We e Half Way There: Episode Six: We Gather Together
By Bryant Mclemore
SCENE ONE
INT. UCINDA FLORAL SHOPPE AY
The Shoppe is heavily decorated with Thanksgiving themes, MARIE
completes a customer transactions.
MARIE
Of course, gobble, gobble...ciao!
Smiling
MARIE
Hope you choke on a gobble, gobble bone,
bitch!
LEAH enters
LEAH
Sweet sentiment about the customers, eh?
MARIE
Tell ya if I have to hear one more thing about this
God Damn holiday
LEAH
Now, Ms. Anne Marie, how can you not love it?
MARIE
Like this!
Flips her
LEAH
It a time of getting together with your family eating,
football, most importantly no gifts..
MARIE
It the spawn of Satan!
LEAH
It only two damn days!
MARIE
Enough time for me, the spawn of Satan!
LEAH
Come on, now Marie, even you have to like
something out of it!
MARIE
Nada! Thanksgiving begets Christmas shopping ,
Christmas Shopping and shoppers begets Christmas,
corny cookie and candy begets, those cheesy carols
and finally Christmas hell and New Year hangover
the spawn of Satan!
Assorting items
LEAH
Isn the hangover deal right up your alley?
Besides as always, your making an ant hill
out of a mountain, sweetie!
Following her
MARIE
As always, Mother Teresa, you e trying to conquer a
mountain that way too high and as every holiday,
you know you not even pass the valley hang it up!
LEAH
That not the point
MARIE
Regardless, it ain happening!
Walks to the other side of the register
LEAH
Oh, well
SCOTT and TAMI enter, SCOTT carries a huge, flower ade,
turkey centerpiece!
Supervising in front of him
TAMI
Yea eah ot there!
He struggles trying to get it in
SCOTT
Hurry, my arm are tired!
TAMI
You e close
SCOTT
Lovely, now how close is what I wanna here!
TAMI
To the left a little atch it!
SCOTT
I about to drop this thing anywhere and you
can decide what to do
TAMI
Thought you could handle it! Fine, just
put on this table.
Signals LEAH to move paper and items, she removes, and he drops it.
TAMI
Be good for now..
SCOTT
Aren you forgetting something..
TAMI
I thought you said you do it for free!
SCOTT
No!
TAMI
What else then!
LEAH
Think he means, THANK YOU!
TAMI
Oh, he knows I appreciate it!
SCOTT
You better, shit! f I could handle it! , you try
carrying 25 lbs of lust vegetation in which half,
I think, I allergic to, if not now I am!
Resting his hand on the side
LEAH
We thank you!
Kisses him
SCOTT
Well, let me get on back, I have to finish off
the menu for tomorrow, you know the next
day is the big one!
LEAH
Yeah, must be hell for you! I mean, doin all
those dinners
SCOTT
Not really, I use to it on a regular basis, and plus
there won be that many people anyways.. all going
home for the holiday deal?
LEAH
It must be difficult to not be with your family during the
Holidays!
SCOTT
Gotta deal with someday! Beside with the size of my
family, it a holiday in itself.
LEAH
I hope you e going to contact them!
SCOTT
Nah, I just gonna wait until they die, of course
I will!
TAMI
I don worry about it, just sent them a card and be
threw with it!
LEAH
How thoughtful of you!
TAMI
They don need to hear from me LEAH
I wonder who give you that influence
MARIE
Ok since we e going about families let hear about
what you and the wife will be going, your daddy
or the lovely in-laws?
LEAH
We e decided to stay home, don want to disturb
Anyone
MARIE
Some much for food, football, and family
LEAH
But that doesn mean I don think about and besides
I already have a family here
MARIE
Dear God, I think I gonna pewk!
LEAH
That ok I know you love and deep inside you
are crazy about the holidays
MARIE
Yeah, enough to run to Canada!
SCOTT
What in Canada ?
MARIE
No Thanksgivings!
SCOTT
I thought they have it too!
MARIE
It already over with !
LEAH
Still, you have deal with Christmas up there
and I think they also have Boxer day
MARIE
That in December, a month away y that
time I l be long home!
LEAH
So when are you gonna make this fateful trip?
MARIE
Never!
SCOTT
You e just talking shit!
TAMI
Of course, she wouldn leave me here
MARIE
Wanna bet, you have you amily and your boyfriend
TAMI
Ha, haaa! I told you were just friends
MARIE
After the hissy fits and then making friendly
TAMI
Not fair
interrupts
SCOTT
So, what your family about, Marie?
MARIE
I have one and unfortunately their alive
SCOTT
I can get that
MARIE
That all you need to get! Get it!
LEAH
You have to excuse her, Scotty, as you can see she Marie.
MARIE
Can be anybody else.
SCOTT
Yeah, yeah, I gotta split shit load of things to do, later!
LEAH and TAMI
Ok! Bye, Scotty !
Waves
MARIE
Don get into any trouble without me!
He leaves
MARIE
Sweet kid, need to find him a girlfriend!
TAMI
Uh, honey! I don think he needs one
MARIE
You have to love her!
LEAH
I don think she mean that, pumpkin! Though I do
MARIE
Think before you start, Girl Scout!
LEAH
Well at least consider it, Annie.
She walks back.
SCENE ENDS
SCENE TWO
INT. DINNING AREA--DAY
Along with a few guest; GARY, NIKKI, and CARLA sits
around drinking coffee.
NIKKI
Thank god for the Thanksgiving holidays, my only
off time!
GARY
Don you have Christmas and New Years?
CARLA
Huh, don we wish!
NIKKI
This is the only day I don have to see tired assholes
coming or going bothering me about stall food flat-ass
or drinks nor my bouncing fools out, they are at home
CARLA
Unfortunately, that is my job everyday, but not this
time.
GARY
So we include you guys in the traditional din-din?
NIKKI
Oh, baby, this is a rare occasion for us
Put her arm around her
CARLA
Oh, yeah it turkey and stuffing for two
NIKKI
And that sweet potato souffl of yours?
CARLA
With whipped cr e!
NIKKI
And a nice cherries on the top?
CARLA
MmHmm!
They kiss
GARY
So it safe to count you out!
CARLA
I know you were looking forward for us to do this
GARY
It cool. Although, it is a rare occasion to have
Thanksgiving Dinner together since we e haven
for over five years as a family!
