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THIS FIRE

  This work is dedicated to the inner fire of all life. May our seeds of light open, brighten, and sow peace on earth.



Personnel: Paula Cole, vocals, piano, Juno, tube Wurlitzer, harmonium, beat box, toy xylophone, didjeridu, clarinet Jay Bellerose, drums, percussion Tony Levin, bass, Chapman stick; Greg Leisz, guitars, pedal and lap steel Seamus Egan, uillean pipes, whistle Gerry Leonard, guitar on "Carmen" and "Hush, Hush, Hush"

Producer: Paula Cole

Guest: Peter Gabriel, vocals on "Hush, Hush, Hush"

The release of Paula Cole's debut album, Harbinger, marked the arrival of an extraordinary vocalist and songwriter with a startling gift for conveying her most revealing emotions through music. This Fire, is an immensely satisfying follow-up, potlighting Paula's emergence as both producer and pianist while giving voice to a passionate set of new songs.

Paula has won the admiration of her fellow musicians. Melissa Etheridge asked Paula to join her for the original Duets broadcast on VH-1. Paula has also toured as a member of Peter Gabriel's band (Gabriel returns the favor here with a guest vocal on "Hush, Hush, Hush").

Paula is an unforgettable live performer who has drawn raves for the intensity of her shows.

Discography: Harbinger (4/2-46041)


Last Update - 26/04/98 15:55:51


MIDs

Paula Cole - Cowboys.mid
Paula Cole - I Don't Want to Wait.mid
Paula Cole - Feelin love.mid
Paula Cole - Mississippi.mid
Paula Cole - Throwing Stones.mid


VIDEOS

Video - Paula Cole - ME.mov
Video - Paula Cole - I Don't Want to Wait.mov
Video - Paula Cole - Cowboys.mov


PICTURES

Pic 1 Pic 2 Pic 3 Pic 4 Pic 5 Pic 6


LYRICS



Harbinger

Happy Home

I remember the pain in my mother's eyes,
I remember the pain of her compromise years ago.
I always wanted to help to make it go away,
I didn't know it was her freedom that she needed so.

And she said to me, she said to me:

He hitch-hiked to Maine,
We went cross-country.
I had to leave my home,
I had to raise a family
We did the best we could being so young,
We tried to hard to build a happy home.

I never knew what to say to anybody,
I didn't know what to do, I was far too young.
But everybody could feel the suffocation,
Underneath for facade of a happy home.
And she said to me, she said to me:

Chorus

Home sweet freedom, flowing in my eyes, Home sweet freedom, flowing in my mind.

Sacrificed her dreams to motherhood,
Waiting and waiting to be understood fully.
Sacrificed her years to the family,
Waiting and waiting to be heard finally.

And she said to me, she said to me...

I Am So Ordinary

I nearly died I suicided softly
I saw her shadow through the cafe window
I watched you lean across the table
I watched you whisper in her ear

And she is your holy Mary
And I am so ordinary
And you can use me if you want to
I know you need me just like an old soft shoe

She looks like me but a bit prettier
She's a skater and a ballet dancer
I saw her on your motorcycle
In the seat I thought was meant for me

Chorus

And when your mother came to Boston you disappeared
And then I saw you three together
I guess she makes the best impression
With her charming femininity...

Chorus

Oh but I am the one you will call when alone
And I am the one who will give when she's gone
And so I give
So I give

I tell myself that love is truly giving
Somehow I justify this
Hoping you will understand me
Hoping you will love me back

And she is your holy Mary
And I am so ordinary
And she is your Queen Cleopatra
And I'm just your morning after
And she is your Star Spangled Banner
And I am just Frere Jaque
And you can lose me if you want to

And I am so ordinary

Saturn Girl

Lost in another world, oh Saturn, Saturn Girl.

Far away, ot an infinite world I escape
I'm clear and calm, I'm unafraid.
Sunless days, in my sheltered Milky Way
In Saturn's rings I feel no pain.

In my heart, in my head
Oh, Saturn Girl has always bled
No you're not, from this world
Saturn Girl.

I can't explain, why I don't belong to the same world
I don't fit in, and I will not stay.
I want to fly, oh I long for my violet skies
My astral nights, my peace of mind.

Chorus

Lost in another world, oh Saturn, Saturn Girl.
Saturn Girl, I'd rather be lost in my empyrean world
Than be down on earth.

Chorus

Everybody tries to break my dreams to break through,
They don't believe in my words, they don't believe in my world.
"Oh you're lost in another world,
Oh you're lost you Saturn Girl, oh you crazy girl,
Oh you Saturn Girl"...

