Draco: Oh good for them. In fact, Id like to mail them some very nice spores Ive been growing. They, uh,
smell good. Can I have some addresses?
Harry: Dude... that is not cool.
Draco: Shove it, scar boy
The characters are all Rowling's, I'm just borrowing them to satiate my evil little mind.
Hermione: I dont think anyone on earth who is evil truly believes that fact
Harry: Unless were in a badly written comic book as opposed to a badly written fic
Hermione: Maybe its Austin Powers 3?
And! This is SLASH! YAOI! Like Harry and Draco in the same bed!!!
Draco: Oh GOD...
Hermione: Are you upset at the random yelling, repetitivness, or the fact its you and Harry?
Draco: Pick one. Then pick all the other ones too.
I can’t warn you more. If you don’t like it, don’t read it! Got it?!
Harry: Wed love to oblige you lady, but were tied to chairs here
Hermione: Besides, were objecting to this mainly because its off to a horrible start and doesnt seem to be
getting any better.
Draco: I dont like the fact its slash, even if you do, Granger.
Beautiful Child
Harry: So this isnt about Draco?
Draco: Or Potter?
Hermione: I swear, you two are just automatically attacking each other at this point.
Beautiful child. I’m always at loss of words when I look at him. He is… he is like sunshine
Draco: Burns your skin, gives you cancer, and only comes out when it feels like it?
Hermione: You sure know how to take something pretty through the mud, Draco
Draco: Thank you
odd and unfamiliar in the dungeons, but so pretty nonetheless…
Harry: Nothing is pretty in a dungeon. Its... a dungeon.
Hermione: This is a punctuation nightmare.
He is the only one who can make my world spin
Draco: As opposed to Whizzing Whiskey. That stuff is strong.
, and first I hated it.
Harry: Id hate randomly bumping into spinning things as well
Hated it when he showed up at Hoghwarts
Hermione: Erm... thats Hogwarts. Nothing in it sounds remotely like an ‘h’ sound.
, all of smiles and jokes.
Ron: Can anyone explain that?
Anyone: ...
Ron: Natch.
He was a tiny kid, full of blonde curls
Draco: So your telling us someone took blonde, curly hair and stuffed this kid with it?
Hermione: Ew, Draco...
and big, too
Draco: *Porno music blares in the background*
Hermione: EW! Stop it!
big blue eyes for even a small child.
Harry: Oh... ok. Wait. Why is a small child at Hogwarts?
Hermione: Because their arent enough intelligent beta readers in the world?
I remember it now. Now when it is the only way left…
Draco: Huh?
Hermione: I have no clue. This is your fic on drugs, children.
He is going to die today.
Harry: Yikes, suddenly morbid. Is anyone following this plot?
Draco: (Squeaky, cartoonish voice) Just let me get high... I know I could understand If I just got high...
Hermione: Are you actually making a reference to Towely, Draco?
Draco: ...tell no one.
How could
Harry: This author write this without vomiting? Got me.
he of all people be so careless and be caught by Death Eaters?
Hermione: Wait... so who the hell is this about? It cant be Draco, because his father would never catch them.
Harry does not have blonde hair. Im lost.
I swallow
Draco: *More porn music*
Hermione: ...*Turns away from him and counts to ten*
and don’t look away when they get him out of the small cell, body too thin, face
white, mute from shock and fear.
Harry: Does anyone else notice the unual amount of times this person hit the ‘enter’ key for no real reason.
Hermione: I try not to.
He is stumbling after… who it is?
Harry: Who it is? Are we Yoda now? Bad this fic is me thinks.
Maybe Lucius… No!
Draco: How did my dad get put in this? WHEN does it take place? And why, for the love of god, does the
person stumbling after my dad-
Harry: Is that what hes doing?
Hermione: Maybe
Draco: -suddenly yell out ‘no!’??
They can’t do THAT to HIM!
Harry: ...oh my god
Hermione: What?
They can’t dirty him that way!
Hermione: ...oh my god.
I feel my anger.
Harry: And his anger slapped him for getting fresh
Hermione: I usually see, smell, or taste my anger. But feel a feeling? Nah.
I start to run.
Draco: Can you stop to run?
Hermione: Ha... ha.
If
the Dark Lord wants it, then he will allow me to *do the honour*
Hermione: Making orders to Voldemort? Pretentious prick, isnt he?
