Author: Jilhaji (jilhaji@hotmail.com)
Pairing: SSxHP
Rating: R
Warnings: yaoi, sex in later chapters, angst, male pregnancy
Disclaimers: I don’t own either of these two, more’s the pity. If you can
find a way to deliver Snape to me, I will be your eternal servant
Harry: We wouldn't do that. Not even to a bastard like Snape.
Harry tossed and turned, breathing heavily and clutching at his stomach. The
thin sheen of sweat on his body and the clinging sheets twisting tightly
around his body, he thrashed and whimpered. Pain and anger fought a bitter
battle across his flushed face, and tears slowly slipped from between his
eyelids and marched solemnly down his face, just as blood slowly trekked down
his palms from the places where his nails dug into the soft flesh.
Draco: Oh goody another Potter-angst-fest.
Hermione: Maybe this one will be better.
Harry: [Looking pale] I've read a head.. It just gets worse.
*flashback*
“No! Harry, I will not hear of it! Remus and I are agreed on this for once.
You make a choice this instant. Pick between him and us...because there is no
way that we can accept this! I’m willing to do anything to protect you from
him, the bastard!” An angry Sirius Black paced and gestured fervently. He
seemed about ready to kill something.
Draco: Due to the fact that Sirius is raving like a lunatic I'm guessing your
with either me or Snape.
Ron: Snape? Ugh.....
Harry cowered on the couch, with his knees tucked to his slim torso, tears in
his eyes. “Sirius…I can’t...please don’t make me do this. I love-“
Harry: Oh goody. I love it when authors portray me like a wimpy 16 year old
girl.
“No! Harry, listen to us! Please…we love you. And-“ Remus tried to stay calm
for the sake of his young step-godson, but Sirius was still furious.
Hermione: Step-godson?
“Harry! That prick has been using you! You have to see that! I am going to
kill him if he so much as lays a finger on you. It’s your choice, but as much
as I love you, I’ll never speak to you again if you go through with this.”
Sirius stormed out of the room and out of the house. Remus went to Harry and
wrapped the boy in his arms. They could hear Sirius zooming away from the
house on his motorcycle.
Draco: Oh yeah good parenting here. I'll kick you out cause I don't like
your boyfriend.
Harry: Is it even worth pointing out that Sirius would not act like this?
Hermione: We know Sirius dislikes Snape but I doubt he'd actually try to
physcially harm him.
Ron: Uh...he did try to kill him 5th year.
“Let him calm down, Harry. I’m angry, but I love you, and this must hurt.
But, you have to understand that we cannot support this. He is not right for
you, and you will realize that eventually. It will be easier for us all if
you just end it now. We’ll help you, and you’ll get over this.” Remus spoke
quietly while rocking the young man in his arms.
Hermione: Yes you'll get over your boyfriend who we forced you to break up
with in the first place.
“I can’t…what would I do? Please…” Harry’s voice trailed off into sobs.
Harry: I'm guessing the first thing the author did was to remove every
characters spine.
Draco: Well you could stand up for yourself.
Ron: That would mean he's in character.
“You’ll find a way, but do it soon. Sirius cares for you quite a lot, but he
will kill Severus if you don’t. You know how protective he is, and he is
being serious. This is wrong. It can’t be, and you have to accept that.”
Remus’ voice was calm, but Harry knew that Remus was as dead-set against him
as Sirius was.
Draco: Holy Crap! It is Snape!
Ron: Must control urge to vomit...
Harry: I would like to know why I'm dating a guy old not only enough to be my
father, but one who hates me with a passion.
*end flashback*
Harry sat straight up in bed, breathing heavily. The tears did not stop, and
the sobs that shook his frame were filled with pain and suffering. He
suddenly felt the pain in his palms, and stopped crying long enough to
untangle himself from the bed and to make it to the small bathroom attached
to his room. He washed the blood from his hands and quickly wrapped gauze
around his palms. He raised his eyes to the mirror and roughly wiped the
tears from his eyes, self-hatred glaring back at him from the glass. He
lowered his hand to his swollen stomach and thought back to the episode
following the one in his dream, the last time he had seen his love.
Draco: Yeah we get more chapters of Harry's whining!
