Alice watched in amusement as Helena stood at her desk, slightly bent over as she cradled the phone between her shoulder and ear on what was obviously an important phone call while simultaneously typing an email one-handed and carrying on a silent conversation with the blonde as she mouthed an apology for the delay, and doing all this while trying to put on her suit jacket.

Finally, Helena hung up the phone and turned to face Alice triumphantly, only to realize she managed to ravel herself around the phone cord when she put on her suit jacket. "Oh…" Helena muttered under her breath when she realized she'd managed entangle herself. "How…"

Alice moved forward to see what was going on and laughed uproariously.

"Darling!" Helena exclaimed in indignation.

Alice sat on the ground and laughed as she stared at Helena.

"I don't see the humor in this, Alice!" Helena exclaimed, though she chuckled as well. "My phone broke this morning, as you are aware," Helena said, spinning around in an effort to untangle herself, but finding she only became more ensnared. "And this archaic piece of machinery was the only thing that was readily available in the office," Helena complained, lifting up the very old phone and holding it up for Alice to see and shaking it for good measure.

Alice's eyes widened and then laughed even harder at Helena's "archaic piece of machinery" comment, as she doubled over on the floor and slapped at the ground. "Oh my God," Alice wheezed. "You called a telephone an "archaic piece of machinery" like it was some instrument of torture in the Spanish Inquisition."

Helena pulled furiously at the cord but found it was fruitless. "There is nothing funny about the Spanish Inquisition," Helena said petulantly, a sure sign she was embarrassed. "It was a very dark time in history."

Alice exploded with laugher. "Oh my God," she gasped. She laughed long and hard and grabbed at her stomach which was beginning to hurt from laughing.
Helena pulled at the phone. "I'll wager it's been in this office since before I was born," she whined. "I don't know why we would keep this old thing around, we should have a newer phone as a spare."

Alice laughed and then stood up, and still laughing hard, walked over to her girlfriend as she tried to aid in Helena's attempt to extricate herself from the phone cord.

"How did you do this?" Alice asked, laughing. "I mean, it's tangled up in your hair!"

Helena gave Alice a mock-outraged look, biting back her own laughter as could see the humor in the situation as well. She gently whapped at Alice's arm. "Please do refrain from mocking my habit of getting tangled up in phone cords, darling."

Alice pulled her hands away from Helena to regard the British woman for a moment. "Wait a minute. Habit?"

Helena blushed and then gazed down at the ground. "Darling, please untangle me!"

Alice gasped for air as she laughed. "How often do you do this?" she asked, pulling at the phone cord.

"Not often," Helena said defensively. "I have cordless phones."

For some reason, the way Helena said it made Alice laugh even harder. "You know, I thought you would be the first kid on the block to get a cordless phone because you know, you had money and you're so technologically advanced," Alice teased, picking up Helena's leather bound organizer off the desk and holding it up.

Helena rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "I don't do well with Palm pilots!"

"But now I see that your family had to go cordless as soon as cordless phones became available or else you'd strangle yourself with them and then you'd never be able to carry on the proud Peabody name. Although now that we have Wilson and Jun Ying…" Alice pretended to look thoughtful before she grinned at Helena and kissed her on the nose. She pulled the cord over Helena's head. "You're free!" she exclaimed with a giggle.

Helena chuckled, though her cheeks were still tinged with a bit of a blush. She was still a little embarrassed, but there was no one she'd rather make a fool of herself in front of than Alice. "Thank-you for saving me from a fate of accidental self-strangulation by telephone cord," Helena said very seriously though her eyes were bright with good humor and affection.

Alice burst into laughter once again, laughing so hard, she leaned against Helena for support. "You're cute," she said warmly, once she caught her breath. She smoothed out Helena's hair which had become disheveled. "You're lucky you straightened your hair last night, think about how hard it would have been to get out of your hair otherwise."

Helena looked petulant. "I'm aware of how difficult it would have been," she said, crossing her arms and pretending to look sullen.

Alice grinned and brought her face close to Helena's and rubbed their noses together. "I know you are, what, with you making it a habit of getting into fights with phone cords and losing, but I still think you're pretty," she teased, pushing their foreheads together and grinning when Helena grudgingly began laughing.

Helena gently cupped Alice's cheek. "Well, you did save me," she said softly, the words laden with meaning. Helena peered into Alice's eyes and the two women gazed at one another for a brief moment before Helena pressed her lips against Alice's in a slow, languid kiss.

After a few minutes, they reluctantly pulled apart. "Let's go, darling," Helena said with a pleasant grin. "So I can feed you."

"So, we're definitely going to Shua May?" Alice asked, her eyes shining. "I love their food and I love that fifty topping shaved ice dessert. We can get that, right?"

Helena looked amused. "Of course we can, don't we always share one?"

Alice grinned as she followed Helena out of her office into the hallway. "Well, don't go trying to bogart all the topping again."

"I do not 'bogart' the toppings," Helena huffed, though she laughed. "It was only that one time when I wanted that extra strawberry!" She gently bumped Alice's hip with her own, wrapping her arms around Alice and affectionately kissing Alice on the cheek. "I hate fortune cookies," Helena commented.

Alice blinked. "Okay, and the random award goes to…"

Helena shrugged. "We're going to eat Chinese food, it reminded me I hate fortune cookies. They are not really fortunes--"

"Okay, I knew we shouldn't have watched Kissing Jessica Stein again last week," Alice joked.

Helena laughed. "Well, it was true what she said! It was an aphorism."

"Adage."

Helena blinked. "Pardon me?" she asked, turning to look at Alice as they walked toward the elevators.

"Jessica called Helen's fortune an 'adage,' not an 'aphorism.' See how many times I've seen this movie with you?" Alice teased.

Helena and Alice stopped at Helena's secretary's desk to announce Helena was stepping out for a while and to ask her if she wanted them to bring anything back for her. Once finding out she'd already brought her lunch, Helena and Alice continued their way toward the elevator, stopping by several cubicles and at the doors of several offices as people stopped Helena to ask questions or to gain input.

Helena laughed. "I hate fortune cookies," she insisted, resuming their conversation. "I'd much rather get a real fortune, such as 'you will die tomorrow in a horrifically painful traffic collision at precisely three pm' rather than--"

Helena's sentence was muffled as Alice placed her hand over Helena's mouth.

"Don't say that!" Alice exclaimed, horrified by the thought of it.

"What?" Helena asked in confusion.

"That 'you will die' stuff," Alice said. She wasn't superstitious, but she didn't like the idea of Helena saying something like that so cavalierly. It wasn't so much the death component as the 'horrifically painful' stuff--Helena really was cavalier about that sort of thing, and sometimes it troubled Alice. She shivered slightly. "It really creeps me out."

Helena chuckled. "Why? Do you think I'll die violently, darling?"

"Helena!" Alice exclaimed, slapping Helena's forearm.

"I'm sorry, darling," Helena apologized seeing that Alice truly did have an aversion to such talk.

"It's okay," Alice muttered, taking Helena's hand and rubbing it. "So…what was it?"

"Pardon?"

"You said you wanted to get…that stuff as a fortune rather than getting…" Alice shrugged off the rest of her sentence.

"Oh. I was going to say I would rather…ah, get that stuff than getting something like 'your presence brings joy to many' which on top of being an aphorism is clearly untrue," Helena laughed self-deprecatingly, as she pushed the elevator button and waved goodbye to the receptionists at the front desk who fielded all the Peabody Foundation phone calls before directing them to the appropriate department or person. It was a difficult job and Helena was grateful to them and appreciated their help greatly.

Helena paused to ask them if they wanted her to bring anything back for them, but each of them declined. Helena turned back to face Alice and was surprised when she was greeted with a gentle whap to her stomach.

"You bring joy to plenty of people," Alice said, turning to wrap her arms around Helena's waist in a half-hug. She brought her mouth close to Helena's ear. "Like last night. And this morning," she whispered suggestively, giggling when Helena blushed and giggled as well.

"Finally!" Alice exclaimed turning her head in the direction of the elevators when the bell sounded which signaled the impending opening of its doors. She turned to look at Helena when she felt Helena's body suddenly stiffen as the doors opened and the happy smile on Helena's face immediately drop and Helena's laugh die in her throat in a tiny, strangled sound. Alice turned back toward the elevators and saw the source of Helena's reaction. 'Oh fuck,' she thought.

"Hello, Helena," Peggy Peabody said, as she stepped out of the elevator and eyed Helena and Alice who were still in their half-hug with some amusement.

Helena eyes snapped to the floor and she immediately pulled away from Alice. "Hello, Mother," Helena said, looking up at Peggy, and wincing ever so slightly, her tense posture communicating her discomfort. Her right arm lay flat at her side while her left arm wrapped across her body, her left hand clutching her right elbow. She shifted awkwardly. "This is a surprise."

Peggy looked at Helena appraisingly. "Does she prefer your hair that way?" she asked with a touch of disdain as she gestured to Alice.

Helena's mouth dropped open as she searched for something to say, but the question caught her so off-guard she wasn't sure what to say. "I--"

"My preferred hairstyle for Helena is the one she chooses for herself," Alice said, standing up straight and eyeing Peggy defiantly, feeling put off by the tone Peggy was using. She wasn't sure what Peggy was trying to imply, but it was definitely either a jab at her, or at Helena and either way she didn't like it.

"I prefer her natural style," Peggy stated, eyeing Helena who was staring at the ground.

Alice shrugged and turned to smile at Helena. "I'll just take you any way I can get you," she said softly.

Helena gave Alice a small smile in return and hesitantly reached to take Alice's hand.

Alice squeezed Helena's hand gently and grinned at her reassuringly.

"Even if she's not obscenely wealthy?" Peggy asked.

Alice's eyes widened and she opened her mouth to speak.

"Mother!" Helena hissed. "Do not speak to her that way."

"Are you afraid of the answer, Helena?"

Helena blushed and glanced at Nora and Jerome, her receptionists, who were dutifully and respectfully looking away. Helena hated this aspect of her mother's personality--her mother was so concerned about the way the world perceived them, but she would try to have a conversation like this one in front of others and Helena knew it was because Peggy didn't care. Peggy thought Nora and Jerome were inconsequential merely because they were at the reception desk, when really, they kept the Foundation running, at least, the Los Angeles site. And now she had her private business broadcasted to the office.

"No," Helena said emphatically. "I'm not afraid of the answer because I'm well aware of what the answer is," she said, "Alice and I were on our way to lunch, Mother. And I've kept her waiting long enough. Perhaps we can continue this conversation when I get back."

"It'll only take a moment, Helena," Peggy said, her tone suddenly amiable.

Helena hesitated. Her mother's amiable tone after everything she'd just insinuated infuriated her, but at the same time, it was difficult for her to refuse her mother's request, and she didn't think she could have left the office and gone to lunch without first finding out what her mother wanted anyway. Still, she felt it would be a betrayal to Alice to capitulate to her mother's whims now after her mother had just implied Alice was only with her for the money.

"It's okay, Helena," Alice said, squeezing Helena's hand. "I can wait."

"But you're going to be late," Helena said quietly, her brows furrowing together. She didn't want Alice to be late in getting back to her office, after all, not everyone had the luxury of being one's own boss.

Alice chuckled. "It's okay."

"Let's speak in your office, Helena," Peggy said. "I'm sure your playmate can occupy herself here."

Helena's head snapped to attention at that. "She is not my playmate, Mother," Helena said with barely concealed rage. "There is nothing you will say to me that I won't tell Alice after you leave." Helena swallowed hard and turned to look at Alice, though she could not meet the blonde's eyes. Helena stared at her shoes. "Will you come with me?" she asked quietly, her voice cracking slightly.

Alice cupped Helena's chin and raised it so she could peer in Helena's eyes. She nodded slightly, smiling at Helena as she did so.

Helena's posture visibly relaxed and she turned back to look at her mother, waiting for her mother's reaction.

"All right, then" Peggy said agreeably.

