*30 THINGS NEVER TO SAY TO A NAKED GUY*

1. I've smoked fatter joints then that!

2. Ahhh, that's so cute!

3. Why don't we just cuddle?

4. You know they have surgery to fix that.

5. Make it dance.

6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?

7. It's ok, we will work around it.

8. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?

9. Oh no...a flash headache.

10. (Giggle and point)

11. Can I be honest with you?

12. How sweet, you brought incense.

13. This explains your car.

14. Maybe if we water it, it will grow.

15. Wow, and your feet are so big.

16. Why is God punishing me?

17. At least this won't take long.

18. I never saw one like that before.

19. But it still works, right?

20. It looks so....unused.

21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.

22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?

23. Are you cold?

24. Maybe if you get me real drunk first.

25. Is that an optical illusion?

26. What is that?

27. It's good that you have so many other talents.

28. Does it come with an air pump?

29. So this is why you are supposed to judge people on personality.

30. I guess this makes me the early bird.

HOMEWARD!