Somewhere Out There

Lump Two.

When the eighth person walked into the room, Diana looked at her husband and tried to suppress her excited grin. “Alright,” Walker shushed all the little Hansons. “You guys know what this is about right?” He translated their silence to mean ‘Yes,’ and continued. “Think you can keep a secret? It’s very important to not tell Zac, okay?” Walker then put a finger to his lips for emphasis.

Jess groaned. “We know, we know Dad. Get on with it already!” Diana shot her a warning look and wondered if she got her impatience from Walker or her. She smirked. Definitely Walker.

Father Hanson eyed each and every child of his for three seconds - no more, no less. Then he started talking, “Zac is really into kung fu, have you noticed?”

Isaac scrunched up his nose, “Watching it, you mean?”

Taylor added his pennyworth. “Yeah, if you ask me, he watches way too many kung fu movies. It’s just gone past the stage of healthiness,” he muttered.

Walker took control again. “That’s not the point. Big Jason and Zac… just haven’t been getting along together recently. Well actually, they never hit it off from the start. I think-”

“He hates him?”

“Uhm… just let me finish. Jason is a good bodyguard as well as a good family friend. So-”

“That’s why you don’t want to fire him?”

“You could say it that way.” Walker sighed and look to his wife for help.

And help was just what came. Time for Momma to come to the rescue. “Everyone. Just listen. We’re thinking of getting another bodyguard. Jason… he’ll be with us at the airports, press conferences, concerts yadda yadda. The new one will be when we just want to go out, to the movies, shops, when you guys don’t want parents around but when we want you to still be safe. Relatively safe.”

Diana saw Taylor mouth to his brother, ‘When we don’t want parents around?’ So she answered, “Yes. When you don’t want parents around. This new body guard is a kid. Well, maybe not a kid, but he’s not an adult. He knows kung fu – very well. He’ll be the main part of Zac’s present. Now you can talk.”

Jessica was confused and what she said, covered what the rest of them were thinking. “But how can you say he’s Zac’s present? He won’t be Zac’s because you can’t just buy a person.”

Walker eyed his wife and chose his words carefully. “Sweetie.” He drew in a cautious breath. “It’s the same thing with Jason really. We hire him to look after you guys. They’re bodyguards, it’s their job. They want to be hired-”

Jess interrupted. “It’s not the same thing. Jason wasn’t a gift, he was - still is - a service. This kung fu boy, he’s gonna be like a possession, because you said you’re giving him to Zac.”

“I never.”

“Well, he’s Zac’s present. So isn’t he, Zac’s, now?”

Isaac agreed. “Dad, I don’t think it’s right, either. And this kung fu-ist, is he Asian?”

What did that have to do with anything? I did not bring my son up to be racist! Walker frowned, “Yes he is, Isaac. Do you have a problem with this?”

“There is a problem with it. Not the one you’re thinking of. I mean, Dad, do you remember the time we went to Singapore? Lots of people had Malaysian maids, because they were cheap. They were cheap, a different nationality and therefore worthy of being maids. Do you get what I’m saying?”

Taylor couldn’t see Ike’s point. “Ah, no. You lost me, bro.”

With his frown never leaving his face, Isaac continued. “I have a feeling there’ll be misunderstandings.”

”Explain them.”

“I can’t, I don’t exactly know what they will be. But… I just have a really bad idea about this kung fu person.” He paused for a bit. “Jason was fine, is fine. He worked well, I mean, we’re still alive. Aren’t we?”

Diana thought the gentle approach would work best. So, she cooed, “Honey, we’re not getting rid of Jason. We’re just hiring another bodyguard. Really, I think it will be fine. Besides, we’re the parents so you shouldn’t be worrying. Okay?”

Taylor, who had been quiet in thought said, “Can’t we just buy Zac lots and lots of kung fu movies?”

Walker spoke up, “We’ve thought of that. But for some time now, we’ve been thinking of getting another bodyguard. We can try it, and if it doesn’t work, fine.”

The three littlest Hansons were looking extremely droopy-eyed so Diana took them to bed.

With only Walker, Isaac, Taylor and Jess in the room, a secret was let out. “Actually,” said Walker, “We’ve already made the deal with Tech.”

Again, with his Dawson Leery eyebrow thing, Taylor asked, “I presume, he’s the kung fu boy?”

Father Hanson smiled, “Well, you’re quick off the block Tay.”

“What does he look like?” Jess wondered.

Ike teased, “Why, you interested?”

Ignoring her brother, she asked another question. “You said he wasn’t a grown up. So how old is he?”

Isaac nudged his sister and was about to comment but Jess was too quick.

“Talk to the hand!”

Walker felt he’d better butt in. “Guys, please. Jess, I’m not bothering to answer you because you’ll be meeting him on Wednesday.”

H’mm. “Dad,” the middle son frowned, “So, it’s really happening? The deal’s official? You didn’t even bother to ask us, you just went off and done it?”

“Well, your mother and I really didn’t feel the need to. We didn’t think you guys’d have such strong views.”

Jess could see Taylor was about to start a massive argument so she did what she could to prevent it. “Tay, see it as an adventure.”

“What are you talking about?” He asked with clear annoyance.

“I mean, how often do you see professional kung fu guys showing their stuff?” She raised her eyebrow at her own question. “That didn’t come out right. Anyway, this could turn out to be really cool! I actually can’t wait to meet him!”

He sulked, “Just ‘cause you’re a girl.”

“Enough,” Walker exclaimed. “We’re meeting Tech on Wednesday and it’s final. Taylor, see it from Zac’s point of view. He will be thrilled and don’t you want to see him happy? Less of Jason, more of his kung fu idols. Besides, now you don’t have to have this huge muscle man following you around to attract even more attention, when you want to be discrete.” He drew in a deep breath. “Isaac, I can see your point. Yes, hiring Tech is taking a risk but you’ll never get anywhere in life if you don’t take risks.” Walker sighed, he knew that sounded corny. But hey, he was a Dad, so it was okay to be corny. He continued, “The three of you, just come on Wednesday with with open eyes. Just give Tech a shot, he deserves a chance!” Woah, I’m getting too deep for my own good. By grinning at his own thoughts, Walker broke the tension. “There’s nothing else to be discussed. Go brush your teeth and go to bed.”

So they did. The three of them walked away, a little excited to meet this Tech person, their new bodyguard. Even Taylor, though he would never admit to it.

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