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| This page will show you how to make a Vertically Challenged person's Podium Box. This is probably the best MMI make and has the hardest name to pronounce. This Product has been tested at shows and recieved a lot of applause. WARNING: THERE IS MATHEMATICS ENVOLVED IN THIS PRODUCT, BUT WE WILL GIVE YOU THE FORMULA FOR THE CACULATIONS. IF YOU NEED AN ADULT TO HELP, GET ONE, IF YOU ARE AN ADULT AND YOU NEED HELP WHY THER HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT THIS SITE? GO BACK TO SCHOOL. Remember: MMI or any of the Stoned!! inc. companies are not responsible for any harm caused when using this product, whether it be cut using scissors or being shot by an offended vertically challenged person. |
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| What You Need A Box that comes up roughly to just below your knees A VERY old pair of shoes or trainers A tape measure A pair of compasses A Calculator A Pair of Scissors A saw |
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| Step 1 Cut out a hole from the bottom of the old shoes, big enough to allow your leg to pass through it. Our MMI scientists tried a circular saw, but it didn't work. The tell us that the best way to do it is to saw horizontaly from the top of the sole at the back of the shoe along to the bridge of the shoe (The bit that goes up to fit your foot). If you don't understand this, give up now as this is the easy bit! |
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| Step 2 Test that the shoe can fit nicely all the way up to just below your knee. Make sure it isn't too tight as it could mess up your leg. |
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| Step 3 Measure the size of your leg just below your knee. Our test subject in the picture was 40cm. This is the matematics part... This measurement is the circumference. Divide this by the pi symbol on your calculator, or just divide it by 3.14.? This answer is the Circumference. Now divide this by 2. The answer you get is the radius. Write this down as it will come in handy in a while... FINALLY WE HAVE FOUND A USE FOR MATHS! |
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| Step 4 Know it's time to use the radius you calculated. Set your Compasses to the size of the radius and use them to mark out the two holes needed for your legs to go in. Make sure you put the holes towards the back of the box as you will need the room at the front for your feet. Do not place the holes on the side of the box with the flaps. |
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| Step 5 Cut out the holes that you marked on. Now put on the shoes, step in the box and pretend to be a vertically challenged person. Now when your Mum says you never do any work, you can say; " I have done maths, i used pi to work out the radius of my leg so that i can create a hole big enough for my leg for my vertically challenged person's podium box" And hopefully she will leave you alone to practice your podium speech skills... |