The three women walked into Helena's office. Peggy sat down in Helena's chair while Helena and Alice took other seats.

"Have you resolved your issue with Winnie from two weeks ago?" Peggy asked.

Helena flinched. "No," she whispered. "I haven't, Mother."

Alice remained silent, but she reached out to put a hand on Helena's knee.

Peggy nodded. "I've suspected as much."

Helena flinched again and Alice moved to intervene, but was stopped when Peggy spoke again.

"I've taken care of it for you," Peggy said. "I've spoken to Winnie and she's agreed to allow the situation to remain as it is until you two meet in front of the judge."

"What?" Helena whispered. Of all the things she was expecting to hear, that was something she'd never considered even in the realm of possibility.

"She seems to be enjoying her current lifestyle," Peggy said with a measure of disgust. "And we both know Katherine Aberdeen is blind to the glaringly obvious."

Helena's expression was impassive. That felt like a dig aimed at her, because she'd been completely blind to the fact Winnie did not love her, and yet at the same time, it seemed like her mother was taking her side, which was something Helena never thought would happen. And there was a part of her that rejoiced in what her mother was saying--she wished her mother would not get involved in her personal life, but Peggy had managed to smooth things over with Winnie, albeit for a time-limited period of time, and she was grateful for that. But she was also suspicious.

"What's in it for you?" Alice asked calmly.

Helena turned to look at Alice questioningly.

Peggy looked amused. "Pardon me?"

"I don't get the impression you do things for Helena out of the kindness of your heart," Alice said, as politely as she could. "Do you have any other motives?"

"Should you be concerned with any of my motives?"

"Should Helena?" Alice asked pointedly, though she forced her tone to remain civil. She didn't want to hate Peggy, after all, she was Helena's mother, and Helena loved her and wanted her approval. But everything she'd seen and heard from Peggy, the way Peggy was never in Helena's life unless it was to berate or disparage her, the way Peggy talked down to Helena in those supercilious tones, the way Helena always felt so terrible after spending any time talking to Peggy made Alice hate her. And she didn't want to hate Peggy.

But here Peggy was, acting as though nothing had happened two weeks ago, and not even an apology for the way she treated Helena. And Alice knew it was the first time the two had spoken since that incident. It made Alice furious. And she was suspicious of Peggy's motives for helping them with Winnie. She knew Peggy would probably hate her for good after this--after all, life wasn't like in the movies where the lippy kid mouths off to the tough guy who finds the kid's moxie endearing and respects the kid for talking back. No, this was real life, and Alice was well aware that she was probably screwing herself for good and would never gain Peggy's favor, but Helena had a tendency not to defend herself with Peggy. The only time Helena had spoken back to Peggy at all in the last few minutes was to defend her, and Alice wasn't going to just sit there and let Helena be run over by Peggy. It'd happened too many times before. She just hoped it wouldn't ruin the good mood she and Helena were in before Peggy arrived. And she'd been so happy when Helena asked her to come inside the office with her, Alice hoped Helena wasn't regretting her decision now. But she really did think it had to be done, and maybe it wasn't proper or the timing was off or whatever, but it still had to be said.

"Helena never has to be concerned about my motivations," Peggy said. "Should my daughter be concerned about yours?"

"No," Alice stated plainly. "She never has to be concerned with my motivations, either."

"Well, then," Peggy said, looking at Alice appraisingly. "I suppose we're in agreement." She stood up and Helena and Alice followed suit. "I've taken care of it, Helena," she said. "At least for now. I expect you to resolve this manner in a way that will reflect well on the family."

"Yes, Mother. Thank-you," Helena said.

Peggy walked toward Helena. "I do think this hairstyle suits you," she commented, reaching out to tuck an errant strand of hair behind Helena's ear.

Helena flinched slightly as Peggy's hand came near, but did not move.

Peggy pulled her hand away before she could touch Helena, her eyes reflecting some unreadable emotion at her daughter's reaction. "I've never raised a hand to you, Helena, do spare me the theatrics."

"I know," Helena whispered. "I'm sorry." Helena smiled awkwardly at Peggy. "I am grateful for what you did, Mother," she said. She hesitantly reached out and patted her mother's arm. "Truly."

"You're welcome, Helena," Peggy said patronizingly. She gazed at Helena looking at her from head-to-toe, "although, Winnie was correct when she said you had a glow. You aren't actually pregnant and have neglected to tell me have you?"

Alice released a soft gasp. "Mrs. Peabody--"
"I'm not pregnant, Mother," Helena said flatly, knowing Alice was ready to defend her, rush to her aid at this perceived cruelty. She wanted to avoid that. "I can't carry a child full-term."

Peggy blinked. "You've never told me that."

Helena bit the inside of her cheek and stared down at the ground.

Alice sighed quietly. At first, she thought Peggy said what she did out of spite or just a complete disregard for Helena's feelings. But Peggy didn't know because Helena never told and that just made Alice feel horrible for Helena.

"Helena. You've never mentioned that," Peggy persisted.

Helena stared at the ground, trying to ward off the wave of sadness that the subject brought her. Now that it was said, she wished she'd never mentioned it. "I can get pregnant," Helena said quietly. "But I can't carry full-term. I've tried and failed multiple times." Helena swallowed hard. "So you are not likely to ever have a biological grandchild, Mother, if that's what you're implying," her voice trembling slightly because she couldn't imagine her mother ever caring about the subject except for that particular detail.

"That was not what I was implying," Peggy said simply. "I was merely complimenting your appearance, Helena. Do try to be less dramatic and stop painting me as the villain." She paused and turned her head to the side to look at Helena. "I did always wonder why you chose to let Winnie carry a child when you've always wanted to have children," Peggy said. "I suppose now I know." Peggy nodded slightly. "I'll be going now. Good-bye, Helena. We'll speak soon." Peggy turned to Alice. "Alice Pieszecki, is it?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes."

"I expect we'll be seeing more of each other."

And then Peggy was gone.

Helena and Alice stared at one another in consternation.

"That was weird," Alice said.

"Very," Helena agreed.

"You okay, baby?" Alice asked, rubbing Helena's back gently.

"I'm fine," Helena answered with a smile.

"Helena, I'm sorry I was so rude to her. I know it's not my place, but--"

"No one's ever defended me to her," Helena said, interrupting gently, raising a finger to Alice's mouth. "Thank-you," she said quietly. Granted the first time Alice and Peggy spoke to one another could have gone better, and they'd yet to be formally introduced, but Peggy knew who Alice was--Peggy didn't purposely pretend to forget Alice's name or purposely butcher its pronunciation. Peggy knew who Alice was, and Alice obviously knew who Peggy was. Peggy knew that Alice was important in her life, and Alice had been supportive of her, the blonde had not kowtowed to Peggy and for that, Helena thought the meeting could not have gone better.

Alice gazed into Helena's eyes and smiled, the corners of her eyes crinkling happily. "Well, someone's got to. So, are we still eating lunch or what?"

------------------------------

"Aren't you hungry?" Alice asked Helena quietly. "You missed breakfast this morning."

Though Helena prepared breakfast for the children, Alice and Lulu, per usual, she'd needed to get to the office earlier than usual and was running late in doing so, mainly because she was distracted by Alice in the bathroom and her morning grooming ritual became prolonged. Alice thought Helena should be hungry, but Helena was merely picking at her food and pushing it around with chopsticks in a restaurant they both loved and Alice knew why that was, but she wanted to get it out in the open. Helena was clearly distracted and lost in thought and Alice wanted the British woman to stop pulling everything inward and talk to her a little.

Helena smiled. "I'm hungry," she said, lifting up some noodles to her mouth. "Really," she said.

"You're sure you're okay?" Alice asked gently.

"I am," Helena said with a nod. "I was just…" Helena trailed off. "I was thinking about earlier," Helena said quietly. "And I wanted to apologize for the way my mother treated you," Helena said, gazing down at the table, unable to meet Alice's eyes. "What she said to you and about you was uncalled for."

Alice lightly kicked the sole of Helena's pumps under the table to gain Helena's attention. Alice smiled when Helena finally looked into her eyes. "You don't have any control of what she says," Alice said quietly. "And you stood up for me," Alice said. "Thank-you for that."

Helena was silent for a long moment before she spoke again. "Do you think I was too harsh with my mother?" Helena asked, gazing guiltily down at the table. "I don't regret what I said when it comes to you, of course, darling. But with everything else…" Helena trailed off. "I was very…impertinent with her," Helena said quietly, her words slightly tinged with regret. "And she was kinder to me than usual today. And she was right, she's never raised a hand to me, she's never abused. I really have nothing to be so theatrical about. I shouldn't have reacted so harshly. Perhaps she could have left in a better mood…" She didn't regret defending Alice, but Helena replayed the earlier events with her mother in her mind over and over again and she thought she had been a little disrespectful.

"No, I don't think you were too harsh with her," Alice said. "I hate the way she talks to you, I hate the way she treats you," Alice said, becoming increasingly upset the more she spoke.

Helena looked thoughtful as she stared at her plate, absent-mindedly playing with her food with her chopsticks. "Still," Helena said with a sigh. "She's the only parent I have left, I should have been more respectful." Helena peeked up at Alice. "No matter how dreadfully your mother treats you, you're still very respectful to her," Helena said quietly, thinking about all the phone conversations she'd been privy to that Alice had with her mother. Alice could be a little exasperated with Lenore, but she was always respectful and Helena admired that about Alice because she despised the way Lenore treated Alice, took her for granted and never seemed to have any regard for Alice's feelings.

"My mother treats me like crap," Alice agreed amiably. "But she still treats me better than your mom treats you, Helena," Alice said gently, reaching across the table to take Helena's hand. "And I don't think you were being disrespectful to her. You were standing up for yourself, and maybe you need to do that more with her, because, Helena…" Alice voice trembled ever so slightly, "she was so horrible to you today and you seem to think she treated you well or something." Alice looked into Helena's eyes. "I hate that you think she was kind to you today."

Helena still looked uncertain. "I know it could not have gone better than the way it went today," Helena acknowledged with a soft sigh, dropping her eyes and concentrating on tracing a pattern on the top of Alice's hand. "But I just feel if I were somehow different in some way, maybe it could have gone better or maybe my relationship with my mother in general would be better."

"You're not the one who should change," Alice said gently. "I don't know if I'll ever say anything that will make you believe that, but you're not the one who should change. You were totally respectful to her today, Helena. You just stood up for yourself a little."

Helena gazed at Alice for a moment. "I'm happy you were there today, darling," she said quietly. "Thank-you for coming in with me."

Alice released a shaky breath. "I'm really really glad you asked me to come in," Alice said. "I thought you would ask me to stay out." Alice smiled wryly at Helena. It was still a fear she had, that she would be shut out of the important things in Helena's life, but over the last two weeks after their first official argument as a couple, Helena made a conscious effort to be more open, coming home and sharing stories of things that'd troubled or infuriated her at work. And then Helena asked Alice to be there when Peggy talked to her. Alice thought it was a signal for good things to come. "I was scared if you were alone with her, she would get you to leave me."

Helena looked at Alice in surprise. "Darling, what would make you think that?"

Alice shrugged. "Your mom thought I was a gold digger before she even met me," Alice explained. "And I doubt her opinion has changed. I was worried your mother thought I wasn't good enough for you or something and would try to get you to break up with me." Alice paused. "I know her approval means a lot to you," she said quietly.

Helena stared down at her lap before looking Alice squarely in the eyes. "It used to," Helena acknowledged. "It does," Helena amended because she knew as many times as she told herself she would not try to seek approval from her mother because Peggy would never give it to her, she would always try to gain her mother's approval. It was like her biological imperative or something. "But you matter to me so much more than her approval," Helena said quietly. It was the first time she thought about it in the way, but now that she said it, she realized it was true. Alice was one of her few sources of genuine happiness and she wanted to keep Alice in her life because of it.

"So we're good?" Alice asked.

"We are very good," Helena confirmed with a happy grin.

