Behind a Curtain

Part 2

After the beating the men had left leaving her alone with the woman. She walked over to where Susan lay on the floor, whimpering.

“Hello.”

She crouched down over Susan, tilting her head to the side and reaching down. She laughed softly when Susan sensed the touch and tried to escape her hand.

“You really are beautiful,” she said distractedly, taking a piece of Susan’s hair between her fingers and twirling it. “Yes… you’d do well working for me.”

She removed Susan’s blindfold. Susan turned her head to the side trying to escape the woman’s dark gaze. The woman’s hand reached over and pulled Susan up so that she leaned against the wall.

“Take off your clothes,” she said, moving back, giving Susan enough space to move, but not much else. Susan and Maia fought for a few moments. Susan wanting to tell the woman to go fuck herself and Maia just wanting to avoid the pain she knew disobedience would cause. A hard kick to her thighs ended the argument. Slowly she raised her arms and pulled the tattered shirt off her shoulders.

The woman’s voice sounded right next to her ear, her breath hot against Susan’s cold skin.

“When I say do something,” Susan jumped when a pair of hands reached behind her, unsnapping her bra. “You do it.”

Even though she knew what was coming she started when the hands moved from behind to maul her breasts. Susan dropped her hands to her sides, only to cry out when the woman’s hand connected with her cheek.

“Did I say stop?”

Susan moved her hands to her waist and unbuttoned her pants. Using the last bit of her energy she lifted her hips so the woman could pull off her pants. And lapsed into her usual role of detached compliance while the abuse continued.

And as the woman climaxed she became completely vulnerable, and Susan could see her life in the woman’s eyes. And for a moment, just for a moment, she pitied her. Then she looked down and saw the look in Susan’s eyes. Susan cried out as the woman pinched her nipples hard.

“Save your pity.” She growled the words through clenched teeth. And the last thing Susan saw before the blindfold was replaced was the woman’s angry eyes burning through her.

*

“She’s all yours, Al. You might wanna stuff something in her mouth to keep her quiet,” the woman said, opening the door. “She’s a screamer.”

She felt a sharp pain as someone jabbed her with a toe as she lay curled, uncaring, on the floor, a prisoner in her own home.

It’s alright… it’s alright… they’ll go soon… they will, they’ll… go…

“Not that anyone will care.”

*

It had been quiet for a while now. Could they really have gone at last? She didn’t really care any more, but she supposed she should find out. Slowly she raised her head and listened.

It was still dark. She hurt. Hurting, pain, humiliation. Pain, sadness. Pain.

She could hear nothing. The room was silent. Empty? She raised a tentative hand up to her face.

“Don’t even think about it.”

The voice was cold, loud in that quiet room. She sank back to the floor, sensing, knowing that the woman was standing somewhere to the right of her, over by the window, watching. Quick steps, coming towards her, a hand wrenching the cloth from hereyes. She whimpered in pain and fear, blinking at the sudden light.

Light. It was daytime and they were still here. She risked a glance round, full of fear and apprehension. The woman leant against the window ledge, staring out into the street below. Shewas tall, maybe mid thirties, sandy hair. She could have been any visitor passing through Babylon 5. Except her eyes. Hard, full of hatred, yet showing age old weariness and struggle, they had seen many things, witnessed many atrocities. They were the eyes of a woman who had stopped caring, who, in the desperate daily struggle to survive, had lost her morality and conscience. Who had played her part for so long she had begun to enjoy it.

Her throat was dry, so raw. She felt like she had cried forever, screaming into the black hole which was her life. Why were they still here? Why did she care? They would leave when they would leave, and then, and only then, would it be over.

“Can I have a drink of water?”

She got the answer she expected, in a calm, almost amused tone.

“No, you cannot. You can shut up though, unless you want…” She took a step towards the sitting woman, who cowered away from her in fear.

“No… no…”

She laughed, moving easily across the room to the dresser upon which Maia kept her meager possessions.

“Are things, perhaps, becoming a little clearer? If Mr. Loisnek tells you to do something,” She swept everything to the floor with a resounding crash. Maia flinched.“…You do it. Understand?”

She crossed quickly to Maia, standing close, grinning at how she cringed away from her.

“Do you understand?”

She nodded painfully, her breathing quick and shallow.

“Y-yes…”

*

They lounged on her floor, playing cards, drinking beer. Occasionally, when the mood took them, one or other of the men would rise and lounge over to where Maia lay cowering on the bed, trying to make herself as small a target as possible, and drag her up by the hair. The pain was intense while it lasted, but was bearable, and she found herself becoming used to the repeated invasions, allowing the whole scene to drift together. She had no idea how long it lasted, found it difficult, after a while, to even tell the men apart. All she knew was that the woman, after that first attack, had not touched her again, but remained standingat the window, maintaining a constant vigil, seeming not to notice what went on in the room. It grew dark. They had been here nearly 24 hours. Were they ever going to go? The night dragged on. The torment continued. Maia was vaguely aware that there was something she ought to remember, but it was so difficult to focus. Nothing seemed clear any more. Finally, for no apparent reason, the woman turned to face the room.