. It’s better than Lucius or
even Pettigrew.
Harry: If we are talking about the rape of some small, blonde hair, blue eyes boy, I dont think its good if
anyone does it. And this author should be arrested.
I love him more that any of his friends.
Hermione: Then save him ass!
I love him while they hate him just for
Harry: Your friends dont hate you.
Draco: I hate you..
Harry: But you arent my friend
Draco: Oh. Yeah.
his beauty, for his childish innocence.
Hermione: Why would you hate someone for that?
I don’t want it to be ruined. I want to help him, to be
gentle…
Harry: This is a lot more graphic in sheer innuendo than Ive ever seen before
But no. I want it, I’m a sick bastard to want him even in this state.
Hermione: Yes. Yes, you are. Whoever you are.
But I want him,
God, I really do.
Draco: Death Eater rapists dont pray to god
Harry: How would you know?
Draco: Dont get cute. It stnds to fact.
I want to cherish him, to stroke and kiss every part of him, to love him and
be gentle with him.
Hermione: Depending on who this narrator is, Im going to be sick
Harry: Ditto that.
I look at the Lord.
Draco: And he made the world in seven days, and it was good
Harry: I think they forgot to add the word ‘Dark’ in there, unless they are very, very blashphemous.
I kneel in front of him.
“ My Lord… I have a request…”
Draco: *Porn Music*
Hermione: Huh?
Draco: *Whispers in her ear*
Hermione: Ew! *Smacks him*
“Severus, my dear, dear slave, what do you want now?” He asks and smiles so evilly… I can’t
stand it.
Harry: I dont think Voldemort calls anyone ‘dear’, especially not twice
Draco: Or slaves. Were servants. And we can stand his smile.
Harry: ...!?
Draco: ...they! I meant they!
“I… I want the boy… I want to do that to him…” I whisper.
Draco: Is he supposed to know what the hell ‘that’ is, or who the boy is?
Harry: And how pedophilic is this sick freak?
“Oh so wanton for that boy.”
Hermione: Voldemort also doesnt say ‘wanton’
He laughs. “I can understand. Oh, look at those blonde locks!
He is so pretty! He has stolen your heart!”
Harry: ...Voldemort is gay?
Draco: Apparently.
He laughs. He thinks it is only a joke… Good for
me.
Draco: Yay! Now I get to go rape the nazi poster boy!
“Yes, and I want him! Please let me!” I try it with all my heart.
Harry: Try what?
Hermione: Theyre discussing the rape of a small boy and your disturbed at nonscensical rambling?
“I’ll let you. But in one condition. You must not enter him.
Harry: ...so it isnt rape?
Draco: So what the hell is this all about!?
We want him as a virgin.
Hermione: Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew!
Everyone: *Freezes*
Harry: I-is the narrator Snape?
Draco: I think so...
Hermione: Oh GOD ew...
Harry: *Goes pale* This is wrong on so many levels...
He will
be our sacrifice.”
Draco: I thought only medevil socerers sacrificed virgins?
The blood in my veins runs cold.
Harry: Snapes blood is already cold
Hermione: So are rapists...
A sacrifice! I have to choose my way.
Draco: Huh?
Harry: Maybe its one of those stories where you get to pick your action, and then go to the corresponding
page.
Hermione: I hated those. I always ended up dying.
I can loose my love,
Harry: How do you loose someone?
Draco: Maybe its a rape thing...
this small, innocent child, and be a spy
Hermione: Ah, so this is after Snape turned spy. Which lets us know how old he truly is
Harry: And how pedophilic...
, or I can run away with him, and ruin it all.
Ron: Ruin WHAT all? The chance to see him die?
I chose the
latter.
Harry: Technically, if you ruin everything then hed die anyway, or he wouldnt be ruined.
I will ruin everything just for him. I will kill for him, even kill myself, if it works for
him. Just not hurt him…
Draco: This is SO wrong. Really. Truly, really, truly wrong.
Hermione: Wasnt Snape willing to rape the kid?
“Severus, my dear slave, are you listening?” Came the amused tone of the Dark Lord.
Harry: Somehow I doubt being ignored amuses Voldemort
Draco: Amused tone? Think more of ‘enraged “Avada Kervada”!’
“I’m sorry…I…”
Harry: Am a sick freak
“You want him so bad?” he laughed on his own joke.
Hermione: WHAT joke??