After lunch, Alice and Helena dropped by a bakery to pick up some eight treasure pudding to bring back for Kit as Alice declared they must drop in at The Planet and get some coffee to ward off the impending food coma.

Though Helena and Kit had spoken several times since Kit ran into Helena at the beach, Helena still found herself still a little uneasy around the older woman. It wasn't that Kit was unkind to her--if anything, Kit was even more kind, but it just took Helena some time to feel comfortable around people but she desperately wanted to show Kit how much she appreciated the older woman's kindness toward her. Several days after Kit gave Helena a free slice of peach pie and two cups of coffee, Helena dropped in at The Planet with a Billie Holliday record Kit mentioned she once had but lost. Helena herself adored the record and wanted to replace Kit's lost record as an expression of gratitude. She'd never excelled in articulating her emotions and she found it difficult sometimes to adequately communicate her emotions--it was hard for her, and she felt clumsy and awkward when she tried. So Helena was very fond of gestures and though she knew that gestures may come across as insincere or lacking in actual emotion, it was still what she had.

So she had been a little wounded when Kit thanked Helena for the gift but gently pushed it back, saying she couldn't accept. Helena protested, saying it was a gift and a way for her to show her gratitude and appreciation and then Kit said there was no reason Helena had to feel grateful or appreciative, it's what friends did for one another. And then Kit said Helena should drop in at the Planet sometime and they could play the record together and that could be enough. It was such a gentle offer of friendship and Helena wanted to accept, but she still found herself intimidated somehow by Kit for reasons Helena wasn't certain of herself. Certainly, there was some admiration involved--Helena listened to Kit Porter records both in high school and college and the only reason why she stopped was because she found out about Kit and Bette's relationship and after that, it just felt a little strange. And Helena has seen the way Kit treats Bette and the others and Kit is markedly gentler with her than Kit is with her own sister, so Helena really should not find Kit so intimidating, but she did, even if she wanted to be friends with the older woman. It was a strange predicament and so Helena found herself quietly standing behind Alice as the blonde and Kit exchanged a hug and carried on a conversation.

Kit playfully slapped Alice's arm. "Baby Girl, what did you do to her?" Kit asked gesturing to Helena. Kit grinned teasingly at Helena. "Look at you, standing there, looking sorry and sorrowful." Kit grinned at Alice.

Alice giggled and turned to grab Helena by the hand and pulled the British woman close. "Yeah, bring your sorrowful butt over here," Alice said, lightly patting Helena on the butt to illustrate her point.

Helena blushed but laughed good-naturedly. "Hello, Kit," she said quietly.

Kit grinned and lightly wound a lock of Helena's hair around her index finger. "I like the hair," she said with a smile. "You look good."

Helena touched her hair self-consciously, thinking back to her mother's earlier comment about her hair. Granted her mother said it "suited" her, but her first comment had been to ask if Alice preferred Helena's hair straightened--it sounded like such a dig, and that was what stayed with Helena. "I like to straighten it every few weeks," she said softly. "It's a nice change."

"It looks good," Kit said encouragingly. "You'd never think with that stick straight hair that your hair is actually as curly as mine," Kit said with a laugh.

Alice and Helena laughed with her.

"So what can I get you two?" Kit asked.

"Just a couple of coffees," Alice said.

"Anything else? You two want some pie?"

Helena shook her head. "No," she said softly. "Thank-you, we had dessert."

Kit grinned at them. "It wouldn't kill you two to eat more," she said with a grin. She held up the bag of eight treasure pudding Helena and Alice brought back. "I'm going to put this in the kitchen, thanks guys. I'll be back with your coffees."

A few minutes later, Kit walked out and then poured two cups of coffee into to-go cups and passed them to Helena and Alice.

"Are you two sure you don't want some pie?" Kit pressed.

Alice giggled. "No, really. Thanks."

Helena patted her stomach. "I'm fairly certain if I ate anything else, my stomach with explode," she said, using her hands to illustrate the point. She looked at Kit, "perhaps another time?"

Kit grinned. "Count on it."

Alice and Helena waved goodbye and walked out of the Planet together.

"She is very kind," Helena said quietly.

"Yep, she's 'good people,'" Alice said with a smile, happy that Kit and Helena were connecting. People may have been slow to accept she and Helena as a couple, but they were coming along and she was grateful for it.

Alice always felt the reason she was blessed with such great friends was because she wasn't blessed with an especially close or understanding family. Oh, she knew her parents loved her, even if her mother made her feel like crap and took advantage of her, and she hadn't spoken to her father in years, had no idea where he was, really. And she knew her two older siblings loved her, adored her, really, even if they didn't really show it. But there had been moments, even if they were very few, where she really felt her family's love for her. So she knew they loved her, but sometimes, their affection was so rare, and they criticized her and made fun of her, made light of her life and were just so dismissive of her, that it was hard to remember they loved her. Oh, they weren't mean-spirited, but it was just the way they were, and she was who she was, and even though she'd grown up that way, she'd just never been able to be strong enough to just accept it. She just never found a way to make it not hurt.

So she didn't have the greatest relationship with her family, although she supposed most of the world could say that. But she did have great friends.

She had Dana who was able to rise above her own hurt and feelings of rejection to really be supportive of her, and anytime Dana was around Helena, Dana was always good to Helena. It couldn't be easy, and Alice wasn't sure if she could be as gracious if the positions were reversed. And Shane was so mellow and non-judgmental, that Helena and Shane were simply at ease with one another. The same could be said of Jenny, who was sweet and accepting of everyone and Carmen who Alice genuinely did consider a friend now. Maybe it was easier for Carmen to accept Helena than it was for everyone else because Carmen just didn't have access to all the history with Bette and Tina and their relationship and Helena's lamentable decision to get involved in that. Really, it wasn't Helena's fault she found Tina attractive and that Tina had been technically available because Bette decided Candace Jewell was worth risking a seven-year marriage and abusing Tina's trust. Helena had no idea what she was getting involved in either, and she unfairly took flak for pursuing Tina who explicitly stated she was single. But it was such a messy situation and for some reason, Bette and Tina had some hallowed position in their social circle. Alice herself had admired their relationship and placed it on a pedestal, although that was no longer true because she knew now she would never really want their relationship.

It was messy and had more than its fair share or problems. Part of it was just who they were as people, and though Alice had always been wary of Bette after the asshole way Bette treated her while they were dating, Alice always had Tina on a pedestal. Now Alice was privy to the less desirable aspects of both her friends and she could see why they would have problems. And even after they worked so hard to get back together, they were still having the same problems, like holding things back and not communicating with one another

With all that between Bette and Tina, it was only natural that Helena would get metaphorically screwed for getting mixed up in a situation any person who had all the details would want to stay far away from. But Helena didn't have all the details, and she got involved in Bette and Tina's life and granted without Helena's involvement in the life of Bette and Tina, it was highly unlikely Helena would have become involved in Alice's life, but Helena becoming mixed up in the drama of Bette and Tina just made it that much more difficult for the others to accept Helena with Alice. Still, they were beginning to do it, and she was glad.

Even Bette and Tina who had the most reason to want to stay away from Helena were grudgingly accepting. Invitations to Alice were inherently understood to include Helena, to the point where the week before Tina left a message on Alice's voicemail and asked if "you and Helena wanted to come to dinner." They may accept her grudgingly--things were always tense between Bette and Helena, and likely would always have a bit of tension, but it was getting better and Alice was relieved and thankful.

Whatever their faults may be, Alice really did believe she was blessed to have such great friends.

Helena didn't have the greatest family life, either, at least, not the one she was born into. And though she was blessed with two wonderful children, who made her feel fulfilled and happy, she wasn't blessed with great friends to form a surrogate family the way Alice was. Alice hoped that eventually, Helena could call Alice's friends her own so that Helena, too, could be blessed with great friends. Thinking back to the way Kit treated Helena, Alice thought it could happen.

---------------------------------------------

The first thing Helena did when she came home after greeting Alice and checking in on her sleeping children was to go upstairs with the intent to shower. From her girlfriend's tired posture and the way Helena dragged her feet, Alice could tell the first thing Helena would do is to flop face first onto the bed as she tended to do when she was especially tired. It was Thursday, which meant Helena worked late because of a staff meeting with direct service providers, but she was coming home especially late that night--well after the children's bedtime.

Alice dried the last dish and waited. Moments later, there was a high-pitched shriek and a thump followed by raucous laughter. The blonde heard Helena shout her name and burst into laughter before she ran up the stairs to the bedroom and saw Helena sitting on the bed, covered in plastic toy spiders and alternately shrieking in disgust and laughing. Helena turned to look at them.

"How on earth did you manage this?" she asked, giggling.

Alice smirked. "I took a half day off from work just so I could do it," she said, laughing with a pleased smile.

Helena shook her head and laughed as she tried to pull the spiders out of her hair. She moved to sit back on the bed to do so, but then paused and looked at Alice suspiciously.

Alice rolled her eyes. "It's safe, but hold on," she said.

She pulled the sheets off and pointed to a thin foam pad that expanded the entire bed.

Helena raised an eyebrow and looked closely at it and saw that a thin line of twine was attached to it near the headboard and ran up the wall which was attached to a tiny hook that Alice had apparently set into the ceiling.

"Don't worry," Alice assured "It's attached with a suction, you just have to pull it off."

Helena shook her head. "You capitalized on the fact I would return home late tonight," she accused. If she had not been so tired and had not returned home so late, there was no way she would have never noticed the line of white twine running up the wall and to the ceiling, or the medium-sized basket Alice had set up to be triggered by Helena's weight on the bed to pull the basket down and unleash the colony of plastic spiders. She did think the bed felt a little strange, due the foam pad, but it had happened so quickly that she couldn't scramble off the bed in time to inspect.

"Yes," Alice acknowledged with a grin. "Yes, I did." She giggled and sat down next to Helena and began to help Helena pull the plastic spiders out of her hair, most of which had been caught in her curly hair.

She pulled out a spider and looked at it. "This is Mortimer," she said, holding it up to Helena's face. "Do you want to give him a goodbye kiss?"

Helena cringed slightly, though she knew it was a toy. She had an intense fear of spiders. "Get that way from me!"

Alice laughed and tossed him into the trash can.

"Where on earth did you find all these toy spiders?"

Alice laughed. "I had a bunch left over from that Halloween bag I gave to the kids a few months ago, remember?"

Helena smiled at the memory. "Yes," she said softly, "I do."

"Then I bought a bunch more this week," Alice said with a laugh. "And it wasn't easy, believe me!"

Helena laughed, too. Although she knew she should be cross with Alice, she did think the prank was a little funny, even if Alice did evilly capitalize on both her intense fear of spiders and the fact that Alice knew she would be working later than usual that night. Helena thought back to that memory of Halloween night and how much Alice's gesture to her children had touched her. Even back then, when Alice was still heart-broken over breaking up with Dana and going on dates with multiple people, Helena had had her heart set on Alice. "I love you, darling," Helena said with a soft sigh,

Alice looked at Helena suspiciously, "You're going to get me back for this, aren't you?"

"Of course," Helena said pleasantly. "But I do truly love you, darling." Helena paused. "I loved you even then."

Alice was quiet for a moment before she spoke. "Halloween?"

"Yes."

Alice thought back several months and thought of the way she was so happy to take the children trick-or-treating with Helena and to spend alone time with Helena both at the West Hollywood Parade/Carnival and then afterward at Helena's house, and she knew that though she hadn't known it at the time, she'd been falling for Helena, too. Alice wrapped her arms around Helena's waist and pressed her face against Helena's back. "I loved you back then, too," Alice said quietly. "I was just going through my own…thing at the time," she said with a soft sigh. She wished now she could have moved quicker, not that she regretted anything when it came to Helena, just that she wished she could have realized and understood her feelings more quickly.

"Did you?" Helena asked softly.

"Yeah," Alice said.

Helena chuckled and turned around to lightly swat at Alice's arm. "I'm still going to get you back for this, darling."