NIKKI
What can we say, Gar things change. Besides,
since we e about to embark our own little family
I think it time for us to have a private little get
together of our own.
GARY
That is true, but seeing that Tony here, and Scott
who is probably gonna go all out..
NIKKI
I know but you have understand this is our one out of
a million chance for together time
CARLA
Sorry baby, but I l save you some of my
sweet potato souffl
GARY
Ahh, no thanks! I think you guys may have better
use for it besides having Scotty here making our
dinner probably be enough for Christmas and next
thanksgiving!
NIKKI
You know we be there
GARY
You have fun, don do anything without a net
ANTHONY enters
GARY
Hey! What do you know
ANTHONY
Your sister wired on something, right?
GARY
Took you that long to figure out
ANTHONY
Why didn we go to LA, New York, or Beirut even
CARLA
Why with the sudden relocation, gig?
NIKKI
What has she done to get you wired?
ANTHONY
Everything !
NIKKI
What ever it is, it for the best!
ANTHONY
Ha, you wanna bet!
NIKKI
It not enough to do anything drastic.
ANTHONY
Uh, you have know idea who you e messing with!
GARY
Well, Dana does have her.. quirks, but it not worth
loosing your head!
ANTHONY
Not after you hear what her last expose is!
GARY
Ah, Tony, I live it for the last, thirty plus years
nothing could surprise me about her
ANTHONY
Great! Then you won be surprise when big sis
comes tomorrow!
GARY
She coming here?!
ANTHONY
That what I said.
GARY
For what nd why did you tell her you e here!
ANTHONY
Thought you didn mind Uncle Gary?
Sarcastic
GARY
Does it look like I don ! Don want that bitch
here!
NIKKI
Never surprised, huh !
GARY
This is not surprised
ANTHONY
Stupidity maybe!
GARY
No Tony, stupidity is telling your obsessive compulsive
stepmother your whereabouts
stands up
CARLA
Take it easy Gary
NIKKI
Yeah, she is the boy stepmother
GARY
And my sister! I have every right and reason for to
say my two cents hirty-some years of
ANTHONY
Passive-aggressive remarks?
GARY
And free suggestion breathing down my Goddamn neck
ANTHONY
To say the least
CARLA
Damn, hate to be her now!
GARY
She not the one to worry about!
CARLA
Yep yawl look like you need some Prozac
ANTHONY
Need for her to disappear!
DAVID enters
DAVID
Ooo, look like someone kick y ll asses!
ANTHONY
About to!
NIKKI
Your ister-in-law is the talk of Atlanta, particularly
Aragon way.
DAVID
Lettin her work you, ain she hundreds miles away.
CARLA
Not after tomorrow, baby!
NIKKI
She planning reservation at Mrs. Bailey Bed and
Breakfast with Mr. Anthony Fox and Gary Rhennes!
DAVID
Cute! I finally get to meet y sister in-law I was could
wear that cute little number I bought and talk about girl
stuff finally without all these mens and dykes No offense
y ll, I still love you ut I need a woman model
GARY
Uhhh, You might wanna take back that thought
DAVID
Why ?
GARY
She knows nothing about you
DAVID
Now don play with outside of the bed!
GARY
Wish I were
DAVID
How and why did you manage to do that Mr. Rhennes!
And do not tell me it slipped your mind!
GARY
You don know her like I do
ANTHONY
And want not to!
DAVID
Won have choice now! So what were you fens tell
her, I one of your extended guest?
GARY
More like neighbor
DAVID
All I do, this is how I repaid!
GARY
Like what!
DAVID
Do not get me start, now Already working my nerves!
At 3:00 in the afternoon
CARLA
Whoa! Thank you Jesus we won be here!
Hugging NIKKI
SCENE ENDS
SCENE THREE
INT.---CAF --NIGHT
At the main bar disgusted CARLA sit as NIKKI and JESSE work behind.
CARLA
Now why did that fool wait until the last minute to pull
that gotta go to California to get my kid bit.. and on the
day before!
NIKKI
Sweetheart, that your partner!
CARLA
No he isn , frank is mine!
JESSE
Why did you except it!
CARLA
I don know who are you and what are you doing
in an a and b conversation!
NIKKI
Honey don hit on my child like that, and he is right
you could have simply said no
CARLA
You don think I know that!
JESSE
It only one day
CARLA
The one day out of the year I can have with Suga-Nikka!
Ain got Christmas nor New Years and aren you suppose
to be making drink or something [mumbling]
JESSE
You and who else it empty, no one coming for good
awhile
CARLA
Why ain you with your kin since you wanna stick your
nose where it shouldn be.
JESSE
Don think my real family wanna see me now
CARLA
And we wonder why?
JESSE
Because like any red-blooded American family we
do not care for intimate interaction and yours?
Just give me a double, talk too much!
NIKKI
What are you planning to do tomorrow?
JESSE
What I do every other day, get up eat and sleep.
NIKKI
Hmm, don that seem kinda don know
CARLA
Nikki don get him started
NIKKI
He shouldn be deprived of
CARLA
Boy ain deprived of nothing He a grown damn man!
NIKKI
I know that sweetheart
JESSE
No she right I straight, Nikki. Why should I stop a
seven year tradition?
NIKKI
Cause you got family here and it time for you to start
I new tradition.
JESSE
I ok, seriously!
NIKKI
So am I. Ain got nothing to do tomorrow
plans thrown out!
CARLA
Now I know you ain gonna invite him to our house
NIKKI
Taking him to the B !
CARLA
Why, ain there enough shit going on already!
NIKKI
Like Gary and Tony acting a fool, that all nd
No bad blood with him there
CARLA
Ain you forgetting two other people who might ?
NIKKI
That all say and done with them, right!
CARLA
For one what about the other?
MARIE enters
NIKKI
Speak of the devil!
MARIE
In my presence!
NIKKI
Hey sugar, what the word?
MARIE
Sizzlers!
JESSE
Really guys I cool!
NIKKI
I insist, no demand your presence or else!
JESSE
Can turn down a proper black mail!
NIKKI
Great![to Marie] what your plan tomorrow, Marie
MARIE
My utopia is that it ends but I guess we gotta see
Gary and company eard you guys gotta hot
and heavy one planned
NIKKI
We do but, now plans have changed.
