From Yanavira's Home page

I have excerpted here ((with my comments)) the following from the home page of Nyana, or Yanavira: http://sutra.homepage.com/ Thanks, Nyana. I appreciate your efforts! I recommend to visit this site and check especially the opinion page for issues related to the life in modern society. In the notes that follow, I put underline and my comments in parenthesis for my purpose. (9/23/00)

Contents (total 39 pages)

Yanavira's words *

The following words are from my friend, Yanavira's personal note found on the internet. Unfortunately, his home page is not there any more. I rearranged the wording with pertinent titles I thought valid. These are excerpts from "From Daily Note" Section below.

On Anger

When the sun of observation shines, a great shift will soon develop, thus you can see everything very cleary. Your anger will disappear just after you realize and see it. Here you may train your mental that will give you the ability to observe yourself in daily life whenever to do so. What you mean by "free, spontaneous action" is really blind reaction which is always harmful. By learning to observe yourself, you will find that wherever a difficult situation arises in life, you can keep the balance of your mind. With the balance, you can choose freely how to act, which is always positive, beneficial for you and for all others.

On Money

Many have exchanged monetary wealth for stress that is the price of the wonderful feeling of being rich. In the beginning for some lucky ones who can make it rich, they can fulfill most of their obligations without many obstacles. Once they have raised a certain 'status quo', problems begin. They will struggle at all cost to maintain this identity since that is what the struggle is all about. In the process, they become more stressful and their ways of dealing with through suppression is totally wrong for it is a temporary relief. It is more of an escape when it comes to the real thing. How many of the rich prefer sitting meditations? How many of the elite like to hear the Truth?

On Fear

Remember, the only fear we have to be aware of is the FEAR itself. The content of fear may be intense and gripping, so much that it overwhelmed us completely. But when we look beyond that content, what do we find? Pure energy, energy which, if we focus on it directly, will begins to reveal its own nature. Then instead of filling us with agitation, the energy of fear can actually lead us to a state of exhilaration, or intense concentration or love.

On Ignorance
I thought happiness and sadness are reactive states of mind supported by various factors which are likened to the changing scenes on a cinema screen of film show. You agree, don't you?

On Society:

It is a cold society, as cold as I perceived years ago. Nowadays people simply do not care. It's so tragic that relationships i.e friendship and marriage are no longer based on human warmth and kindness, but on television and internet. Perhaps we should see relationships in a different light. After all, concern and care generate warm feelings more than anything else in the human sphere.

On Making Decision:

Any decision made… must be accompanied by wisdom and common sense. Important issues are best lefts with considerations, which must be felt in the heart when thinking roams through the head. For this purpose, I wait and see my own reaction first. The way of the world is to act hastily with judgment based on discriminations rather than 'pause and scrutinize' when a sensory perception takes place.

On Observation

I am sure it must be a very wonderful mind experience: be surrounded by a hundred chattering minds and be both one and separate with them... I call it observation. Observation in the strictest sense is without the knower during any given moment of time. The knower usually comes after that in the form of knowledge and discrimination. In other words, the knower is a bundle of memories--in different dimensions.

On Searching Mind

Unfortunately we have forgotten that any search is a bondage, for search creates a target or an object. The desire to fulfill this target creates another illusory subject, which craves, expects and eventually ends up in frustration if fail.

I ask many people and most of them said the same thing what they're looking for in meditation. A peace. It is understandable, however in my experiences, it is what we have to drop first from our head before starting to meditate. Peace is not about getting high, is it? It isn't hypnotism. The essence is to harmonize, sort out imbalance & comprehend the truth. A way to rejuvenate system of body by bringing together our mind in awareness and equanimity.

On Meaning of Theory, Words

A theory is a theory, not a reality. All that a theory can do is remind me of certain thoughts that were part of my reality then. A statement or a 'fact' is an emphasis--one way of looking at something. At worst is a kind of myopia. A name is also just one way of seeing. I can't make a statement about a reality without omitting many other aspects that are also true. Even if it were possible to say everything, still I would not have a reality; I would only have the words.In fact, what I see changes even as I describe it.

On Seeing

…Live with a perfect intensity and beauty that never fade. You see a scenery from a little hole ventilation. .. Perhaps you will not really know how to "look" at the scenery. The mind is too full of concepts and knowledge, ambitions and desires...To see the scenery in a real meaning needs a humble nature of little child. .. if you see as the first time you see, as you have not seen before, as a baby who just opened his eyes, free from anything... The activity of seeing will be a very natural experience.

* Suffering, impermanence, and no-self

To make clear the concept of no-self (anatman), Buddhists set forth the theory of the five aggregates or constituents (khandhas) of human existence: (1) corporeality or physical forms (rupa), (2) feelings or sensations (vedna), (3) ideations (sañña), (4) mental formations or dispositions (sankhara), and (5) consciousness (viññana). Human existence is only a composite of the five aggregates, none of which is the self or soul. A person is in a process of continuous change, with no fixed underlying entity. ((A candle flame analogy, Go-on-kai-ku: five khandhas are void.))

* The four noble truth

Awareness of these fundamental realities led the Buddha to formulate the Four Noble Truths: the truth of misery, the truth that misery originates within us from the craving for pleasure and for being or nonbeing, the truth that this craving can be eliminated, and the truth that this elimination is the result of a methodical way or path that must be followed. Thus, there must be an understanding of the mechanism by which a human being's psychophysical being evolves; otherwise, human beings would remain indefinitely in samsara, in the continual flow of transitory existence.

* The law of dependent origination

((This also relates to 12 In-nen.)) Thus, the misery that is bound up with all sensate existence is accounted for by a methodical chain of causation. ((Here is a relationship to karma and the story of burning candle as an expression of our existence. Continuity of ever-changing identity.))

