too cliché.
Tiger: Youll see the humor in that in a few minutes. This chapter turns out to be weird as hell.
Falcon: Ohhh yeah...
>>However, if enough people ask me to, I might get another chapter up. I’m not too sure if I want to,
though. Well, barring that, I think this is pretty good, and this is from Draco’s POV. I wrote it about a
month ago, to tell you the truth. o.O
Tiger: Apparently writing something a month ago is bad. Or odd.
Falcon: Or whatever the fuck that emoticon means
Griffon: I think it means stunned.
Falcon: Why the fuck is she stunned at her own writing time period?
Griffon: ....*shrugs*....
>> I could use a beta reader for my stories, of course. That thought actually just crossed my mind.
Anywhoo, enough rambling. Enjoy!
>>Warnings: eventual H/D slash (not in this prologue), much Japanese language (I’m obsessed with it,
actually, so I put it everywhere)
Falcon: Who wants to bet its used incorrectly?
>>Disclaimer: Nothing but the god belongs to me. And the nifty tornado thingy. I really like that.
Tiger: And THIS is cliche?
>>Prologue: Wherein Draco Meets an Old Man
Falcon: *Smacks down Falcon Fact #1* Never use a word like wherin or therin when where or there will do
absolutely fine.
>>I open my eyes. All around me is an inky black substance, swirling around in circles like a tornado. It
takes me up, and I find myself spinning around in its dangerous dance
Falcon: I have nothing against cool, mystical writing... unless its in slash. Jesus, your like Tiger...
Griffon: I like Tigers writings!
Falcon: You would...
>>, passing by many other people, and unfamiliar places. The ‘tornado’ suddenly deposits me into a well-
furnished room at the feet of an old man.
Griffon: *Blinks* Isnt this where he freaks out and tries to induce vomiting of the Himilaiian insanity
peppers?
Tiger: ...
Falcon: Were taking your TV.
>>His hair is long and silver, and his eyes are bright gold. His robes are a twisted mix of scarlet and emerald,
reminding me of a Muggle tie-dyed T-shirt I had seen once.
Falcon: Either this guy just fell in a mine, or he has no sense of fashion. Have you ever seena dark
green/dark red tye dye shirt?
>>“Welcome, Draco Malfoy,” the man says in a voice as old as time.
Falcon: (Draco) And as the darkness set in on my bitter and twisted sould with the force of a thousand
atomic bombs-
Griffon: ...Shut up. I beg you.
>>I shakily stand up, and gawk at him, opening and closing my mouth as I try to say something. I must be
doing an uncanny impression of a goldfish.
Draco: *Raises an eyebrow* Im not dignifying that with a comment...
Tiger: Oh, good, the real cast is here... *Dissapears in a pop to go mock other fics*
Hermione: I hate it when he does that.
>>“Who are you, and where am I?” I finally manage to get out.
Harry: (Old Man) I, am Marklar. This, is Marklar.
Draco/Ron: .......
Hermione: Oh god... I wish your house didn’t have cable, Harry
>>“I am the human form of the Mirai* God.”
Draco: As opposed to, say, the fish form?
Hermione: (Smacks him) I think we can leave that part alone considering some of the stories weve been
forced to read
Draco: Im just saying that hes standing righ-
Hermione: (Raises her hand)
Draco: (Trails off mumbling)
>>“God?”
Ron: Bless you.
Harry: Alaniss Morseitte sneezed?
Hermione: What, you have a DVD player now too? I thought the Dursleys DEPRIVED you of things.
Harry: (Grins)
>>“Yes. It is a long and complicated story, and not one for a mortal like you to know.
Draco: I take offense at that remark...
Harry: You would.
>>As for where you are, I have temporarily removed your soul from your body, and brought you to a
dimension of my own making, in order to tell you something of great importance.”
Draco: If that WASNT long and complicated, Id hate to hear the part of the story that was
Harry: Doesnt this guy have a cell phone?
>>“And what would that be?” I drawl out, finally regaining my prideful Malfoy stance.
Hermione: I dont think people consider their own form of talking ‘drawling’...
Draco: Oh come on! I know damn well I can keep it cool, but at this point Id be trying to wake up, not
bantering with the mystical space god
>>“You are on the wrong side, young Malfoy. You should be on the side of light, fighting alongside your
soul mate, not against.”
Harry: And one more thing... *shuddering gasp*... Malfoy... *gasp*... I am your father.
Hermione/Draco/Ron: ........
Harry: I hate you all.
>> I find it very hard to believe the man. I’ve been going steady with Pansy Parkinson since third year, and
can’t really imagine myself with anyone else, let alone someone fighting against Voldemort.
Draco: I wasnt even dating Pansy Parkinson in fourth year! Shes a snotty, arrogant bitch.
Harry: Sounds perfect for you
Draco: Hey!
>> I decide to show how little I believe him with my normal sarcasm.
Hermione: As would be the point of sarcasm...
>>“I suppose you’ll next tell me that my soul mate is a Gryffindor?”
Draco: Oh christ Im getting bad feelings about this story.
Hermione: For the painfully obvious and unlikely comment you just made?
Draco: No, because Im guessing in the next sentence theyll be something stupid like ‘Yes, that he is’
>>“Yes. That he is.”
Draco: Natch...
>> I’m not sure whether the so-called god noticed the sarcasm or was deliberately ignoring it. Either way, I
still can’t believe what he says. It’s impossible for a Malfoy to be a good guy, isn’t it? This is one heck of a
weird dream.