MARIE
Bummer!
Tension between JESSE and MARIE is grows
NIKKI
Since someone was nice enough to help a fellow
worker tomorrow.[sighs] It to the B
tomorrow and bringing a friend!
Pulling JESSE over
JESSE
Tried to bail
Shrugging his shoulders trying to ease her
MARIE
Should e tried harder!
Not amused picks up a peanut
JESSE[sarcastic]
But wouldn we be upset!
MARIE
Guess again!
NIKKI
So did you get in contact with your family?
MARIE
Why should I?
JESSE
They e obsessed with family for some reason.
MARIE
Really! Thank you for informing me, sir!
JESSE
Easy, trying to break bread
MARIE
Not working, pal. No and don plan to they need
a break and I need to break out, later!
Feels awkward and gets up
NIKKI
Think about it!
MARIE
Yes mother!
Leaving, as so CARLA snickers from behind
JESSE
Nice lady!
CARLA
This will be interesting, too bad I won be here
to see it!
Walking pass NIKKI
JESSE
This is the family I l eating with, Huh!
She places hand on him
SCENE ENDS
SCENE FOUR
INT. LOBBY---NIGHT
SCOTT lounges as ANTHONY vigorously vacuums and cleans the area. Sees SCOTT
lack of participation and
ANTHONY
You know you can do something ..
SCOTT
I am
ANTHONY
Pick up something work!
SCOTT
This is something and by the way it is already clean
He then sprays some pledge on the table
SCOTT
Did that too!
ANTHONY
You could do a better job Scotty!
SCOTT
I will if you beat
ANTHONY
Will you stop playing, I trying to get it right
SCOTT
It only Dana
Give him an angry expression
SCOTT
I should try to get her over here much often
ANTHONY
Scott!
SCOTT
I l clean the room in a minute, oh dictator!
ANTHONY rushes out, SCOTT laughs shaking his head, as he leaves, he bumps into DAVID.
DAVID
Ok, you e excused!
He goes to the desk draw, looking for his prescriptions.
ANGEL SHOT an empty draw with only a few papers
ANGEL BACK DAVID confused and frantic searches around the desk, mumbling to his self
ANGEL SHOT SCOTT hands his pills
ANGEL BACK DAVID gives a puzzled expression
SCOTT
Dropped them earlier in the kitchen,
He snatches them
SCOTT
May need them!
DAVID
Just to let you know they e not mine olding
it for someone
SCOTT
Also named David Newman?
DAVID
I had them put it in my name if you want to go
there!
SCOTT
Go where, I just handed it to back!
DAVID
I know, thank you!
Walking out
SCOTT
You e welcome!
Goes back to the couch
SCENE ENDS
SCENE FIVE
INT. INNING AREA B ---NEXT DAY
MARIE, TAMI, LEAH and GREG sits while watching DAVID, GARY and ANTHONY hastily prep everything.
GARYv/o
Ouch! Watch it will ya!
MARIE
I haven had such a huge laugh since watching
Three stooges last night!
GREG
Thee one problem who Curly and who Moe?
MARIE
Don know, want to say Gary is Moe but then
sometimes Tony gets a little gitty
GARYv/o
Ya quit horseplayin and finish cleaning that
damn table so we can move this god damn thing!
DAVIDv/o
First of all, I don horseplay and secondly didn
y lls move this thing like five times!
GARYv/o
Just making sure!
DAVIDv/o
She is just visiting for a day or two, ain stayin
forever!
ANTHONYv/o
Doesn make a difference, come on!
DAVIDv/o
Uh, come on what!
GARYv/o
Clean !
LEAH
No, no Tony is more of curly Gary is like, Moe and Davy is
Larry r is it Tony is Larry?
MARIE
Whoever this is great better than any corny Thanksgiving
parade
GREG
You have to give Atlanta that, we may not have the Macy
float but we aren short in slap stick
TAMI
Now which one is the guy with the big eye brows and
thick glasses and that cigar?
LEAH
Uh, Wrong person genius!
GREG
Somebody slept through the quiz.
TAMI
Don like no old movies!
MARIE
Gotta love her, she doesn know a classic when
it hits her but she tries!
LEAH
So why aren you helping out your buddy out there
maybe be the fourth one what his name?
MARIE
Curly Joe?
GARYv/o
Watch it don leave that there, looks tacky!
DAVIDv/o
Honey here there whatever it a fuckin coffee she
ain paying no mind! But what do I know, I don
live here just a neighbor!
ANTHONYv/o
Will both of you stop and l finish!
DAVIDv/o
Don have to tell me, not the maid!
GARYv/o
Yes you are!
DAVIDv/o
I am a host, well was the host!
ANTHONYv/o
Knock it off!
LEAH
No, the other one, with hair?
MARIE
Fuck if I know I only know Larry, Moe and Curly ,
Curly Joe.
TAMI
Harpo!
Everyone stares at her
TAMI
He had hair!
GREG
Anyway I don want to ruin their good time, besides
isn Scotty the stooge with hair?
MARIE
Or at least Curly Joe.
DAVID stops participating and joins them
DAVID
Now who are we calling Joey?
Uh, no one in particular, Larry.
LEAH
No, no Curly.
DAVID
While y lls havin a hoot think this is Saturday morning
programmin we could e had some assistance here
not use to all this labor!
To GREG
DAVID
Why don your wife proud and let her and me see
those muscles at work
GREG
No deal kid, came for the food and mm,
entertainment!
DAVID
Then why don amazons help m!
LEAH
Nope, one day a week without lifting with my
shoulders is enough.
TAMI
You know not to ask me!
LEAH
Sweetie just because you strike a pose and hold a
fucking book on your head, doesn mean you can
lift nor clean! You do it all day!
DAVID
You go bitch, and I the originally it girl can do
it all!
MARIE
Including bullshit?
DAVID
Ah, She-ra shant say a thing!
MARIE
Whatever!
DAVID
That right, now when is this boy coming back with
this woman so we could get this shit over! And I don
see what the fuss is all about! It only his damn sister,
what she is gonna do!
GREG
Still uptight about the arrangement!
DAVID
Down start with me, mamma boy all the painful I e
given up for that man!
LEAH
Leave my baby alone, just because you guys can
handle a simple visit doesn mean you have to put
it out on everyone!
