You live for the fight when that's all that you've got
-Bon Jovi

I was born a wolf. Yeah, one of a litter of six. I always felt different than the rest. See, both of my parents were wolves; one just happened to be kinfolk. That was my mother. She was the only kinfolk in our pack, and so I was the only one who actually gained the gene. My mother was the alpha female as she was easily the smartest of the pack. That came from being kinfolk. She knew a lot about the stars, maybe I have Stargazer blood in me, I don't know. But anyway, she always knew. She could sense it. She treated me differently than she treated the others. And she always looked at me differently too. There was a pride in her eyes, but always a certain degree of sorrow as well. I didn't understand then, but I do now. See, when I was born, Jupiter was in the process of setting. You probably don't know much about the planets yet, but four of them, at least, have a certain level of effect on a Garou should they be in the sky at the time of the birth of the Garou. Jupiter commands knowledge and luck. While it's descending, it gives Garou bad luck for life. Such is my curse, but oh well. My mother was careful to keep a close watch on me. She didn't want my bad luck taking my life before I went through my First Change. So that was basically my life for the first couple years. The others avoided me for the most part. Occasionally they would pick on me, but my mother was quick in running them off. She took wonderful care of me, and I miss her, but such is the circle of life, I suppose.

Anyway, then I hit two winters... or two and a half if you want to think in human terms. I was running out and about on my own hunting for food. I happened across this wonderful buck. He was strong, fast, a buck that no normal wolf would try for as it could easily get away and possibly hurt the wolf in the process. But I knew I had to try. What a way to prove myself to the pack. I started after the buck and shortly after the chase was on. The buck was fast, but I started to gain ground quickly after a bit. I wasn't paying so much attention to what I was actually doing as I was just focused on the buck. Oh, I've neglected telling you this for the story, but as you can see, I'm very short. I only stand 3'10" in homid form and 5'4" in Crinos form. So you could just imagine me in lupus form. I was basically considered a runt. Anyway, back to the chase. I was happily involved in the chase, not paying much attention to anything else. I figured it was the thrill and adrenalin that was driving me on so quickly. Was I wrong. I caught up to the buck and came down, yes down, on its throat, raking my claws into its sides. Shortly after it was dead I noticed that I wasn't a wolf anymore. I was in Crinos form, and was I confused. Shortly after as my adrenalin slipped away, I started to retake my natural form. I was still confused, but I let out a howl to call the others. They quickly came and were of course, extremely surprised to see short me standing next to this magnificent dead buck. My mother knew exactly what had happened and was thrilled. She tried her best to explain it to the others, but they started to grow extremely suspicious of me. They drew together and started to speak in low growls. I knew many of the words being spoken were not kind, and so I started to grow nervous. The more stressed and nervous I grew, the more I just wanted to get away. I thought they were going to kill me, and maybe they were coming to that decision. I'll never know. I took a few absent steps back and in doing so, disappeared into the Umbra. I felt very cold. It was like suddenly breaking through ice and falling into the freezing water below. I freaked out at first, I had no idea where I was. But then I slowly started to remember stories of the Umbra that my mother had told me. I started to calm down and explore my surroundings. Well as my luck would have it, the first creature I ran into was a corrupted Sasquatch. I quickly started to run, but the thing quickly closed on me, and right as it started to dear down on me, I remembered I could get out of the Umbra as well. So I managed to escape with my life, barely. I ended up with two enormous sets of claw marks down my back. I almost died from those alone. When I came out, the wolves of my pack were gone. Well all but my mother were. She urged me back to my Crinos form. I didn't know if I could gather the strength to do so, but I tried... and when I failed the first time, I tried again. It was my third try that I actually managed to get into my Crinos form. I must admit, I felt a hell of a lot better when I changed. I could feel all my energies starting to come back as I started to regenerate. I wasn't used to such things yet, so the bliss of feeling my injuries and the pain with them go away so quickly was wonderful. All that ended up remaining of the claw marks in my back were 6 long scars that show where they raked down. I'm really lucky I survived that attack. Well... maybe I was anyway. I have a hard time believing that I could have any luck at all.

