Memorable Quotes from Turge Babonet

There are many times when somebody should have reminded alleged filmmaker Turge Babonet that his microphone was on. Here are a few of them.
"You think shit is unimportant? Try going two days without taking a crap. Then you tell me how unimportant shit is!"
-Cannes, 1982, on his continual cinematic references to "turds"

"No one has ever died on a Turge Babonet set!"
-Le Monde, 1991, in reference to his flood of Eastern European productions

"Ron Howard is a hack. Scorsese is a hack. Altman is a hack. I make films."
-Sundance, 1989

"No crybabies, please. I don't do diapers."
-Dutch Television, 1993, on his directorial style

"You're telling me how to make a film?!"
-Sundance, 1987, during a international financing panel

"At least with Letterman, you know people are watching the program."
-Conan O'Brien Show, 1993

"There is no tonic greater than a beautiful woman. Unless you're a homosexual man..."
-San Francisco Chronicle, 1992, at a Turge Babonet Retrospective at the Castro Theater

"Warhol. A faggot through and through."
- 1987, on the death of Andy Warhol and Babonet's brief time at the Factory

"In film, you can direct reality. In real life, you have to hit people."
-At First You Laugh (Then You Die) press junket, 2000

"When directing, sometimes actors need to be pushed in the right direction. Other times they need to be struck."
-The Filmmakers, PBS, 1979, on his directorial style

"Orson Wells was a fat man who couldn't keep his camera still."
-Rotterdam Film Festival, 1985, on comparisons to Orson Wells

"Sure, my films are like modern paintings. And I can [urinate] my name in the snow too."
-Cannes, 1972

"His films give me a headache."
- 1999, on P.T. Anderson

"He's a black man, isn't he? It shows."
- 1992, on Spike Lee

"At least you can look at her [breasts] if the film gets boring."
-71st Annual Academy Awards Ceremony, 1998, on Winona Ryder

"I have the same question everybody else has: are they real?"
-Film Threat, 2004, on Lindsay Lohan

"In the end, I'm just that lost child left alone at the cinemahouse."

"Movies are a way of showing God where he went wrong."
-attributed, date unknown

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