GREG
Like you did with my mother, huh?
LEAH
Shut you up mamma boy! Your mother was
the devil, ok!
MARIE
All parents are nightmares!
LEAH
That why you e not calling yours!
GREG
Stop giving her grief, if she don wanna call she!
doesn wanna call!
DAVID
Mine was sweet, called me her little prince!
TAMI
But got a princess!
DAVID
Ain that the truth! Too bad some people never did
take notice!
To GARY, sarcastic
GARY v/o
I said I was sorry, you spoiled bitch!
DAVID
Somebody hold me before I will become a grieving
convicted widow!
SCOTT enters with some bags and DANA FOX, ANTHONY
stepmother and GARY sister
DAVID [mumbles]
Ding dong the bitch is here!
Embraces her
DAVID
We e been expecting you ey!
DANA
Uh, hello
GARY and ANTHONY take notice
DAVID
Uh, I sorry avid, the lose and soon
to be ex friend of Gary!
to GARY
DANA
Ah, lived on my expectations of you, nice have
met you.
DAVID
Unfortunately, you haven heard it all..
GARY to DAVID and DANA
GARY
Uh, that enough Davo buddy now let the nice
woman breathe, k?
Pushes him aside and embraces her
GARY
Hi ya sis!
DANA
Hey kiddo hope I didn interrupt anything
GARY
Nonsense, we e just fiddlin around you know..
maintenance, the holidays all
DANA
That great for a minute there I thought you
were making a big fuss over me and you know
I don really need that
GARY
Please sis, you l settle for simple just routine
work, we do it all the time!
DAVID and SCOTT smiles
DANA
Well that [to David] Ya know, he wasn as
meticulous growing up.. I can tell you the
chemistry set and the hamster
DAVID
Umm, I like to hear more of this
Everyone except ANTHONY snickers
GARY
Umm, Davy old pal, don have stuff to do at
your place?
Hinting him
DAVID
No, I listening sounds like game we e played
Continues with DANA
GARY
Thought it was important, amigo!
Stressing his hint
DAVID
Not as important as
MARIE
I think he wants you to leave!
DAVID
I know sweetheart I just want him to remind
me sir of where I stay?
MARIE
You don know where I stay?
DAVID
No I do smartass, just trying to see if he was
paying attention !
DANA
To what?
DAVID
Little old pet game me and my chum usually
plays though I usually let m win and
GARY
David!
DAVID
Ok, ok
Walking backward to door
DAVID
Don I need my keys!
Hold out his to him
GARY
What keys?
DANA
Why would he have your keys?
DAVID
Silly boy, You remember me leaving m here
after that night you try to some thing like that
hamster thang your sister was telling me about
GARY
I think I know where they are
To MARIE
GARY[ in her ear]
I have a hundred dollars if you can work
with me here..
Hands her some money
MARIE
You left them with me, Silly boy
Giving her keys to DAVID
MARIE [in his ear]
Touch and break any of my dildos you l die
a young girl.
DAVID [in her ear]
Really, what would I want with infected and
outdated items? I have taste!
Pick her
DAVID
Ta, ta!
He leaves. She go to GARY
MARIE [in his ear]
You know you e about to be a widow, Gary!
GARY[ in her ear]
It only for tonight
MARIE [in his ear]
That l be fifty extras you know
GARY
Yeah, I know, I know, I know ow sit down
and be a good little girl!
Shoves her back
GARY
Married folks!
To DANA
Puzzled
DANA
Ah, I don think they seem like the marrying type.
Puts arm around shoulder
GARY
You be surprised what Mother Nature matches
up, sis!
DANA
And forgotten about a marvelous guy
He blushes thinking of some xcuse
DANA
Or should I say guys! And how is my
step-son, anyways?
Gestures @ ANTHONY who smirks back!
GARY
As you could see, he alive and kicking!
DANA
Great, thought he be a hand full
SCOTT
You can say that again!
GARY
Nonsense veryone fine just us swinging
bachelors!
DANA
Oh, Scotty, didn I mention you e parents!
SCOTT
For good reason, I hope..
DANA
Gotcha! Still bad blood, huh?
SCOTT
Let not go there here do you want these!
GARY
Hold on a sec
SCOTT
I e been doing that for the last thirty-some
minutes!
GARY
The room next to mine, then..
SCOTT
Great!
Waiting for the keys
GARY
What.. [getting the hint]just go to the desk
SCOTT
Where David ?
GARY
At home, now go get the keys!
SCOTT
Ok, ok your highness!
Goes to desk then to ANTHONY
SCOTT
You at least put the turkey in the oven?
ANTHONY
Uh, no cookie!
SCOTT
Tony, I asked you to do that four hours ago
ANTHONY
No you didn you said, you were gonna do it
SCOTT
Ah, wrong! I distinctly remember you saying will
remember to do it
ANTHONY
Ah, no you e wrong.. in fact it was David that
was suppose to do it! I distinctly remember that!
SCOTT
You really got it mixed up, I would trust David
near cereal Remembering
ANTHONY
But I did, Oosp!
SCOTT
Oosp! Do you know how long it takes to cook
a bird like that
ANTHONY
What an hour, thirty minutes
SCOTT
Try four hours!
ANTHONY
Three to four hours..
SCOTT
Um, dinner is suppose to be ready like thirty
minute from now
ANTHONY
Where David, he is suppose to have put it in
SCOTT
He at home.. wherever the hell that is!
ANTHONY
Marie place, I think
SCOTT
You think?
ANTHONY
Relax, it just a fucking bird!
GARY
Hey! What the problem?
ANTHONY and SCOTT
Nothing!
GARY
Why aren her stuff room?
SCOTT
I l get in just getting some added details for
dinner today!
GARY
What added details?
ANTHONY
A few minor changes!
DANA
You e cooking I see!
ANTHONY
Yep, that is he cooking
Points to SCOTT
DANA
Ooo, I forgot you can cook, then I l definitely
look forward to this.
GARY
As soon as he gets your stuff out of the way
SCOTT
Gotcha, man!
Goes to on [both mouthing]
ANTHONY
[I l call m!]
SCOTT
[No! I l call him!]
He leaves. DANA looks around, impressed.
DANA
Too bad little bro, in fact, I very proud you!