Draco: I do NOT talk to dreams.
Harry: Typical he argues his dream talking as opposed to considering himself evil
>>“This isn’t a dream, Young One,” the man says sternly as if reading my thoughts.
Ron: Theres no ‘as if’ about that
>> “You are destined for this, and there is no way you can change it.” I find myself laughing at the absurdity
of that statement. My father always told me that there is no such thing as destiny, and he’s never been wrong
before. Why should he be wrong now?
Draco: My father never been wrong before? That git lost us our house elf!
>>“There is no such thing as destiny,” I reply scathingly. “Beside which, even if there was, there is no way I
could willingly converse with a Gryffindor, let alone fall in love with them. I am a Malfoy, it is my
responsibility to join the Dark Lord** now that he is once again powerful.”
Draco: (Snickers)
Hermione: What?
Draco: I basically said that it was my destiny to rejoin with Big V.
Harry: Oh... I thought you meant something else.
Draco: And it IS funny that the Dark Lords back in power.
Harry: ...prick.
>>“Then I am afraid I have no choice. You are going to realize your destiny whether you like it our not.”
Hermione: People dont have a choice about realizing their destiny. I think this persons talking about
potential...
>>“What are you going to do? Take control of my thoughts and body?”
Draco: Melodrama comes from me about as naturally as an oral bowel movement...
Hermione: Im not even going to ask where you get muggle movies.
>>“You will see.” I open my mouth to retort to that, but find the room gone, and the tornado suddenly
sucks me back in again.
Draco: Whos talking here? Am I?
>> I spin around in circles as I had before, and don’t find myself worried in the least.
Harry: Are you sure YOU didnt write this? You seem amazingly cool headed.
Draco: If I was writing this, youd be a pile of smoking bones by now.
>> I will just end up in my bed laughing at my dream. Then the tornado dissipates, and I find myself falling
from the sky, very far and very fast. The old man’s voice sounds once again in my head, repeating a single
sentence over and over again. Yume janai; it isn’t a dream.
Draco: WHY is the weird hippie god speaking Japanese to a kid from England?
>>A/N: So, how was it? This one was going to be my first attempt at H/D slash… I’d like to take this time,
though, to thank everyone that reviewed my other stories. Arigato!!!
Draco: (Twitches) Ah, so its yet another story where Im paired with lightning boy here. Thats fantastic. It
really is. I think I need a drink...
>>*I think this means future. Thank God for Dragonball Z, huh? ^.~
Hermione: Thank you mighty and powerful lord for a bad cartoon with thirty minutes of fighting.
Harry: Dont forget the guy with the third eye
Draco/Ron: (Glance at each other, and shrugs)
>>**Draco’s not afraid to *think* Voldemort’s name, but he won’t say it out loud.
Draco: (Stands up on his chair) Volde-fucking-mort. Only people who are afraid of his dont say it you twit...
Hermione: You do know the author cant hear you, right?
Draco: Shut up.
>>Please review! I’ll love you forever!! While you’re here, go read some of my other stories and review
them, will ya?
Draco: No. No I will not.
Hermione: She cant HEAR you!
Falcon: (Walks in with a stack of papers)
Ron: Oh god, theres more?
Falcon: Come on, that wasnt so bad. In fact, this is as good as its going to get for you guys.
Draco: Please tell me your kidding.
Falcon: (Places the new papers in the projector, and flicks it on)
Harry: ...bloody hell...
>>A/N: Chapter one of Soul Mate is here. Finally. I don’t really have much to say on this one, though, so
I’ll just let you read it.
Draco: Happy happy joy joy...
Hermione: All right, I dont like this any better than you do, but has it ever occured to you NOT to be a
jackass?
Draco: Honestly? No.
>>Grammar errors fixed: 2/28/02
Hermione: That makes my job sustantially easier
>>/…/ is Draco’s thoughts
Harry: She had to invent a bracket system instead of writing ‘he thought’?
>>\…\ is Draco’s annoying inner voice
Ron: (Snickers) I dont think that theres anything ‘inner’ about it
Draco: Dont make me buy your house and turn it into a parking lot, Weasly.
>>Warnings: bad language, pre-slash
>>Disclaimer: Don’t own it. Really, I don’t. Wish I did, though.
Draco: If you owned it, no one would care anyway...
>>Chapter One: Wherein Draco Denies *Everything*
Hermione: (Points silently at Falcon Fact #1)
>>At the end of my fall, I hit something hard.
Draco: Arent I supposed to be back in bed? Unlike a weasley, I dont sleep on the floor, thank you
Ron: (Dives for him, and is eventually wrestled back to his seat by Hermione and Harry)
Draco: (Snickers)
>>Tiredly, I turn onto my back, and try to remember my dream.
Harry: He forgot his dream seconds after it happened? People dont remember dreams because they happen
hours before they wake up...
>>Unable to do so, I feel myself begin to drift when it suddenly hits me. I sit up straight immediately, and
find myself staring into a pair of very beautiful, but disturbingly familiar eyes.
Ron: Does anyone else have an image of this god-thing sitting on Dracos lap right now? Otherwise, hed be
staring directly at the guys crotch.
Harry: (Eyebrows dart up) H-
Draco/Hermione: (Clamp their hands over his mouth)
Draco: Finish that sentence, and I will kill you
>>“Oh, shit,” I whisper, and promptly faint.
