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Limitations
Author:
Conor McKenna
Rating: PG-13
This is in response to the challenge set by Margot on the BBBfic
board. Challenge requirement: A new Demon, an old character returning and
a film quote. My quote is: "A man's gotta know his limitations"
said by Dirty Harry in Magnum Force
Setting: The story is set between the end of series three and the start of
series four of the BtVS TV series.
Rating: I'd say PG because nothing scary happens but I suppose some people
need warned that some things should only be attempted by fictional
characters.
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters in this story (except maybe for
that demon that I made up). The story is set in the world of Buffy the
Vampire Slayer, which belongs to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy Inc and Fox
Television. I am simply borrowing them to amuse myself, they own them, not
me, and I only have claims on this particular scenario yada yada yada…
Thanks to Shona for checking over and removing my mistakes.
The car spluttered again, like an old smoker, struggling up the barely
noticeable hill. The car like Xander, had taken enough misery and the
noise faded to a sad silence. Xander took the most valuable item in the
vehicle from the CD player with annoyance, resignation and frustration at
his previous optimism for his chronically ill car on this day trip from
the almost comic reality of Oxnard. He unenthusiastically started up the
slight rise that twisted back on itself onto a much steeper climb up past
the dripping, overhanging trees under the grey roof of the cloud infested
sky and into the misty rain falling. Up ahead was the target. The famous
welcome of the Fallen Inn, perched hazardously on the edge of the
mountainside. The notorious stop off for bandits from the east, merchants
from the north and adventurers, like Xander, from the south.
Xander hadn't had time off the dish washing duties for seventeen days and
now, finally released into the real world on his own, he was going to mix
it up in the famous cowboy stop. He was taken by his own
pride in the dismal little adventure he was playing out this summer.
Dismal as it may be, it was all of his own and in a way the tribulations
he had dealt through had pleased him, both for the humour and enjoyment he
had managed to derive from it and also for a sense of what Uncle Rory
would describe as "character building". While his adversaries
had been the more mundane perils when compared to those Buffy and Willow
would undoubtedly face down over the summer months, adversaries such as
late rent, harassment from the numerous tequila fuelled hen parties and a
chronically unhappy boss and Giles was not likely to get overly excited
and go chasing one of his numerous ancient texts over the flying dishes
that Xander had to avoid each night, they were decidedly more difficult to
approach. Attacking a hen party with an axe or a scythe was not a
realistic option no matter how much Xander dreamt of the possibility.
Xander was proud because he had shown strength when there was nothing to
do but grin and bare it or to pick up the pieces and start again. He had
grown up and had grown resourceful over this summer and reckoned he could
now deal with the adult world just as effectively as Team Slayer had dealt
with the Mayor all those months back. "Argharger-ah!" woke
Xander from his self-congratulatory musing. "Argharger-ah!" the
something repeated sounding angry. Xander looked up in disbelief.
Something was definitely standing in his way and Xander got the distinct
impression the two claws extending in his
direction were not for some friendly greeting ritual. The creature was
slow moving but direct and at least seven feet tall. Xander could see a
vague, grey face, very ugly. Its powerful shoulders sloped downwards
giving the impression this creature was more comfortable traversing on all
fours. In fact, the thick, shaggy, curly, black hair on the fleshy torso
gave the creature the appearance of an overgrown, friendly puppy though
not a particularly housebroken mutt. And it was still coming towards
Xander, shouting. Xander felt the familiar dry throat and racing heart of
fear. Giles would undoubtedly be able to identify this particular demon
breed, point out its weakness and give Xander the correct cutting
implement for the job or better yet, Xander considered, tell Buffy and
give her the correct tool. Surveying his options Xander summarised he had
few. The demon thing was making its way down towards him and all Xander
could see for a weapon was a damp stick a couple of meters away. Instinct
over powered Xander and he used his best defence against this man-dog
demon. He ran.
