Draco: Oh dear God...
Hermione: Make the hurting stop!
Harry: First time back and she picks a real winner
Icz: Hey!
~*~*~*~*~*~
~ Sitting on the Knight Bus. I am ONLY writing this to humor mom. I’ll probably even throw this stupid diary away!!!! She’s watching me, and I want to tell her its really obvious, but I don’t want to be rude. I’ll pretend to write crap crud so she’ll think I’m a good child.
Hermione: Yes curse your mother for trying to encourage your creativity!
Harry: Who is this girl? Why is she on the Night Bus, why the fuck should we care?
Draco: She's the all powerful Mary Sue! Of course we'd know by her annoying personality.
So bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla
Harry: How long is she gonna do this?
Draco: It beats, you know, doing an actual story.
Hermione: Make it stop, make it stooop!
bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla.
Harry: That only took forever and a fucking day!
Draco: Stop it Potter your starting to grow on me.
Ron: What'd I miss?
Hermione: The worst three minutes of my life.
OK, I’m officially bored. But mom wants me to write for a half and hour, and those blas only took ten minutes.
Ron: You could've actually written something that doesn't induce vomiting.
Ugh. Ok, my mom want me to use this diary as “a vent for my frustrations.”
Draco: Here's my bat which I will use to 'vent' my frustrations on you goddamn skull!
Harry: Can I help?
This is the 9th time we’ve moved, and mom though all this moving was a little rough on me, so she took us to a family counselor, and she told mom we should both keep diary’s. But I don’t think that mom believes that vent thing anymore than I do. And the wordst part about the “family counselor” was that her name was Miss Kinnard. ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? HELLO????
Hermione: Because only when a woman is married can she be of use to society.
Harry: So things like schooling and training don't matter, you just have to be married.
Ron: I think I'm gonna be sick.
How is an unmarried old lady supposed to help actual families? Society today is skrewed. The reason we have moved nine times is cuz of mom’s job. She owns her own magazine company, The Weekly Review. I think she picked a retarded name, but people still like it, I guess.
Draco: Unless her magazine comes out monthly and she just writes blahs in the columns I don't see how it's a bad name.
They sell it on magazine stands in Diagon Alley. But I've been thinking that we moved this time because mom wants me to get it to the school she went to. It’s called Hog somethin-or-other.
Ron: Hog-WARTS its not that hard.
Hermione: Anything to save her from doing actual work on this horrid piece of filth.
She says it the best school England has to offer. So I was all, “why can’t I go to a school in America?” And she was all, “you’re British, and you will attend a British school.” Yeah right. So I was born in England. I was raised mostly in America, and I speak like a true Californian, as she does most of her magazine-type business there.
Hermione: So she talks ike a self-obsessed moron?
Draco: Was there any doubt.
Who cares about all that citizen type stuff. I am an American. And I miss my friends a ton. I’ve been living in San Francisco for about four years, and I thought I was there to stay, as I had lived in all they other places for less than a year apiece. And probably the only reason we move so much is cuz there’s only two of us; me and my mom, my mom and I. We’re compact, which makes things a lot easier.
Harry: We fit easily into suitcases and can ship ourselves via FedEx.
asked her so many time who my dad was, where may dad was, etc, but she’s never told me. I stopped asking when I was 8; I knew it was pointless. But I still wonder...
Draco: Why he didn't smother you at birth?
My mom’s name is Hermione Granger, and she’s really skrewed up, behind that professional business woman costume, that is. She’s lost contact with all her friends from school, if she had any.
Hermione: NOOOOOOO! GOD NOOO!
Harry: The time I was being tortured by Voldemort was more fun than this.
Draco: Ha ha!
And also, she sometimes gets these letters that make her go up to her room and cry. You know, the biggest difference between my mom and me is he main goal in life is to get TONS of work done. Mine, however, is to par-tay.
Draco: And hopefully dying painfully of a drug overdoes.
I LOVE hanging out with friends, which is probably why I was sad enough about leaving Cali for mom to send us to counseling. HOLY HOT DOGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did you know I’ve been writing for a half and hour????????? Anyone who got hold of this thing could write a book entitled The Life of Tara Granger. But never mind, I wont EVER write in this thing again!!!!! So long, farewell, auf wiedersein and GOOD BYE.
Harry: Just don't fucking write again as a gift to humanity!
Final Thoughts:
Harry: Dear God does the author think we'll actually care about this whiny, empty-headed bitch?
Icz
~*~*~*~*~*~
Little liar, your gonna be writing in this dairy A LOT more than you think!
Please reply!!!! Should I continue??? Are you interested???? Reply if you wanna eventually know who Tara’s dad is!!!!!!!!!