CHAPTER9COC

CHAPTER 9

Wearily Richard took off his goggles as he entered the quite living quarters. The apartment was in total darkness except for the vid screen. Foggily he wondered why it had been left on. It was going on 0300 hours and he knew the family would’ve been in bed for quite a while.
A small smile crossed his lips as he realized that Hill had become part of the “family.” Not one of them blood related to the other, but they were a cohesive unit nonetheless. A group of people that loved each other for the shear want of it. As a child he had dreamed of having a family like this. It had taken a hellish life, and the giving up of hope of ever having one, before it had finally happened. And he pitied any asshole who tried to rip them apart.
His biggest concern was that some bureaucratic eager beaver would get wind of Toni’s disappearance and come for Hill. It would be a cold day in hell before he’d let that happen. But so far nothing had been said or done. Like so many victims of crime and domestic upheaval, Toni Platz and her child had fell through the cracks of all the so-called “caring” authorities.
He knew first hand about “caring” authorities. Close minded idiots every last one of them. They had screwed him every time they touched his life. From the foster families he was placed with to the prison psychiatrists. He wondered sometimes if his life would’ve been somehow better if a loving passer by had found him in that trash bin instead of a duty minded cop.
Just one more of those woulda’s, shoulda’s, coulda’s.
He hung his head in exhaustion from both his long hours searching and the re-hashing of bad memories. He had a hard time remembering when he’d been more tired, though he was sure he had been at some point in time. The three week search for Toni Platz and Burt Leffner had slowly enervated him. Almost every spare moment of his time had been spent combing the Polaris Station. His every heightened sense extending itself, and his strength, for the least hint of their whereabouts.
They hadn’t left the station. His surreptitious perusal of the out-bound logs verified that. No one even coming close to Leffner or Toni’s description had gone off-station. And that frustrated him greatly. He could understand if Leffner had dropped off the face of the station. After all, he was an ex-con and knew how to keep a low profile. But not Toni.
He was ninety-nine percent sure that she was dead. Finding her body or a report of someone else finding her body would provide Zar and Audrey with closure. Maybe then they wouldn’t get that half terrified, half hopeful look in their eyes whenever the com sounded or the door buzzed. They both looked like hell. Along with the worry over Toni, Zar had a hard time sleeping when he wasn’t there. The same with Audrey. Leffner’s attack had seemed to bring back all the old insecurities. She even started having nightmares about the crash on Taurus 2 again. With all the searching, he wasn’t there to ease their minds or give them back their sense of security.
After tonight he knew he was going to have to stop the search. Not so much for his sake, but his women’s. If he thought it would result in information he would’ve continued. But he had zippo. And the situation didn’t look like it was going to change...ever. Zar and Audrey wouldn’t be happy, but he knew the inevitable was slowly sinking into their minds. Toni was lost to them forever. A victim of Leffner’s depravity. At least they had been able to save Hill.
Slowly his attention came back to the vid screen. The volume was low but still audible and the images on the screen in dimly lit.
The hand he had raised to shut it off froze as he took one last look at the screen.
The vid wasn’t televising some program originating from the stations entertainment division, it was playing recorded images. Images of a man and a woman having sex.
Him having sex with Miri Lopresso. She was riding him hard, his hands guiding her hips as she gyrated wildly on his lap. He was breathing heavily and she was moaning his name. He watched almost as if from a great distance as he reached for her breasts. She leaned down to kiss him, her hands on either side of his head.
THE BITCH! She must’ve had a hidden recorder in her room! But what did she hope to accomplish by sending Zar the tape? She must’ve known it would end his relationship with Zar. But did she think he’d come running to her?! Not fucking likely! Unless he came after her to wring her conniving neck!
Suddenly he knew Zar was in the room with him. Burning holes into his back with what he was sure would be shattered eyes. He didn’t bother trying to shut off the vid. She had obviously already seen the whole thing. She had left it playing as a welcome for him. A welcome to the end of his life with her.
“Was it worth it?”
The question was barely above a whisper but it carried all her anger and grief inside of it.
He didn’t turn to face her. Knowing that once he did he would have to see the destruction, the desolation, the betrayal.
“Not sure Riddick?” He flinched at the use of his name. The name Zar had relegated to a past life. He still thought of himself as Richard Riddick, but she hadn’t. It had been her way of letting him know that she saw him as a brand new man. A man worth loving.
“You promised. YOU FUCKING PROMISED! ‘If I ever want to do this with someone else, I’ll give you the respect of letting you know Zar! You. Have. My. Word!’ LIAR!”
Zar watched as he leaned his head back. A distant part of herself noticed his weariness. But she couldn’t bring herself to feel compassion.