GARY
Learned from the best!
ANTHONY goes to them
DANA
Of course, and to think I thought you handle
anything outside of sports and girls
ANTHONY
A lot has changed !
DANA
As for you , and I thought this would another
little phase be, but you also impressed me, not
bad!
Sees the wondering band or friends
DANA
These are the guess!
GARY
No more like loiterers o, these are just some
of the people I know.
Signals them over, GREG being the first to come
GARY
I think you met him before reg my business
partner..
DANA
Oh, hi, yet another example of your dualism
abilities, here and that finance office..
GARY
All in a days work!
GREG
Not without me, partner!
They laugh, LEAH interrupts.
LEAH
Nor I, hey Mrs. Rhennes DANA
Was Mrs. Butler, now Fox
Greet her
GREG
Yeah, this is my fianc Leah.
LEAH
Marie and I run a florist shop down the street,
you e met her
DANA
David wife?
MARIE
Yes, my soon to be Ex-husband.
Not as enthusiastic
DANA
Now you don mean that, honey ?
TAMI
Yes she does, even though I think they love each
other more! Hi I Tamara Martinez, or just plan
call me Tami!
DANA
And you are
TAMI
Good friend to all specially Annie and
company!
MARIE
Soon to be ex one at that!
DANA
Oh my why so many loses, will I shouldn
complain after three husbands now my fourth!
She laughs, MARIE accompanies her superficially
Joining in
GARY
So, Tony did Scott mention when dinner is
gonna be ready?
ANTHONY
Ah yeah soon.. I think let me check on that
He goes to check , as does DANA come around nspecting the place
more.
Checking the patterns on the sofa
DANA[condescending]
Now you didn listen to me here Gary, remember
I e said that bright colors bring more and better
attention!
GARY
Yeah but I didn necessarily pick it out..
DANA
Oh don mind me twerp, I just making my
usual improvement advice, there always room
for it!
he smirk as she continues inspecting
DANA
So this is it!
GARY
[to himself] I hope so to what sis?
DANA
Your friends, didn you say you have a someone
in the law enforcement and restaurant business?
GARY
Them! oh, I think they e having a rivate dinner together!
NIKKI and JESSE enters, everyone pauses.
NIKKI
Well, hello, hello one and all!
Slight relief
GARY
Ms. Nicholette Patterson , nice of you to drop?
NIKKI
Thank you Mr. Rhennes, will since the other half
is on duty, Thought I spend time with my amily
instead of alone, brought a friend and my famous
curry goat stuffing !
JESSE
Brought my home-made canned cranberry jelly?
JESSE waves it, tension with MARIE towards JESSE grows.
GARY
Nice, more the merrier, I say!
Greet her and him
NIKKI
Let get this thing started!
Both step down, everyone greets her and, reluctantly, him.
[idle conversation proceeds ]
DANA [ to GARY]
For a moment I would e thought he was the cop
companion of hers!
GARY
No! he works with her, I guess Jason or Jesse,
I think.. new guy in town, huh?
DANA
Thought he was pretty young for her!
GARY
Amongst other things!
JESSE greets TAMI. Seeing this, MARIE freezes with anger and jealousy.
He reluctantly goes to her.
JESSE
See they made you a prisoner here, too.
She pauses, TAMI with a concerning looks smiles.
TAMI
Not so many familiar face though
They laugh, MARIE stands emotionless
MARIE
Yeah, pulled my leg!
Walks out
TAMI
And where are you going!
MARIE
See my husband and calling my folks!
Leaves
JESSE
At least she look at me, her husband?
TAMI
I l explain later
[dissolving in the group discussion ]
SCENE ENDS
SCENE FIVE
INT. KITCHEN--DAY
SCOTT checks the oven, turkey not closer to warm. Baffled, he
then see the oven range is off. Holds his hand over his face, furious
and hasty. GARY comes through
GARY
Hah, ha eed a break! Scotty tell me that this is some
horrid dream..
SCOTT
For who..
Getting a soda out of the refrigerator
GARY
For me of course, did you see how she was back there
SCOTT
She seems the same old Mrs. Butler-Fox to me
GARY
Not cool! Starts out like that, then did you see her
arranging my arrangements nd then the gesture
SCOTT
Probably nothing.
GARY
No, that Dana talk for I don like this
SCOTT
Geez man, why don you just tell her the real
deal! Wasn it you that convinced me of coming
out?
GARY
Thais different and not as easy as you think
it seems
SCOTT
You e not kidding, why I not having cooking
at home, back there I was lucky to enough make
water!
GARY
Excellent!
SCOTT
Uh huh!
GARY
Excellent, right?
SCOTT
Ah, yeah it , uh, there!
GARY
That how thanksgiving cooking is huh?
SCOTT smiles outwardly
GARY
Hmm, that why we usually buy it already-made
from the store ut I bet yours is more moist than
those awful ones, glad to depend on you this year!
Continues smiles as GARY leaves,
SCOTT
If you only knew.
SCENE SIX
INT.--LOBBY---DAYTIME
ANTHONY from the side line watches as everyone continues.
SCOTT tugs his sleeve.
SCOTT
We e in deep shit!
ANTHONY
Why? She not bothering us, yet.
SCOTT
I not talking about that, dumbass!
ANTHONY
The food thing! He didn ?
SCOTT
Yes, shithead! Now what am I gonna do in less
twenty minute twelve hungry including your step
mother when only thing I have is side items?
ANTHONY
Put out what you have and call it a day.
SCOTT
On Thanksgiving, think, man!
ANTHONY
Why are you making a big deal out of this?
SCOTT
Because am relied with the main course... I not
gonna let anyone down with this, especially for you
know who
Points to DANA
ANTHONY
If you ask me, you should look at yourself for this
SCOTT
Excuse me!
ANTHONY
You didn make enough, plus what about you
checked it yourself instead of depending on anyone
else especially at
SCOTT
How could I e checked if I picking up your step
mother
ANTHONY
Why can't you just go to the store and pick one
up?
SCOTT
What store is open on Thanksgiving ,Tony?
ANTHONY
Don have to remind me there something open
SCOTT
I other things to do here, Tony, I don have time
all over just for a damn turkey
ANTHONY
I can't do anything with it either, remember, Dana?!