* Eightfold path

Given the awareness of this law, the question arises as to how one may escape the continually renewed cycle of birth, suffering, and death. Here ethical conduct enters in. It is not enough to know that misery pervades all existence and to know the way in which life evolves; there must also be a purification that leads to the overcoming of this process. Such a liberating purification is effected by following the Noble Eightfold Path constituted by right views, right aspirations, right speech, right conduct, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, and right meditational attainment. The term right (true or correct) is used to distinguish sharply between the precepts of the Buddha and other teachings.

* Nirvana

The aim of religious practice is to be rid of the delusion of ego, thus freeing oneself from the fetters of this mundane world. One who is successful in doing so is said to have overcome the round of rebirths and to have achieved enlightenment. This is the final goal--not a paradise or a heavenly world.

My dear friends, suppose someone is holding a pebble and throws it in the air and the pebble begins to fall down into a river. After the pebble touches the surface of the water, it allows itself to sink slowly into the river.

It will reach the bed of the river without any effort. Once the pebble is at the bottom of the river, it continues to rest. It allows the water to pass by.

I think the pebble reaches the bed of the river by the shortest path because it allows itself to fall without making any effort. During our sitting meditation we can allow ourselves to rest like a pebble. We can allow ourselves to sink naturally without effort to the position of sitting, the position of resting.

Resting is a very important practice; we have to learn the art of resting. Resting is the first part of Buddhist meditation. You should allow your body and your mind to rest. Our mind as well as our body needs to rest. ((Rest: Be grounded))

The problem is that not many of us know how to allow our body and mind to rest. We are always struggling; struggling has become a kind of habit. We cannot resist being active, struggling all the time. We struggle even during our sleep.

It is very important to realize that we have the habit energy of struggling. We have to be able to recognize a habit when it manifests itself because if we know how to recognize our habit, it will lose its energy and will not be able to push us anymore.

==

Ten years ago I was in India visiting the ex-untouchable community of Buddhists. A friend who belonged to the caste organized the trip for me. I was sitting on the bus, enjoying the landscape outside, contemplating the palm trees and the vegetation. Suddenly I turned and I saw him looking very tense. There was no reason why he had to be tense like that. I thought that he was trying to make my visit pleasant and maybe that was the reason he was so tense. I told him, "Dear friend, I know that you want to make my trip pleasant, but I am already very happy. I've already enjoyed the trip. So why don't you sit back, smile, and relax?" He said, "Okay," and he sat back and he tried to relax.

I was pleased and I turned my face toward the window again and I enjoyed the palm trees and other things. But just a few minutes after when I looked back at him he was as tense as before. He was not able to relax, to allow himself to relax. I knew that he belonged to that section of the population that had been struggling for many thousand years. He was discriminated against. He had suffered so much, his ancestors and himself and his children. So the tendency to struggle has been there for many thousand years. That is why it was very difficult for him to allow himself to rest.

We have to practice in order to be able to transform this habit in us. The habit of struggle has become a powerful source of energy that is shaping our behavior, our actions and our reactions.

When an animal in the jungle is wounded, it knows how to find a quiet place, lie down and do nothing. The animal knows that is the only way to get healed-to lay down and just rest, not thinking of anything, including hunting and eating. Not eating is a very wonderful way of allowing your body to rest. We are so concerned about how to get nutrition that we are afraid of resting, of allowing our body to rest and to fast. The animal knows that it does not need to eat. What it needs is to rest, to do nothing, and that is why its health is restored.

In our consciousness there are wounds also, lots of pains. Our consciousness also needs to rest in order to restore itself. Our consciousness is just like our body. Our body knows how to heal itself if we allow it the chance to do so. When we get a cut on our finger we don't have to do anything except to clean it and to allow it the time to heal, because our body knows how to heal itself. The same thing is true with our consciousness; our consciousness knows how to heal itself if we know how to allow it to do so. But we don't allow it. We always try to do something. We worry so much about healing, which is why we do not get the healing we need. Only if we know how to allow them to rest can our body and our soul heal themselves.

But there is in us what we call the energy of restlessness. ((I think this is also important.. so balance/harmony to direct…)) We cannot be at peace with ourselves. We cannot be peaceful. We cannot sit; we cannot lie down. There is some energy in us to do this, to do that, to think of this, to think of that, and that kind of restlessness makes us unhappy. That is why it is so important for us to learn first of all to allow our body to rest. We have to learn how to deal with all our energy of restlessness. That is why we have to learn these techniques of allowing our body and our consciousness to rest.

I would like to offer you some instructions about walking meditation. The first thing we shall do early tomorrow morning is to practice walking together, which we call walking meditation. Walking meditation means to enjoy walking without any intention to arrive. We don't need to arrive anywhere. We just walk. We enjoy walking. That means walking is already stopping, and that needs some training. ((Be one with the task, be free))

Usually in our daily life we walk because we want to go somewhere. Walking is only a means to an end, and that is why we do not enjoy every step we take. Walking meditation is different. Walking is only for walking. ((Living for living - as-it-is-ness. Means=end)) You enjoy every step you take. So this is a kind of revolution in walking. You allow yourself to enjoy every step you take.

The Zen master Ling Chi said that the miracle is not to walk on burning charcoal or in the thin air or on the water; the miracle is just to walk on earth. You breathe in. You become aware of the fact that you are alive. You are still alive and you are walking on this beautiful planet. That is already performing a miracle. The greatest of all miracles is to be alive. We have to awaken ourselves to the truth that we are here, alive. We are here making steps on this beautiful planet. This is already performing a miracle. ((Touching the miracle..))

But we have to be here in order for the miracle to be possible. We have to bring ourselves back to the here and the now. Therefore each step we take becomes a miracle. If you are able to walk like that, each step will be very nourishing and healing. You walk as if you kiss the earth with your feet, as if you massage the earth with your feet. There is a lot of love in that practice of walking meditation.