Chorus

Watch The Woman's Hands

Watch the woman's hands as she cultivates the land,
As she plants the seed, as she's on her knees.
Watch her fingers smile as she holds the little child,
As she holds him, as she holds him.

Watch the woman's hands as she holds her children back,
From the danger, from the danger.
Watch how they fight to keep the family tight
Together, together.

Oh we need her, oh we need her.
Oh we need her, oh we need her.

Watch the woman's hands, as she talks to the man,
As he talks down to her, as he tells her.
He doesn't understand, he doesn't see the fisted hands
Clenched tightly, angrily.

Oh we need her, oh we need her.
Oh we need her, oh we need her.

Bethlehem

Pulling on the apron strings looking up
Standing on the chair to be grown up
I feel so little, I need my pillow
I hate the time, I hate the clock
I want to be a dog or I want to be a rock

Sunday's pancakes Miss Mary Mack
Color Polariods show my heart attack
In my second-hand pants and dusty shoes
The day that the playground laughed at my shoes

It's my birthday next week and what I want please
Is to turn on the heat so the fish won't freeze
The fish in the tank froze and died last week
Oh I want to be a dog or I want to be a leaf

Quarry miners, fishermen
In my town of Bethlehem
Picket fences, church at ten
No star above my Bethlehem

Now I'm only 16 and I think I have an ulcer
I'm hiding my sex behind a dirty sweatshirt
I've lost five pounds these past few days
Trying to be class president and get straight A's, well,
Who gives a shit about that anyway?
I want to be a dog or a lump of clay

Chorus

Still I'm tired of standing still
Tired of living - still
Everyday I dream of leaving

Everybody's talking about Becky's bust
The boys on the basketball team just fuck
The same ten girls, who don't know who they are
They're looking for some comfort in the back of a car
The six-packs of beer, the locker room jeers
I don't want to be me, I don't want to be here

Chorus

Red brick schoolhouse, dead end dirt roads, daffodils
No star above my Bethlehem

I want to be a dog or I want to be a rock
I don't want to be me, I don't want to be here
Bethlehem

Chiaroscuro

Goya and El Greco, Gaugin and Van Gogh
Painted light in the darkness, chiaroscuro
Imagine we were a painting
A woman and a man,
Two lovers on a canvas
On is white, one is black.

Darkness and light will be married tonight in chiaroscuro
Your body on mine - two colors combined in chiaroscuro

Vermeer and Velazquez, Rembrandt and Rousseau
Painted perfect union, chiaroscuro
The man and the woman
The knife and the spoon
The xylem and the phloem
The sun and the moon

Chorus

How we lived a secret life from racist eyes
You said I couldn't understand you anyway I tried

But in this moment together, in our secret unity
Our skins become the still life, our souls epiphany

Black Boots

Why do you think she wears those black boots...
Why do you think she dyes her hair black...

She's awfully insecure
She's trying to be cool
She's hoping to be more in those,
black boots.

Why do I think I wear those black boots...
Why do I wear three pairs of black boots...

I feel a little stronger
I feel a little taller
I identify with the color
I like myself in these
black boots.

Oh John

Oh John, oh John, oh John

Never lose the memory of April twenty-six
Your hands designed my body
You autographed my hip
I lost all my worry
I lost all sense of time
My fears evaporated
When you held me in your oh my god and

Oh John, in a New York hotel room
In a truck off the back road
Southwest of Chicago
Oh John, in a New England fairground
on a lawn in the backyard
in a town in Colorado, oh
Oh John, oh John, oh John

Saturate my consciousness with sweet elixir wine
Your body is the chalice your spirit is the vine
I lose all my worry
I lose all sense of time
My fears evaporate
When you hold me in your oh my god and

Chorus

And everytime I see the ocean you're there
And everytime I see the forest you're on my mind
In my life, flooding me with memories like

Chorus

Our Revenge

Walking the mountain is easy for the medicine
Man who follows makes sure the Indian
Never returns

His revenge, his revenge
Rising
His revenge, his revenge
Rising

White is the man with the pen who's writing the story
of life

Our revenge, our revenge, rising
Our revenge, our revenge, rising
Our revenge, our revenge, rising
Our revenge, our revenge, rising, rising, rising

Dear Gertrude

Tell me how the story will unfold,
I know you see everything.
Tell me all about the torch and scroll,
I know you know everything.

So why do you come to me?
Why when I'm sleeping?
Why am I the only one who knows you're there?
Why, why?

My dear, my dear Gertrude,
My dear, lonely soul,
My dear, my dear Gertrude,
My dear, my dear, my dear.