“Okay, guys. Get it together. We’re out of here”

She heard movement and activity as if in a dream. Felt herself dragged upright, acquiescing to ease the inevitable pain. Moaning now as the beating recommenced, fists slamming into her face and body, again and again and again. Hearing a low forceful hiss in her ear, trying to concentrate on it,to please.

“You will be contacted again. I think, this time, you’ll make sure you’re there…”

One last blow, then blissful, merciful blackness enveloped her.

*

She tried to move and groaned. Her whole body ached. It was daylight, she had no idea how long she’d slept. Her brain swam back to consciousness. Light. Hurting her eyes. It took her a while to think of a solution but eventually it occurred to her. She shut them. Better. Pain. All over. Her body screaming in protest at the slightest movement, Nothing she could do about it. Blood. Dried on her face and body, coppery in her mouth. Salty in her mouth.

Salty in her mouth.

She retched suddenly, gagging and heaving her disgust, the movement sending spikes of pain through her body. Retching uselessly, again and again, crying tears of pain and disgust, as if she could somehow purge the feelings of despair that lay rooted deep inside. Water… oh God, what she wouldn’t do for a glass of cool water right now. But there was none, she knew. It would have to wait. As sleep moved to reclaim her, she was left with the single nagging feeling that there was something, something crucially important that she was forgetting.

*

When she woke again her head felt a little clearer. Though it still hurt like hell she was able to sit up and view the remains of her room. Her dresser was smashed beyond repair, the bottles and tubes broken and empty. Her mattress lay on the floor, shredded; the bed itself was wrecked and unmendable. As she sat tearfully sifting through the wreck of her possessions, pathetically hoping to find something, anything, intact, the slow cold tide of realization hit her. Work… she had missed at least two nights at the bar, maybe more. Oh God… after all she had gone through to get that horrible job… if she lost it she didn’t know what she was going to do. There was no one. That was part of what made her new life so hard. Before, on Babylon 5, she had thought she was lonely, but now she was entirely alone. She saw now how easy it would be to sink into despair, and how hard it would be ever to climb out again. Overcome by despair, she leant against the wall and cried.

*

She was jolted back to the present, aware that she had drifted off due to her extreme exhaustion. The transport was slowing, stopping. The tired woman obeyed unquestioningly as she was pulled out and made to walk along smooth ground. She stumbled. She was so tired. The last week had been so hard. She allowed her thoughts to wander again. Although they only returned her to previous pain, at least they prevented her from having to deal with the present.

After she had woken, she had dumbly washed herself as best she could, dressed, and made her way hopelessly to the bar. Keir Lowestoft, her boss, eyed her expressionlessly as she stood in his doorway.

“Can I do something for you?”

She stood silent, realizing she had nothing to say.

“I, um…” she looked down at her feet. “Did you want me to work tonight?”

“Work?” He stood up. “You stupid slut, you don’t turn up for three days, you don’t call in, you leave me with no one to cover, and then you have the nerve to waltz in here and ask for work?!”

“I’m sorry…” she stammered, her face flushing.

“…And look at you! You’re a mess! You look like you haven’t slept for a week. So what happened, then? Your boyfriend beat you up? I’d guess you deserved it.”

She turned to go, tears stinging her eyes.

“That’s right, get the hell out of my bar and don’t come back. And don’t think you’ll get a job in any of the places round here anytime soon. Oh, a little tip? If you don’t want people to know, you’d better do a better job of hiding the marks than that.”

She left the office in silence, her face burning with shame.

And in the weeks that had followed, she had used up her last few credits on food, becoming increasingly desperate as the days passed. Despite Keir’s threats, she tried for the first two days to get work at the seedier joints of town, but the proprietors took one look at her sad, hungry eyes and shook their heads, smiling.

“Sorry, baby, nothing going here.” Slut.

She slept on the streets now, clutching her thin blanket, the one thing she tried to keep clean as everything around her degenerated into a sea of filth. She scrounged what she could from passers by, scavenged through trashsometimes when there was nothing else. She had stopped caring what she looked like, the grime and the dirt and the tangled hair no longer mattered to her. The alleys were her home and the misery her constant companion. She slept as much as she could, forsleep blocked everything out and she could escape into the wonderful world of dream and memory. But her body’s needs would force her periodically back to the surface, refused to let her drift away, for ever. During these periods, she sometimes thought of Loisnek, knowing he was watching, waiting, though for what, she did not know. Knew only that he was out there somewhere, and that he had not forgotten her.

And so it had gone on, until one day as she lay sleeping, curled uncaring on her blanket, she became blearily aware of a foot poking her. She opened her eyes carefully to see a well dressed young man eyeing her with distaste.

“Are you Maia?” he asked.

She considered. Yes, she was Maia now. She had always been Maia. She nodded with difficulty.

“Mr. Loisnek requires your presence. Be here at 22:00 tomorrow.” He turned and vanished.

She lay thinking. 22:00. She no longer thought in hours, or days. Time was just a concept, a medium to be wasted as much as possible in blessed oblivion. It did not matter. She had no plans to move from this place, didn’t know if she even could. The thought of escape did not even occur to her. She simply laid down her head and sought reacceptance to the world of dream.