The Buddha said that the past is gone and the future is not yet here. Let us not regret the past. Let us not worry about the future. Go back to the present moment and live deeply the present moment. Because the present moment is the only moment where you can touch life. Life is available only in the present moment. That is why walking meditation is to go back to the present moment, in order to be alive again and to touch life deeply in that moment. In order to be able to touch the earth with our feet and enjoy walking, we have to establish ourselves firmly in the present moment, in the here and the now.

In walking meditation, we walk like a free person. This is not political freedom. This is freedom from afflictions, from sorrow, from fear. Unless you are free you cannot enjoy walking. I would like to propose to you a short poem that you might like to use for walking meditation:

I have arrived. I am home.

In the here. In the now.

I am solid. I am free.

In the ultimate I dwell.

You might like to take two steps and breathe in and say, I have arrived, I have arrived. And when you breathe out, you take another two steps and say silently, I am home, I am home. Our true home is really in the here and in the now. Because only in the here and the now can we touch life. As the Buddha said, life is available only in the here and the now, so going back to the present moment is going home. That is why you take one step or two steps and you awaken to the fact that you have arrived. You have arrived in the present moment.

If you are able to arrive, then you will stop running-running within and running without. There is a belief in us that happiness cannot be possible in the here and the now. We have to go somewhere. We have to go to the future in order to be able to really be happy.

That kind of thinking has been there for a long time. Maybe that feeling has been transmitted to us from our ancestors and our parents. That is why we have to wake up to the presence of that habit energy in us and to do the reverse. The Buddha said that it is possible for us to be peaceful and happy in the present moment. That is the teaching of trista dharma sadha vihara. It means living happily right in the present moment. When you are there, body and mind united, you have an opportunity to touch the conditions of your happiness. If you are able to touch these conditions of happiness that are already available in the here and the now, you can be happy right away. You don't have to run anywhere, especially into the future.

When we practice walking, we might be aware that we have strong feet. Our feet are strong enough for us to enjoy running and walking. That is one condition for happiness that is available. When I breathe in and I become aware of my eyes, I encounter another condition for my happiness. Breathing in, I am aware of my eyes. Breathing out, I smile to my eyes. This is an exercise, a very simple exercise to help you realize that you have eyes which are still in good condition. You need only to open your eyes to see the blue sky, the white cloud, the luxurious vegetation. You can see all kinds of forms and colors just because you have eyes still in good condition. Your eyes are another condition for your happiness. ((I am not sure if these are good examples and expressions…)) We have so many conditions like that for our happiness and yet we are still unhappy. We still want to run away from the present moment, hoping we'll find some happiness in the future. ((In other words, can you be happy even if you lost your eyes, etc???))

Breathing in, I'm aware of my heart. Breathing out, I smile to my heart. That is another exercise. When you practice like that you touch your heart with your mindfulness. If you continue a minute, you realize that you still have a heart that functions normally. It is wonderful to have a heart that still functions normally. There are people who don't have a heart like that and their deepest desire is to have a heart like you. So conditions for happiness may be more than enough for us to be happy, but we are not able to be happy because of that tendency to run away from the present moment. ((Appreciating what we have… appreciate to sense miracle… these may be the point…))

To take an in-breath, to smile, and to touch the conditions of happiness that are available, is something that all of us can do. Because of that we can stop and establish ourselves in the present moment. That is the teaching of living happily in the present moment. Please train yourself to make the present moment, the here and the now, into your true home. That is the only home that we have. That is the only place where we can touch life. Everything we are looking for must be found in the here and the now. In that way walking meditation can be a great pleasure and can be very healing.

Do you have to make any effort to practice walking meditation? I don't think so. It is like when you drink a glass of orange juice. Do you think that you have to make an effort in order to enjoy the orange juice? No. Walking is like that. To really enjoy a glass of orange juice, you have to be there one hundred per cent mind and body together. If you are there, mind and body firmly established in the present moment, then a glass of orange juice will become a real thing for you. You are real; therefore, the juice is real. And there life is real. Life exists. Life is deep during the time you drink your orange juice. ((Zenki - Dogen…))

When you contemplate a beautiful sunset, do you have to make any effort? I don't think so. You don't have to make any effort in order to enjoy a beautiful sunset. You need only to be there, to be there mind and body together. But if your body is there and your mind is in the past or in the future, then the beautiful sunset will not be there for you.

There is a kind of energy that helps you to be there body and mind together. That energy is called mindfulness. Mindfulness is the capacity of being there body and mind united. When you drink your orange juice, drink mindfully and you will enjoy your juice because you are really there one hundred per cent. If your body and mind are united when you contemplate the beautiful sunset, it means that you are mindful. Mindfulness helps you to be there in order for the beautiful sunset to be there too. While you walk, if you allow yourself to be there mind and body together, then walking will become mindful walking; it will be healing, refreshing and nourishing.

To meditate means first of all to be there, to be on your cushion, to be on your walking meditation path. Eating also is a meditation if you are really there, present one hundred per cent with your food. The essential is to be there. So please when you practice walking meditation, don't make any effort. Allow yourself to be like that pebble at rest. The pebble is resting at the bottom of the river and the pebble does not have to do anything. While you are walking, you are resting. While you are sitting, you are resting.

If you struggle during your sitting meditation or walking meditation, you are not doing it right. The Buddha said, "My practice is the practice of non-practice." That means a lot. Give up all struggle. Allow yourself to be, to rest. ((Same as Wu wei, - taoism))

I sit on my meditation cushion. I consider it to be something very pleasant. I don't struggle at all on my cushion. I allow myself to be, to rest. I don't make any effort and that is why I do not get any trouble while sitting. While sitting I do not struggle and that is why all my muscles are relaxed. If you struggle during your sitting meditation, you will very soon have pain in your shoulders and back and things like that. But if you allow yourself to be rested on your cushion you can sit very long, and each minute is light, refreshing, nourishing and healing.