Xander ran as fast as he could. Cleverly he ran up past the surprised,
awkward, slow moving demon. The dog beast dropped to all fours and made a
step or two up the hillside towards the racing fugitive, a look of unsure
puzzlement on its face at the loss of such physical advantages to the
departed Xander. Xander checked back and giggled breathlessly at the
perplexed look of a confused doggie. Convinced that the demon man-dog was
not going to follow him, Xander slowed to a walk. A lack of knowledge,
weapons and ability was not going to prevent Xander from enjoying this day
trip, he laughingly considered. After all, if Chuck at the club and a
cursed car couldn't stop him spending his day in the Fallen Inn then what
chance did a demon have?
Xander walked up and through the paint pealing doors of the Fallen Inn and
straight into an inebriated Larry. "God, Harris, you are still a
clumsy dufus," Larry stepped back from his now dripping glass of
foamy beer with a friendly, enthusiastic rapprochement.
"Larry!" Xander returned with embarrassed relief. Embarrassed
that the noisy entrance to the bar had brought unwelcome attention to his
underage person and relief that the gods would have it that he would
spill an acquaintance's drink instead of a dangerous local such as the
many who were now viewing him with a disdainful contempt.
"Larry!" Xander repeated a little too loud and animated with
sudden
realisation, "Say, aren't you dead?"
"Me?" Larry asked with mock grandeur, "Well, yes, since you
ask." Larry morphed into full vampire visage, changing back again
immediately.
"Oh, no! This is bad. This is so bad."
"What are you talking about? This is great." Larry had the
affable manner of the pleasantly drunk, "I've been looking for a
buddy to share this with. Hell, this summer has been long and dull with no
buddies, can't imagine what eternity would be like?"
"First, we were never buddies. Second, you're a vampire, like evil.
And third, did you say you are on your own?" Xander tried to get
things straight in his mind, as always, by talking out loud.
"Oh, most of these guys are vampires too but I miss having a close
buddy to, you know share things with…" Larry replied easily looking
at Xander expectantly.
"Oh no! This is so so bad." Xander looked round and tried to
take it all in.
Larry was in front of him, swaying a little but still the big hulking
bully who had terrorised Xander so many times before he was even gifted
with vampiric strength and speed. All around in the bar were maybe fifty
people in various stages of alcohol induced euphoria. Most of them looked
decidedly pale but Xander figured that was from an aversion to light
rather than too much alcohol. The situation was indeed very, very bad
Xander confirmed. At least he now knew why this hostelry had such a
mysterious reputation. Xander checked behind him. The door was there but
the intoxicated vampire Larry was as capable of degrading Xander's simple
aspirations as the human tormentor had been all throughout those so
recently departed school years. "Now Xander, you wouldn't be thinking
about leaving, would you?" Larry moved closer and put his arm round
Xander in an outwardly friendly but reproving manner, "You'd never
make it. I could beat you to a pulp even before I had all this raw vampire
strength!" Larry put Xander in a loose headlock and ruffled Xander's
hair playfully but clearly demonstrating his superior size, strength,
speed and awareness. From his restricted viewpoint Xander could see
Larry's logic. Larry let him up.
"Come on. It won't hurt, after the first little bit away. Then freed
from all those restrictions you'll be much happier," Larry soothed
like a self help group "and anyway, what yah goin' to do about
it?" He asked a touch cockily. Xander looked round again at the
hopeless situation. He looked at Larry, who backed off him a little to let
Xander see the entire room and his complete lack of options.
"So what can you do?" Larry asked again, rhetorically.
"Well, a man's gotta know his limitations," Xander smiled with a
sigh.
"Good!" and Larry moved in for the kill and rebirth. Xander
sprang into action. Larry moved quickly to parry and defend but Xander
burst not towards him or the close but out of reach door but away from
them both and a hurdle up on to the pool table one bounce and out the
window. Xander was in free fall. Down, down he fell before a deep splash
into the rushing waters below. After a time Xander resurfaced.
He turned and floated on his back looking up at the now distant speck that
was the Fallen Inn, up on the hill. Xander fancied he could see the broken
window and far above, Larry looking out of it, astonished. Xander began to
giggle with the adrenaline and relief at still being intact after the
fall. Yep Larry, he thought, a man's gotta know his limitations. Can't
fight you, can't take you for speed, then I have to beat you with plain
stupidity. As he continued to float, Xander realised the river would drag
him down stream, to Oxnard and his temporary home. I can do this whole
life thing, Xander smiled to himself.
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