It was during my college years that I met the love of my life Shara. The day, 8th Aug 1990, still lingers in my mind. The time was around 3.30 in the after noon. My brother had organized a party for his marriage the day before and I was returning home after settling dues with the event management company, with my buddies, Vinod, Sanjeev, Sacchi, Sudheer, driving fathers' vintage Morris Minor, known in India as 'Ambassador'. I was at wheel, and at a distance I saw some four five girls coming from the opposite side. All of them were really pretty. I could identify one girl as Kuku, sister of Vinod. But one other girl caught my attention. I put my foot down on gas pedal and on brakes. Car skidded across burning rubber and throwing up dust and coming to a standstill just in front of the girls, startling them. Girls were all scared and were furious. I felt happy for my car control and for teasing the girls. I saw a girl, the girl who caught my attention in the first place coming forward, in anticipation of meeting that girl, I opened my door and got out of the car. What followed then is a terrible tongue lashing that you can ever get. May be I was lucky for not being bashed up by that beauty. I wouldn't have complained even if I got one. I got bit scared, but was smiling. I could not say anything but to look at that beautiful girl I ever met. I could not hear any thing ( may be I didn't want to :>) but to enjoy that beauty. I was standing stone cold mesmerized by her. Firing ceased slowly and I was still in a world of my own. My stone cold reaction, confused her. From her behind Kuku came forward, "Hey Suji, what happened". The beautiful girl was surprised, " Do you know this guy". Kuku replied "Of course, he is friend of my brother". Just then Vinod got of the car. The girl knew Vinod earlier. Later Kuku introduced me to the girl as Sharavathy. Shara told me that " Sorry for that, I didn't know you knew Kuku." I replied "Well what ever it was, I liked your attitude". We all had a good laugh, talked for a while a left. The thought about Shara kept me awake all through the nights that followed.
I was sure of one thing I needed to meet her again. Kerala is an orthodox society and speaking with girls out of colleges was not encouraged by the society. But I had to meet her. I came to know through Vinod that Shara will be coming to his house to meet Kuku. I went to Vinod's house in the pretext of meeting Vinod. I saw her with Kuku and couple of other friends at Vinod's house. "Hey Shara, quite a surprise, I didn't expect to see you here. How are you doing'' I asked. I could see that she was happy to see me too. We talked for a while. I could feel that she is the one for me. I made up reasons for meeting her, like going to her college in the pretext of visiting my old professors. I used to ride by her college in my Honda just in time when her college is over for. I needed to bunk my classes to meet her. Her college was very far from my college and I needed to dash down to meet her.
In India we follow the custom of arranged marriage. In a arranged marriage the onus of searching the bride or a bridegroom rests with the parents and the children usually marry the one chosen by their parents. It is quiet normal in India that bride and groom can get to know each other only after the engagement. Almost 90% of the marriages happen in India as an arranged marriage. Sociologists believe that is the reason for the lesser number of divorces happening in India compared to any where else.
We found that we were related to each other through a distant relation, really a remote relation. I could see no reason why my parents will object to it. One day I asked my mother whether she knew Shara's mother. She knew her and my mom sensed that I like Shara. I told to Shara that I love her and I think she is the one for me. All these things happened in a space of couple of months. I knew Shara liked me, but she did not say an 'Yes' to me as the decision for her marriage is supposed to take by her parents. I was in a dilemma. I needed Shara so much in my life I understood that my life would be incomplete with out her. I decided to visit her parents. I took all my courage and went to her house just to see her as a friend.. To my relief her parents welcomed to their house. I spoke to Shara's parents and came home. Later I introduced Shara to my folks.
We had a highly active courtship. It was difficult for us not to see each other. In India it is not considered as a good sign for a Guy and girl to meet and talk before marriage. It was difficult for us not to meet each other. We never missed any occasions in each others family to meet each other. We used to spend hours over telephone and used to write letters every day. I felt like and still feels like to be on top of the world when I am near her. We got married in the winter or 1995 on Dec 10th. We celebrate two anniversaries one for the day we met Aug 8th and the other for our marriage Dec 10th.
On a holiday
when we visited a beutiful
waterfalls in Malaysia