Alice giggled. "Damn," she said. She pulled out another toy spider entangled in Helena's hair. "Hey, Charlie," Alice greeted, giving the toy a tiny wiggle. "See ya," she said, hurling him into the trash can.

Helena, too, resumed pulling toy spiders out of her hair.

"Later, Humphrey," Alice said, throwing another spider into the trash.

"Darling, you didn't name each of these spiders, did you?"

"Plastic spiders are people, too," Alice said with a laugh. "We're already throwing them away, do you want to dehumanize them even more by taking away their names?"

Helena laughed and shook her head and chose not to respond as she pulled out more plastic spiders and threw them into the trash can without naming them.

Alice gathered several plastic spiders into her hand. "Bye Moe, Curly, Barney, Stewie, Evangeline, Dexter and Robspierre," she said, hurling them en masse toward the trash can, although only half hit the actual target.

"Darling!" Helena exclaimed, torn between annoyance and adoration at Alice's naming of the toy spiders, her current tormentors. "How can you possibly differentiate between them?"

Alice chuckled and held one up. "This is Rasputin, his leg is slightly bent. Every toy spider is different, Helena. Like snowflakes. And people. Wanna say bye to Rasputin?" Alice held it up close to Helena's cheek,

"Get it away! Get it away!" Helena cried.

"It's fake."

"Its name is Rasputin, surely you had a reason for calling him that."

Alice paused. "So you admit there is logic in naming my toy spider friends!" she exclaimed, her voice squeaking slightly as she waved Rasputin in Helena's face.

Helena cringed and squirmed. "An Alice kind of logic, yes."

"Alice logic is just as sound as Helena logic."

"I would never name toy spiders."

"I said Alice logic is just as sound as Helena logic, not exactly the same."

"Get it away!"

Alice chuckled and finally relented and hurled Rasputin with the one slightly bent leg into the trashcan. She refocused her attention on Helena and giggled. "Did you ever read Angela Carter?" she asked, as she pulled out more spiders and threw them into the trash can, mercifully pausing in her naming game.

"In the Company of Wolves?" Helena asked.

"Yeah."

"Yes," Helena said slowly, feeling a little suspicious.

"You know that part at the end, where she writes about Little Red Riding Hood and how the wolf will put his head in her lap and she'll pick lice from his pelt?"

Helena's shoulders began to shake from laughter. She knew exactly what was coming. "Yes."

"This is sort of reminding me of that," Alice said, giggling and leaping off the bed as Helena predictably turned to swat at Alice's arm.

Helena launched herself toward Alice, grabbing Alice into a hug and she blew a raspberry against Alice's neck.

Alice squealed and slapped at Helena's arm. "Well, it did!" Alice exclaimed. "I can't help it if I'm a worldly, well-read woman of the world."

Helena laughed heartily. "I suppose you can't," she said. "But even the most worldly, well-read woman of the world can not compete against a woman who is masterful and butch," Helena said, spinning around and trying to grab Alice into a fireman's carry

Alice chuckled. "Yeah? Where is this masterful and butch woman? Because it isn't you," Alice teased. "And according to you, it isn't me, either."

Alice felt herself being picked up by Helena into the fireman's carry but then realized Helena wasn't doing it properly and braced herself for the inevitable when in just two seconds she went crashing to the floor on top of Helena.

There was a shocked silence and then raucous laughter once again filled the room.

"Oh my God," Alice wheezed, scrambling off Helena. "Are you okay?" she asked, running her hands along Helena's body to check for injury, though Helena was still laughing.

"No, I'm horribly disfigured now," Helena managed to deadpan before breaking off into a fit of giggles.

Alice laughed again. "I could have carried you," Alice said smugly.

"Ha!" Helena chortled. "I assure you, darling, if I could not carry you, you can not carry me."

Alice scowled. "Get up!" she said, slapping at Helena's thigh.

Helena knew a challenge when she heard one and she immediately stood to her feet.

Alice turned and tried to pull Helena into the fireman's carry but realized it was much more difficult than she thought to get the proper leverage and they once again fell to the ground, this time with Helena on top of Alice. And once again, the bedroom was filled with raucous laughter as Helena scrambled off, saying "I'm sorry, darling, are you all right?" in one breath and "I told you so," in the next.

Alice swatted at Helena's stomach and laughed.

The two women sat on the floor, laughing and trying to catch their breaths for the next five minutes before the laughter finally died down and they resumes trying to pull the toy plastic spiders from Helena's hair.

"Bye Larry," Alice said, pulling out a spider. "Nice knowing you. Seymour, you were my favorite."

"Stop naming them!" Helena said, becoming a little snippy though she continued to laugh. She had to admit, the prank was a good one since it managed to cover her hair in toy plastic spiders. "I should have straightened my hair this morning," Helena huffed, thinking if it had been straight like it had been several days before, it would not nearly be as bad now.

Alice was calm, though she bit back her laughter. "I keep telling you, Helena. Plastic spiders are people too." She held up another spider. "You try telling Ziggy Stardust here that his name isn't Ziggy Stardust."

Helena looked disapproving. "You named one of these loathsome things after one of my favorite records?"

Alice gasped dramatically. "Don't listen to her, guys! Just because I used you to play a prank on her and now I'm throwing you away doesn't mean you're loathsome. You're awesome little guys." Alice lightly slapped Helena's back. "Don't say that in front of the boys!" She smiled innocently. "I named him that just for you," she said sweetly. "As a tribute to our love. And the name really fits this little guy. He plays guitar, you see," Alice explained matter-of-factly.

"With the other spiders from Mars, I suppose," said Helena, going along with the song lyrics game.

"And I'm attached to these little guys. I've been playing with them for weeks now in preparation for my grand joke on you. In fact, I'm thinking of holding a memorial for them." She picked out another spider. "Alas, poor Yorick," Alice said with mock mournfulness. "I knew him well," she declared, as she plunked Yorick into the trashcan.

Helena practically howled with laughter and the two women once again broke into a fit of giggles. Once they caught their breaths, Alice hugged Helena close from behind and nuzzled Helena's neck. "I got you good, Pretty."

"Yes," Helena acknowledged. "You did."

The two finally lapsed into companionable silence as they pulled out the last of the toy spiders from Helena's hair.

"You hungry?" Alice asked, rubbing lazy circles on Helena's stomach. "Or did you get dinner already?"

"I haven't eaten yet," Helena admitted.

"I'll run down to the kitchen and get you something," Alice said earnestly, rising to her feet. "I'll be back."

Alice ran down to the kitchen and got the plate of food from dinner she put into the oven to keep warm for Helena and put it on a tray and grabbed two glasses and a bottle of wine and walked up the stairs. She walked back into the bedroom and saw that Helena was nowhere in sight.

"Helena?" she called out, puzzled. She walked into the bedroom and placed the tray on the dresser and glanced around. She noticed the balcony door was slightly ajar and stepped forward, expecting to see Helena standing on the balcony, but the dark-haired woman wasn't there.

She checked the bathroom, but Helena was not there either.

"Helena?" Alice asked, concerned.

When there was no response, Alice began looking around the room.

"Helena?"

Moments later, Helena leaped out of the closet, screaming and waving her arms around.

Alice stared at her blankly. "Did you see a spider in the closet?" she asked calmly, knowing full well that hiding in the closet and leaping out, screaming, was Helena's way of "getting back" at her. It was a little lame and Alice found it endearing.

Helena scowled and pouted. "Are you saying I'm not frightful?"

Alice looked amused. "I'm not sure what you find scary, Helena," Alice said with a grin. "But where I'm from five-foot-eight, skinny British chicks wearing Chanel don't really invoke fear."

Helena laughed. "That was just the precursor to my revenge," she insisted, though at the moment she had no idea what her revenge would be.

Alice grinned. "I'm so scared," she said sarcastically, with an impish grin.

"You ought to be," Helena huffed. "I am very strong and intimidating," Helena said, crossing her arms, her lower lip jutting out.

Alice chuckled. "Oh, I 'm so scared," Alice said softly, stepping closer to Helena.

"You ought to be," Helena repeated quietly, uncrossing her arms as she gazed into Alice's eyes.

"I am, I'm so scared," Alice said, moving even closer to Helena and pulled Helena close to her by gently grabbing onto Helena's butt. "You should protect me," Alice said softly.

Helena's arms went immediately around Alice's waist, and she smiled down at Alice.

"My hero," Alice breathed. "I'm going to kiss you," Alice said softly. "Because that's what people should do for people who rescue them from a fate of skinny, wrathful British chicks."

Helena's shoulders started to shake as she giggled before Alice grabbed the sides of the British woman's face and pulled her head down for a kiss.

Alice's lips pressed against Helena's and Alice ran her tongue across Helena's lower lip. Helena's lips parted and she gently began sucking on Alice's tongue when the blonde deepened the kiss. Alice moaned, the sound coming deep from the back of her throat.

As they kissed, Alice began to gently guide them toward the bed.

Pushing Helena roughly onto the bed on her back, Alice straddled Helena's hips and began unbuttoning Helena's blouse. "I'm happy you're home," Alice said softly, before leaning forward to place a trail of kisses down Helena's torso. She unbuttoned and unzipped Helena's pants and pulled them down quickly and dropped them to the side of the bed.

Helena's head tilted back and she released a low moan as Alice unclasped her bra and cupped one of her breasts before she began licking around the nipple before pulling it into her mouth and sucking on it. Helena's hands clenched into Alice's hair and her hands trailed across Alice's back, making smooth circles before trailing down and giving Alice's ass a firm squeeze. Alice jumped slightly and Helena took that moment to flip their positions, throwing off her bra all the way in the process.

Alice lay on her back, slightly startled at the move, as she felt Helena unzip her pants and yank down both her pants and underwear in one movement. Alice sat up as far as she could and pulled her tank top over her head and tossed it off to the side and grabbed the back of Helena's head and pulled her close for a kiss. Helena pushed Alice back onto the bed, so that the blonde's back lay flat. Helena's hands move down to grasp Alice's breasts as the two women continued to kiss.

Helena's hands trailed down Alice's sides and Helena moved down Alice's body as well, before gripping Alice's hips. Pausing for just a moment to glance up at Alice's face to make sure it was okay, because Helena was aware she was being more aggressive than usual and she still had unpleasant memories of a time when she felt she'd been too aggressive with Alice, Helena gained confirmation that Alice was perfectly okay with everything. Lowering her head, Helena began a soft trail of kisses that started from Alice's stomach and moved down until Helena reached Alice's pussy. Alice moaned quietly as Helena's tongue slipped into the folds of her pussy, her moans becoming louder and her hips jerking off the bed as Helena increased the pressure of her tongue and began nipping and sucking.

One of Alice's hands slid down Helena's back, her nails scratching a path and the other threaded through Helena's hair, her fingernails scraping Helena's scalp and trying to push Helena's head forward in an attempt to get some release. Helena squeezed the inside of Alice's thighs with her hands before she began sucking on Alice's clit.

Alice gasped and she began alternately panting and moaning before she finally came, crying Helena's name. Breathing hard, she pulled Helena up to her and held her tightly, kissing all over Helena's face, her neck. "I love you," Alice whispered. "I love you so much." Alice caressed Helena's face gently, and peered into blue eyes, so open and so trusting.

Sex was always different when you were with someone you loved. They could hurt you so terribly, maybe to the point where you thought you were beyond repair. It was an odd thought to be having at the moment, and Alice could fully acknowledge this. But she thought it anyway. She wondered if that was what happened with Helena. She knew things about Helena and Winnie's sexual history, that there were times when Winnie hurt Helena and didn't care or Helena wouldn't say anything because she thought that was just the way it had to be. And though Helena tried not to let it affect her relationship with Alice, it did.

Helena always tried to be so gentle with Alice, let her take the lead and she berated herself for showing any kind of aggression.