Hermione: Can we take a break for a second. PEOPLE, please, think when you write. Especially if Im in the
story. If the stories going from Dracos point of view, than obviously he couldnt realize he had fainted
Draco: You are so anal retentive...
Hermione: ...humph...
>>A few hours later, I wake back up, and can’t decide whether to be relieved or concerned that there is
nobody in sight.
Draco: Why would that concern me?
>> I look around the room and realize, first, that the room is incredibly shabby, second, that everything in
there is Muggle made, and third, that all the stuff seems to be broken.
Draco: Oh... my... GOD! Im in Weasleys house!
Ron: (Seethes)
>> I automatically decide that the eyes I’d seen did not belong to who I thought they did.
Harry: (Blinks) Id love it if theyd enlighten us about whos eyes he thought they were
>>After the initial relief,
Hermione: -or concern
>>I decide to leave the room. Upon opening the door, I am greeted with the sight of the very last person I
want to see.
Draco: About time they put you in the story, Potter.
Harry: (Trys to ignore him)
>>We stare at each other silently until he suddenly pushes me back into the room, hissing, “Stay *in* there,
Malfoy.”
Draco: The writer is missing the very obvious step of me blowing this person out of their shoes with a curse
Harry: I think Im going to prove myself the better man by not making the obvious joke
Hermione: (Sighs) Thank you.
>>I stumble back as he closes the door quietly. Sitting back on the bed, I bury my face in my hands and
wonder what I had done to deserve this.
Draco: What in the hell is going on!?
>>/Maybe I shouldn’t have been such a snobby jerk to everyone.
Harry: Despite the overall accuracy Im seeing here, Draco does not thought process like that
Draco: How do you know?
Harry: Well do you?
Draco: ...no.
>>Oh well, can’t change the past now. Wait a second, just when did I start believing that old man?
Draco: One, I didnt. Two, he never mentioned anything about me being a ‘snobby jerk’.
>> Mirai god, honestly. What the heck does ‘mirai’ mean, anyway? I don’t speak Chinese./
>>My annoying inner voice decides to pop in then, unfortunately.
Hermione: This story is a tenses nightmare. That would be ‘decided’, dear.
>> \Or Japanese. Or whatever it is.\ I ignore it.
>>/Maybe Potter knows. Wait, scratch that, maybe Mudblood Granger knows. She probably knows how to
speak some foreign language. If I’m lucky, that’ll include Chinese./
Draco: Or I could use one of the dozens of spells about translations weve been taught. Or ask a teacher. Or
anyone but Granger. Who I dont call ‘mudblood’ when talking to myself, I might add
Harry: You talk to yourself (Snickers)
Draco: (Blinks) Dont you?
Harry: ...
>>\Japanese.\
>>/Whatever./
>>\Here’s a thought: if you’re lucky, Granger might actually speak to you.\ Now, that I *can’t* ignore.
Hermione: It would take a lot more than luck
Draco: Christ Potter, even your annoying voice you use everyday is smarter than the one in this story
Harry: Cute. Really.
>>/What do you mean by that? Who *wouldn’t* want to speak to me? I’m rich, I’m powerful, I’m good
looking, and I’m popular. What more could a girl want?/
Draco: Ah yes. We all know Granger needs to want me to rodger her to talk to me.
>>\You to be nice?\
Hermione: Your annoying voice has a point you know.
>>/I don’t need to be nice. I’m a Malfoy. Besides, when did I start caring about Granger? I’ve got better
things to worry about. Like, what to do about being stuck here with Potter and how I’ll get back without a
wand or money./
Draco: Ohhhh... so I AM with Potter. (Smug grin)
Harry: You do know what this is going to lead to, right?
Draco: Ah... fuck
>>\You’re stuck here until he leaves. You heard what the god said. You two are soul mates. You should get
used to him now, when you’ve got him all to yourself.\
Hermione: You have a surprisingly open mind, Draco, even if you try to suppress it.
Draco: This guy isnt open minded, hes an idiot
>>/I don’t need to get used to him. He’s not my soul mate. Pansy is./
Draco: Pansys an idiot as well.
>>\Pansy’s evil.\
Hermione: Im beginning to like your annoying voice.
>>/*I’m* evil./ Oh God, now I’m pouting at myself.
Draco: Thats it. Im out of here. This has gotten utterly ridiculous. (Trys to rise, and finally realizes theres
about thirty feet of rope around his feet) Ah, yes, I keep forgetting Tiger forces us to do this.
>>\She doesn’t give a damn about you.\
Harry: And the feeling is mutual
Draco: (Grins) Well said
Ron: Stop agreeing. Now. Your freaking me out
>>/Yes she does. She loves me./
Draco: No she doesnt.
>>\She isn’t *capable* of love.\
Draco: Yes she is.
>>/And, I suppose I’m not either, then./
Draco: Yes I am.
Harry: (Blinks) Really?
Draco: (Sighs) Just because I play the B plot bad guy to your wannabe super hero doesnt mean I dont have
feeling, Potter.
Ron: Yes it does!
>>\Yes you are. You’re in love with Potter. You won’t admit it to yourself, though.\
Harry: This suddenly took a nauseating turn...
>>/I am *not* in love with Potter!/
Draco: Id have bitch slapped this voice so badly by now
>>\See what I mean?\
Hermione: Ah yes, the classic technique of telling someone they’re in denial, and saying ‘see’ when they say
no.
>>/It is not possible for me to be in love with the bloody Boy-Who-Lived./
Harry: Do any of you actually think of me as that?