“Oh yes, you want him. And if you
want him, you shall do something about it.”
Draco: Who votes we just turn this off here to save our souls?
Everyone: *Raises hands*
Draco: Who wants to chew through our ropes so we can reach the projector?
Everyone: Oh... yeah.
And he motioned for the child. He was so broken,
so pale.
Draco: Voldemort was broken and pale?
Harry: Maybe this was after he nearly killed himself, and this person just sucks at continuity.
I wanted to embrace him and kiss him slowly, softly.
Ron: Whoever wrote this should be arrested. Im not kidding.
Then I kneeled in front of him, and touched his soft hair.
“P-professor???” He shrieked.
Harry: Aw man... there goes any hope that they just addressed this guy as ‘little boy’ in rememberence of the
past. Hes actually a student. And a shrieking one at that.
Hermione: I dont think Snape was a professor when he was a spy in the Death Eaters
“Finnigan…”
Ron: Oh my god! Seamus!
Harry: ...dude. That cold not be less cool.
Then I switched into whisper that nobody, but he could hear. “I want to get you
out of here. Move along, please, I can’t do it any other way.”
Hermione: Thats right, ten-hut, on the double. Strip down and prepare for rodgering. This is so disgusting...
Then I slowly undressed him in
Hermione: Ew.
front of the hungry eyes I opened his robe and tugged down his jeans.
Hermione: Ew!
Then slowly he was guided to a char and I toke him in my mouth.
Hermione EW!
Draco: ...with Hermione pretty catatonic, Ill point out that it should be ‘chair’ and ‘took’. And there should
be a period
He was the sweetest boy.
Harry: Did Snape honestly just comment on the taste of Seamus’ dicks
He mewed and gave gasps of pure pleasure.
Draco: Or how bought not.
He looked like he
would cry,
Hermione: Now why the fuck would he do that? How about being raped by an adult as a minor surrounded
by other men??
Harry: Did you just say fuck?
Hermione: ...you heard me.
Draco: Speaking of this, I dont think all of the Death Eaters are any more gay than Voldemort.
but he wanted me!
Harry: Even I dont hate snape enough to make a comment that this was him writing out a wish fulfillment
story.
Wanted me to do what I was doing. He never said a word of it.
Hermione: Could that be because hed be killed? This sounds like the ‘didnt say “no!” through the gag” rapist
defense.
I felt guilty,
Hermione: Oh REALLY!?
I think, he was thinking about getting out of here.
Harry: Or dying. Or anything besides what youre doing. Bloody idiot.
Draco: Who votes we switch our comments away from the disgusting horror that is this fic and concentrate
on verbally injuring the author?
Hermione/Harry/Ron: *Raise Hands*
He knew I won’t hurt him…
Draco: And how would he know that? Did you inspire trust by sucking his dick in front of a gaggle of
pedophilic perverts. This goes beyond out of characterism or plot holes, this is sheer idiocy.
And he was so beautiful when he came.
Hermione: On sheer physics of the thing, Snape wouldnt have the best view right now...
Draco: And dont guys look ugly as sin when they blow their load?
His small body tight and hard, his mouth in a
perfectly shaped “O”,
Harry: Erm, that last part would be you snape. No sound in the English language is produced by making
your mouth a perfect “O”.
Draco: Except an odd sounding warble...
and he gave the beautiest sound I heard ever…
Draco: Woah. Snape has a thing for odd sounding warbles.
I felt bad that he had to
do it here and now,
Hermione: *Rubs her temples* Now why would he feel BAD?! This is only breaking thirteen different laws
but it wouldn’t be the same with Lucius…
Draco: For the record, my father is straight. He had me.
He would’ve abused him…
Draco: Sure, with a stick or something...
Still, I felt like a beast as I swallowed his come,
Hermione: The beast instict kicks in only now?
so sweet,
Hermione: Ew...
but deep down I felt bitter. I felt
like crying.
Harry: Actually, Im pretty sure Seamus feels like crying.
Draco: For once were in perfect agreement, Potter
I touched his warm cheek and kissed him, softly, delicately.
Draco: Before exploding in a hail of red mist as the Aurors blow his ass up. The End.
Harry: I would pay for that ending at this point
Sweet little boy, he kissed back,
Hermione: ...Im going to be sick
anything to be out. It felt cheapened… A kiss for getting out.