I don see why you e making a big deal of this
Waves @ DANA
SCOTT
Don get me started on you
DANA comes over
DANA
And how are my two boys, or should I say
young men doing?
ANTHONY
Fine, Dee..
SCOTT
Never been better!
DANA
Splendid! And you do parents proud, Scotty, are you
going to school here ou can learn from this young
man here, Tony! He has one foot on the ground
Also making thanksgiving dinner, I hear?
Grabs ANTHONY
SCOTT
Yes ma m
DANA
You really should take on responsibilities like that!
Betcha he laying in bed all day not working, huh..
what to do with you..
ANTHONY sneers
.
SCOTT
Actually he
She interrupts
DANA
Hmm, can't wait to taste that turkey of yours,
Scotty nd when is it gone be ready?
ANTHONY
Yeah, how long, remodel!
SCOTT
Soon!
Rolling his eye at him
DANA
I sure hope so I know it gonna turn out great!
SCOTT
Let me go and check, Tony would you like to
help me out?
Hints, but offended he sneer at him
ANTHONY
No you have one foot on the ground, and me,
stranded in midair..
SCOTT
Really you need the responsibility!
Grabs his arm and dragging him out
DANA
Do you a lot of good!
In a condescending manner
SCOTT
Sure will! And me too..
They go into the kitchen
SCENE ENDS
SCENE SEVEN
INT.---MARIE'S LOFT---DAYTIME
MARIE walks in , sees her apartment totaled, radio left on, and
Her dildo buzzing in the background. DAVID sits on the sofa
watching the parade on TV eating chips and making rude com-
ments
Gripping on a paper she picks up, she bites her tongue.
MARIE
The hell is this!
DAVID
Your apartment, I believe!
Throwing the paper down
MARIE
Mommy forgot to teach you house etiquette!
Searches her place
DAVID
We are married right! So, if I gonna stay here
with y ll I gonna make it more comfy, honey!
Finds her dildo
MARIE
When that woman leaves hought you said
you weren touching my shit!
Gets her dildo , that continues to buzz
DAVID
I not gonna sit here bored to tears
Turns it off
MARIE
Now I have to disinfect all of this ary
DAVID
Ask me, I made it better, beside I shocked you
have to use plastic aide to gratify your sex lives!
MARIE
Personal toys! Gary, that another hundred bucks!
DAVID
Aren you suppose to be eating and festive with
my soon to be ex and his sister?
MARIE
If I were so lucky ith the exception of now, had
an unpleasant visitor so I calling my folks!
Picks up the phone, and dials
DAVID
So a glance in the got you calling!
Phone on shoulder
MARIE
Want to live to see tomorrow, princess
guess who?
Marie father picks up
MARIE'S FATHER v/o
Look what the trash man left us with
MARIE
Fine and how are you..
MARIE'S FATHER v/o
How do you think I should be, after years of nothing
from you?
MARIE
Only six years and three Christmas cards!
MARIE'S FATHER v/o
Three years ago?
MARIE
You know I alive
MARIE'S FATHER v/o
And you want something
MARIE
To say, [sighs] Happy Holidays?!
laughing sarcastically
MARIE'S FATHER v/o
This is a true riot! Debbie, your so-called oving daughter who never gave a shit at anytime is on
the saying appy holidays!
MARIE
You can at least be a father and say something
I like. oh, I don know love too sweet pea!
MARIE'S FATHER v/o
The way you returned the sentiments by leaving us
with that dyke friend Ramona, with no acknowledgements
or consideration, now you want to say hit me with
this said excuse of sympathy?! What do you take me
for?
MARIE
A parent I thought, can speak to mom?
MARIE'S FATHER v/o
She like me, doesn have time to deal with sleaze!
Why don you do both of us a favor and never contact
us again?
Hangs up
Holding her composure she grips the phone, then slowly hangs it up.
Keep silent, she continues picking up the space.
MARIE
Messy lil bitch, aren you, last time I let
you anything here!
DAVID
Told you before, Not all is me you damn lezzies
need to take some recognition !
MARIE
Whatever just watch TV, huh?
SCENE ENDS
SCENE EIGHT
EXT. ----HOUSING PROJECT-----DAYTIME
CARLA and her partner FRANK patrol the empty area.
FRANK
Man, what I give to be at home now!
CARLA
Don talk about home to me, Frankie, why in
hell name did I agree to this
FRANK
Easy for you to say my son mother has a restrain,
a restrain!
CARLA
She pick up sense
FRANK
Ha, ha Adams, she said I don pay child support,
freaking crack head!
CARLA
Woman has to have a habit!
FRANK
Dirty one her and her boyfriend
CARLA
Thank you!
FRANK
Christmas will be different, mark my word!
CARLA
Humph, you know right now my baby is having
a feast at Gary and I stuck here!
FRANK
What a big shing dig!
CARLA
Gary usually throws a dinner every year,
never missed one
FRANK
Till now
CARLA
Probably prepping for that turkey with all the
trimmings!
FRANK
Shit you e making hungry, please continue..
SCENE ENDS
SCENE NINE
INT.---B'N'B KITCHEN---DAYTIME
SCOTT paces while ANTHONY calmly sits on the cabinet.
ANTHONY
So what up genius ?
SCOTT
We need to buy a turkey!
ANTHONY
Smarter every minute!
SCOTT
Stop fucking around
ANTHONY
Didn you say every store is closed!
SCOTT
I didn say that, don putting words in my
mouth! aid that most stores are!
ANTHONY
So where are most stores that are open?
SCOTT
Do I look like I know!
GARY enters
GARY
Got Dana quiet for now, and everyone
GARY (CONT.)
mouth is watering, so where that bird..
Searching the pans
GARY
See everything but don see any bird how
it looking.
SCOTT
Bird?
GARY
The main course of this feast!
SCOTT
Yeah t l be ready soon, still have time!
GARY
I completely understand, just wanna see
how it looks Is that it there!
Points to the uncooked bird wrapped by the oven. About to open
it, but Anthony
ANTHONY
No!
GARY
It must be in the oven! I l just take a peak
Goes to the oven, SCOTT grabs him
SCOTT
No, Huh
Interrupts
ANTHONY
It not there either!
GARY
Then where is it!
SCOTT
Huh its, Ahh Hesitantly
ANTHONY
I took it outside!
SCOTT
Yeah, It outside?!
