First comes my esteemed collegue, Howard Primer, who is convinced that indoor soccer is a life-sized version of foosball. He thinks that the whole experience of going to a game is a sham.
He's not the only one, either. My editor, Gerald Bentley, is totaslly against the concept as well. Of course, he doesn't believe that hockey is a real sport, either.
Which leaves me as the lone supporter of our beloved Crunch. I don't see what the big problem is with them. These people are athletes, too.
What I bring to the students of CSU is a defense of the Crunch, as well as all of indoor soccer, and a response to all the nay-sayers in my little part of the paper.
Why should we all be concerned with the Crunch, you ask? It's very simple: These guys win. Until the Indians took the American League pennant last year, they were the winningest Cleveland team.
The best part about the Crunch is they play at CSU's Convocation Center, just a couple blocks from where all of us take classes.
The tickets aren't that expensive, either. You won't spend more than 20 bucks to get really good seats and see all of the action.
This is all starting to sound like a commercial, isn't it? Time for some more facts.
Over the past five years, the Crunch have had the winningest record of all Cleveland teams. It's better than the Cavs and the Indians, I may add. They also are perennial division champions, and won the National Professional Soccer League title in 1994.
Why do I mention the past? Because they are on the verge of doing it again this year.
They have already won two games of their championship semi-finals against the Baltimore Spirit, the same team that was in town when Primer got his own pass and was so disgruntled that he left before the game ended.
So what if you've never heard of Zoran Karic or Hector Marinaro? And so what if their uniforms look like they came out of Little League with their big Revco corporate sponsorship on their shirts?
Apparently, some people thing that the Crunch is important. BP thought they were important enough to sponsor them for next season, as is Eveready, Flexall 454, and a whole slew of other sponsors that cover the walls of the arena.
John "Big Dawg" Thompson thinks they're pretty important, too. During the fight to keep the Browns, he was honored at a Crunch game, and kicked out the first ball. when Sports Illustrated asked him about the experience, he stated that "The Crunch did more for me in one night than the Browns did for me, ever." Pretty impressive.
Most of all, the countless season ticket holders think they're important. And those should be the people who should count the most. The Crunch understand that, and will be the reason they will be around for a long time.
It seems ridiculous that the Crunch would need to prove their own validity to the press. Indoor soccer really is a sport, folks. Like it or not, it's here to stay. At least be happy that we have another winning team around here.
Follow-up: The Crunch ended up winning the 1996 NPSL Championship. As for Howard Primer, his attack on Crunch soccer appeared again in 1997. This from a guy who does the Cauldron's pro wrestling column, which also appears on the Internet, in the Newsgroup rec.sports.pro-wrestling.
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