Draco/Ron/Hermione: Nah.
>>\You’re not in love with the Boy-Who-Lived. You’re in love with Harry.\
Harry: Draco, Im not in love with your chair. However, Im quite taken with that thing your sitting on.
Draco: (Eye widen)
Harry: ...NOT like that you fucking pervert...
>>/I’m absolutely *not* in love with Harry! And his name’s Potter, damn it, get it straight!/
Draco: This has switched from self debate to all out skitzophrenia.
>>\You’re in denial.\
>>/*You’re* delusional./
Draco: Score one for me.
>>\I’m your inner voice. The inner voice is the one that’s always right and puts the doubts in your mind.\
Harry: I could name seventy instances right now where that isnt true.
Hermione: I only need to name one. Im pretty sure the Dark Lords intuition doesnt whisper the right
motives into his ear
>>/You aren’t always right. You must be on something./
Draco: Your on a fic thats about to make me put a shiv through my spine
>>\How can I be on something without the rest of you being on something, too? I *am* you, stupid git.\ I
pause, unable to think of an answer to that. \That’s what I thought.\ The voice sounds smug.
Harry: Look at my hand. Its on my knee. The rest of me is not on my knee.
Hermione: I dont think thats what she meant...
>>/Great. I must be going insane. I just lost an argument with myself./
Draco: If anyone argues with themself, they are going to lose. Theyre also going to win.
>>\In order for you to be going insane, you would’ve had to be sane to begin with.\
Harry: Despite being a prick, I think Draco is sane. Otherwise the sorting hat wouldve started screaming
when he put it on
>>/I was sane. Until you began to talk to me./
Draco: (Yells at the Fic) Your talking to yourself!!!
>>\You’re a Malfoy. Malfoy’s aren’t sane.\
>>/Oh, shut *up*!/ There are a couple minutes of silence. Then,
>>\You’re in love with Harry, ya know.\ I groan and bury my face in Potter’s pillow. The voice mercifully
shuts up then, and I fall asleep within seconds.
Hermione: You are an amazingly easy sleeper
>>Unfortunately, a few hours later the voice comes back.
>>\Wakey, wakey.\ I groan.
Hermione: Any apparently you can wake yourself up on command
Draco: This is annoying enough without you jabbing the whole time, you know.
>>/Go away./
>>\Sun’s down. Harry’ll be in here soon.\ I wake immediately at that, and sit up straight. My damned ‘inner
voice’ laughs. \Nope, you’re definitely not in love with Harry.\
Harry: What the hell? Where have I been all day?
Draco: Not to mention not wanting to be sprawled out face down when your nemesis walks into a room
couldnt constitute love in the loosest sense of the word
>>“Shut up,” I tell it out loud. The door opens, and a frowning Harry Potter comes in the room with a towel
wrapped around his waist, his hair dripping wet.
Harry: Ah yes. Those great showers right before you go to sleep
>>I do a double take. With *only* a towel wrapped around his waist.
Harry: Ugh... heres where things start to get truly bad
>> My jaw drops, and I stare at him, trying my best not to drool. Potter has a *very* nice body.
Draco: I think its about time I started trying to knaw off my leg to escape
Harry: Youre physically about to drool? Ew...
>>My inner voice begins laughing again. \Really, it’s not hard at all to tell you’re not in love with him.\
Ron: Im not about to shag a Firebolt, but I stare at them trying not to drool.
Hermione: (Blinks)
Ron: I havent said anything in a while!
>>A/N: So, there’s the first chapter. How do you like Draco’s inner voice? Ain’t he nifty? The idea came
out of nowhere. It’s odd, though. That sounds suspiciously like my own arguments with my ‘inner voice’.
^_~
Draco: Ohhh! Shes NUTS! I get it.
>>Thanks to:
>>*AtieJen*
>>*Prophetess of Hearts*
>>*silverkitten*
>>*Shoujo Kitsune*
>>*venus4280*-Is Draco in character enough for you?
Harry: Thats a typical list of fan girl names if Ive ever heard them
>>*ILLK*-you’re right, it was very cruel me to offer the story and say I wasn’t thinking about finishing it.
Then again, I’m not a very nice person usually. I hope this makes up for that, though.
Draco: ‘Cruel’ is what Im going to do to Tiger when I get out of here. Not saying you wont finish a bad
story. I believe the words you’re looking for is ‘inspiring false hope’.
Harry: I dont think people who say ‘false hope’ truly know what hope means.
Draco: Shut UP, Potter.
(Falcon walks in as they argue, loads more paper, and slips out the back)
>>A/N: And, here’s chapter two! If anybody’s actually still reading this, that is…. If you are, please, please,
please, *please* review! I need to know people like this so I actually *want* to continue it! OK, good.
Onwards…
>>(Dead Silence)
>>Warnings: more bad language, hints at slash, mention of abuse…
Harry: The Dursleys are too afraid of Sirius to hit me...
Hermione: Besides, Ive seen more than mention of abuse in G Rated movies.
>>Disclaimer: Dude, Kaikaku, I *really* don’t own Harry Potter. Honestly.
Draco: (Giggling Fan Girl) Oh. My. GOD! No way! NO. WAY. Your kidding.
Hermione: You are suck a prick.
Draco: (Grins)
>>/…/=Draco’s thoughts
>>\…\=Draco’s inner voice
Ron: As opposed to his outter thoughts?