Harry: WHAT!?!?
He never once liked me? He just
wants to get out, nothing more.
Harry: This... this boggles the mind! I mean my god, I hate Snaoe more than anyone, but this goes beyond
even his basic stupidity!
You promised it to him, and he does it to get out.
Hermione: *Withering sigh* ... as a point of fact, Snape never really promised anything.
I whispered a soft sorry, and started to beat him.
Harry: Yikes. That was unexpended.
Draco: You dont sound overly surprised...
Harry: I think IM all shocked out
“Like that? You slut! You kiss and mew like a good little girl! You want it!” I bellowed. It
was a show of course, but deep down I felt something stir… I was half- right.
Harry: I stand corrected.
He went along
just too well.
Hermione: Hes trying not to die. The way their describing Seamus, hes not even old enough to have hit
puberty yet, yet alone have come into a lust for disgusting old men
I beat him into a bloody pulp.
Draco: Owch. Thank god this part isnt descriptive.
So sorry…
Hermione: (Bitterly) <Seamus> Oh, it all right. Just pick up my tooth there... oh, and theres a piece of my
shattered innocence.
“Severus, dear…”
Harry: Voldemort does not call people dear.
Said the Dark Lord as I delivered the final punch.
Draco: Heyhey! Basic plot hole cheap ass timing!
“I’m…”
Harry: About to die for disobeying the Dark Lord?
“You shall go into your room and then to the cell, and right what you wronged.
Harry: Ah...so Voldemort is grounding Snape. Makes so much sense
I’m
disappointed.
Hermione: Me too...
You nearly killed it.”
Harry: Since when did Voldemort care when something was half alive?
Then he motioned for the dementors to take out the boy.
Hermione: Is anyone else completely lost for time frame here?
I went into my room.
Harry: Wee.
I searched for my things.
Harry: Did someone hide them?
Everything was there, we will get out of it.
Harry: Now what the hell does that mean?
Hermione: I think hes talking about him and Seamus running for it
Harry: Ah.
I went to his cell, they let me in.
Hermione: Jesus this is getting trasparent. They opened the door. I went our the door. I got a gun. I loaded
the gun. I aimed the gun at Tiger for making us read this.
I had to look up at him, his eyes full of fear, hate and
betrayal.
Harry: Shouldnt he look down, unless the little boy student towers above snape?
How he stiffened and shrunk away from my touch… I helped him to sit up
Hermione: Well now we know hes not above Snape.
Draco: Maybe he dropped lower suddenly through a plot hole.
, and smeared my
salves on his skin.
Harry: Draco, if you play porno music, there’s going to be trouble.
Draco: ...got ya.
He was better in minutes.
Hermione: Ah yes. The good old ‘Healed in seconds from near death as a way of progessing the story’ salve.
I think thats in our Herbology book.
“The salve will heal you completely in five minutes.” I whispered.
Harry: Isnt he healed already?
Hermione: And dont the people around notice whats going on? He apparently needs to whisper.
” We need to get out. I’m
sorry, I’m really am for the beating,
Draco: <Snape> The rape, well, that Im not so sorry for
but I had to get you out of it.
Harry: This story makes a lot of references to some big elusive ‘it’
Afetr you’re completely
healed I will transform you into a cat.
Hermione: Afetr?
Harry: *Shugs*
You have to come after me, we will get out in no time,
ok?”
Draco: Why is the cat even necessary? If no ones around so you can transform him, he could just run out.
The boy looked at me, his eyes filled with tears.
Draco: And his lazer vision sliced me into pieces, killing me instantly. The end.
Harry: Im starting to rather enjoy your bloody death endings.
Draco: Me too.
“I can’t thank you enough what you do for me…”
Hermione: Must... resist... screaming... about... sickening... emotional... flaws...
Harry: Instead, just refer back to the ‘fear, hurt, betrayal’ and such in the boys eyes.
I had to cut in.
Draco: In case Seamus was about to say something even dumber
“You’re healed.”
Hermione: As if Snape would notice before the boy that his massive bloody wounds were gone.
I cast a spell first at the four dementor in front of the cell and then at him.
Harry: What spell would that be? A patronus? If so, we heard amazingly little about it. If there’s something
else possible to use, Id love to hear it. Bloody sheet wearing freaks...
He turned into a beautiful cat.