She had found the disk taped to the outside of the apartment door as she returned from work. Hoping it contained some information regarding Toni, Zar had played it as soon as she entered the dining area.
At first she thought the disk had been taped to the wrong door. It looked like a porno. Then she took a second look at the man.
And her world fell apart.
Part of her realized that something was not right. She had been meant to see that tape with all the consequences that would be rendered. Someone obviously wanted her out of Riddick’s life.
He’d been set up. A trap had been laid and he had stepped in it.
That awareness didn’t change the fact that the man she thought of as her husband was screwing the brains out of another woman. The pain seemed to take forever to hit. It had taken a minute for it to get through the total stupefaction over what she was seeing.
When it did strike, it impacted with the force of a meteor. Getting raped and beaten almost to death hadn’t hurt this bad! The only pain worse had been witnessing the bludgeoning death of Beth and watching Audrey lose the fight for life after her suicide attempt. At least those times she been either close to unconsciousness or numb.
Not so this time. She was completely alert. Every nerve ending totally open for all the pain. It was then she realized that the death of a dream could hurt almost as much as a physical death.
A small voice in her head, barely heard over the howling rage and grief of her heart, asked her if she was really that surprised?
Did you really think you could satisfy him forever? That plain, old, monogamous sex would keep him happy? That a man whose senses were a hundred times more aware than yours would be content with soft touches and whispered ‘I love you’s’?! Are you really that surprised?!
She guessed she shouldn’t have been, but she was. Oh not at the fact that he wanted sex with someone else. He was a man after all. But rather at the fact that had lost respect for her. He might be a total shit with others, but with a few exceptions, he had always been straight with her. Never given her a reason not to trust him. Always sure that he would let her know if something was wrong.
All the times he had said that she didn’t know the real him flashed across her mind. She hadn’t believed him. Now she did.
She was fiercely aware that he wasn’t trying to bullshit his way out of it. She didn’t think she could’ve taken it. As it was she wanted to beat the crap out of him. But the four hours of tears had left her physically and mentally exhausted. It took an effort to raise her voice much less her fist. But she had to know. Who was so worth throwing away what she and Riddick had worked so hard to build?
“Who is she?”
It took him a few seconds to answer. He seemed aware that she was primed for the mother of all fights. Not that she didn’t deserve to open a can of whoop ass on him. Hell, if that was the worst she did to him he’d be ecstatic! He’d take whatever torture and punishment she could dish out as long as she didn’t throw him out of her life.
Finally turning to face her he answered her quietly. “Miri Lopresso. From work.”
“How long?” Her voice was rough and low. The evidence of her crying had left her face puffy and blotchy. He felt the stab of regret deep in his heart. It was almost like an old friend. It had taken up residence not thirty seconds after he had finished having sex with Miri.
“Three weeks.”
Zar searched his face for the veracity of his words. Less than a day ago she wouldn’t have doubted a single word that came out of his mouth. Now it was harder. But his milky eyes held hers steadily.
“So, while I thought you were out looking for Toni, worrying myself sick that Leffner would kill you, you were really fucking someone else. Did you ever really look at all?”
“You know I did Zar!”
“No...I don’t know. The disk tells me you weren’t.”
Tiredly Richard ran his hand over his shorn head. It was going to be a long night. She was going to put him through hell. But if torturing him kept her from ending their life together then he’d gladly go through it. She deserved answers. Even if it meant confronting his own stupidity and gullibility. He felt as if Miri had led him around by the dick. And he had followed like a puppy. Richard Riddick was not used to being the one skull fucked. He didn’t like the feeling.
“It was one time only. You probably don’t believe me, but it’s the truth. Only one time and only with her. You know she set me up don’t you?”
“Yeah, I know it was a trap.”
He didn’t like the look that was growing in her eyes. A cold numbness. She wasn’t kicking him out physically, probably because of her sense of fair play concerning the trap and Audrey. But she was shutting herself off from him emotionally. A deep part of him told him not to let that happen. She had done it to survive when Brenner had attacked her and killed her family. It had taken years and Brenner reappearing for her to open herself back up again. He had to get her to let loose. Let out all the hurt and anger.
It meant ticking her off royally. Even more than she already was.
Grabbing her by the arm he headed for their bedroom.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!”
“Audrey and the baby are sleeping. You want to wake them up when you start caterwauling? It’s better if we do this in our bedroom.”
Zar eyes blazed at the both the rough handling and the outrageous words.
“There is no our bedroom anymore Riddick! You’re sleeping in Toni’s room! You lost the right to my bed when you decided Miri Lopresso had a better one.”