Tell me all about your history,
Tell me all about your pains.
Try to contact all your lost loved ones,
Try to speak to them through me.

So why do you come to me?
Why when I'm sleeping?
Why am I the only one
who knows you're there?
Why, why?

Chorus

You're so lonely in my body,
I can sympathize your pain.
But the secret is too much
for me to hold,
No, no one will believe.

Hitler's Brothers

Litte boy, tries to hide,
From the fire in his backyard.
Burning cross, white cloth,
It's the second time this year.

Hitler's brothers are still alive,
They're wearing everyday disguises.

A woman runs, for asylum,
She's the only one of her kind in this neighborhood.
She knows who they were,
They don't believe a word,
The cops just turn their heads to protect their friends.

Hitler's brothers are still alive,
Their army seems to grow in size,
Hitler's brothers are on the rise,
They're wearing everyday disguises.
...In camouflage or business suits.

Another man, bound and gagged,
Tied upon the railroad tracks.
At nine p.m. the B&M (Boston & Maine)
Rolled across his yellow skin

Hitler's brothers are still alive,
Their army seems to grow in size,
Hitler's brothers are on the rise,
They're wearing everyday disguises.
In camouflage or business suits,
Checkered aprons, combat boots,
Time to let those feelings go,
Hatred only kills your souls.

She Can't Feel Anything Anymore

She was on the floor, her face was in her mother's arms.
She had said that she'd been out late with the boys.
Just another evening, like every other evening
Everything is all the same it seems.

Danny always called her on the phone for no special reason,
apparently,
He could never tell her what it was, he suffered silently,
quitely.

Just another evening, but his hands just couldn't be still,
He can't control it and he cannot tell her why,
Feel the beaded knuckles, feel the snap inside,
See the rush of terror in her eye,
She can't feel it
She can't feel it
She can't feel anything anymore

He tried painfully, he begged for her forgiveness on his knees,
She gave gracefully, but inside,
but inside,
She still bleeds.

Garden of eye

Here I am, a black-eyed bird, remaining silent.
I simply watch, your little life from high above.
Wanting to call you, wanting to sing,
Inside your ears and lips and eyes and soul,
I dig my grave, behind the gates of Babylon.

There's a Garden of Eden
In your distant heart,
Garden of Eden
In your earthly arms.

Here I stand, a serpent queen of the garden.
I'm beckoning, but you ignore my siren song.
Oh I long, to touch you, to step inside your sacred gate.
I'll dig my grave in the middle of golden bible snake.

There's a Garden of Eden
In your distant heart,
Garden of Eden
In your earthly arms.

The black-eyed bird is dying,
The queen is dead,
She'll never step foot in Eden.

There's a Garden of Eden
In your distant heart,
Garden of Eden
In your earthly arms.

The Ladder

Climbing, climbing, climbing, climbing...

Look, at how futile this is,
I'm so weak, so fragile, so torn.
Going round and round, going inside
To the circle, to the ladder, to the sky

I am climbing a ladder of urgency
Climbing a ladder of hope
Climbing a ladder of my emotions
Climbing a ladder of unraveling rope.

You see, what you want to see,
But I'm not, what you wanted, no I'm not.
I am only one thing, one thing I see,
One thing I feel.

Chorus

Climbing...
I am only one thing, one thing I see, one thing I feel
I am the ladder.




This Fire

Tiger

where do i put this fire
this bright red feeling
this tiger lily down my mouth
he wants to grow to twenty feet tall

CHORUS:

i've left bethlehem
i feel free
i've left the girl i was supposed to be and
someday i'll be born

i'm so tired of being shy
i'm not that girl anymore
i'm not that straight A anymore
now i want to sit with my legs wide open and
laugh so loud that the whole damn restaurant
will turn and look at me and say
look at the tiger jumping out of her mouth

chorus

no more sex-starved teachers
trying to touch my ass
i can finally be a teenager at age twenty-six
go to hell lions, tigers, and bears
i'm not afraid of you anymore
and my fear broke apart like fifty balloons
and i'm thrown around the room like party confetti now

chorus

someday i'll be born
someday someday someday i'll be born
someday someday someday i'll be born
high and noon (13 times)

Where Have All The Cowboys Gone ?

oh you get me ready in your 56 chevy
why don't we go sit down in the shade
take shelter on my front porch
he dandy lion sun scorching,
like a glass of cold lemonade
i will do laundry if you pay all the bills

