| Larry's homerun total at the time of this posting | |
| number of Hooters restaurants Larry has visited in the past 6 months | |
| number of illegitimate children Larry must have to catch Shawn Kemp for first place among pro athletes | |
| price of an order of 10 chicken wings at Hooters | |
| number of times you will hear me say the following phrase, "Come on Chipper, get a hit" | |
| number (in millions) of times I will say, "I hope this retard strikes out," when Larry is batting |