>>*…*=bold words
>>Chapter Two: Wherein Draco Learns Two Somethings
Hermione: (Only has the energy to look yearningly at Falcon Fact #1)
>>“What?” Potter snaps irritably.
Draco: Maybe the fact Im LOCKED in your HOUSE, Potter
>>“What what?” I reply, in a slight daze.
Hermione: Theres a little thing that could only work in writing. Real people dont say ‘what what’
>>“You’re gawking at me!” I blink. /Oops…/
Harry: This guy is an idiot. He walks in half naked in front of a guy he crammed into this room, and wants
him to look away
Draco: At least your in character
Harry: ...I hate you. So very, very much.
>>“Your point being?” Potter glares at me. I close my mouth with a snap
Ron: That sounds pretty painful
Hermione: My parents are dentists. Ive seen patients with wired jaws close their mouths, and they still dont
snap.
>>and allow my patented Malfoy smirk to grace my features.
Draco: Oh god. Im many things, but a narcissist I am not
Hermione: Yes you are!
Draco: Well, Im not a dumb one.
>> Potter walks fully into the room, closing the door silently.
Harry: Ive been standing barely clothed in the doorway talking for the last five minutes?
>>He turns back to me with his own sinister smirk on his face.
Harry: I dont smirk. I glare, or I smile. I dont do both.
>>“Like what you see, Malfoy?”
Harry: Wait a minute, Im suddenly the agressor here?
>> I blink again. If I’m not careful, he might find out that I’m bisexual.
Draco: WOAH. Hold the phone. That little addition of a STORY ALTERING fact was way too subtle.
Really. It wasnt so badly and suddenly placed it burnt my retinas. Not at all.
>>\Or that you’re in love with him.\
Draco: (Dracos annoying thoughts) All right, Im actually a pre-recorded message from Potter thats playing
in your head. Or your insane. Because when people argue with themselves, its not half as tangible as this
>>I nearly sigh out loud.
>>/Didn’t I tell you to go away?\
Harry: Wha-? Huh!? Its... it BOTH voices at once. And theyre telling each other to go away!!!
Hermione: Are you done ragging on the typo?
Harry: Quite.
>>While I’m arguing with myself, I make sure to glare at Potter.
Draco: (Half crazed, sing-songy voice) Thoughts process in milliseconds, youd be done arguing by the time
your lips twitched...
Harry: I dont think this fic is good for you.
Draco: Im being portrayed as a bisexual skitzophrenic who, after everything, is in love with you. Its a very
disturbing image
>>“I’ll take that as a ‘yes’, then.”
Hermione: Harry, does glaring mean yes?
Harry: *Doesnt glare*
Hermione: Exactly.
>> I really should stop glaring at Potter-it might make him spontaneously combust.
Draco: If I could make Potter spontaeously combust, Id be sitting next to ashes right now
>>Yes, wizards have heard of that.
Hermione: Can anyone think of any reason they wouldnt have?
Group: (Silence)
Hermione: Mhm-hmmm...
>>Mainly because it’s usually us that make people do that. Accidentally, I swear.
Ron: You seem to have a hard time thinking of yourself as evil, with all these ‘accidents’ and resitsances to
blowing up Harry.
>>“That was about as far from a ‘yes’ as you’re likely to get, Potter.” Is it just me, or was that a really lame
reply?
Draco: And now Im thought processing like a wishy washy pansy.
Ron: -!
Draco: (Has his wand at Rons throat) Dont even speak
>>Potter merely continues to smirk devilishly, turning to walk over to his dresser. I can’t help but watch
him as he searches through his clothes, obviously looking for something good to wear.
Hermione: Isnt this about que for you to ask what the hell is going on, Draco?
Harry: Or to run for the door...
>>Really, he shouldn’t be dressing in front of me like that. He can’t tell what I might do to him.
Draco: But seconds ago he didnt even know that I was bi. Hm.
>>The thought that he wants me to do something-anything, crosses my mind, but I shake it away.
Hermione: Technically, you are doing ‘anything’. Breathing, blinking, sitting still...
Draco: ... thank you Ms Brittanica.
>>The Boy-Who-Lived wouldn’t, *couldn’t* be…
Harry: Green?
Ron: Dead?
Hermione: Flying?
Draco: Straight?
Harry: .....
Draco: C’mon Potter, have you ever seen yourself huddled with Weasel in the Three Broomsticks? You
wonder why people write so much slash on you
>>Could he?
>>“Perhaps, Malfoy, if you really don’t like what you see, you might consider *not* watching me dress?”
Harry: So the eyes I have on the back of my head dont need glasses? Thats not fair...
>>He had noticed that I am watching him.
Draco: (Screaming at the projection) Than STOP, FUCKING, LOOKING!!!!
Hermione: ...how many times have we gone over that the stories us, and the author, cant hear you?
>>/Aw, shit./
Draco: I dont say ‘Aw’ thank you very much
>>\Well, you *do* rather like that word, don’t you?\
Hermione: Have you even said ‘shit’ that much in this story?
Draco: (Muttering) Nooope...
>>/As a matter of fact, I do. Now, go away./
>>\I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for the fact that you’re in denial that you’re not in love…\
Harry: Your denying that you dont love me? Why Draco, thats so sweet.
Draco: Piss off... this rampant skitzophrenias starting to bug the hell out of me
>> I groan out loud and bury my head in my hands. In a couple of seconds, I feel Potter staring at me.