It is not sitting in order to struggle to get enlightenment. No. Sitting first of all is for the pleasure of sitting. Walking first of all is for the pleasure of walking. And eating is for the pleasure of eating. And the art is to be there one hundred per cent.

When I was a novice I learned how to light a stick of incense in mindfulness. You see, when you light incense you think that the purpose of lighting incense is to have the incense pervading the Buddha's home. But lighting the incense is just for lighting the incense. You pick up a stick of incense mindfully and you enjoy that, because it is by itself an act of meditation. During the time you pick up the stick of incense you are mindful, you are concentrated, you are real, because your body and your mind are together. And the stick of incense is real. When you strike a match, you do the same thing. During the time you strike a match, you only strike a match. You don't do anything else. You don't think of other things. You are perfectly mindful of striking a match. You are concentrated on it, and you enjoy the act of lighting the incense.

When you hold a stick of incense, it is the same. When I stick it into the incense burner, I put my left hand on my right hand. That is the tradition. Everyone in the Buddhist tradition lights incense in that way. The stick of incense is very light; one hand is enough in order to hold it. Why do you have to put your left hand on your right hand? Because it means that you are doing it with one hundred per cent of your body and your mind.

Be there truly. Be there one hundred per cent of yourself. In every moment of your daily life. That is the essence of true Buddhist meditation. Each of us knows that we can do that, so let us train to live each moment of our daily life deeply. That is why I like to define mindfulness as the energy that helps us to be there one hundred per cent. The energy of your true presence. ((Samadhi…emphasized…so far))

Breathing in-in the here, in the here. Breathing out-in the now, in the now. Although these are different words they mean exactly the same thing. I have arrived in the here. I have arrived in the now. I am home in the here. I am home in the now.

When you practice like that, you practice stopping. Stopping is the basic Buddhist practice of meditation. You stop running. You stop struggling. You allow yourself to rest, to heal, to calm.

And after a few minutes of practice you might switch into doing the third line-I am solid, I am free. This is not auto-suggestion. Why? Because if you have succeeded in arriving in the here and in the now you are much freer. You are free from the past, from the future, from your worries, from your fear. And you become much more solid; your steps become more solid and you become more solid in your body and in your mind. Solidity becomes a reality after a few minutes of arriving, of being home.

Solidity and freedom are two characteristics of nirvana. Nirvana is not something abstract. The Buddha said we can touch nirvana with our own body. So while you practice walking meditation you can begin to touch nirvana already with your body and your spirit.

When you feel you are a little bit more solid, a little bit more free, then you begin to touch nirvana with your body and spirit. Solidity and freedom are the true base for your happiness and well being. No happiness, no well being, is possible without solidity and freedom.

The last line of the poem is wonderful. In the ultimate I dwell. In the ultimate. In the ultimate. I dwell. I dwell. The ultimate here is the true foundation of your being.

Let us visualize the waves on the ocean, several waves appearing on the surface of the ocean. Some waves are big, there are those that are small, and each wave seems to have its own life. A wave may have ideas like, "I am a wave. I am only a wave among many waves. I am smaller than the other wave. I am less beautiful. I last less than the other wave." Ideas like that. A wave can be caught in jealousy, in fear, in discrimination.

But if the wave is able to bend down and touch the water within herself, it will realize that while it is a wave, it is at the same time water.((Form is no other than emptiness.)) Water is the foundation of the wave. While waves can be high and low, more and less beautiful, the water is free from all these notions. That is why if we are able to touch the foundation of our being, we can release our fear and our suffering.

Touching the foundation of our being means touching nirvana. Our foundation is not subjected to birth and death, being and non-being. A wave can live the life of a wave, but a wave can do much better than that. While living the life of a wave, a wave can live a life of the water. The more our solidity and our freedom grows, the deeper we touch the ground of our own being. That is the door for emancipation, for the greatest relief. ((That is relief that has nothing to be relieved from… and to realize it is a relief…Or, it is a relief from self that is now found as illusionary.))

==
Stress and work

How do you maintain mindfulness in a busy work environment?

I am sure, at times it seems there is not even enough time to breathe mindfully.

This is not a personal problem only; this is a problem of the whole civilization. That is why we have to practice not only as individuals; we have to practice as a society. We have to make a revolution in the way we organize our society and our daily life, so we will be able to enjoy the work we do every day.

Meanwhile, we can incorporate a number of things that we have learned in this retreat in order to lessen our stress. When you drive around the city and come to a red light or a stop sign, you can just sit back and make use of these twenty or thirty seconds to relax-to breathe in, breathe out, and enjoy arriving in the present moment. There are many things like that we can do. Years ago friend of mind was in Montreal on the way to a retreat, and he noticed that the license plates said Je me souviens-"I remember." He did not know what they wanted to remember, but to me it means that I remember to breathe and to smile . So I told him: every time you see Je me souviens, you remember to breathe and smile and go back to the present moment. Many in the Montreal sangha have been practicing that for more than ten years.

