Need
By Coral

Rating: *NC-17*
Disclaimer: Star Trek belongs to Paramount, and so on, and all that stuff...
Dedication: My three beta readers; Abby, Jade, and someone else who must remain nameless at time of writing. Oh, and Charon & Rel want me to dedicate to newlyweds Desmond & Becci too...

(Minor Unimatrix Zero spoilers, maybe)

She came to me at night, a haunted look in her eyes.  Her fiery red hair in striking contrast to her creamy white skin, she stood before me like a goddess in her loose shift dress. Her scent - an odd aroma of coffee and roses that was strange, yet somehow arousing - seemed to envelop me as I stepped closer, cupping her face in my hand.
"Help me feel human again," was all she said before pulling me into a warm kiss. The gesture alone was enough to arouse me; it took me a while to hear the warning bells, by which time I'd already started returning the kiss. But when I felt delicate fingers caress the small of my back, then work their way downwards, I came to my senses with a start.
"No, Kathryn. I won't let you do this," I protested, pushing her off me; a move that required every last drop of my self-control. For years I'd dreamt of Kathryn coming to me willingly - but was she willing now? Forcing myself to look at her squarely I could see, in my mind's eye, the drone she had been; the perversion of Kathryn Janeway violated by the
Collective. Her appearance here, her haunted look, her desperate plea - all due to that trauma? If she awoke regretting this...
"Please."
The simple word, falling from those lips I dreamt of kissing... It would be so easy to take her in my arms and have her now, damn the consequences...
"No." My voice was harsh, rough, and I turned away from her, unable to think straight when I was looking at her.
"Chakotay... I need you..." She placed a hand on my arm, no doubt aware that I wouldn't be able to resist the physical contact.  
And, damn it, I couldn't. I pressed my lips to hers gently, savouring every moment, because I didn't know when I'd get another chance. Not 'I love you', but 'I need you'... I loved her, I wanted her, I needed her...
It was enough.
She ran a hand under my shirt and this time, I didn't protest. Kissing her deeply, I started my own exploring, running my hands over her breasts, her shoulders, her back; every inch, as if determined to prove that this was really Kathryn Janeway, and not some fleeting night vision.  She was real, all right... her body responded to my touch; her nipples hardening, her gentle breathing growing deeper and harder. Even as my reeling senses were struggling to take this all in, she was divesting me of my shirt, and my fumbling fingers were helping... or maybe hindering, as I couldn't keep them off her. Within seconds, they were helping her out of her dress, then slipping off her panties as she laid hot kisses down my bare chest, creating trails of fire. I was harder than I could ever remember being inside the tight pants I'd chosen to wear; intense foreplay hadn't exactly been on my to do list for the night. Her naked body pressing against mine didn't help - silky red hair and velvety white skin; perfection personified. Then her hands were tugging impatiently at my pants, and only one question remained:
"The bedroom, or here?"
"Here," she gasped, pulling me down to the floor, bodies entwined. She seemed so delicate lying beneath me that I felt as though one wrong move might crush her. Stealing another quick kiss, I entered her gently. She was clearly as aroused as I was, her tight red curls damp around the edges. I moved slowly at first, but it soon became clear that the soft moans escaping her lips were of pleasure, nothing else. Taking my time, I kissed her again, taking every moment I could to savour her and love her, afraid I might never have this chance again. I moved slowly, feeling her excitement building, yet always trusting her to say or do something if she felt uncomfortable or changed her mind. I had no intention of taking her against her will; I loved her too much to inflict that nightmare on her.
But she didn't protest. Her every movement seemed instead to beg me to go faster, but I resisted as much as possible; we'd waited this long, a few more moments wouldn't hurt. I felt as if we were in some blissful union; our breathing coming at the same time, communicating without the need for words.
I came inside her at the same time she did, crying my name as she did so. I moved off her gently, brushing the red hair that captivated me so out of her face.
Tears were coursing down her soft cheeks from her closed eyes. Unable to resist, I kissed them softly, kissing every last tear away.
At last, her eyes opened.  
"Chakotay," she murmured. My heart nearly stopped as the realisation of what we had just done dawned on me. Would she pull back now, leaving me with this one taste of heaven I could never experience again...?  I was so caught up in my worries that I nearly missed her next words.
"I love you."

~End~