CHORUS:

where is my john wayne
where is my prairie song
where is my happy ending
where have all the cowboys gone

why don't you stay the evening
kick back and watch the TV
and I'll fix a little something to eat
oh I know your back hurts from working on the tractor
how do you take your coffee my sweet
i will raise the children if you pay all the bills

chorus

i am wearing my new dress tonight
but you don't, but you don't even notice me
say our goodbyes (3 times)

we finally sell the chevy
when we had another baby
and you took the job in tennessee
you made friends at the farm
and you joined them at the bar
almost every single day of the week

chorus

i will wash the dishes while you go have a beer
where is my marlboro man
where is his shiny gun
where is my lonely ranger
where have all the cowboys gone
yippee aw, yippee yea (3 times)

Throwing Stones

so call me a bitch in heat and
i'll call you a liar
and we'll throw stones until we're dead

there you go again you cut me off from talking
you bask in the glory
the center of the circle
all the friends think you're a comedian
so kind and generous
but i am suffering

away from here
i wanna be
away from here
away from here
away from every little thing
every little thing
i used to love your every little, every little thing

now you call me a bitch in heat and
i call you a liar
and we'll throw stones until we're dead

you're the puppeteer and i'm the puppet
you manipulate me with your (real) catholic shit
everytime i try to talk it through
you turn it around and make us out to be
david and goliath

away from here
i wanna be
away from here
away from here
away from every little thing
every little thing
i used to love your every little every little thing

now you call me a bitch in heat and
i'll call you a liar
and we'll throw stones until we're dead

your arms beneath me
your lying inside me
i used to love your every little every little thing
your eyes blue stars
your hand in my purse
and now i hate your every little everything all day

oh mama
i didn't know life was this hard
oh mama
my innocence has been tarred

my inner vision, dulled and darkened
i keep myself away to you
i fuck my sorrow humblely
and throw my crown upon the ground

it's you i hope for
and us i pray for
and me that i believed was wrong
but now my anger is my best friend
be careful i may bite your head off

liar

so call me a bitch in heat and
i'll you a liar
and we'll throw stones until we're dead

so call me a bitch in heat and
i'll you a mother fucker
and we'll throw stones until we're dead

Carmen

carmen, i don't know i don't know i don't know if i can go back
carmen i'll never be never be never be the same again
carmen (6 times)

the way you set the table
the way you lean to tell me something soft
the way i can see into you
the way you tell me i talk too much about myself
it's true i talk too much about myself
but right now, right now all i wanna talk about is you now

carmen, i don't know, i don't know, i don't know if i can go back
carmen i'll never be, never be, never be the same again
carmen (6 times)

i love the way you think
is it biological or all the acid
you've eaten
just take me into your body
i wanna be drunk i wanna be high
i wanna be drunk i wanna be high on you

carmen, i don't know, i don't know, i don't know if i can go back
carmen i'll never be, never be, never be the same again
carmen (6 times)

i don't know i don't know i don't know
i don't know i don't know i don't know
if i can go go go go go go go go back home

i don't know i don't know i don't know
i don't know i don't know i don't know
if i can be (happily sane) again

Mississippi

i know i'm big and proud all over
not just on the stage
my secret self has many sides
that laugh and crush and sting
i'm red and thick like fire
i like it from behind
(round to back)
red to white
i'm pure inside and silent

CHORUS:
i'm alive
gotta piece of my heart
on the sole of your shoe
i've got a little bit of thunder
trapped inside of a cloud
the dog in you
spit me out into the mississippi

i know who can love my many selves
the wife the bitch the rapunzel
the one who cries
and calls for you
the one who is always alone

chorus

oh mississippi
come and wash my pain away
oh mississippi
come and take my pain away
i feel i'm drowning
i feel i'm drowning
i feel i'm
i feel i'm
dying

chorus (3 times)

Nietzsche's Eyes

how many times did
i have to hear you say to me
self obsessed artist
center of your universe
well i believed your every word
and i believed you were my god

CHORUS:
nietzsche's eyes
nietzsche's kind
failed in (flight) to us
and all my love

grandmother
mother
and now i see it in myself
i take on the water
until the dam threatens to break
i became a little doll
my voice became too small

chorus

i'm shaken
i'm shaken
i'm getting down this fantasy
and i'm shaken
i'm shaken
i'm getting down this
getting down this
you were not my superman
i didn't know
just how i felt
all my love
i'm shaken
i'm
i'm getting down this
you were not my superman

i wasn't honest
i tried to philosphize
only too late did
i see i wore nietzsche's eyes
now that i step back to see
i haven't been me
and all my love

chorus

i'm shaken
i'm shaken
i'm getting down this fantasy
and i'm shaken
i'm shaken
i'm getting down this
getting down this (9 times)