Hermione: Does anyone else find it a little odd you need to train for years to become an anigmus, but can
transform someone youve just met into the animal of your choice?
Draco: *Mutters* Moody did it to me, the prick
Hermione: Yes, but hes an Auror, and I bet its a darn useful trick he trained with
I wanted to pet it,
Harry: *Snickers* Aw... pet the fluffy kittems sexy boy who I just sucked in a room full of dirty old meeen...
but we had to be quick. I led the way till we
got out.
Hermione: Where was this lack of description during the rape scene?
Then I searched for my broom.
Harry: “Accio” works well.
Draco: Unless hes been carrying the bloody thing for his coat all this time, at which point he shouldnt have
to search
I changed him back and we hopped up on it.
Hermione: Theyd go faster if he was still a cat.
The
broom sped up and we were miles away in no time.
Harry: Even my Firebolt doesnt take me miles in ‘no time’. Hell, the Snitch is hard enough to catch.
I felt his soft, hands around me. I felt his body heat
Harry: Wouldnt the cold of going miles in seconds negate body heat?
, and I had to sped up
Hermione: Oh. Big points of. ‘Had to’ and ‘sped’ right next to each other. Big mistake.
, to be there at
Hoghwarts
Hermione: Wow. They arent bad at typing, their just ignorant of Hogwarts true spelling.
sooner because I won’t be able to control myself. I wanted to kiss him, to take him
as mine. To have him forever…
Hermione: And, once again- Ew.
***
I stood mute as he was hugged and kissed, he was there again. Albus was happy and said it
didn’t matter, they had Draco to spy for us.
Hermione: Snape wasnt teaching Draco and spying at the same time
Harry: And Dracos only twelve, at the most, at this time
Draco: And Im not dumb enough to spy on anyone.
It was the best thing to do to bring Seamus back.
I lowered my head as he looked at my direction.
Harry: At this point Id be fleeing to avoid being arrested
But then I heard his voice in front of me.
Draco: <Seamus> Your going to get what I got quite a lot in Azkaban you sick freak.
“Professor… I… I want to thank you that…”
Harry: ...I liked Dracos a lot better
Hermione: Same here.
Draco: Im wishing that this person deleted every other line of this story, so none of this truly happened like
we think it did.
“Thank what?” I asked bitterly. “That I humilated you in front of the Death Eaters? That I
sucked you off and made you…”
Hermione: Woah! Professor! Keep in mind Dumbledore is riiight there.
“…I thank you that you helped me, and you were so good to me… You… you are a better
person that you show of yourself.
Harry: Awfully lingual for a twelve year old whos been traumatized, isnt Seamus?
I know, and I’m sorry that I thought anything else.
Draco: Three year olds being offered candy arent that forgiving...
I just
want to say that I can never pay you back for everything you did for me…”
Draco: <Seamus> Except for this! Avada Kervada!!
He lowered his
head and blushed.
“You did it already.”
Hermione: Please god no. Please god no.
“I…? How?” He looked at me, eyes wide and disbelieving.
“You let me touch you. You let me kiss you. It was more than enough.”
Hermione: Thaaats it. Hermione has left the building. Good night everyone. *Closes her eyes and tilts her
head up to face the ceiling*
Then I left him there,
with his beautiful mouth gaping open, my dark robes swaying after me. Like a dark shadow…
Harry: Ive never described my own robes swaying as anything mysterious... just dusty.
A dark shadow nobody knows and nobody needs…
Hermione: No one knows any dark shadow in the entire world.
But why does it hurt much to know it?…
Draco: Because you realize what you did?
End. Or not. It is up to you. Ask me and I’ll write an another part to it..
Harry: ...Im almost afraid to ask. Closing thoughts?
Hermione: Grammar wasnt bad, but there were some terrible typos. The random ‘enter’ key smacks just
confused me and made this worth. Trust me, in MST form, it doesnt look half as bad as it used to.
Harry: Well, it included, but was not limited to, to altered time frames, plot holes, pedophelia, rape. And on
a side note, a child being raped by a mans a lot scarier than being raped by a women, which makes the fact
he thanked him at the end even sicker.
Draco: And it was homophobic...
Harry: ...?
Draco: Well it was! It represented every evil person in the story as a gay man!
Harry: ...I suppose. Wheres Ron?
Draco/Hermione: *Look at his seat*
Draco: *Holds up a frayed robe* Looks like he chewed his way out...