Helena was uncomfortable with sexual aggression, she hated herself when she displayed it, even when it was within normal boundaries and not even remotely deviant or frightening, Helena despised herself for showing it. And Alice wasn't always certain Helena was comfortable when Alice directed it toward Helena, and so sometimes, their lovemaking could be hesitant or tentative because Alice was determined to show Helena that not only was she different from Winnie, but Helena could trust her, and she trusted Helena, and to do that, Alice felt Helena had to determine the pace of their relationship--and she was comfortable with that.

Alice could admit that it was difficult sometimes. Helena was so good at seeming confident and carefree, Alice could forget how vulnerable Helena truly was, how difficult it was for Helena to give her trust and how easy it was for Helena to lose faith in a person. Three weeks ago, Alice had been almost certain she and Helena were not really on the same page, that Helena couldn't trust her, that no matter how hard she tried, Helena would always keep parts of herself separate.

But something changed in those three weeks, and Alice felt secure in her relationship with Helena, fully secure, for the first time.

"Your turn," Alice said in a rough whisper, "come here," she said, pulling Helena's head close to her pressing her lips against Helena's in a hard kiss, her hand roaming over Helena's body. She was going to show Helena, slowly, how much she truly did love her.

---------------------------

"You can't use that ball!" Alice exclaimed.

Helena had her arms crossed defiantly in front of her, pouting petulantly. "I most certainly can!"

Alice grabbed Helena's hand and gasped dramatically. "Look at this! You broke a nail! Your fingers are too long and big for a children's bowling ball, Helena!"

"But the other ones are too heavy," Helena protested.

"That's because they're adult-sized and they aren't too heavy. You can't use a children's ball! It's not fair, Helena. Then everyone will want to use a children's ball, and soon the children will have no bowling balls to use and all the adults will have arthritis and crippling diseases and it will be all your fault just because you don't mind being unfair."

Helena huffed. "It is fair, it negates our discrepancies. You're an experienced bowling person, darling--"

"Bowler," Alice corrected. "And I'm not experienced, I've just done it more than zero times. And even when it was my first time--" Alice trailed off. "Okay, I used a kid's ball then, but that's because I was seven. You're almost thirty!"

"You aren't at all concerned bout my hands which are becoming potentially arthritic from using this ball, you're just upset I'm doing better than you now that I have this miracle of bowling ball design," Helena shot back, holding up the bright orange bowling ball for emphasis.

"Ha!" Alice exclaimed, pointing a finger at Helena. "See? Stop using that ball! Use a normal one! You're giving yourself arthritis and then how will you play in that band we're going to form with the kids like the Partridge family when we both retire? I plan on being a lead singer and I will not have my lady friend hanging around backstage where roadies can ogle her behind my back!"

Helena scowled. "Who said I had arthritis? I merely said they were potentially becoming arthritic. And why do you get to be the lead singer? Perhaps Jun Ying may want to take that position," Helena said with a grin, glancing over at her son and daughter who were bowling in a lane next to them. Alice was the object of worship in the Peabody home and Jun Ying adored Alice who could play multiple instruments and used to play in a band. Helena knew her children's adoration of Alice was just one of the many reasons why she loved the blonde as much as she did. The fact Alice adored the children as much as they adored her was just another reason why Helena loved Alice even more. Alice could be depended on to care for and play with the children at any moment and she treated them as though they were her own children and the blonde never resented that Helena's attention would always be divided between Alice and the children. Helena was deeply grateful for that.

"Because it's the band that's in my imagination," Alice said. "So I get to be the lead singer. Don't make me make you the drummer, or else I'll start thinking about Spinal Tap and I don't want to do that to you. I want you around when we get our big break."

The others sat in their seats and amusedly watched Alice and Helena playfully bicker because it was obvious how much the two women enjoyed it, and when they were honest with themselves, they could admit they liked watching it.

Bette tapped Tina on the shoulder. "Helena's not thirty yet?" she whispered in surprise, leaning in close to Tina.

Tina shrugged. She had no idea.

Kit grinned at Bette. "You suddenly feel bad for picking on that little girl, baby sis?" she asked.

"She's not a fetus," Bette grumbled, though she did feel like a bully, suddenly thinking of how when she was in middle school, Helena Peabody was just being born. And she wasn't sure to be annoyed by how little Tina knew about Helena, because after all, Tina did date Helena for a substantial period of time or relieved because Tina's lack of knowledge of Helena's personal life definitely indicated a lack of interest which meant the relationship was not even remotely serious which helped curb her lingering insecurities.

"Alice, you leave that girl alone!" Kit called out. "She can use any old bowling ball she wants."

"Yeah, Al," Shane chimed in. "Give her a break."

"It is her first time," Carmen defended sweetly.

"Don't be such a bully, Al," Dana added. "Why can't she use that ball?"

Alice scowled at Shane, Carmen and Dana and pointed at them, and tried to bare her teeth in an attempt to look menacing and look like the evil monkey from The Family Guy. "You guys! We're on the same team! You're supposed to be on my side."

"I think Helena should be free to do whatever she wants," Jenny said. "She is an--" Jenny bobbed her head from side to side, and began humming "Free as a Bird" which had just popped into her mind and became sidetracked.

"You're supposed to finish your thoughts once you start voicing them," Annette, Jenny's friend who was visiting LA again, whispered into Jenny's ear.

Jenny turned to grin at Annette, but did not respond as she was immersed in the song which was in her head.

"That doesn't mean you should bully Helena," Lucia said, coming up behind Helena and Alice and slinging a casual arm around Helena's shoulder.

Alice mock glared at Lucia in exasperation.

"Hey, I stick up for my teammates. If Helena wants to use a kiddie ball, that's her choice," Lucia said with an easy smile.

Helena slung her arm around Lucia's waist, playing along. "Yes, darling. See? Lucia, an athlete, agrees I should absolutely be able to use this ball."

Alice huffed, but grinned at Helena. "Will you just bowl!"

Helena grinned and turned to walk toward the lane.

Alice turned to Dana. "Dana! Your girlfriend and my girlfriend are ganging up on me!"

"They're on the same team!" Dana called out, the entire group breaking into uproarious laughter.

Alice turned to watch Helena toss her ball. It rolled slowly, straight down the middle and knocked down all the pins. Helena jumped into the air and clapped.

Alice released a short whoop of joy and ran to Helena hugging her around the waist and spinning her around, laughing warmly as she did so, and then suddenly remembered that they were on opposite teams. It was the second time Helena got a strike and also the second time Alice forgot they were on opposite teams, but she didn't care.

Helena's children cheered for her and ran over to throw their arms around their mother as well.

"Yay! Mommy finally hit one!" Jun Ying said.

"Mommy hit all of them," Wilson exclaimed.

Alice pulled away and mock scowled. "If you were using a grown-up ball, that wouldn't have happened," she said, narrowing her eyes to look menacing but merely looked like she'd taken her contacts out and was now on a search to find her glasses.

Helena smiled charmingly at her. "I love you, darling."

Alice laughed and watched as Helena bowled again, this time only knocking down half the pins. Helena turned to look at Alice and gave a small shrug.

Alice chuckled and gave a thumbs up sign before she reached for a bowling ball as it was now her turn. She turned to watch Helena walk back toward the group and exchange a high-five with Lucia before sitting down next to Kit.

She never thought she would take Helena bowling, or that they would be doing that particular activity with her friends, but that's exactly what was happening. They were currently split into two teams, with Helena, Bette, Lucia, Jenny, Annette and Kit on one team and Alice, Tina, Dana, Carmen, Shane and Helena's babysitter, Lulu, on the other team. Alice's team was currently winning, but once Helena traded in her adult-bowling ball to use a children's bowling ball, she seemed to have found a streak of beginner's luck and her team was beginning to catch up.

Still, Alice found it endearing, even if she jokingly protested against it. In the beginning, Helena was clearly embarrassed by her bowling ineptitude, because it was the first time she'd done it. The evening started off with Helena and Alice arriving late because of a minor argument between Jun Ying and Wilson which ended with the both of them in tears, but both of them cheered up at the prospect of bowling. Once arriving at the bowling alley, Helena realized she'd worn open-toed sandals and would have to buy socks from one of the machines. She'd immediately run over to Alice who was at the shoe-rental area, loudly crowing about how adorable the socks in the machine were and that they had hearts on them,

Alice was terribly amused by Helena's excitement that she found a pair of socks that were not only comfortable, but "adorable" as well and immediately bought herself a pair so she could match with her girlfriend. She also bought a pair for Jun Ying and extended the offer to Wilson who scowled and replied he would not wear anything with hearts.

And she continued to be amused by how horribly bad Helena really was at bowling, and she found Helena's embarrassment endearing, the way she would glance at Alice, her expression embarrassed and guilty, her head ducked, when she once again missed hitting all the pins. The way Helena leaned over and whispered she was sorry she was so dreadfully bad at bowling and she apologized for embarrassing Alice in front of her friends with just how bad she was.

And even though Alice never wanted Helena to be feel like she was embarrassing her, hated that crestfallen look Helena got just because she missed all the pins, Alice found it endlessly endearing that her opinion mattered so much to Helena. And she loved the way Helena would glance over at the children to see if they were paying attention to her entire lack of ability, which they usually weren't.

"It's all right, baby," Alice said, pulling Helena into her lap after Helena trudged over to the seated area after her fifth time of hitting no pins. "I still love you even if you suck at bowling." Alice squeezed Helena gently and nuzzled Helena neck. "You're not embarrassing me," Alice whispered quietly, her lips tickling Helena's ear. "I think you're really cute."

Because in preparation for this day, the first time when everyone was together, Helena set up a bowling alley in the backyard, using empty bottles of Penta water a tennis ball and practiced with the children because Helena wanted to look good in front of Alice's friends and not embarrass the blonde. And Alice knew anyone who was that eager to please her truly did love her and Alice found herself loving Helena even more because of it.

Of course, that did not mean she couldn't mercilessly tease Helena about her inability to even hit one of the pins. It was just her competitive streak. So it was she who jokingly suggested that Helena use one of the child-size bowling balls which Helena gamely did.

The result of which was Helena's first strike.

There was an immediate swell of shocked gasps and yells.

Bette, who was Helena's teammate and hated to be on the losing team, which was losing quite badly thanks to the remarkable inability of any woman on the team to hit more than a few pins at a time (even Lucia, the athlete, turned out to be horribly bad at bowling) jumped to her feet, shouting in jubilation. In the heat of the moment, Helena and Bette exchanged hearty high-fives, before Helena was grabbed around the waist, spun around and waltzed around the seated area by Alice as the children clapped and cheered.

"Yay, Mommy and Alice are dancing again," Jun Ying said, grinning at them and waving.

"They're always dancing," Wilson whispered to Bette, whom Wilson adored because she helped him with art. "Alice makes Mommy fall a lot."

Bette glanced at Helena and Alice who were just a mass of entangled limbs and grinned at Wilson, ruffling his hair. "I can picture that," she said thinking of how strange it was that Wilson, who was definitely showing artistic promise had someone like Helena, who while not a complete philistine didn't have an appreciation for the arts, for a mother. She still didn't like Helena whatsoever and suspected that even if Alice stayed with Helena for the rest of their lives, she would still only barely manage to tolerate Helena. But Helena was a part of their lives now, and Bette didn't want to let artistic promise slip away, she just thought it was wasteful. And though Helena did encourage Wilson and was sending him to an art teacher Bette recommended, Bette still felt the need to foster Wilson's ability the way Alice fostered Jun Ying's musical ability.

The bowling night progressed and although Alice's team won that particularly set, the next set was much closer, although the blonde's team was still slightly ahead of Helena's team.

Alice's first try knocked down all the pins save one and her second try knocked down the remaining pin. Alice pumped her fists victoriously in the area.

Helena clapped loudly. "Good for you, darling!" she shouted enthusiastically, jumping to her feet and jumping up and down just as she did at her children's soccer games.

Alice grinned at her.

Kit lightly nudged Helena in the ribs with her elbow. "You remember you're on our team and she's on the other one, right?" she teased.

Helena blushed. She couldn't help herself. She was proud of Alice, and it was just an instinctual reaction.