GARY
Outside, for what?
SCOTT
Yeah, for what, Tony?
ANTHONY
Don you remember me saying it was too hot!
His mother ole southern secret.
GARY
His mother?
ANTHONY
She makes the best!
SCOTT
Gotta trust dear ole mom!
GARY
I may not be from the south, but never
heard of that
ANTHONY
Keeps that fresh urkey taste
SCOTT
No, gritty oven after taste, should try it
GARY
Let get it out then!
Goes to the back door
ANTHONY
No!
Grabbing him
SCOTT
It has to reel in that fresh southern air for that
smoky taste?
GARY
Really new to me!
ANTHONY
Don you trust us uncle Gary?
GARY
Ok, the master at work, huh!
ing him
ANTHONY
And we should not disturb the master!
SCOTT
We l call you
GARY
But
Shoved out
Both blocking the door
ANTHONY
Now we e at step one
SCOTT
Shut up and call Davy!
SCENE ENDS
SCENE TEN
INT.---B'N'B LOBBY---DAYTIME
Everyone sits around waiting , along with JESSE stands while DANA, chatters on.
DANA
.you know you favor this young I knew
back in Chicago
JESSE
Whatever happened then, ma m, I was drunk and
used a condom.
DANA
Oh I got it!
JESSE
Cool jacket!
DANA
Touch on the ring !
JESSE
Oh, a gift from a pass good friend.
DANA
Christmases past ell, whoever they were
had good taste
Then glances at TAMI as she talk with the rest
JESSE
Yep, she did.
CUT TO: LEAH, GREG, NIKKI, and TAMI sitting on the couch
NIKKI
What taking him so long ?
TAMI
That right, I can eat the whole bird plus!
GREG
Wouldn that damage your figure and ruin
your career?
LEAH
With her stomach made of iron, which I hate
her for! Eat a tree and gain nothing
She then glances back at JESSE, both wave
GREG
You gain a pound just looking at a cheeseburger
LEAH
Which means what Greggy!
GREG
Nothing, babe ore loving in the oven!
NIKKI
Calling you fat, Lee baby!
LEAH
Not if he wants you to live!
GREG
No, no I wasn to TAMI]can you believe
them ganging up on me, huh!
TAMI continues staring inattentive
TAMI
Huh, yeah...but I still waiting for that bird!
NIKKI
So are we! Bet it off the hook, at usual!
GREG
For someone at eighteen he a regular Julia Childs!
I wish I married him!
LEAH
As opposed to..
GREG
No one, again, I stating on his accuracy, Hitler
SCENE ENDS
SCENE ELEVEN
INT.---B'N'B KITCHEN/MARIE'S LOFT---DAYTIME
SCOTT on the phone, as it rings, DAVID answers the phone.
DAVID[AT LOFT]
Anne Marie House of disorder, who beckons?
SCOTT[AT KITCHEN]
David, why did you forget to do what you
promise to do!
DAVID[AT LOFT]
Forget what?
SCOTT v/o
Forgot to start the turkey!
DAVID
Wasn my job, I don know how use this
thing, honey! Can't cook cereal, remember!
SCOTT v/o
Tony said you were you agreed to!
DAVID
Ah no! you were suppose do it!
SCOTT [AT KITCHEN]
Ah whatever the case, we e bird less!
DAVID v/o
And you want from me
SCOTT
I need something
DAVIDv/o
Make sandwiches!
SCOTT[AT KITCHEN]
No I need to find a store open and close,
quickly!
DAVID[LOFT]
Do I look like the yellow pages!
SCOTT v/o
I need not to answer that, but we need your
help, please!
DAVID pauses and sighs
SCOTT[AT KITCHEN]
I got the lobby and the rooms tonight and will
throw in Southern Comfort!
DAVID v/o
You e not old enough to buy , don worry,
mama coming with a bird!
SCOTT[AT KITCHEN]
Ah man, you don know how much I appreciate
this
DAVID
Just shut up and look pretty for your daddy!
SCOTT
Thanks!
Hangs up
DAVID
The things I do for my babies
Picks up his key, Then overhears muffled sobbing in the bathroom.
He sees MARIE cramped over crying by the sink.
Goes to comfort her
DAVID
Looks like someone did a number on you?
MARIE
Nothing, David
DAVID
Sounds more like something, it was your folks!
MARIE
For the last time, David!
DAVID
You ain fooling no one , especially me I knew
it was them!
MARIE
Don be stupid, they e just a little upset!
I Haven call them, all this time
DAVID
From your expression, I e seen ya at ya worst,
and lil upset, I don buy!
MARIE
Never listen to Leah, huh?
Starting crying again
DAVID
Baby, Baby! you know I always say there
silver lining in every cloud
MARIE
For Christ sake, not every one has the privileged
life mommy and daddy gave you, pretty boy!
Pulls away
DAVID
Before we can you there, not all glitter is gold,
believe me! So you shouldn have to slam me
your holidays is wrecked! I tell you it ain a
picnic for me
MARIE
Your boyfriend is hiding you from his sister,
isn much to being disowned all together!
Turns her back
DAVID
It is for me, you e not the only person who
haven heard from their family!
MARIE
Kidding me! Rich boy
wipes her eyes
DAVID
Yes, left my parents at sixteen never heard from
them since, but it doesn hurt me?
DAVID
Lived like a damn stiff porcelain doll in that
house! I had to leave, so I did tayed on the
streets, hungry and begging, not pretty for diva
like me!
MARIE
Now that is hard to see you as..
DAVID
Then I met Gary, hmm, he dusted me off then
made me his princess
MARIE
Thanks for turning my story into your fairy tale..
DAVID
Bitch, the point I making is nothing comes easy,
I not letting my ghost bring me down! I have
a second chance, new family, and by God grace,
ain looking back! You have Tami ,Gary, Nikki them
and your mama, and I sho ain leaving ya!
MARIE
Unfortunately!
DAVID
I l take that as a thank you, since I know there a
Human being in this hing !
Getting up
MARIE
Yeah whatever, babe!
Hugs her
DAVID
Come on and let go into town with mama
They get up
SCENE ENDS
SCENE TWELVE
EXT.----HOUSING PROJECT----DAYTIME
CARLA and FRANK continues patrolling by feet.
