Where have you ditched me for, Mulder?
By Fiona Bland
fbland@golden.net
Character Disclaimers: Chris Carter owns Scully, Mulder and other
mentioned X-Files characters.
Song Disclaimers: "Whose Bed Have Your Boots Been Under?" was
written by Shania Twain and Mutt Lange
Classifications/Rating: a song parody, therefore H for humour.
rated G
Summary: Scully finds the perfect song to describe Mulder...
Notes: I came up with this after watching "Small Potatoes" and
"Elegy" today.
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Where have you ditched me for, Mulder?
Where have you ditched me for, Mulder?
And for what reason, I wonder?
This time was it loud like thunder, baby?
Where have you ditched me for, Mulder?
Don't look so lonely
Don't act so blue
I know I'm not the only
Partner you ran to
I know about Pheobe
Your little Oxford flame
I've seen you around with Marita
The bottle-blonde down the lane
Chorus:
Where have you ditched me for, Mulder?
And what did you steal, I wonder?
This time was it loud like thunder, baby?
And who did you run into?
And which agency have you been dissing?
And where are you calling me from now?
Do you know how long you've been missing?
Well, what have you been chasing after?
I heard you were sneakin'
When I was ill
With that vampire trio
In Beverly Hills
And I've seen you walkin'
With long legs (Det.) White
And you weren't just talkin'
With Bambi last night
(repeat chorus)
Get real Mulder...
So next time you're lonely
Don't call on me
Try the Gunmen
Maybe they'll be free
(repeat chorus)
I wanna know why
Whoa Foxy, tell me
What theory, yes I wanna know
You better start talkin'
Or you better start walkin'...
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The End
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Written: 6/16/97
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