Alice heard Kit and she smirked at she walked to Helena and took a seat in Helena's lap. She slung her arm around Helena's neck and kissed Helena's cheek. "Thanks for cheering for me, baby," she whispered quietly. Then she grinned. "Hey, Helena can't help it if I'm so great she can't resist cheering for the enemy," she said with a perky grin. She giggled. "I'm a bowler!" she said, her voice squeaking slightly, throwing her hands up into the air, nearly falling out of Helena's lap and almost knocking Helena out of her chair. Helena's arm instantly wrapped tighter around Alice's waist to steady her.

Everyone groaned at Alice's mock arrogance.

"Helena?" Bette called out.

Helena turned to look at Bette warily. "Yes?"

They were still not on good terms, there had been other nights when she and Alice had gone out with Bette and Tina and a great deal of mutual backbiting had occurred. There was still an intense mutual enmity between them, and Bette Porter never bothered to hide her animosity. But this particular night had been for once, relatively free of any sort of negative interaction with Bette and so Helena hoped to keep it that way.

"What's that thing growing out of your lap?" Bette asked, her eyes feigning horror. "It's this annoying blonde thing and it's completely taking over." Bette squinted, pretending to look closer. "Oh, never mind. That's just Alice."

The others howled with laughter as Alice leaped to her feet and stared at Bette with her hands on her hips. Bette looked back at Alice innocently.

"What?"

Helena chuckled, torn between being genuinely amused and feeling the need to defend the woman she loved. Helena rose to her feet and stood behind Alice, wrapping her arms around Alice's waist and resting her chin on Alice's shoulder. "I like my women annoying and blonde and completely taking over," Helena said, with an impish grin.

"Aww," Shane called out jokingly, laughing when Alice shot her a playfully dirty look. Shane put her arm around Carmen and drew her girlfriend as she laughed at Alice's expense.

Alice stuck her tongue out at Bette. "My woman likes her women blonde, irritating and domineering, so there" she said huffily, though she grinned at Bette to show there were no hard feelings and that she were merely joking. Things had been tense between her and Bette, but as long as Bette was polite to Helena, Alice was satisfied.

Everyone laughed and Helena and Alice took their seats next to Jenny who was talking to her friend Annette as Dana took her turn with Lucia playfully instigating an argument by mocking Dana's posture and bad bowling form.

Alice smiled as she watched Dana turn and laugh as she waved her finger at Lucia, telling her trainer to shut up, she was trying to bowl. Although Lucia was oddly terrible at bowling, Dana was not much better and the two had been engaged in a playful competition the entire evening. Alice recognized it for what it was--semi-courtship, and though she was happy with Helena, she could not quite suppress that tiny note of jealousy at seeing Dana interested in someone else. Alice doubted Dana was even aware of it yet, but Alice could see that eventually, it would likely turn into something more. Alice was admittedly a little jealous, but she supposed a part of her would always love Dana and because Dana was the first person she'd loved so deeply, there would always be a vague sense of territoriality and protectiveness. Though she was a little jealous, more than anything else, Alice was relieved that Dana was almost ready to move on, and happy that Dana had a specific person she was interested in. Dana and Lucia were dancing around the issue for now, but the interest was clearly mutual and as long as Lucia treated Dana well, Alice was happy.

Still, she could not resist mocking the pair a bit. "It's the athletic dyke mating dance. Over bowling," Alice commented, leaning back to ease into Helena. She turned to grin at Jenny and Annette who both grinned back at her.

Helena lightly whapped at Alice shoulder. "Darling," she admonished gently.

Annette laughed and she slapped at Jenny's knee. "That reminds me of the time you and Sandra Bui got too drunk on cheap ass Budweiser at that bowling alley near campus and you guys got naked and ran around screaming out of there to my car."

Jenny looked thoughtful. "I wasn't naked, I was wearing this," she said, pulling on her cape to emphasize her point.

Helena and Alice exchanged a look, Helena clearly silently asking Alice why Jenny would wear a cape to go bowling with Alice returning the look with one of her own, clearly communicating that while she had no idea why Jenny was wearing a cape, Jenny was Jenny. Though Jenny was a little odd, a little intense and occasionally became lost in her own world, there was still something undeniably sweet and sincere about her that made Alice just like Jenny no matter what and that made Helena feel protective of her. Jenny baffled them both, but they each enjoyed her company.

Annette smiled sweetly at her friend, looking at Jenny with genuine affection and amusement. "When you ran," Annette began in conspiratorial tones, lightly bumping Jenny's knee with her own, "your cape flew up so we could still see your ass."

Jenny smiled dreamily. "But then Tim ran after me and gave me his coat." Jenny's eyes became teary as she thought of her former love. "He was really patient with me back then," Jenny said quietly.

Annette looked at Jenny and smiled wryly. "It was forty degrees outside and he didn't want everyone seeing his girlfriend's goodies." Annette made a face. "Can we please not talk about him? I can still hear the two of you getting it on in my head. I mean, you were only, like, ten feet away." She scowled slightly. "And the way he left was really shitty," she commented, looking disgusted.

Jenny shrugged. "He was…is a very good man," she said with a sigh.

"Whatever," Annette said dismissively. "I still think we should find him and put cement in his tires or something."

Jenny laughed. "Annette."

Annette shrugged innocently. "What? Maybe I'm a suit now, but I still have my mean streak."

"You are pretty evil," Jenny agreed. "Like the monkeys."

Alice and Helena who had been vaguely listening to the conversation looked at each other blankly, but Annette seemed unfazed by the mention of the evil monkeys.

"It's likely a private joke between them," Helena murmured into Alice's ear, thinking of how very confusing a conversation must be with Jenny sometimes if it weren't an inside joke.

Alice grinned and raised Helena's hand and kissed the inside of the British woman's wrist. "Yeah," she said, nestling into Helena's lap.

"What kind of monkey do you think is the most evil?" Annette asked, indulging her friend, glancing at Alice and Helena and winking at them.

Jenny looked contemplative. "I don't think any species of monkey is more evil than another, you know?" Jenny asked, linking her fingers and tucking them under her chin as she turned her head to stare at a group of teenagers in the next lane. "I mean, they're so close to humans, I think it's more on an individual basis, like it is with people." Jenny grinned at Annette. "Remember that class on evolution I had to take junior year?"

Annette rolled her eyes. "Yes, yes I do." Annette made a face. "You're going to tell the ape story again, aren't you?" she asked with a sigh. She'd forgotten all about the ape story.

"I don't know if it was an ape," Jenny said absently. Jenny looked at Helena and Alice. "There was this ape…or maybe it was a chimp or a gorilla or an orangutan--"

"Some breed of overgrown monkey, they get it," Annette interrupted, putting her arm around Jenny.

"So with this particular breed, a teenage male leaves his group and tries to go off and find a new mate and join a new group, but it can be really vicious," Jenny explained. "And so there was this ape or chimp or--"

"Gorilla or orangutan," Annette interrupted playfully.

"Right," Jenny said, "and it was mauled by the new clique he was trying to join. He was really close to death and he crawled and died next to this river, and across the river, was his old family and scientists thought he was trying to go home and die next to his mother." Jenny's eyes became misty. "See? They're like fucking humans."

"Yes, yes, they are, Jen," Annette said soothingly, remembering the night Jenny walked into her room carrying the textbook. Jenny plopped onto the bed next to her and then read from the textbook, remarking on the humanness of it and how very sad it all was. Jenny's capacity for empathy went deep and it was for this reason that Annette wished they lived closer together. "So, what does this have to do with evil monkeys?"

Jenny looked at Annette blankly. "It doesn't. I'm just saying."

Helena, Alice and Annette chuckled.

"I wish I hadn't read that," Jenny remarked, looking a bit sad. "It's always stayed with me and it's sad," Jenny sighed. "And I slept with Professor Aronson anyway and he gave me an A, so I really didn't have to read that chapter."

Helena looked horrified. "I hope this professor was barred from teaching," she said, appalled at the thought of a professor taking advantage of a young woman, especially one who was as sweet as Jenny.

Annette and Jenny looked at Helena, a little amused.

"It's okay, Helena," Jenny said. "Really. It was mutual."

"But--"

Alice patted Helena's knee. "Let it go, baby," she said, grinning at Helena. She loved the way Helena became outraged on behalf of other people and thought it was a sore spot for her that Winnie had been Helena's teaching assistant in college because she felt Helena had been taken advantage of, she did not think it was quite the same thing for Jenny and her professor. It was clear that although it was "wrong," it wasn't the sort of thing Jenny really cared about.

"This girl may look all young and innocent," Annette said, pulling Jenny closer to her. "But she's actually kind of a tramp." She grinned at Jenny. "Remember all those professors in college?"

Jenny grinned. "Some of them," she answered honestly.

"Jenny," Carmen called, "your turn."

Annette, Alice and Helena watched as Jenny leaped to her feet and skipped to the lane, picking up a ball at random and tossing it. It bounced several times, and everyone with the exception of Jenny, winced at the sound.

"That's my girl," Annette said proudly, as she watched the ball travel slowly down the lane before ending up in the gutter and hitting no pins. Jenny had been bowling that way all night.

Unfazed, Jenny spun around happily and grabbed another ball at random.

Annette leaned in close to Alice and Helena as Jenny prepared to try again.

"Take good care of her for me," Annette whispered. "I live too far away to do it." Annette turned at the sound of a bowling ball making a hard landing on the ground and watched it once again bounce several times before landing into the gutter and making a slow journey toward the pins (but hitting none). Annette smiled affectionately as she watched Jenny spin around several times, arms in the air before turning back to them. "She's the best friend I've got."

Alice and Helena smiled at one another and then at Annette. "We will," they said together.

Annette smiled at them and then grinned when Jenny returned to her seat as it was Lucia's turn to bowl. They briefly turned to watch Lucia ready herself as Dana heckled her and then turned back to one another.

Alice watched Dana with an affectionate smile. Dana was now standing up and mocking Lucia's bowling form with exaggeratedly clumsy movements. Lucia had her arms crossed in front of her and was watching Dana with an patiently amused expression.

"Are you done?" Lucia asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Almost," Dana said, squatting and then pretending to hurl the invisible object in her hand like a discus.

"Hm," Lucia said simply, turning around and rolling her ball.

Alice gazed at Dana fondly. When Dana was comfortable enough with someone, this was how she acted--a little goofy, and unselfconscious, unafraid to be herself. She loved it when Dana was like this, because it meant Dana was happy and comfortable with who she was.

For a while after Alice had chosen Helena as the woman she would spend the remainder of her life with, things with Dana became awkward and uncomfortable, conversation stilted. But soon it returned to the way it was, and Alice was so very glad for that.

And she was so very glad that Dana finally had another person she could be that way around, because more than anything, Alice wanted the people she loved to be happy. And she herself could not remember a time when she felt so happy. After all, nearly all the people she cared most about were just a few feet away from her, they were all more or less happy and getting along. She was sitting in the lap of the woman she loved, who loved her back. The kids were being cosseted and fussed over by everyone which made Alice happy that no one seemed annoyed with the presence of the young children and that there was a lack of awkwardness in the way they treated Jun Ying and Wilson. Helena was clearly pleased with it, and when Helena was happy…

Alice was happy.

-----------------------------

Alice Pieszecki never planned for a life of domestic bliss, at least, not like this. Not with a girl, and two kids who were begging for a dog. Helena still wasn't sure if they were old enough for the responsibility, but she definitely wanted to get them a dog. This wasn't the life Alice thought would be for her, where she was hanging out with her girlfriend on a Sunday afternoon watching an Alfred Hitchcock DVD while her girlfriend's two children were playing next door. But, well, this is what she had, and she was glad.

Helena had never seen the movie before though it was Alice's third time seeing it, and so when the doorbell rang, Alice grinned at Helena. "I'll get it," she said, assuming it was one of the kids who'd forgotten something. She kissed the top of Helena's hand and gently extricated herself.