Road to Dead

dead dead dead dead walking down to the road to dead (9 times)

welcome to the church of me
where they stand in a line (???)
of water from my eyes
and a song for comfort
you say it's jesus christ
well, i feel like him
i feel one, two, three
nails through me and
four through the heart

CHORUS:
you walk the road to resurrection
and i walk the road to dead
and i'm giving you my devoution
but i walk the road to dead

i held you
and wrapped you in the heat of my hand
and prayed for us
now i want you back
as you walk away from my love
you need need
strength is threatening
i filled you will faith
and that filled me with pain
what the hell am i doing

falling in love with pain again and again and again and again

chorus (2 times)

dead dead dead dead walking down to the road to dead ( 8 times )

Me

i am not the person who is singing
i am the silent one inside
i am not the one who laughs at people's jokes
i just pacify their egos
i am not my house or my car or my songs
they are only just stops along my way
i am like the winter
i'm a dark cold female
with a golden ring of wisdom in my cave

CHORUS:
and it is me who is my enemy
me who beats me up
me who makes the monsters
me who strips my confidence

i am carrying my voice
i am carrying my heart
i am carrying my rhythmn
i am carrying my prayers
but you can't kill my spirit
it's soaring and it's strong
like a mountain
i go on and on
but when my wings are folded
the brightly colored moth
blends into the dirt into the ground

chorus

and it's me who's too weak
and it's me who's too shy
to ask for the thing i love
and it's me who's too weak
and it's me who's too shy
to ask for the thing i love
that i love (6 times)

i am walking on the bridge
i am over the water
and i'm scared as hell
but i know there's something better
yes i know there's something
yes i know, i know, yes i know

that i love (5 times overlapping chorus)

but it's me
and it's me
but it's me (4 times)

Feelin' Love

love, love

you make me feel like a sticky pistil
leaning into a stamen
you make me feel like a mr. sunshine
himself
you make me feel like splendor in the grass
while we're rollin'
damn skippy baby
you make me feel like the amazon's runnin' between
the thighs

CHORUS:
you make me feel loved, loved, loved, loved, loved
loved, loved, loved, loved, loved
you make me feel loved, loved, loved, loved, loved
loved, loved, loved, loved

you make me feel like a candy apple
red and horny
you make me feel like i wanna be a dumb blonde
in a centerfold, the girl next door
and i would open the door and
i'd be all wet
with my tits soaking through this tiny (felt) t-shirt
that i'm wearing
and you would open the door and tie
me up to the bed

chorus

loved, but i don't know who i am
am i barry white
am i hot inside
what would i place with your hot conscious
oh baby babe babe babe
i will be your death, the moonlight
take your time

you make me feel (3 times)

you make me feel loved

Hush Hush Hush

long white arms
losing their strength and form
sixty year man on twenty year old skin
skeleton, your eyes have lost their warmth
look to your father for some support

CHORUS:
hush hush hush
says your daddy's touch
sleep sleep sleep
says the hundredth sheep
peace peace peace
may you go in peace

cruel joke you waited so long to show
the one that you wanted wasn't a girl
all your life you kept it hidden inside
now when you step
you stumble
you die

chorus

oh maybe next time
you'll be henry the VIII
wake up tomorrow, alexander the great
open your eyes in a new life again
oh maybe next time
you'll be given a chance

hush hush hush
hush hush hush
hush hush hush
hush hush hush
hush...

I Don't Want to Wait

so open up your morning light
and say a little prayer for I
you know that if we are to stay alive
and see the peace in every I

she had two babies
one was six months one was three
in the war of '44
every telephone ring
every heartbeat stinging
when she thought it was God calling her
oh would her son grow to know his father

CHORUS:
i don't want to wait
for our lives to be over
i want to know right know
what will it be
i don't want to wait
for our lives to be over
will it be yes or will it be
sorry

he showed up all wet
on the rainy front step
wearing shrapnel in his skin
and the war he saw
lives inside him still
it's so hard to be gentle and warm
the years passed by and now
he has granddaughters

chorus

oh so you look at me
from across the room
you're wearing your anguish again
believe me, i know the feeling
it sucks you into the jaws of anger
oh, so dig a little more deeply into my life
all we have is the very moment
and i don't want to do what
his father and his father and his father did
i want to be here now

so open up your morning light
and say a little prayer for I
you know that if we are to stay alive
and see the peace in every I

chorus (2 times)

so open up your morning light
and say a little prayer for I
you know that if we are to stay alive
and see the love in every I




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