherwood 20 and Greg 18. “Any hits gentlemen?” Sherwood signal stand while Greg said, “hit me” while he had touched the left side of his glasses. “Are you sure sir?” “Yes.” The dealer hit him and as if in slow motion the card pelted onto the table giving him 21. “I am truly amazed with such a daring risk.” Sherwood complemented, which sounded more as a threat. “Lucky, that all it was.” “I guess lady luck was just on your side.” As the night grew on as the dark began to lighten; they both won and lost, more on the side of Sherwood for he did not lady luck’s x-ray vision. So they began say their adieus, “So long Mr. Proops I hope we will meet again. “Sooner then you think,” Greg thought; “Good Night and Good Bye, Mr. Sherwood.”
As Greg entered his room he reported back to the Organization. He clicked on his computer; the screen came to life with the image of a long-faced man. “Hello, Mr. Proops, we have been expecting your report.” Somewhat stunned to see this man. “Why Agent Ryan, I expected the Host” “Oh, he’s in the john. Anyways, do have any news on Brad?” “Yeah, I found him; we played a bit of blackjack. He didn’t recognize me thou, as if we never worked together. It was bizarre.” Greg said with a tinge of emotion. Ryan began to speak, “Well, remember is no longer the Brad we all knew. Umm… now back to business we have found he is heading to London, England to meet with the curator of the British Museum. Her name is Ms. Evans Magullacutti, the photo you see now was taken a couple hours ago...” an image appear on Greg’s screen but not of Ms. Magullacutti instead of Agent Stiles in a French maid outfit prancing around the Host’s office. Disturbed by this image Proops interrupted Ryan, “Umm… Ryan there is no picture of this woman, but of you in a French maid outfit in the Host’s office.”
“Oh! Umm, don’t pay attention to that it’s a fake, ya, that’s it,” muttered Ryan “Here’s the right picture.” And suddenly Ryan’s curious picture left the screen and a picture of a woman appeared as she was leaving a building.
The woman was around forty, she had olive skin with light green eyes. Her hair was red auburn hair; which fiercely guarded her shoulders. She was dressed in a light gray jacket with a darker shade of gray under her jacket, which belonged to a knee-length skirt.
“She will be meeting with Sherwood tomorrow around 8:00 p.m. at a pub known as the Drowned Blue Rat. Your flight will be in a few hours. You will also be met by Agent Slattery.” “All right, I will be at the airport around 45 minutes, Agent Proops out.” The computer screen black out and had become an original-looking cigarette case again.
As Greg had packed his things he hummed a jazz tune he heard a long time ago, when he and Sherwood were rookies in the spy business. “Man, how did it happen? We were both there but all I remember is the beginning and after the accident.” Greg wondered, “What happened during in the middle of it? Why can’t I remember it, why?” suddenly there was a knock at his door, Greg was taken from his thoughts and back to the reality. He opened the door revealing his midnight guest. It was the blackjack dealer from earlier before.
“Hello, can I help you?” he asked the blackjack dealer.
“Yes, but can you help yourself?” the dealer asked, Greg was taken aback for a moment but kept his suaveness and responded with a coolness that even made him feel assured. “Yes, no offense, but why are you here? Not that I don’t mind that a beautiful woman would come for a midnight visit?”
It’s about the man you were playing blackjack with…”she looked around with desperation, “you must find him before it’s too late.”
Suddenly the lights went off and there was a shot fired. As Greg pulled out his pocket light and turn it on to look for the light switch he stumbled “I’m sorry…” his words were trailed off as he found his midnight guest on the floor with dead. “Shit.”
* * *
He had called Agent Stiles, saying he was going to be a bit tardy. “Why? You know we’re running on a tight schedule.” Ryan asked, “Well, there’s the body in my room.” Greg stated casually “Oh, well, don’t worry the clean up crew will be there in half an hour. Who is she by the way?” “Well, she was the blackjack dealer at my table. Then, around midnight she came to my room…” but he was cut off by Agent Stiles “Greg, did she try to seduce you and try to kill you?” “No, actually she came to warn me, before she got murdered that I must find Brad before it’s too late then the lights went off and a shot. Never got an answer why; since she’s dead.” “Did you see who did it?” “No, as I said all I heard was the shot and I turned on my pen light so I can search for the light and while I was looking for the switch I stumbled onto her, literally.”
TBC
* * *
Please give me feedback. Don’t worry I’ll keep writing
once my muses stop fighting what happens next. Thanks for bothering with my
fanfic.