After I had finished regenerating, my mother told me about what had happened with the wolf pack. Seems they had decided to leave me completely for the dead to go out on my own. Of course, they had taken the buck with them, and they had told my mother that she could wait for me to tell me and then decide if she wished to stay with the pack or go with me. I was very upset. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she wouldn't be going with me, and I've never liked being alone. Especially without her. She had been there for me for all my life and here she was saying that I had to go out on my own. I didn't know where I could go or anything, but she left me there and returned to the pack. I just stayed where I was for about a day. A great wave of depression hit me after she had left. I'd never been alone like this before. I did ended up retaking my lupus form, however, and after the day decided that I would go and see what there was waiting for me in the world. I wandered for about a year, realizing that I wasn't aging as quickly as I had been before the change. That happens to most after they change, they take on a lifespan longer than a human's even should they not die in battle. With battle involved, the lifespan of a Garou is still about 60-70 years, I think. Cut it down a little for the Lupus though as we start aging slower at about the equivalent to a human of 13 or 14 years old. So we lose about ten years in there. Anyway, I was Ronin. My mother didn't tell me where to go to find Garou or any of that... I guess she probably didn't know. I just followed the forests around for awhile and then finally, I came to lay eyes on the first city I had ever seen. I tell you, I don't understand humans. They build these wonderful forests of steel and glass only to choke the air around the forest with pollution and trash. I must admit that it makes the city look more like a forest, but a black one. I much prefer the greens of the forest that Gaia has us protecting. Well I went to the city, deciding that maybe, just maybe I could find what I was looking for there. I had a hard time at first. I had never had to deal with air pollution such as that of Chicago before. I had a very hard time breathing at first, though after awhile it did get easier. I guess I got used to it in a sick sort of way. I continued to travel through the streets, looking for any sign at all that might mean something important. It's rather hard when you don't even know what it is you're looking for. I avoided the humans as best as I could. Most of them thought I was just a stray dog anyway. I tell you, that... is insulting. But I suppose it doesn't matter much now.

It wasn't me that found the sign... but the sign found me. I had been in the city about six months when, as I was getting ready to go to sleep, I was approached by a very large and husky type fellow. He ended up catching me by the back of the neck, startling me. I tried my hardest to get away, but couldn't get my head turned enough to bite his hand or wrist. That didn't keep me from trying though. The guy just kind of laughed and carried me off. He took me to the sept where I was introduced to the other Get of Fenris in the city. The man ended up being the leader of the Get there and said that he was going to send me with some others through the Rite of Passage as I had already gone through my First Change. He then introduced me to the others who would be going... my future pack. This is when I met Frigaia. You could just tell by the look on her face that she was a no nonsense woman. The other one who I was going to be running with at that time was Vidar. They were the only ones that were going at the same time as me, so our pack ended up pretty small. I was quickly taught the basics, though my tendency to step sideways without even thinking about it had saved them the trouble of teaching me exactly how to go through the Gauntlet. The Get then sent us off. Our goal was really a fairly simple one. We had to destroy a few Fomori and the young Black Spiral Dancer that was going to become their leader. We were a tough group. I may be small, but that doesn't mean I'm not strong. You'd be amazed at the strength that rests behind these seemingly slender muscles. Frigaia's bigger though, much bigger muscle wise. Though she's not much stronger than I am. She ended up going in first and leading us through. I suppose she was just meant to be the leader. Well as we were going, a fire happened to start up in the house. Damn am I just lucky to have around or what? Well the fire ended up splitting us apart. Frigaia ended up with Vidar and I ended up alone. We had to carry through with our rite, however, and so I pressed on as I know the others did. I ended up finding two of the Fomori and the Black Spiral Dancer. I got to surprise them and ended up quickly taking down one of the Fomori... the youngest one. That was one down. After that, it was a bloody as hell fight. The two remaining quickly closed on me. I don't look like much, so they decided that they could deal with me easily enough, I suppose. I ended up taking out the other Fomori first, leaving only me and the Black Spiral Dancer. Right as I was going to finish him off as well, one of the rafters of the building above me gave way to the fire and hit me square in the back. It's a good thing I was in Crinos form and over the time I had learned a gift... resist pain. It was a gift granted to me through my Auspice. Very helpful at times like this. So despite the fact my back was very badly bruised with the possibility of a broken rib or two, I still got the chance to tear that Dancer to shreds. Well right as I was finishing with him, the house was starting to collapse. I truly thought I was dead as I watched the roof start to cave in on me. I just had the "deer in the headlights" paralyzing fear going through me. It was then that I felt a force hit me square in the chest. As it hit me, I went into the Umbra and there I was safe as the building wasn't old enough to even have a presence in the Umbra. At first I didn't know what had happened, all I knew was that there was a great weight on my chest and stomach and I was on my back rather than my feet. Well my first reaction out of pure instinct wasn't kind... sorry Vidar. I ended up sending my claws right into his side and giving him a few rather nasty gashes up his side. It got him off and then I realized what I had just done. I wasn't happy about it. I mean he had just saved my life and I claw him. He ended up getting a battle scar from the hit even. I hit him rather hard. Whoops. Well I regenerated fairly quickly from my injuries of the battle. Frigaia was there as well and after we had gathered ourselves together... and I had apologized to Vidar several times... we started back. When we got back, we were rewarded by being accepted into the Get of Fenris. Frigaia decided that we would be called the Rage of Fenrir and take Fenris as our pack totem. So we went out to seek his acceptance to being our totem. It really wasn't very hard. He liked Frigaia quite a bit. She's Ahroun after all, as is Vidar. I'm only a Philodox, but I can hold my own in a fight. With his alliance, we all grew a bit stronger, which was pretty cool. We were born for the fight and the fight we picked up.

