Draco: We didnt mention it you dumb bitch, you did.
Hermione: Oh dont be so snappish. Tiger promised us a short one because of the hell of the last three.
Draco: Bullshit... hes just too lazy to do more. Besides, do you remember that ‘short’ Weasley incest one?
Ron: *Shudders*
I DO own Harry Potter.
Harry: If that was true, less people would know about me then have seen Drawing Flies
Ron: Have seen what?
Harry: See?
Draco: *Porn Music*
Harry: ...huh?
Draco: Drawing Flies. Flies. Get it?
Harry: ...unfortunately, I do.
'cept not. Dammit. I hate you all. :p
Draco: The feeling is mutual.
It was a lovely spring day.
Harry: Oh, what, now the *day* is a Mary Sue? I swear to god Ill cut the day from ear to ear!
The flowers smelled of sweet honey, and the birds chirped happily.
Harry: ...I was kidding, but the day *is* a Mary Sue
Hermione: I would love to be direction to the non-sweet honey.
Tom Riddle was pissed off.
Ron: Now theres description for you. Dont over do it pal, its easy to bore your readers with these tedius
pages of description and detail.
James and Lily were making out again, in the the bushes.
Draco: Why would they need to be in the bushes? Since they *live* in the school, I highly doubt there are
bans against kissing.
(and yes, those 2 sentences are related)
Harry: Oohh... author narration suddenly inserted. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.
He threw a dung-bomb at them.
Hermione: Why is it always Dung Bombs? Be original people! Read just *one* of Grindylowes fics and she
revels in the creativity the wizarding world gives her.
Ron: Even *canon* items are more diverse than this.
Now James was pissed off too.
Harry: Whoever didnt understand that already... well, get a CAT scan.
*Later that very same day*
Harry: Really? There wasnt a week pause for the confrontation?
Draco: Im surprised he waited more than thirty seconds.
"What did you do that for?"
Draco: No, no, no. The correct answer is ‘uppercut, stomach shot, flailing blows to the head, kick to the
temple’.
"I'm mean!"
Ron: Dung Bombs arent mean, dung bombs are annoying.
Draco: Acid Buckets... those are a little mean
"But why?"
Harry: Great... my family line has a history of hard of hearing.
"I'm angsty!"
Harry: And crappy rivals.
"But why?"
Harry: And stupidity.
"Because. because... um.. I want to anally rape you?"
Hermione: Oh... I get it. This is one of those pathetic attempts at comedy. There should be a word for them.
Draco: *Holds up sign*
Hermione: Hm... Hilarisuck. I like it.
"oh, I'm sorry."
Hermione: I love how bad grammar goes with bad writing. It creates a neat little ball of stupidity.
*awkward pause*
Draco: Yeah. That seems slightly appropriate.
"well... um.. I'll be seeing you then.. Okay?
Harry: That, however, not so appropriate. Running, maybe.
"okay.."
*many years later*
Tom Riddle became Voldie, and killed James Potter and Lily.
How Sad.
The end.
Okay.
Draco: See? It was short, but its just compacted, compressed evil
Hermione: Next time Tiger says hes doing us a favor Im kicking him in the crotch.
Ron: Ditto.
Harry: ...that works for final thoughts.