Harry: Yes I always sit in bed crying over Snape.
* flashback*
“Sev…we have to talk.” Harry gave his lover a slight smile, his face
appearing much more confident than he actually felt.
Harry: I will never, ever under any circumstances think of Snape as my lover.
Ron: Thank god!
“That’s never a good way to start a conversation. Is something wrong with-
?” Sev reached to take his younger partner into his arms, but Harry stepped
back and calmly pushed him back.
Harry: Down the stairs, into a pit of spikes...
Draco: Dark today aren't we?
“No. Everything is fine in that department, but I do have something to tell
you.” Sev quirked an eyebrow, innocently unsuspecting of the painful verbal
blow about to fall. “I lied to you. I’m sorry, but…it’s not yours.” Severus
crumpled, falling back to rest against the wall, disbelief plainly evident on
his face.
Hermione: What isn't his?
Draco: You don't want to know....
“No…no! That’s not true. That can’t be true! Tell me it’s not true.”
Desperation and agony made speedy appearances, and Harry stood there calmly,
the picture of indifference. There was no sign of the love and devotion that
Sev was used to finding there.
Draco: I doubt Snape has ever had look of love and devotion in his life.
Harry: And if he did it wasn't for me.
“Stop whimpering. You’re a grown man. Read my lips, Sev. I don’t love you.
This isn’t your baby, and I’m leaving you because I can’t stand this
anymore. It was fun, but…not enough.
Ron: HOLY SHIT! YOUR PREGNANT?!
Harry: There seem to be a lot of these around.
Hermione: I'd think Snape should be more worried about how he got a 16 year
boy pregnant then having said boy leaving him.
Draco: I would like to know how that little genetic miralce happened.
” Harry managed to keep up the act, but inside he was screaming at himself
and holding in the desperate desire to reach out and comfort his lover.
Instead, he turned his back and walked away, out the door and out of Severus
Snape’s life. Once he reached the end of the hallway, he turned and saw his
former lover curled up just inside their door, sobbing and broken. Harry
spoke quietly, only to himself, “I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…”
Draco: Who are these people? Did the author even read the book?
Harry: The only way Snape would be 'sobbing and broken' was if he was reading
this fic!
*end flashback*
Harry wiped his face for a final time and quietly walked back to the bed,
praying that sleep would come again and bring happier thoughts this time.
Instead of blessed sleep and peace, however, all he got were more tears and
memories. It had been 4 months since he had walked out that door, and he had
yet to have a full night’s sleep. He didn’t know what to do, because,
despite Remus’ assurances, he still hadn’t healed. He still loved Severus,
and he didn’t know how he was going to survive this.
Harry: Due to the fact that I've somehow transformed to a 16 year old girl.
Draco: I would like to know how a BOY would survive pregnancy.
He loved Sirius and Remus dearly, and both of them were being the perfect
guardians now that he had put Sev behind him. They were all he could ever
want, even if Sirius still glared anytime the father of Harry’s child came
up. He could never do anything to hurt them, but the memory of his love in
that doorway kept haunting him. The thought that he had broken Sev’s heart,
even as his own was breaking wouldn’t let him rest. He had realized at that
moment that there was no way that Sev was using him or faking his emotions,
but he couldn’t go back to him. He couldn’t risk Sirius’ anger, or losing
both of his godfathers.
Harry: I like to think Sirius and Remus would be more concerned with the fact
that they're godSON is pregnant.
Ron: I can assure you wizard males do not have babies!
So instead, he lay awake at night and wallowed in his sorrow and self-
hatred. He had to keep up the façade, because the entire world seemed to be
concerned with his well-being, and that of the child that would be born in
the next three months. He couldn’t let anyone know how he really felt,
especially not the people he cared about. His child’s other father would
remain unknown, and the real father would have to remain unknowing. That was
the way things had to be, but Harry vowed that he would love his child no
matter what, because the small life within him was all that remained of his
beloved.
Hermione: The child should have a Mother. I can assure Harry does not have
the proper equipment to have one.
Harry: My beloved.....
______
Final thought...
Harry: What is with Mpreg fics?
Hermione: No real errors but massivly OOC.