She tried to drag her feet, but he relentlessly pulled her along. Only the knowledge that she would wake Audrey and Hill kept her from getting loud.
Finally they were in the bedroom and the door whooshed closed behind them.
Riddick still had hold of her arm while staring at her expectantly.
“What?! You expect me to the good little girl and just forget about what you did? To let you touch me and sleep with me?! I’m supposed to act like it was no big thing that you lied to me? That you screwed another woman? That you disrespected me? Fuck you!’”
She tried to wrench her arm free from his hold, but he wasn’t budging.
“Let me go!” Still he just stood there. Imprisoning her easily as he watched her struggle to get free.
The pain washing over her made her struggle harder. She just wanted to be alone to lick her wounds. To work at bringing up the wall that would shield her from the agony of his betrayal. Make her numb.
But as she fought uselessly against his bruising grip the anger started to win. Everything she had been holding back came bubbling up like vomit. It was coming and there was nothing she could do to stop it.
Her free hand smacked him across the face. Whipping his head around and leaving a bright read hand print marring his skin. She was amazed at how good it felt!
So she did it again.
And again.
Soon she was sobbing and hitting. Punching him in his chest, neck and face. Anywhere she could inflict pain. Never noticing that she was hitting with both fists soon after the maelstrom began. He had released her other hand. Giving her the freedom to reign all the anger and pain down on his unresisting body. Letting the minor pain of her blows ease some of the guilt.
He watched carefully for the signs that she was tiring herself out. Soon the sobs turned to wheezing breaths and the punches came less and less. Turning into exhausted, pitiful slaps. She had reached the end.
Her knees buckled and she would have hit the floor hard if he hadn’t caught her and lowered himself down with her. Enfolding her in his arms as he leaned his back up against the side of the bed. Whispering words of atonement and apology. But not promises. He himself didn’t trust his promises. Rocking her gently. Trying to absorb the pain and rage.
Her body slowly relaxed against his and he knew she slept the slumber of the traumatized. But he didn’t let her go. Just continued to hold her and rock her softly. Remembering a night over a year ago much like this one where he had held her on this floor as she poured out the puss that was her anguish. Only her grief had not been caused by him then.
They had made love for the first time after that night. The beginning of his redemption in his own soul. After what happened with Miri, he wondered if he would ever be redeemed in Zar’s eyes again. Or if he had permanently screwed it up. Losing the one of the people in his life that made him, at least partially, a good man. Throwing away the normal life that had been his. How many second chances did a killer get?
He had a hard time picturing a life without Zar’s love and friendship. If she couldn’t forgive him and let their relationship get back to pre-Miri days, then maybe it would be better if he left. Living with her mistrust and lack of forgiveness would be a hundred times worse than not living with her all.
He saw now that Miri had been lying in wait for him that very first night he’d gone looking for Toni and Leffner. She had appeared around the corner right before the corridor leading to Leffner’s rat hole. She hadn’t said a word. Just came up to him and touched the side of his face. Letting her scent, with it’s ability to arouse him painfully, do the work of seducing him. Taking him by the hand and leading him back to her rooms.
All thoughts of Toni and Leffner had been wiped from his mind. Zar had become only a niggling little speck. One that had been pushed way down deep under the onslaught of Miri’s determination. The only thing that existed were her luscious mouth and sweet body. And his need to be inside of her. It was as if she had flipped some switch in his brain. A switch that let him think only with his dick.
Their coupling had been hot and fast. None of the soft touches and murmured love words he shared with his sessions with Zar. It had been intense in a way much different than what he had become used to. More than just casual sex, but yet satisfying empty of emotions. The only thing that existed was the physical drive to copulate with Miri. To release the burning hot current that ran through his body directly to his groin. He hadn’t even thought twice about it when he had sunk deeply into her warmth. It had only been after that reality had taken hold. As if the switch had been flipped off from the “on” setting.
He gotten up without a word, dressed and resumed his search for Leffner. He hadn’t even said goodbye. Not that she seemed to want even that much verbal interaction with him. It had been all about the sex for her. He hadn’t seen her since. His foreman told him that she quit the next day.
Why the hell had he done it?! It was just a piece of pussy for hell’s sake! Nothing he hadn’t been offered dozens of times since he’d been with Zar. What had made Miri so easy to fall victim too? Why had all his hard won instincts taken a nap when ever she was around? Why did the memory of doing her, far from arousing him, now leave the taste of ashes in his mouth?
As he sat on the cold floor holding the woman he loved more than life itself, he asked the biggest question of all. The question that made his brain scream in well honed warning.
What was really behind Miri Lopresso’s seduction?