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A time comes in your life when you finally get it...when in the midst of
all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere
the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and
crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a
blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice,
you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin
to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.

You realize it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change
or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next
horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he or she is not Prince or
Princess Charming and you are not Cinderella or Cinderfella and in the
real world there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for
that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin
with you and in the process, a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and not everyone will
always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are...and that's
OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) You learn the
importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process, a
sense of new-found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop criticizing and blaming other people for the things they did to
you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can
really count on is the unexpected. You learn people don't always say
what they mean or mean what they say and not everyone will always be
there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand
on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process, a sense of
safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as
they are, and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties, and in
the process, a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around
you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been
ingrained into your psyche. You begin to sift through all the beliefs
you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how
much you should weigh, what you should wear, where you should shop, what
you should drive, how and where you should live, what you should do for
a living, who you should sleep with, who you should marry, what you
should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising
children or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. You
begin reassessing and redefining who and what you are and what you
really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing
and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or
should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process you
learn to trust your own knowing.

You learn it is truly in giving that we receive, that there is power and
glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life
merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix. You learn that
principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of
a by-gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon
which you must build a life. You learn you don't know everything, it's
not your job to save the world and you can't teach a pig to sing. You
learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance
of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn the only cross
to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at
the stake. Then, you learn about love, romantic love and familial love.
You learn how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and
when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings
onto a relationship. You learn you will not be, more beautiful, more
intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man or woman on
your arm or the child that bears your name.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you
would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and
outcomes. You learn just as people grow and change, so it is with
love...and you learn you don't have the right to demand love on your
terms...just to make you happy.

You learn that alone does not mean lonely...and you look in the mirror
and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 3 or a
perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your
head and agonizing over how you "stack up."

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing
things over and ignoring your needs. You learn feelings of entitlement
are perfectly OK...and that it is your right to want things and to ask
for the things that you want...and that sometimes it is necessary to
make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love,
kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won't settle for less. You
allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you to glorify you with
his or her touch...and in the process you internalize the meaning of
self-respect.

You learn your body really is your temple. You begin to care for it and
treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more
water and taking more time to exercise. You learn fatigue diminishes the
spirit and can create doubt and fear so you take more time to rest. And,
just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul, so you take more
time to laugh and to play.

You learn, that for the most part in life, you get what you believe you
deserve...and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn anything worth achieving is worth working for and wishing for
something to happen is different from working toward making it happen.
More importantly, you learn in order to achieve success you need
direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn no one can do it
all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron
of all time, FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your
fears because you know whatever happens you can handle it and to give in
to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. You learn
to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of
impending doom. You learn life isn't always fair, you don't always get
what you think you deserve and sometimes bad things happen to
unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to
personalize things. You learn no one is punishing you or failing to
answer your prayers. It is just life happening.

You learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego. You
learn negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be
understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and
poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are
wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple
things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the
earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a
soft warm bed, a long hot shower.

Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and to
make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever
settle for less than your heart's desire. You hang a wind chime outside
your window so you can listen to the wind and you make it a point to
keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful
possibility. Finally, with courage in your heart and with faith by your
side you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design
the life you want to live as best as you can.

- Author Unknown

THE AWAKENING