>>“Is there something wrong, Malfoy?” He sounds awfully concerned….
Harry: Oh look. Ive gone from a teasing prig to pining over your health.
>>“No, nothing. I’m just having a slight argument with the little voices in my head, Potter. I do wish you’d
stop interrupting-this *is* a private conversation.”
Draco: ....
Harry: Unless I know a hell of a lot more than Im telling you, shouldnt I be calling the funny farm ‘bout
now?
>>I can sense Potter’s bemusement and look up, only to find him without a shirt on. Does this boy have no
dignity at all?
Ron: Its not like hes a girl or anything. If we werent ignoring the part earlier about Harry supposedly being
straight, and not knowing Draco was bi, this is a lot less X rated than quidditch practice...
Hermione: (Blinks)
Harry: (Nudges Ron) Being smarts her area, mate.
>>“Uh-huh….” I stare at him once again. Damn boy should put a shirt on….
Harry: Cripes Draco, what kind of depraved slut are you? Weve spent six pages of you litterally drooling at
my chest.
Draco: At least Im not standing around in a towel like some kind of voyeur.
>>“Is something confusing you, Potter? Surely, you must be intelligent enough to figure out exactly what I
meant on your own.” Potter smirks at me once again. This is getting awfully old.
Harry: I agree with you there...
Draco: (Draco) Im talking to mysterious voices after magically appearing in your bed. Stop acting so
confused.
>>“No. It just sounds to me like you’ve got a conscience.”
Hermione: Does anyone else feel like were just hearing one out of every twenty or so sentences thats being
said in this conversation?
Group: (Nods)
>>“Potter, the day I get a conscience is the day pigs fly.”
Harry: You couldnt have found something better to say considering were wizards?
>>He rubs his neck thoughtfully.
>>“My cousin was on a plane once. Does that count?” I snort. How immature.
Draco: And confusing, considering I dont know who your cousin is, and wouldnt get the reference...
“No, Potter, that doesn’t count. I meant what I said quite literally.” With a soft ‘ah’, he plops next to me on
his bed.
>>/Why the hell hasn’t he put a shirt on yet?/
Draco: (Draco) Why the hell havent I simply knocked his ass out yet?
>>\Who cares? You know you just want to…\
Hermione: Going back to how incredibly fast thinking is, do you really think Draco could continually cut his
own thoughts off like this?
>>/I don’t. I am not attracted to Potter. I am not attracted to Potter./ I repeat that over and over again in my
head in order to keep myself from jumping him. Damn him to the seventh layer of Hell for being so hot!
Harry: Wow... see that? There goes plot continuity... (Looks over) Draco? What the hell are you doing.
Draco: (Chewing on his rope) Mmphff...
>>“I think you’re going to be stuck here overnight, Malfoy.” I stare at him incredulously. There is absolutely
*no* way I’m spending the night in the same house-let alone room-with *that*!
Harry: Unless your referring to the bed, Im completely lost, considering how youve had to force yourself not
to jump my bones only seconds ago.
Hermione: Can anyone tell me why no ones mentioned anything about Dracos sudden appearence?
Draco: Fucked if I know...
>>“No way, Potter. You figure out some way to get me out of here….”
Ron: Why is it even a problem!?
>>“Or what, Malfoy? You’ll blast off one of the walls of the room, steal my broom, and *fly* away?
Draco: Theres always Apparation, the Knight Bus, summoning my own broom...
>> I’m sure your *rich* and *powerful* family must have ways of getting around the fact that students
aren’t allowed to use magic during the summer vacation, but the rest of us have a bit of trouble with that.
Draco: I could use the front door, hail a taxi, get a plane ticket...
Hermione: Weve moved on Draco. I didnt know you took Muggle studies.
Draco: Hey, hunters take courses on animals dont they?
Hermione: ....that was both disgusting and offensive
Draco: Thanks.
>>You might get expelled. Or, even worse, you might get *me* expelled.”
Hermione: Damnit Harry, those are my lines!!
>>He spit out the words ‘rich’ and ‘powerful’ as if they were dirty words.
Harry: Wouldnt that be nice to have heard, eh, four sentences ago?
Draco: (Lying on his back on the floor, picking hopelessly at his rope) This never ends, does it? Were going
to die here.
>>That certainly isn’t nice, considering how rich he is.
Harry: You consider me rich?
Draco: (Looks up) You wish, Potter.
>>Rich? Wait a second….
“Why do you live with them anyway?” I ask before I can stop myself. Oops….
>>\There! Proof that you care about him!\
Harry: Or! You know! Proof you have human curiosity!
/No proof at all. I’m just curious./ I’m concentrating so hard on shutting up the voice that I almost miss
Potter’s response.
Draco: If I actually had a mental problem like this, I would have gone to a doctor a hell of a long time ago
“Dumbledore says it’s the safest place for me to be right now. I personally don’t believe him, the way the
Dursleys treat me like I’m dirt.”
Hermione: Arrogant bastard, arent you?
He must have forgotten who was in the room with him.
\Maybe he doesn’t care?\ I resort back to ignoring the voice.
Ron: Its starting to seem like the voice is MSTing its own story
“Like dirt, Potter? Surely, it is not that horrible?”
Draco: Actually, the correct response was: Bwah. Hahah. Haha.
He gives me a look, and his voice is enough to freeze Hell over. Five times.
Hermione: Ah yes, that rare temperature that goes about a thousand degrees below absolute zero.
Ron: If it was that cold, wouldnt Draco be dead by now?
