1.Every spice girl has a "spice"nickname. If you were to become one, which of the following names would you chose ?????

Cellulite Spice ,Acne Spice ,MacDonalds Spice , Tame Spice , Comatose Spice , Flea-ridden Spice , Fatt Ass Spice , She-male Spice , Bulemic Spice , Sick Spice , Other (space below)
other:

a) A high pitched whining with a lisp which can drive a man insane.
b) A belching through the nose like sound.
c) A whiny sound contrived out off a hyena's laughter, the male zebra's mating call and a car which refuses to start noise
d) A stiff upperlip stutter which is normally only practiced by university professors trying to hide the fact that they are actually teaching you nothing.

3. Spice girls love publicity, what do you believe to be the most apropriate public behavior for a Spice girl ?

a) Making faces at a camera when you notice it is pointing in your general direction (regardless of it being operated or not).
b) Placing lose incoherent political remarks when in the presence of heads of state.
c) Urinating on the floor of the hotel your staying at.
d) Show your pierced tongue in the hope of shocking a non-fan.
e) Demand that all photographers leave before you go onto any stage.
f) All of the above.

4. Which of the following groups has had the most profound impact on your life?

a) The Monkees.
b) The Bee Gees
c)New Kids On The Block
d)Take that (the boygroup era has ended so... the girl group era begins)

5. What do you believe the words "Zigazig ah !!" mean?

a) We ran out of lyrics and had to think of something.
b) We know what we want to say but they'd ban our song from radio and tv if we did.
c) The melodic way to put throwing up noises into words
d) There were vife of us ....we couldn't agree on what we wanted.
e) Mary had a little lamb...............

6. Each Spice Girl has her own special characteristic trait. When it comes to showing individuality which is your speciality?

a) Go everywhere with a bare middriff regardless of it being a funerall or or even freezing cold. _{sorry taken}
b) Doing backflips whenever you can and wear a football shirt, without even the slightest hope of ever defending your countries honour on the Foot- ball pitch or at a gymnastics tournament. _{sorry taken}
c) To have pictures taken of you buck naked and dy your hear red. _{sorry not wanted}
d) To sleep around with your manager and still insist on giving yourself a nickname which suggest you don't even know what the word sex means. _{sorry taken}
e) To dress like a really hot babe, but not sing, dance or look like one. _{sorry taken}
f) To answer any questions thrown at you with vague, off color, double-sided 15 second sound bites._{sorry taken}
g) Other:

7. We really don't know what "zigazig ah!!" means we need someone who does for our group. What does "Zigazig ah!!" mean ?

a) "Mmmmmmmmmmbop dubop".
b) "Dowhadity dum dity do".
c) " "the wild thing" ".
d) "SUPERCALEFRAGELISTICALYSIMPLIALIDOCIUS".

8. Which is the greatest acheavement of "Girl Power".

a) Picking your nose in public.
b) Lying about your age.
c) Dumping your manager.
d) Calling yourself "scary" when all you really did was getting your tongue pierced.
e) Calling yourself "ginger" when all you have incommon with this root vegetable is the burning after sensation, but which someone gets about three days after having had sex with you and in a more private place of the body.
f) Insisting on calling your group the biggest thing since The Beatles, eventhough you are the product of a media hype and they did it all by themselfs.
g) All of the above.

9. If you were to become our 6th member what would be the first thing you would do ?

a) Blow my brains out with a 12 bore.
b) Emmigrate to Outer Mongolia where they have never heard about the Spice Girls.
c) Jump of the 600 ft cliffs at Beachy Head.
d) Have a sex operation, full facial plastic surgery and my butt liposucktioned.
e) Jump for joy.

10. We broke up because our last album didn't sell as many as we figured (just 250.000 instead of 1.400.000) what would you do to sell more records.

a) Donate my vocalcords to a worthy cause like the mute and deaf Society.
b) Strip ! sorry already had someone who would do that. It didn't work.
c) Tell people to buy our record or we'll have to perform it live !!!
d) Blame it on ginger spice, after all you joined after she left this disaster :)
e) Any of the above, depending on the weather, the lunar position, your hair do and the size of my inflateble ego.

11. What do you see in the following picture ???

a) A very crude representation of how we "danced" before we were tortured during TWO years into the slick routines we have now.
b) The dance which we'll be introducing in our next video clip.
c) A herd of wild buffalos running over the Great Plains.
d) This is what we see after our daily ration of coke _{not tm}

12. Our movie was c called Spice world.

Can you guess what other names we thought of before we decided on such a simpel name as "Spice World" ??

a) Spice Hell , A nightmare op Spice street.
b) Puke and barf and Spice , Spicetomania (the sickness wich can only be cured by poking ones eyes and ears out)
c) We couldn't think of a name our manager (whom we fired) came up with the name.

13. Which is worse,please tick one box in each catagorie.

a) Waking up thinking you are Mel B or, waking up knowing you are Mel B.
b) Waking up looking like Victoria or, waking up looking like Geri .
c) Knowing you are at the top of your career or, Not knowing you are at the top of your career.
d) Not having sex for over 3 years or, not having sex for over 3 years.

14. The final question. With this question we want to find out if you are really motivated. On a separate piece of paper write in your own words using atleast 100 but no more then 300 words, why you need to jump aboard our sinking ship. If you can not write your motivation letter with sentences of six words or less you need not aply. However if you can meet our criteria mail your aplication-letter to:

I wannabe a Spice Girl

55 Tosspot street Wankerville, England 65BJ SL2

GOOD LUCK ALL YOU SILLY PERSONS !!!!

If you actually meet the criteria we suggest you first visit...The Spice Girls official homepage by klicking here

#####The picture and lines below are double ???how the *** **ing ***** did that ****ing happen??? If you know the answer please don't tell me.
...I like it this way :it gives me a magical world to live in :)

AND NOW ON WITH THE SHOW !

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