CARLA
Didn we repeat this before
FRANK
Yeah like three hours ago
CARLA
Humph, seems like three second ago
FRANK
Come on Adams don tell me you e bored
with this!
CARLA
A change would do me good.
FRANK
I l admit it ain the browns and the bears but it beats office or traffic duty
CARLA
At least I be home faster
Then a ruckus is heard a block off
FRANK
Well you may have to save that Carly looks like
we e getting something more exciting than the
Browns game!
CARLA
All I need!
They run towards the commotion
SCENE ENDS
SCENE THIRTEEN
INT.---B'N'B DINNING ROOM---DAYTIME
Everyone is seated in a rectangle table except ANTHONY,
and SCOTT who are in the kitchen waiting for DAVID.
To GARY
DANA
My, my this setting looks great!
GARY smiles
DANA
You know it would be better if you did it
buffet style, hmm?
GARY
Yeah, sis, but we decided on this!
DANA
We who?
GARY
We e! I always talk in second person.
DANA
Bad habit, you know.
interrupts
GREG[sitting across]
As worst as this wait?
LEAH
Enough interior design critique, where
the food?
ANTHONY walks out holding a few dishes, everyone expresses
their relief.
GARY
About time, let get that!
Helps him. Takes it out of his hand
GARY
So he has it inside, right?
ANTHONY
Uh, it hard to tell
GARY
How hard is it to tell, either its in or out!
ANTHONY
Still outside, I think
GARY
Why?
ANTHONY
Or in I l check
goes in the kitchen
SCENE FOURTEEN
INT.---B'N'B KITCHEN---DAYTIME
SCOTT still restless, hastily preps whatever is there. ANTHONY
walks back in to get some more dishes
ANTHONY
Hasn come in yet!
SCOTT [Sarcastic tone]
Is that right?!
ANTHONY
We e deeper shit, if he doesn show! Maybe
you e right, there isn any store open today!
SCOTT
Ya think?!
ANTHONY
We have to do something
SCOTT
Like what!
ANTHONY
The shit if I know, you have bunch of hungry
people and no main course running out of
excuses
SCOTT
That watcha get for not doing what you said
ANTHONY
I told you I was too busy nyway you asked
him to buy the turkey, so don blame it all
on me!
JESSE enters Looking through the dishes
JESSE
What cooking?
Also notices uncooked bird
JESSE
Or not!
JESSE
Ah, it a lot better when it cooked!
SCOTT
No shit! Now that to your number on fan!
JESSE
Aren you the cheerful chef!
SCOTT
Look man, don start with me...
JESSE
Dude, I was just trying to be nice!
SCOTT
Please don try!
ANTHONY
We e not really in the mood for anything, man!
We have a little dilemma here with the...turkey..
SCOTT
I asked to do a simple thing
ANTHONY
Yeah you did!
SCOTT
So you admit it!
ANTHONY
To shut you up, I didn ok!? Sorry don
Fucking hang me!
SCOTT
You won have to worry about that when everyone
Finds out there is no turkey........
ANTHONY
Hey, it wasn completely my fault!
Besides didn you ask David to get
another?
SCOTT
That not the point and you had to ask David!
JESSE
Ok, this is a little better than dinner @ home!
NIKKI enters
NIKKI
Seeing if I could help with anything, particularly
my curry goat stuffing!
Looks at the uncooked bird, and the expressions on their faces.
NIKKI
this is what we e gonna be eating...
JESSE
Yummy, raw and tasty!
SCOTT
Thank you smart ass why don you go back
And aggravate somebody girlfriend or
something!
JESSE
Don put it out on my because you e a
Lousy cook!
SCOTT
I can cook asshole, I just forgot to no
( Points to ANTHONY) This fool forgot to...
turn on the oven
ANTHONY
Told ya I was fucking busy...
NIKKI
Come y ll it just let Gary know what
happened he a reasonable guy , we all
fuck sometimes
SCOTT
That not the point , it the principal!
NIKKI
The bird isn cooked!
GARY enters, seeing his appearance SCOTT quickly hide the bird
GARY
It has to be done
Stalling him
SCOTT
It has to be at perfect timing, Southern
Tradition
GARY
Southern Tradition my ass, Which
is now
Pushing him out of the way. Opens the door DAVID and MARIE
stands holding a cooked turkey.
DAVID
Hey!
GARY
About time ou and this southern tradition!
Grabbing the turkey and leaves
DAVID
Shit even that turkey gets more attention
from than me!
Looks at MARIE
MARIE
What new!
DAVID
You better be glad I love you today...
SCOTT
You don know how much
Goes to greet him
DAVID
Oh hush, I told you nd southern tradition?
Walking him out
SCOTT
Long story
Following behind them JESSE and NIKKI holds some dishes
JESSE
Better than the parade and the Browns and Bears
game put together!
She nods to agree, leaving ANTHONY to clean up
SCENE ENDS
SCENE FIFTEEN
INT.---B'N'B DINNING AREA---DAYTIME
GARY comes in with the turkey, everyone cheers and sits excepts GARY
who remains stands getting everyone attention.
GARY
Ok, before we go on and do what we came
to do, I like to say how happy not only to
have my sergeant family, but my dear sister
and her step son Anthony but also Scott who
been a excellent here and as with every year
here since 1985..
DANA interrupts
DANA
I like to add some thing
GARY
Ah, sis I was trying finish
She stands
DANA
You will just wait It has been I pleasure here,
seeing my little brother accomplishments
and the interesting people
GARY
Ah, sis
DANA
I know, I may have been strict in the past, but
from what I e seen now, it paid though, I
wished you been more honest about you
and David, but I understand the politics, and
still wish both of you the best as with Scott
and Tony! You know if you e not careful
you can be an example to the world!
she sits, DAVID smiles and GARY look shocked
GARY
How did you
DANA
A sister knows!
Kisses him on cheek
GARY
Ok, without further ado
ANTHONY slowly walks to GARY, whispers something in his ear. He pauses
in shock and devastation. Sits down holding hand on face.
GARY
My God!
GARY (CONT'D)
(To NIKKI)
It Carla she was shot...
Everyone mumble, Shocked NIKKI freezes. DANA grabs her shoulder;
her head falls on it.
THE END
We e Half Way There Episode six : We Gather Together.....
By Bryant Mclemore
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