I think we can enjoy the red light; we can also enjoy the stop sign. Every time we see it we profit: instead of being angry at the red light, of being burned by impatience, we just practice breathing in, breathing out, smiling. That helps a lot. And when you hear the telephone ringing you can consider it to be the sound of the mindfulness bell. You practice telephone meditation. Every time you hear the telephone ringing you stay exactly where you are . You breathe in and breathe out and enjoy your breathing. Listen, listen-this wonderful sound brings you back to your true home. Then when you hear the second ring you stand up and you go to the telephone with dignity . That means in the style of walking meditation . You know that you can afford to do that, because if the other person has something really important to tell you, she will not hang up before the third ring. That is what we call telephone meditation. We use the sound as the bell of mindfulness.
And waiting at the bus stop you might like to try mindful breathing, and waiting in line to go into a bank, you can always practice mindful breathing. Walking from one building to another building, why don't you use walking meditation, because that improves the quality of our life. That brings more peace and serenity, and the quality of the work we do will be improved just by that kind of practice. So it is possible to integrate the practice into our daily life. We just need a little bit of creative imagination to do so.

The Benefits of Silence

Could tell us about the benefits of silence and how we could bring that home with us from this retreat?

Many of us have realized in the last few days that silence can be enjoyable. We realize that there are many things that we do not have to say, and that then we can reserve the time and energy to do other things that can help us to look more deeply into ourselves and things around us.

If you are pushed by your habit energy to say something, don't say it. Instead, take a notebook and write it down. A day or two later, read what you wrote, and you might find out that it would have been an awful thing to say. So slowly you become master of yourself, and you know what to say and what not to say.

I remember one time I proposed to a sister that she practice silence. She was an elder nun and she had a few negative seeds in her that prevented her from being happy. She was just a little bit too hard on the other sisters. I proposed to her that she was a very talented person, very skillful in many things, and she could make many people happy if only she knew how to be silent and to say only things that needed to be said.

I proposed to her that she use only three sentences for three months. She could repeat these three sentences as many times as she wanted and I told her that if she practiced that for a week, she would feel happiness right away. The first sentence was, "Dear sister, is there anything I can do to help you?" The second sentence was, "Did you like what I did to help you?" The third was, "Would you have any suggestion that I can do it better?" If she could say that, she would make many people happy and the happiness would go back to herself very quickly.

In the family we can practice silence. We can ask the other members of the family to agree that we will practice silence for three days or for a week. It is very beneficial. There will be a transformation after the period of practicing silence.

Letting Go of Suffering

Why do we cling to our suffering?

Many of us are not capable of releasing the past, of releasing the suffering of the past. We want to cling to our own suffering. But the Buddha said very clearly, do not cling to the past, the past is already gone. Do not wait for future, the future is not yet there. The wise people establish themselves in the present moment and they practice living deeply in the present moment. That is our practice. By living deeply in the present moment we can understand the past better and we can prepare for a better future.

One day I attended a war veterans' discussion, and my heart is still heavy. The condition of the war veterans-their heart, their mind, their body-do you think that they will ever be emotionally healed in this lifetime? I think if they practice with all their heart and they are determined to relieve the past, they will be healed.

We cling too much to the past; we have to face the future. We have to stand on the ground of the present moment. The war in Vietnam was just a war. There are many wars still going on and we continue to create victims of war and war veterans. The number of American soldiers who died in Vietnam was something like 55,000. Every year the number of people who die in car accidents in America is exactly that number, 55,000. So there is the equivalent number of dead people caused by alcoholism and unmindful driving. This is another war. The toll is as huge as the damage inflicted by war, and every time a person dies because of a car accident, it creates many war veterans in the children who lose their mother, the mothers who lose their son.

If we stick to our suffering we can never stand up for healing and prepare the future for our children and their children. I would say to the Vietnam war veteran, okay, you did kill five children. We know that. But here you are, alive in the present moment. Do you know that you have the power to save five children today? You don't have to go to Vietnam or southeast Asia. There are American children who are dying every day; they may need only one pill to be saved from their illness.

If you know how, every day you can save five children from dying. Why do you let yourself get caught in guilt and become paralyzed year after year? Why don't you make a bodhisattva vow to use your life to work for the safety of many children? Did you know that 40,000 children die in the world every day just because of the lack of food and nutrition? You are here; you can do something. Why do you let yourself get caught in the past? You can save children in the here and now. You can use your life in a very useful and intelligent way. You can very well transform that negative energy into a positive energy that empowers you and makes life meaningful.

Relationships

When I go home, I return to my husband who is a hunter. He goes into our beautiful woods to shoot birds. He brings them home to show our seven-year-old twins, who want to be like daddy. What can I do to stop him from this habit of killing?

If you do not know how to be patient, how to care, how to use loving speech, you cannot help other people to change. But if we have the energy of compassion and loving kindness in us, the people around us will be influenced by our way of being and living. Reproaching them, shouting at them, blaming them, can never help them. Only our love, our patience and our loving speech can help. And if we are in a situation where our own skillfulness, our own compassion, is not strong enough, we could need the support of our dharma brothers and sisters in order to do the job.

Media Saturation

In regard to television news and newspapers, how can we balance not taking in toxins with not closing our eyes to suffering?

Myself, I want to be informed about what is going on in the world. I want to be informed, but that does not mean that I have to listen to the news three times a day. I think there is some kind of vacuum in us we want to fill up; that is why we buy so many newspapers and magazines and why we view so much television. We do not need that much information. I think maybe five minutes daily is enough. Sometime we can survive several months without any news bulletins. And you have friends who can tell you what is important that has happened.

Space and Freedom

Can you please elaborate on what is space inside of us? Why is this good? I feel lonely sometimes. This feels like emptiness or space inside, but it does not feel good.

Space here does not mean loneliness. Space here means freedom because you are not busy inside-you don't have a lot of worries, fears, projects, things to think about. That is space. Space here is the basic condition for you to enjoy life. If you are preoccupied with so many things, you don't have that condition.

One day the Buddha was sitting in the wood with thirty or forty monks. They had an excellent lunch and they were enjoying the company of each other. There was a farmer passing by and the farmer was very unhappy. He asked the Buddha and the monks whether they had seen his cows passing by. The Buddha said they had not seen any cows passing by.