“You’re right. It isn’t that horrible. It’s worse. They treat me like Voldemort would a house elf.”
Harry: Even before I got a wanted fugitive as my gofather, the Dursleys didnt treat me that horribly. Hey
writer-lady, trying to make me sound like a whiny pussy isnt the best idea to get the audience into a
relationship.
Hermione: We need to keep you away from Draco...
I can’t help but shudder at the name. Funny how I don’t even notice when I think it, but can’t say it or listen
to it….
Draco: (Voice comes up miserably from under his chair, where Draco has dragged himself) Unless the word
is screeched by a banshee, hearing it shouldnt be any different from thinking it, because you wouldnt even
recognize it except in your mind
“Potter, they’re your family. They most certainly cannot hate you *that* much.” Family doesn’t hurt each
other. Not even mine.
Harry: (Glances down at the floor) So now theyre making you sound ignorant as well as crazy
Draco: Ugh...
“Oh? Then, how do you explain this cut?” He lifts some of his messy mop of hair, and shows me a nasty cut
on the side of his head.
Harry: Ew...
Hermione: Harry, youve always had a cut on your head.
Harry: Oh. Yeah.
/No, not a cut. It is more like a split./ How didn’t I notice it before? He isn’t done, though.
Ron: Done what, hemmoraging and dying? We were just told Harrys skull is split open
“Or, how about the near breaking of my ribs? The huge bruise on my thigh? The many times before that my
nose has been broken by Dudley?
Draco: (Sits up to watch the image of a beaten Harry) Oh come on! I dont care how stupid your relative are,
theyd know not to beat somebody under wizard protection
Hermione: (Suddenly gets out a notebook and starts writing in it)
Ron: Er, Hermione?
Hermione: “Cheap attempts at charater sympathy...”
Ron: Ah.
The huge tents that have been give to me from Dudley’s wardrobe, and they call my clothes? The…”
Hermione: “Ignoring facts of Harrys wealth and ability to buy clothes while away”
“Alright, alright! I get the point, you can stop now! But…” I don’t want to finish my sentence. I can’t let
Potter know that I *do* care about his well-being.
Hermione: (Stares) I think I need more paper
Draco: (Snickers)
\That you love him.\ The voice adds helpfully.
Harry: (Annoying voice) Love! Love love love love. Looooove! Him! YOU! Love!
/That I can actually stand to be around him and wouldn’t mind being his friend./ I argue back fiercely.
Draco: (Jumps to his feet) Now where the hell did that come from? Seconds earlier I was arguing that I
hated him, and suddenly I not only had a change of heart but am willing to admit it?
“But what, Malfoy?” Shit. How am I going to keep myself from answering him?
Draco: I suggest a curse to the jugular area
Harry: Owch...
I glance over at Potter, who is staring at me, looking… hopeful?
Harry: If I wanted him to like me I wouldnt have smirked at him like a jackass for the last 15 pages.
No, not how I’ll keep from finishing the sentence-how I’ll finish the sentence with my dignity and mask of
indifference intact.
Ron: Mask of indifference? Youve been simpering like a schoolgirl!
“But, why? Don’t they know who you *are*?”
Draco: Oh wait, I dont care who you are either, besides as a guide for where to aim
Potter laughs a low, hollow laugh-the laugh of someone who doesn’t care anymore and is trying to hide it.
Hermione: Wouldnt that be the voice of someone who wasnt trying to hide it?
“Of course they know who I am. They’ve certainly heard enough from Dumbledore. They knew what I was
before *I* did. Well, some parts, at least. I don’t think they knew how famous I was all over the Wizard
world. I spent the first eleven years of my life thinking that my parents had died in a car crash, and sleeping
in a cupboard under the stairs. They didn’t want anyone to know that a freak was living with them, after all.”
Harry: And Im suddenly telling more to Draco in one sitting than I did to Ron or Hermione in my first two
years of school
Draco: Why havent I interrupted with a very long, exxagerated yawn yet? This Draco has NO technique.
His tone has a bitter edge to it that makes me think for some reason that the boy had gone evil on us.
Harry: Both my Aunt and Uncle always have bitter edges to their voices. Despite being idiots, they arent
evil.
“Why are you telling me?”
Draco: Holy hell, a good point
Potter shrugs.
“Because you’re here.”
Draco: How romantic, writer-chick
Harry: And how stupid. I dont just babble to random people
“I am your enemy.” I feel called upon to point that out.
Draco: (Draco) Im also a melodramatic, slap sticky, straight from the film credits of a bad movie GIT
Ron: At least you can admit it, Draco
Draco: Shove it, Weasley
“You are a person in school that I particularly like squabbling with, nothing else.
Draco: Hey! I think Im a bit more than that. I almost knocked your sorry ass off your broom eighty feet in
the air.
Harry: I dont like squabbling with anyone...
Voldemort is my enemy.” I stare at him wordlessly.
Harry: Im meolodramatic now too. And way too serious.
/I’m nothing else but someone he likes to squabble with? Nothing else, at all? I shouldn’t care. But, I do.
And… it hurts…./
Draco: What!? Sweet merciful... (Hits the floor again)
Hermione: We should tie him upright.
Draco: Your not even in this story, bint, you wouldnt understand
\You’re in love with him, you bloody fool.\ I nearly argue again, but cut myself off just in time. My blood
runs cold. What if I am?