She looked in the peephole, just in case and froze. "Oh fuck," she whispered quietly, pulling back and then peering into it again just to make sure she wasn't hallucinating. "Oh fuck."

Alice opened the door. "Yeah?" Alice asked coldly, her arms resting flat against her sides, her hands curling into tight fists. After everything she'd heard about this woman, it was hard not to punch her. For months, Alice wanted to punch Winnie, just once, just one good, solid punch. But Alice didn't want to do anything to jeopardize Helena's chances in the custody case and so she resisted. But it was hard, so very hard.

Winnie Mann stared back at Alice, unruffled by the cold reception. She gazed at Alice superciliously, her mouth curled into a faint sneer. "I'm here to speak to Helena."

Slightly panicked, Alice stared in the direction of the living room, knowing Helena's reaction to seeing her ex would not be good. Helena had been in such a good mood that day and now it was clearly going to be ruined.

"Darling?" Helena called. "Who's at the door?" she asked.

Alice could hear Helena's voice coming closer and knew Helena was walking toward the door. Undoubtedly, the lack of hearing excited children's voices piqued Helena's interest.

Alice watched Helena come into view and stop abruptly when the British woman spotted her ex at the door. Helena's expression moved from puzzled to shock to anger in span of just a second.

"Hello, Helena," Winnie said softly, pushing past Alice and moving toward Helena.

Helena immediately stepped back, her arms wrapping protectively around herself. "Why are you here?" she asked flatly, her eyes cold.

"I wanted to speak to you," Winnie said with a smile, reaching for Helena again.

Helena moved away. "What do you want to talk about?" Helena asked flatly.

Alice moved toward Helena to stand next to her.

"Us," Winnie said gently.

Helena blinked in surprise. "Us?" she asked blankly.

"May I speak to you in private?"

"No," Helena and Alice said in unison.

Winnie turned to look at Alice with disdain. "This doesn't concern you."

Helena's arms were still wrapped around herself and as she looked at Winnie hostilely. "If it concerns me, it concerns Alice," Helena said flatly, as she reached for Alice's hand, gripping it harder than she intended, her stiff posture clearly indicating her tension. Helena tried to smile reassuringly at Alice, but the smile faltered, and made Helena's face look sickly.

"Very well, then," Winnie said, stepping toward Helena. She reached up to touch Helena's face.

Helena flinched and jerked her head away, not allowing Winnie to touch her. "Don't touch me," Helena said quietly, just a tiny note of pleading in her voice for which she immediately hated herself.

"I want us to try again," Winnie said quietly. "Let's start over, Helena."

Helena and Alice looked at her in disbelief.

"I think you should leave," Alice said.

"What are you talking about?" Helena demanded, her eyes hard, her tone cold. Her grip on Alice's hand was firm.

"I want us to start over."

Helena laughed, though it was a sound devoid of joy or humor. "Perhaps you don't recall all the occasions I've asked you if we could start over," Helena said, her flat, harsh tone unable to mask the underlying hurt, "but you made it abundantly clear you did not want to." Helena paused. "You didn't love me," Helena said, her voice beginning to tremble ever so slightly. "And you never did. You told me so yourself, many times," she whispered. Helena clenched her jaw. "So what could possibly make you think we should get back together?" she demanded harshly.

"The children would be happy if we got back together," Winnie said. "This has been hard for them."

Helena's harsh expression faltered and her hold on Alice's hand loosened.

Alice stared at Helena, horrified. She knew Helena loved her. Loved her in a way she'd never felt from another human being. But she also knew Helena loved her children. Loved them enough to sacrifice her own happiness for theirs. The custody battle was painful to them and Helena knew it and she hated that her children were in pain. Alice knew. Alice knew Helena well enough to know the children always came first--as they should. Alice would never resent that.

Even as she felt Helena's hand in hers--the grip loosening, she could feel Helena slipping away. She could see Helena relenting, giving up, sparing her children any more pain from this very messy child custody battle. She could see Helena sacrificing her own happiness--accepting a life with a woman who had battered her heart, abused the trust Helena had placed in her, mocked every emotional, heart-felt declaration Helena had ever made and then flaunted every secret Helena had shared. Winnie had never supported her or loved her, never had given anything Helena wanted or needed. But Helena would pretend. She would pretend she was happy for the children. She would accept it, the same way she accepted everything else. It was Helena's peculiarly appealing form of self-sabotage.

"You don't love me," Helena whispered, flinching slightly as she said so.

"Yes, I do," Winnie said. Winnie stared into Helena's eyes. "I'm sorry for everything," Winnie said softly, reaching up to touch Helena's face. "I was angry with you."

Helena recoiled. "Why?" Helena whispered.

"I thought...you were being unfaithful to me," Winnie said.

"I was never unfaithful to you!" Helena exclaimed, pulling her hand away from Alice and moving toward Winnie, her hands reaching desperately toward her ex. Suddenly conscious of her actions, Helena pulled back, her arms dropping to her sides. "Never," Helena said emphatically.

Alice took a few steps backward, shoulders hunched and feeling defeated. She could definitely feel Helena slipping away from her, and the worst thing was, Alice knew everything Winnie was saying was just a ploy, a manipulation. No one who'd really known Helena, had loved her, would ever believe Helena was capable of infidelity.

"I know that now," Winnie said softly, pulling Helena forward by the front of her tank top and placed her hand on Helena's hip. "But you were spending so much time with Melina Phillips, do you remember?"

Helena's eyes widened. "We were merely working on a project together, Winnie!" she exclaimed, putting her hands on Winnie's arms. "I was never unfaithful to you, never. I love you," Helena said. At that precise moment, Helena's eyes widened in horror as she turned to glance at Alice, whose face fell the moment Helena spoke of loving Winnie in the present tense rather than the past tense. Teary brown eyes met horrified, apologetic blue and Helena tore away from Winnie to rush to Alice's side. "Alice, I--"

Alice could not quite meet Helena's eyes. "It's okay," she said. "I know you need to talk to her," she said quietly, stepping back and leaning against the wall. She couldn't bring herself to leave the room, even though she wanted to. She didn't want to leave and come back to find out that Helena had decided tot be with Winnie again. Alice glanced at Winnie and was infuriated to see the other woman was smirking. God, she hated that woman. And as much as she didn't want to be, she was angry with Helena, too, angry Helena still loved Winnie, although Alice could understand why because no matter how awful Winnie was, Helena wasn't the kind of person who could just stop loving someone. But she was angry and hurt that maybe she wasn't enough for Helena and she was scared that Helena could be taken away from her and she hated that Helena could be manipulated that way. And the entire thing did feel like a manipulation. And it was just like Winnie to somehow blame all her shitty behavior on Helena and it would be just like Helena to assume that she'd been the one at fault.

'Of course it would be like this,' Alice thought bitterly to herself. She'd been so close to being happy. She was happy, and Helena was happy, too. The kids were happy and well-adjusted and Helena was opening up to her more, they felt like an actual family. She'd been so close. They had been so fucking close to having everything they really wanted, so of course something like this had to happen. Just the day before they'd bowled with her friends, an they'd accepted Helena as part of their group and then Winnie had to come back and pull a stunt like this one. Alice had no idea why Winnie was doing this, but she knew Winnie was not being sincere. It was so obvious to her, but obviously, Helena wanted to believe Winnie was being sincere, and though Alice could see Helena was clearly suspicious, the hope in Helena's eyes was patently obvious.

She didn't think Helena wanted to get back together with Winnie, not really anyway, but Helena wanted to believe that Winnie had loved her at one point. And Alice knew Helena would get back together with Winnie if she thought it would make the children happy, even if the children were perfectly happy now. Helena idealized family, and even Alice could admit there was something romantic about the original family sticking it out and staying together, or in this case, coming back together. So in that sense, Alice was fearful, but less for herself and more for Helena who somehow was okay with settling for less.

Helena wanted to give Winnie the benefit of the doubt and it was obvious to Alice that when it came to Winnie, Helena had some kind of fatal blind spot because it was obvious to Alice that Helena was being manipulated. She wanted to say something, to tell Winnie to go away, to scream at her or something, but she wasn't sure if it was her place to do so. She wouldn't let Helena go without a fight, of course, because Helena was worth fighting for, but she also thought that this was ultimately something Helena had to decide for herself.

"I've never been unfaithful to you," Helena said, her voice thick with emotion as she looked at Winnie beseechingly. "How could you possibly think I could have--"

"I'm sorry," Winnie said, taking Helena's hands and holding them within her own. "It was just that I stopped in at your office and I heard you laughing with her, angel," Winnie said, "and you don't laugh that way anyone," Winnie smiled. "You're not very good with people, after all."

Helena flinched and then laughed shakily. "So the only time you came to visit me at the office, that's what you thought," Helena said quietly, her voice sad. "I'm sorry, Winnie," Helena said quietly. She frowned slightly. "What made you…why…" Helena shook her head, frustrated with her inability to articulate her thoughts. "What made you know I never…"

"I saw Melinda recently," Winnie said, "and I suppose I was a bit…shrill with her. But she informed me you two had never been…intimate and so…"

Helena pulled away from Winnie, retreating backward, her arms crossed in front of her. "You never told me. You never asked me."

"But once I knew the truth," Winnie said, stepping toward Helena. "I ended things with Katherine," Winnie said softly. "I want you. Give it a chance, Helena, you know how happy it would make the children."

Helena glanced at Alice who gazed at her, wide-eyed and then looked back at Winnie who reached for her. Winnie's hand wrapped roughly around Helena's wrists. Helena's face fell and she flinched slightly as Winnie yanked Helena toward her.

"Give us a chance, Helena."

Alice watched Helena's expression carefully, watched as Winnie grabbed Helena without an ounce of gentleness and pulled Helena toward her. Watched as Helena flinched slightly in pain as she lost her balance and stumbled forward. Alice's fists clenched at her sides and stalked toward her girlfriend and her girlfriend's ex. Alice grabbed a hold of Winnie's wrist and yanked her away from Helena. "Stop treating her that way," Alice snapped. Alice looked at Helena. "Are you okay?" she asked gently. It was disconcerting to see the effect Winnie had on Helena. Usually, Winnie was shrill and belligerent, shrieking and snapping at Helena. But this was a new side to Winnie for Alice and Alice could see that even now, Helena eagerly received even the smallest kindness from Winnie.

Helena looked at Alice, eyes round. She nodded slightly, gazing into Alice's eyes and looked so very apologetic. She rubbed at her wrist absently, Alice's actions seeming to pull her out of her daze. Helena tore her eyes away from Alice and looked at Winnie thoughtfully. "You and Katherine broke up?" Helena asked, finding her voice again.

"Of course," Winnie said.

"You ended it with her?"

"Of course, once I found out you've never strayed from me."

Helena looked at Winnie suspiciously, recalling the way Winnie had once told her she'd been a cash cow and nothing more. "You and Katherine Aberdeen broke up and now you want to get back together with me," Helena said, crossing her arms defensively in front of her chest.

"I broke up with Katherine because I wanted you back," Winnie corrected.

Helena wanted to believe this was true, that Winnie had only been so terrible to her because Winnie felt betrayed and wronged no matter how unjustified it was. But now that she was over the initial shock and over her natural instinct to believe everything Winnie told her, suspicion was sinking it. It seemed terribly suspicious Winnie and Katherine would break up in the same week that Helena's lawyer told her she had a good chance of full custody of the children because of the lack of stability in Winnie's life. Helena wasn't sure what Winnie's motivations were, but she suspected that it all had to do with money--after all, if Winnie didn't gain custody of the children, why would Helena have to give her any money? And Winnie had a definite attraction to women who had money and Katherine Aberdeen definitely had money. But then, Winnie didn't have Katherine Aberdeen anymore, did she?

Helena wanted to believe Winnie loved her once, because the thought she could have loved someone so much, shared so much of her life with a person who didn't love her at all was too painful. But Winnie had hurt her too often before and so Helena could not help but be suspicious no matter how much Winnie sounded sincere.