The farmer said, "Monks, I'm so unhappy. I have twelve cows and I don't know why they all ran away. I have also a few acres of a sesame seed plantation and the insects have eaten up everything. I suffer so much I think I am going to kill myself.

The Buddha said, "My friend, we have not seen any cows passing by here. You might like to look for them in the other direction."

So the farmer thanked him and ran away, and the Buddha turned to his monks and said, "My dear friends, you are the happiest people in the world. You don't have any cows to lose. If you have too many cows to take care of, you will be very busy.

"That is why, in order to be happy, you have to learn the art of cow releasing. You release the cows one by one. In the beginning you thought that those cows were essential to your happiness, and you tried to get more and more cows. But now you realize that cows are not really conditions for your happiness; they constitute an obstacle for your happiness. That is why you are determined to release your cows."

We have to ask what is really essential to our happiness. We believe that things are essential to our happiness, but we have to look again. Many of us have cows, many cows that prevent us from being happy. That is why we have to learn to release our cows. Also there are many cows inside, so many preoccupations! Many things to worry about, to be angry about, and there's no space at all inside.

How can you be happy in such a state of being? That is why to release the cows around us and to let go of these preoccupations inside is a very essential condition for happiness. That is the space we are talking about when we practice. I am space; within and out. I feel free. Freedom is the real foundation of happiness. Sometimes if you don't know how to love, love will deprive you of your freedom and deprive the person you love of her freedom. That is why space is so essential in relationship.

There is a beautiful poem praising the Buddha: "The Buddha is like the full moon/traveling in the vast sky of emptiness." Because of that freedom, the happiness of the Buddha cannot be measured by our mind.

Dharma, the reality of truth, is discovered by Buddha very long time ago. Still of its truth, it is always be from the time to time. He once asked his disciples not to merely accept it but rather to experience it directly, examine it and then gain the understanding by themselves. It is called 'ehipassiko'. It is well-known now as a free thinking, intellectually analysis before come to the conclusion. It is how we all observe the truth. We always come from different view but ended in the same Truth hence it should not be a fight even a war because of self truth.

Having practice in Dharma, I could understand that our only body bears the truth of universe. Thus we should observe inwardly. The reality that happiness and suffering in human life are dependent upon our own Karma (interpretation). They do not come from outside or from others. All our happiness and suffering are created by us, by our own mind. They come and go, and repeated again and again in a circle of life and death. We always create karma, either good or bad even neutral act and thus we always keep repeating the circle unfinished. But The Buddha taught us how to stop it, to gain the real happiness, a highest state of mind, a nirvana, either in this life or after this life. A nirvana/enlightment is as real as a universe.

Earth is created out of the persistent elements of ignorance in the stream of consciousness to preserve in its own being. Hence Human being is imparted the secret of restraint and the concept of balance in order to survive orderly and peacefully. During primitive time, it was all right to survive on the basic requisites like food, clothing and shelter.

Come to advance towards modernization living, we then became more occupied with ourselves. We were moved along by the trends of society, pursuing more and more unwanted things. As we became more knowledgeable from time to time, we hunger for development; at the end the whole system of planet is showing signs of degeneration. As for human race, man has become more suspicious in dealing with others, envious of others success and highly opinionated oblivious to his own thought and deeds. The trend of fashion and the high standards of living continue to condition and mould us to become more competitive, thinking that if we were to pause for a moment, we would be left behind. I do not blame at all the great achievements of mankind as long as it brings us good and happiness rather than depression and more sufferings. But this fear and excessive struggle for more pave the way for psychological problems. Never has civilizations become so chaotic as it never been so tiresome with all those sophisticated technology and bioscience.

As you know that a storm of economic crisis swept through Asia whereby everything is slowing down. Many have begun to wonder why. Some countries wake up rich in the morning but goes to bed poor at night, so soon. For one reason or another, we have gone a bit too fast by spending more than we earned in the process of becoming. It doesn't matter if it is the government policy or the individual's budget as it boils back to the same thing. During a period of uncertainty, we have to be courageous in order we abide to what is truthful; no matter how painful it is. Only then, unnecessary sufferings can be avoided. The most important element is to sustain the faith throughout the period of challenge when the truth is acknowledged without doubt. If we are unwilling to change with the changing times, then we will be in conflict. Therefore the first principle must be understood at all cost; that 'change' is not in the interest of the mechanism of our thinking. ((Change, surprise, unknown….gives problem to the linear thinker…))

One famous goes: "When a person is fed and happily sits in the sun, he behaves as a Saint. But as soon as some untoward incident occur, he behaves exactly like a stupid man." As a matter of fact, morality has no value for those who cherish materialism more than anything else does. This is I called ignorance. Any decision made in our undertakings must be accompanied by wisdom and common sense. Important issues are best lefts with considerations, which must be felt in the heart when thinking roams through the head. For this purpose, I wait and see my own reaction first. The way of the world is to act hastily with judgment based on discriminations rather than 'pause and scrutinize' when a sensory perception takes place. We must not forget that everything plays a role in this universe, be it on the positive or negative side (still there is no positive and negative as they're equally in term of form and nature).

Grief and despair are the negative side of human emotion. We sometimes react foolishly in a funny manner when something miserable happens. Illusions are much easier to accept than the bare facts of life when most of us are stagnant. If we see these phenomenon as a reflection of a deteriorating society, it is for the individual within himself to get things right and back to the way of Dharma. As Mali Bogoien puts it: "Where we used the word Dharma or word God or the Released Heart, it can not affect the Truth. It is just as it is, whatever we call it."

Love, Yen.

Daily Note I

From daily observation, the more "change" is understood the more doubt I more, whether the self exists. It is what practice all about. Finally, my doubts also disappear because I found and sure that so-called self is nothing but mind and matters. They come in the form of thinking, discrimination and attachment.