Draco: (Grabs his head and screams)
Hermione: ...right. But thinking of which, if hed cut himself off, not only would he not have been able to tell
us what the thought was, but his blood would have remained a nice, warm, 98.6 degrees.
A second later, I laugh it off. Impossible.
Harry: Wow. Exactly one second from blood chilling to complete disbelief. Your skitzophrenia is many
layered.
Draco: (Groans)
Potter is staring at me again. Can he get any more annoying?
Ron: (Takes Dracos seat) Your randomly groaning. Why shouldnt he stare at you?
“What?” I grumble out.
“What what?” He replies innocently. I glare at him.
Hermione: No one talks like that!!
“Cute, Potter, real cute.”
“I try.” He grins cheekily at me. I glare at him again. I wonder what would happen to me if I *did* make
him combust?
Harry: If you made me combust, Id combust. What the hell kind of question is that?
“Get off my bed, Malfoy.” I blink at him, surprised.
Hermione: Yet you dont seem surprised to be on his bed to begin with.
Harry: More than that, Im not surprised hes on my bed.
“Why?” Potter rolls his eyes at me.
Ron: (Harry) Because I detest you and your sliming up my sheets.
“Because I would like to get to sleep some time tonight. I wake early, forced as the waking may be.”
Harry: And my biggest issue here is rest, not having my guardians discover a sleeping blonde boy in my
room
Hermione: Oooo... I bet that would go over well
“Where am *I* going to sleep?” I ask, standing. Potter shrugs.
Ron: Its not like its all that confusing. There are two options. The bed, or the floor.
Draco: (Looks up wearily) I do not sleep on the floor
“On the floor.”
Draco: Your a prig, Potter
He climbs into the bed and under the sheets.
Draco: And your a whore, too
I look at the floor, dirty, dusty, and littered with owl pellets.
Draco: And your disgusting.
Harry: My floor is clean, thank you.
“I think not.” I growl indignantly.
Draco: (Gets into a crouch) God damn straight
Harry: Oh get over yourself...
“Would you rather sleep in the bed *with* me?” I blink.
Draco: No, Id rather you sleep on the floor. Obviously.
Harry: Thats pretty damn typical of you.
“Maybe I would.” I don’t believe Potter would actually let me, so I think it a safe reply.
Draco/Harry: Damn straight!
Totally wrong.
Draco: Oh.
Harry: Bloody Hell.
Hermione: For the total lack of sexuality knowledge, and attraction to each other, theres way too much
sexual tension is this story.
“Then, climb on in. Just turn the light off first, would you? I’m afraid I forgot to.”
Ron: Have you gone Mad!? Are you a witch or- OW!! *Rubs eye*
Hermione: Draco!
Draco: Sorry, but that line was annoying enough the first time, when it was in context. *Cracks knuckles*
I look around the room as if I could somehow learn how to work a Muggle light.
Hermione: Good lord, a bit of insight?
Draco: Nah, poor character development. Id simply throw a chair through the light. Easy enough.
I hear Potter moving on the bed, and look at him with an eyebrow raised. He smiles contentedly up at me. I
gulp.
Harry: So now Im smiling? Why? *Grabs the fics and shakes it* TELL ME!!!
Hermione: *Puts her hand on his arm* Honey, you need a break...
\You stupid, bloody, little git. You know you’re in love with him. Just admit it already.\
Draco: Ugh... I need a break. This is possibly the dumbest argument Ive ever witnessed, and Ive had to
watch to fangirls argue over how long my penis was.
/I will not admit to something that’s not true./ I hear a soft sigh in my head and pray the voice has given up.
Harry: Your internal monlogue is sighing?
Draco: *Gritting teeth* I... have... no... idea...
“Well, Malfoy? Aren’t you going to turn off the light?
Draco: Maybe I dont WANT to. Think of that?
Hermione: You dont need to make excuses for your character...
Draco: Shut up...
It’s awfully hard to sleep with it on.” I glare at him once again. This is so damned redundant.
Draco: Yes! YES! Yes it is! So kill it. Now. Please.
“You’re not afraid of the dark, are you?”
Ron: Well, we just learned that Draco doesnt have his wand with him
Harry: ...?
Draco: Because youd be dead by now. Even WEASLEY can see it.
I grit my teeth. The git knows I don’t know how to work any of these Muggle contraptions.
Harry: You dont?
Draco: Of course I do. Its called Muggle Studies.
He must enjoy knowing that he’ll make me *ask* for his help.
Hermione: Unless Draco simply left the room, as he should have done long ago, for the sake of us all
However, he still appears merely mildly curious. I’ve never wanted someone more in my life….
Draco: WOAH! Hold the phone right there. This is done. Over. That was the STUPIDEST part of this story
to this point. I suddenly come around with no hesitation, and want to FUCK the git? No way.
Tiger: You got lucky. It mysteriously got cut off there.
Draco: Id kill you if you werent a writer.
Tiger: Well I am. So bite me. Final thoughts, boys and girls?
Hermione: The grammar and language was better than most of these things you give to us, so I had to
comment where I shouldnt have. It made this MST weak by comparison.
Tiger: ...I meant comment on the story.
Draco: Well, there were plot holes, unexplained situations, characters acting like jackasses and people like
Harry acting reasonably witty at points.
Harry: The fact we never discussed his sudden arrival in his room hurt this more than anything.
Ron: I think the fact it paired you two hurt this story more than anything.
Hermione: I dont know, if it was better done...
Draco: Shut up, Mudblood...