"Just give us a chance," Winnie said. "Think of everything we had. And how happy the children would be that we could stop fighting and get back together."

Alice sighed. Again with that. Helena wasn't easily manipulated, but when it came to the children and their happiness, Helena was vulnerable.

At that moment, the children ran to the door, giggling.

"Mommy! Alice!" Wilson and Jun Ying cried.

"You won't believe what happened!" Wilson yelled.

Wilson and Jun Ying ran inside the house and stopped short when they saw Winnie.

"Hi Mama," Wilson and Jun Ying said politely, walking to her and giving her a hug. The children pulled away and then looked at Helena and then at Alice and back to Helena again. Then they looked at one another and finally at Winnie, eyeing her warily.

Alice watched them and blinked at the wariness in their expressions when they looked at Winnie. It startled her, really, because the children always spoke affectionately of Winnie though they'd both indicated to her that they knew Helena and Winnie did not get along and Helena never let her own feelings for Winnie color the way she spoke of her ex in front of the children. This wariness of Winnie was unexpected. Alice's mind begged for Helena to see this, to understand this. She wished Helena would be able to see beyond the romantic promise of the original family being intact to the actual reality. That Jun Ying and Wilson would not be happy if Helena and Winnie got back together the way Winnie claimed. They were wary of Winnie. And more importantly, Wilson and Jun Ying would know Helena was unhappy, that Winnie simply wasn't good to her. The three shared a special kind of connection, and Alice knew Wilson and Jun Ying would be able to know Helena was unhappy, and when they got older, they would know the cause and hate themselves for it. And Helena would hate herself, and Alice wanted none of it.

But she didn't feel like it was her place to say. She wanted to tighten her hold on Helena. To wrap her in a warm embrace because Helena obviously needed a hug right now. But she didn't feel like it was her place. She wanted to fight, but she knew the choice would ultimately be Helena's-- the way Helena had let her make a choice once.

"Are you okay, Mommy?" Jun Ying asked hesitantly.

"I'm fine, darling, thank-you," Helena said, her voice trembling slightly. "Why don't you go into the playroom and watch a video and wait for me, babies?"

"Okay," the children said. "Bye Mama," they said, addressing Winnie, and eyeing her warily as they passed her.

Helena frowned slightly at their expressions.

"Bye Mommy," Wilson said, hugging her tightly around the waist.

"See you soon, Mommy," Jun Ying said, also hugging Helena tightly.

She held onto them, stroking their hair and staring down into their eager, concerned faces. It bothered her that they looked so troubled and she found herself absently following behind them because she wanted to find out why they looked so distressed.

"Babies, is something wrong?" she asked gently.

"Are you and Mama fighting again?" Jun Ying asked, her tiny voice a contrast to her blunt words.

Helena laughed softly. "No, my darling, we aren't fighting."

"Is Mama being mean to you?" Wilson asked, his hands tucked into the pockets of his shorts.

"No, my darling, she isn't," Helena said with a gentle laugh. "We're just talking."

"Is Mama being mean to Alice like she was mean to Tina?" Jun Ying asked quietly.

Helena's brow furrowed and she was at a loss for what to say to her children.

"Are you and Alice going to break up like you and Tina broke up because Mama was mean?" Wilson asked.

"Babies, Tina and I…" Helena trailed off awkwardly. "Your Mama had nothing to do with that."

Wilson reached out, placing his hand gently on Helena's cheek. "Jun and me don't like it when you're sad, Mommy," he said quietly. "And Mama makes you sad."

"Jun and I, darling," Helena corrected, out of instinct, though she smiled and covered his hand and held it. "And Mama doesn't make me sad."

"Mommy? Is Mama here because she's going to live with us again?"

"Yeah, is she?" Wilson asked.

"What would make you ask that, babies?" Helena asked, reaching for her darling, and pulling her in close so she could hold both her children close. She wondered if seeing Winnie in the house was raising the children's hopes they would get back together.

"Mama never comes into the house," Jun Ying said.

"Yeah," Wilson agreed.

Helena gazed at them, waiting for them to go on but then realized that was the end of it. There was nothing else, they thought Winnie may be moving in simply because she was in the house.

"Do you want your Mama and I to get back together?" Helena asked softly, stroking their hair. "Would that make you happy, babies?" Helena asked with a deliberately wide smile because she didn't want them to feel compelled to say "no" if they truly meant "yes."

Wilson and Jun Ying looked at one another in a silent exchange and then looked at Helena uncertainly.

"But Mama makes you sad, Mommy," Jun Ying said.

"And we don't want you and Alice to break up," Wilson said, his chin jutting out slightly. "And we like it when Alice is here."

Jun Ying grinned. "We like Alice." Jun Ying grinned playfully. "Are you going to marry Alice?" she asked.

Wilson giggled, "Yeah, are you?"

Helena smiled broadly. "Would you like that, babies?" she asked.

Jun Ying and Wilson nodded eagerly.

Helena smiled happily and then bit her lip, peering into her children's eyes. She wasn't sure if it was appropriate to talk about her personal life in such detail with her children, but she wanted to be sure that her children were happy and not just saying they were for her benefit simply because they knew Winnie had a tendency to make her miserable. "If your Mama and I promised we would try to get along better and not fight as much…would it make you happy if we got back together?"

Wilson and Jun Ying looked at one another, and then looked back at Helena, staring at her solemnly.

"It's okay that Mama doesn't live with us anymore, Mommy," Wilson said quietly. "We like it the way it is now."

"Yeah," Jun Ying agreed. "We like it the way it is now."

Helena's eyes pooled with tears, which she blinked back. "All right, babies," she said quietly.

The children looked at her, appearing distressed.

"Are you okay, Mommy?" Jun Ying asked hesitantly.

Helena laughed softly. "I'm very well, darling," she answered truthfully, grabbing her children and hugging them fiercely, satisfied that they were, in fact, truly happy even if they didn't have their Mommy and Mama living together anymore and that even if they were given that opportunity…well, they were happy with the way things were now.

She didn't want to get back together with Winnie, although she wanted to believe Winnie when the woman said she'd loved Helena. Helena knew she loved Alice, more than nearly anyone--except for Wilson and Jun Ying and they would always, always come first. So Helena knew that if it would have made the children happy, she would have gotten back together with Winnie because to some degree, she did believe in trying to make things work for the children. Granted there were some situations, such as ones involving some form of abuse where it could damage the children more to stay together than to split up, but Helena felt like this wasn't that kind of situation. If the children said it would make them happy, she would have done it even though Helena knew it would have torn her to shreds to leave Alice. But Helena believed parenting was about putting the children's happiness primary and her own happiness secondary to that. Maybe she was overcompensating because of her own childhood and her own relationship with her mother, but Helena knew Wilson and Jun Ying would always come first in her life.

But they were happy with the way things were--they adored Alice and the more Helena thought rationally about it, the more she could see that the children would be happier in a house where the two parental figures were obviously happy to be with one another. Helena knew that even if she were with Winnie, she would be thinking of Alice, and that wasn't fair to Winnie who Helena could admit she still cared for. No, this was the right choice, to stay with Alice, not to make a rash decision in reaction to something so unexpected.

When she walked out of the children's room, she saw that Winnie and Alice were still in the same place by the front door, glaring at one another. Alice was staring back at Winnie, her arms crossed in front of her, resolutely refusing to back down. Helena smiled fondly as she observed this, thinking of all the ways Alice was stronger than her and how much she'd come to rely and depend on Alice. And really, it impressed Helena that Alice wasn't backing down--she herself had backed down many times from the power of Winnie's glare.

She cleared her throat softly to announce her presence, and they each immediately turned to her, speaking simultaneously.

"Are the kids okay?" Alice asked.

"Are the children all right?" Winnie asked

"They're fine," Helena answered. She took a deep breath and approached Alice first, because she knew the blonde needed reassurance and she felt badly for not giving it to the blonde earlier. Alice was so incredibly patient and good to her and she felt terribly for the way she treated the blonde sometimes. "I love you," Helena whispered, hesitantly taking Alice's hand in hers and giving it a gentle squeeze. Helena's smile broadened when Alice grinned back at her. "Just a moment, darling," Helena said quietly. She released Alice's hand and approached Winnie, who was staring at her with such hostility, Helena flinched.

"Winnie," Helena said quietly. "I think…I think we could be friends, don't you think?" she asked hesitantly, looking at Winnie hopefully. "I think that would make the children happy."

Winnie snorted in derision. "You're a fucking fool, Helena," Winnie said, stalking toward the door. "She's going to get tired of you just like I got tired of you." She pushed her face close to Helena's. "You had your chance, Helena," Winnie said. "Remember that when a judge determines I'm the better parent and my children forget who you are." Winnie pushed past Helena and stomped out the door.

Helena stared after her, her expression so very naked and obvious in its hurt and pain.

Alice moved after Winnie, ready to grab Winnie by the arm and punch her, just once, her temper overtaking her and outrunning good sense. But then she saw the expression on Helena's face and was at her side immediately, Winnie forgotten. "Helena," Alice said quietly, her voice hushed.

Helena swallowed hard, thinking bitterly that for whatever reasons, Winnie's plea to get back together was a ruse. Helena could take a guess why--without a current cash source, Winnie decided to turn back to Helena. Helena bemoaned her foolishness and cursed how deeply she wanted to believe Winnie did once love her.

Helena turned to Alice. "I'm sorry, darling," she apologized, her voice thick with emotion. "For all of it. With her." She cupped the sides of Alice's face. "I didn't…" Helena's words choked in her throat and her face trembled. "I know I hurt you," Helena whispered, wincing as she did so because she didn't want to think of hurting Alice. There was a part of her that was terrified Alice would leave her now, because she felt that she'd be tested and had been proven lacking. And she wouldn't blame Alice for leaving. But she wanted to try to hold on anyway. "I'm sorry," Helena whispered again. "You're the one I love," Helena said desperately, "the only one I want to be with. I--"

Alice pressed her thumb against Helena's lips. "Hey," she said softly. "It's okay." She felt tears well in her eyes. "It did hurt," she acknowledged. "But I get it." Alice stepped away from Helena to gently shut the door and then took Helena by the hand. "Come on," she said. "I think we both could use a drink."

Helena laughed softly through her tears. "Darling," she said. "You have to know. I am so sorry. I--"

"I know you're sorry," Alice said quietly. "I love you, you know," Alice said, her expression strangely wistful. She smiled at Helena. "I want you to know I would have fought for you," Alice said, her voice low and quiet. "But I would have let you make your own choice, because you did the same for me once." Alice smiled at Helena. "Come on," she said. "Let's get that drink."
Alice knew Helena has felt there was something fundamentally wrong with her, that it was her fault Winnie never loved her, had used her. And no matter how much Alice tried to reassure Helena in ways big and small that there was nothing wrong with her, Alice knew Helena felt there was something so fundamentally unlovable about her, that she was blind to how truly horrible Winnie was. There was some part of Helena that brooded over it, wondered what she could have done to make Winnie love her, just a little. That Helena wondered what was so wrong with her that Winnie never loved her. And the day had proven that in spite of everything, a part of Helena would always love Winnie.

That bothered Alice, of course. But that was just who Helena was as a person. And Alice knew that she still loved Dana, so she couldn't expect Helena to stop loving Winnie even if Winnie was so awful to her. Alice had no idea what was going on with Winnie or what motivated Winnie's behavior. There were probably reasons, but Alice didn't care. All she cared about was that Winnie hurt Helena and for that, Alice would never forgive Winnie.

But now Alice hoped Helena could see it wasn't her fault. That it wasn't that she was unlovable, but that Winnie was just cruel.

So although she was upset about what happened, she couldn't be angry with Helena, didn't doubt that Helena loved her. Because maybe it was just something that had to happen.

Helena followed Alice toward the kitchen. She knew the discussion was far from over.

But that was okay because at the moment, all she felt was Alice's warm hand in hers leading her toward the kitchen.

She knew it would be okay.