...how can any action be completely unselfish?
Well, they are only mind and matter, how can it be selfish?

12/01

I agree that to actually realize the meaning of Dhamma, we just have to be truly mindful. In practical, I do Vipassana, briefly I call simply keep awareness and equanimity. Those suttas are what Buddha gave to his disciples in the conditioned times and places, thus not all of them is suit for us. If we understand, we will understand truly and wholely. Like looking a thing from many directions, we will confuse with its many faces. But because it is only one, if we understand its subtlest nature, no matter from where we look at, we will see merely a truth.

I do observe sensation. Why sensation?

I realize sensations occur all the time throughout the body. Every time I do contact, physical or mental, it produces a sensation. In daily life, the conscious of me lacks the focus necessary to be aware of all but the most intense of sensations. Once I have sharpened my mind by practice meditation (especially breathing technique), I easily develop the faculty of awareness. I become capable of experiencing consciously the reality of every sensation within.

As I soon realize one basic fact: my sensations are constantly changing. Every moment, in every part of the body, a sensation (often more than one) arises and every of it is an indication of a change. Mentally, it even more rapidly, the mental processes change and are manifested in physical changes.

It explains Tilakhana perfectly. I know Tilakhana from many sources, but firstly the explanation is so blur and abstract.

One does not really get Dhamma
because he always read about it.
Just because of one verse of Dhamma, if one live with it in every daily life, he will gain the meaning of the whole.

As a verse is just a verse,
all that can do is remain certain thoughts, that were part of reality too.

Even it possible to words every life,
still it would not have the reality,
it only remain words.

When the mind is still,
everything seems so perfect and wonderful.
I do not even know any concepts,
no knowledges creep in and label it.
Stillness of mind is not a will,
but understanding of the way things are.

The Buddha examined the phenomenon of human being by examining his own nature. laying aside all preconceptions, he explored reality within and realized that every being is composited by 5 processes, four of them mental and one physical.

Well, let I briefly explain about our mind. As we can see from deep realization, first process, consciousness, is the receiving part of the mind, the act of undifferentiated awareness or so call cognition, which registers the occurence of any input/experience/data, etc. Then come perception, the act of recognition, identify whatever has been noted by the consciousness. From there, is a sensation, as soon as any input's received. as the input isn't evaluated the sensation remains neutral. but once a value is attached ((Creation of H-Value)), sensation becomes what we feel as pleasant and unpleasant. once sensation exist, action arises. If it's a pleasant, you start liking it, otherwise you start disliking it. ((Know yourself!))

06/02

We all know life can be hectic of we do not balance ourselves. It is important to be on the track of health, both body and mind. Here is some point of your considerations:

• Take some time out from your comfort zone to a place where simplicity is very much emphasized. ((e.g., samu))
• Sacrifice sometime to sit and do nothing. Watch the breath at the touching point of the nostril. If the breath is not obvious, just be aware of that very moment.
• Take a strong amidst a natural surrounding. Be silly enough to take a good look at the trees, flowers and feel the fragrance of nature. It feels good to be in touch with nature.
• Take more alkaline foods and are careful about those places that are lacking in oxygen.
• Watch how painful it is when one is bored. It is all right to have such a feeling but it would be wise not to occupy that state of mind with something else. Just see how long one can endure; honesty pays. You will see that the body become drowsy once it has nothing to do. This is because a body is accustomed to doing. That is imbalance and if you're serious, you will have to work out yourself. Nobody can force you to change if you don't make a first move!
• Do the cleaning in the house. Gardening as an alternative.

Once I've learned about living in the present, observing my own mind in each movement (it is undoubtedly a very popular zen teaching). I read two messages from sutta:

"You are your own master // You make your own future." Which I completely stunned when realized this very simple fact: our suffering and happiness are dependent upon our own interpretation. Nothing to do with Gods or anything else but merely depend on ourselves! Let's move on!

I have asked before if taking control of our actions wasn't a kind of suppression. No, it is not. If someone is angry and tries to hide his anger, to swallow it, it's wrong--it's a suppression. But by observing your anger, you'll find that automatically it passes away. You then become free from anger if u learn how to observe it. ((Yes, Yanavira!! What more is there? Yet, your words may not connect until we really understand what it means. So, again, we acquire this skill and practice this art of living, experientially.))

Mind is even more intimately connected with yourself than your body. Yet how little we know about this mind and how little we are able to really live with it, how often it refuses to do what we want and does what we don't want. Meanwhile, the Buddha has examined the mind and found that in broad, overall terms is consisted of 4 processes: consciousness, perception, sensation and reaction....

When I said "mind", many are not sure what I mean. You can't find the mind. In fact, it's everywhere, with every atom, wherever you feel anything, the mind is there, and the mind feels. By then the mind I do not mean by the brain, is not only in the head (as the West think. Well, it's a wrong notion). Rather mind is the whole body, the whole body contains the mind, and don't try to separate body and mind, both 2 elements are yourself. Observe with love and patience.

When the sun of observation shines, a great shift will soon develop, thus you can see everything very cleary. Your anger will disappear just after you realize and see it. Here you may train your mental that will give you the ability to observe yourself in daily life whenever to do so. What you mean by "free, spontaneous action" is really blind reaction which is always harmful. By learning to observe yourself, you will find that wherever a difficult situation arises in life, you can keep the balance of your mind. With the balance, you can choose freely how to act, which is always positive, beneficial for you and for all others.

((Quote this in plm-book. Here, the Sun is true nature/self/wisdom/x/God.. the question is the connection/cultivation process to develop and enhance connection, then apply it to express IT. Yanavira says so simply. I am to bring these message in a manner that may be communicated.. to me and to others. Can I be the bridge builder?))