Well we decided that we'd set out and find battles to fight to help destroy the Wyrm. We went through a hell of a lot of fights. Also as we went along, Frigaia was quick to accept in other Ahrouns to let them in on the pack to benefit from the totem and help in the fight. We gathered a bunch of people this way over the years and so here you have the Rage of Fenrir. It was about six years ago that I got my hand burned as badly as you see it now. It's not very useful anymore. I can hold things with it, but not tightly. It's very painful still to do so as well. Fire and me just don't get along for the most part, I suppose. Anyway, Vidar and I were running through another house that we had been exploring when a fire started up from a bad wire in the house somewhere. I don't know where. Anyway, the fire quickly rose and right as it was reaching where I was, I heard Vidar yelp out in another room. Well I couldn't leave him there and I ended up running off to find him where he ended up getting caught in the flames as he had been standing on a weak floor that had quickly given through. The fire was between me and him and I ended up having to reach through the fire to get a hold of Vidar and yank him into the Umbra from there. So we ended up saving each other once from fire. I don't mind the fact that my hand burned up. I have always been a little closer to Vidar than I have been to Frigaia anyway.

Well it was a couple years after that that shit really started to get weird. Now I'm not insulting my alpha or anything, no, but she can get really weird sometimes. I just... love trying to get my way through some of the moots we've had about her actions. Anyway, she started to delve a bit into the darker arts. She was studying the Wyrm. I found a few books myself in her room from when she started. Now granted, it's usually not bad to learn the way of your enemies, but the Wyrm is the Wyrm. Though I can perfectly understand her point of view. She was so fanatical about destroying the Wyrm, she would go to any length to do it. I'm really glad none of us have become abominations. I know we wouldn't be spared... but then most of us wouldn't want to be... at least not before we became abominations. Afterwards, who am I to say. We can always be brave about death before an action takes place... it's afterwards when you're actually faced with death that the decision becomes a hard one. Anyway, she started to tell us that to best beat the Wyrm, we had to learn the Wyrm and understand the Wyrm... in the process, I guess... we almost became the Wyrm. Not that I'm saying that's how it really is. Don't tell Frigaia I actually said that. But we all ended up with this taint of corruption. According to the gift that allows a Garou to sense Wyrm among a group of people... we are Wyrm. Frigaia has always told us that this doesn't matter and that we are still true Garou as long as we are combating the Wyrm. During this time we had ended up near New Orleans where we still are. Well Frigaia's attention was quickly turned to the Bone Gnawers. I really don't know what sparked her hatred toward them... but she has always seen them as Wyrm for as long as I could remember. We ended up picking up this fight against the Bone Gnawers and against them we would conduct many of our battles though we would also fight all sorts of other types of Wyrm as well. Don't get us wrong. We hate the Wyrm as much as anyone. Frigaia just happens to take some wrong turns when it comes to trying to deal with it. But she's my alpha and it's my duty to follow her and help her in her quest.

About seven or so months ago now, she really got this weird idea. She had just managed to get ahold of a brand new gift that was taught to her by an avatar of Fenrir himself. We ended up getting involved in a large fight. The Bone Gnawers and the Rage had ended up with a great hatred for each other and I must say that both sides started the fight that resulted in this... The Rage did not set out to hunt the Gnawers and neither did the Gnawers set out to hunt down the Rage. Instead we ended up stumbling across each other... Well the Gnawers happened to have quite a bit of back up this time around. They easily outnumbered us 3 to 1 at least. There were a hell of a lot of Bone Gnawers in New Orleans. Well as the fighting got underway, Frigaia ended up calling in her new gift. There was this sudden rush with a very loud roar. I was just about knocked off my feet and then I saw the avatar. It was amazing... just damn amazing. This wolf was taller at the shoulder than most Garou in Crinos form. It tore through the Gnawers like nothing else and ran them down with speed that I thought was damn near impossible. The fight was over shortly after that and the Avatar took its leave, leaving a lot of dead bodies behind. Frigaia was huddled over in pain but with a triumphant smirk on her face. She was holding her right wrist close to her chest and shortly after that I noticed that her right hand was completely gone... bitten off by the avatar. It was all just so damn awe-inspiring that I was struck speechless. All the bodies... and Frigaia with that smile. Well I'll just leave it at that.

Just a few weeks or so ago, we ended up being approached and asked to join a side against the Gnawers in order to help them and that they would help us. Well Frigaia wasn't one to turn that down. The extra protection was nice for the short time it lasted. I tell you it was so damned embarrassing to find out in front of all the main packs of New Orleans that the side we were working on was the side that has the returned Eater-of-Souls on it. Frigaia ended up leaving it after I told her.. thank Gaia.. That leaves me about where we are now. I'm still not doing well with stressful situations and I probably never will. I've ended up in far too many fights because of it. It irritates Frigaia, but there's not much she or I can do about it and she recognizes that. I suppose that's it then. Not much of a story, but a story nonetheless.

Good judgement comes from experience; and experience, well, that comes from bad judgement.
-Anon

When we are young we generally estimate an opinion by the size of the person that holds it, but later we find that is an uncertain rule, for we realize that there are times when a hornet's opinion disturbs us more than an emperor's.
-Mark Twain