((If this principle is there, there is accomplishment in the human world as well. We accomplish in human terms but do not think that is accomplishment. There is only absolute is-ness.))

Money is that all?

Many have exchanged monetary wealth for stress that is the price of the wonderful feeling of being rich. In the beginning for some lucky ones who can make it rich, they can fulfill most of their obligations without many obstacles. Once they have raised a certain 'status quo', problems begin. They will struggle at all cost to maintain this identity since that is what the struggle is all about. In the process, they become more stressful and their ways of dealing with through suppression is totally wrong for it is a temporary relief. It is more of an escape when it comes to the real thing.

How many of the rich prefer sitting meditations? How many of the elite like to hear the Truth? ((May I communicate this message… to us all??))

Not many I dare to say.

Many created a sort of unhappiness around. At the end many carried these unhappiness to their deathbeds. Is this worthwhile? What a pity!

It is a cold society, as cold as I perceived years ago. Nowadays people simply do not care.

It's so tragic that relationships i.e friendship and marriage are no longer based on human warmth and kindness, but on television and internet.

Perhaps we should see relationships in a different light.

After all, concern and care generate warm feelings more than anything else in the human sphere. ((I read this a year ago perhaps. Now, a year later, I almost choke….to re-read these words again.))

Every additional drop of occupation within the framework of the mind prevents you from peace. Just imagine years and years of piling up the mind with activites, how can it just go off into peace in an instance?

Well, however it is good to take a note of the breath every now and then revitalize yourself. Presence of the breath is the here and now. You also will feel more concentrated on your work. ((Breath, attention, bio-feedback, observe…response))

Relaxation comes in many forms. Seeping fruit juice, listening to soothing music and relaxing into an easy chair is just one example of many.

I am sure it must be a very wonderful mind experience: be surrounded by a hundred chattering minds and be both one and separate with them...

I call it observation. Observation in the strictest sense is without the knower during any given moment of time.

The knower usually comes after that in the form of knowledge and discrimination. In other words, the knower is a bundle of memories--in different dimensions.

Talking about meditation, it has became so popular with those who take spiritual matter or the quest for peace seriously. We bored feeding up with stress, noise and unhealthy life style that we need something like motherbase. It has been attractive concept for modern man, but many seem to be lured by the promises of magic or mystics of meditation without having real understanding of meditation (hah?) Nowadays, the various techniques and information available i.e. internet, which just make practitioner more confused than ever! In fact, most beginners are misguided. Unless we have the right view of meditation our faith may deteriorate.

Right, nobody can force us till we make a first move. I ask many people and most of them said the same thing what they're looking for in meditation. A peace. It is understandable, however in my experiences, it is what we have to drop first from our head before starting to meditate. Peace is not about getting high, is it? It isn't hypnotism. The essence is to harmonize, sort out imbalance & comprehend the truth. A way to rejuvenate system of body by bringing together our mind in awareness and equanimity.

It is a good start.

Always to sense the impermanence of everything; it is fear that creates an ideology. Do you know that the beginning of spiritual search due to this ideology?

Unfortunately we have forgotten that any search is a bondage, for search creates a target or an object. The desire to fulfill this target creates another illusory subject, which craves, expects and eventually ends up in frustation if fail.

Remember, the only fear we have to be aware of is the FEAR itself. The content of fear may be intense and gripping, so much that it overwhelmed us completely. But when we look beyond that content, what do we find? Pure energy, energy which, if we focus on it directly, will begins to reveal its own nature. Then instead of filling us with agitation, the energy of fear can actually lead us to a state of exhilaration, or intense concentration or love. ((Right direction of no human direction!!!))

every aim in nature has life span
as the beginning there is an the end
we just have to know where it end
we just should not to sustain
in order to pave a new start

Ignorance...
I thought happiness and sadness are reactive states of mind supported by various factors which are likened to the changing scenes on a cinema screen of film show. You agree, don't you? ((I like the way, Nyana conveys the point!!! Not so much from logic, but deeper. Like a fountain of wisdom.))

The clinging to this happiness when it ceased to be and the rejection of sadness even though it is a fact, play a deceptive role in ignorance. Really.

A theory is a theory, not a reality. All that a theory can do is remind me of certain thoughts that were part of my reality then. ((That is how theory was developed - after reflection of one's experience base. But we need to go back then and there to relate to. So, practice not theory but totality of what is.))

A statement or a 'fact' is an emphasis--one way of looking at something. At worst is a kind of myopia. A name is also just one way of seeing.

I can't make a statement about a reality without omitting many other aspects that are also true. Even if it were possible to say everything, still I would not have a reality; I would only have the words.

In fact, what I see changes even as I describe it.

It is so far, in unknown world which dimension is neglected; even if he wants to know, he will not get it. It is too far from the known; it is unconnected with the known. It is not something that can be developed, because in the side of development there is always a knowledge.

It is in a far space, in innumerable distance. But, O Evernow (another friend of club), the trees and that yellow flowers are so near, ever nearer that his own thinking. So live, with a perfect intensity and beauty that never fade. A man with his bicycle sing with his tired voice, back with empty milk from town. He really wants to talk, but when he passes, he looks doubt and then finally he goes away.

You see a scenery from a little hole ventilation. If you're an artist, almost at the time the scenery will remind you of a painting, say from middle century including the painter name. If you're a writer, almost at the time the scenery will inspire you of sentences of story or a poem in your mind. If you're a musical or you're professor... Perhaps you will not really know how to "look" at the scenery. The mind is too full of concepts and knowledge, ambitions and desires...

To see the scenery in a real meaning needs a humble nature of little child. To see the mountain in an evening, a distant Tuscan between mist, if you see as the first time you see, as you have not seen before, as a baby who just opened his eyes, free from anything...

The activity of see will be a very nature experience.