"ADULT SEX QUIZ" Q: WHAT DOESN'T BELONG IN THIS LIST: MEAT, EGGS, WIFE, BLOWJOB A: BLOWJOB: YOU CAN BEAT YOUR MEAT, YOUR EGGS, AND THE WIFE, BUT YOU CAN'T BEAT A BLOWJOB Q: WHY DOES A PENIS HAVE A HOLE IN THE END? A: SO MEN CAN BE OPEN MINDED Q: WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR PAYCHECK AND YOU DICK? A: YOU DON'T HAVE TO BEG YOUR WIFE TO BLOW YOUR PAYCHECK Q: WHAT ARE THREE WORDS THAT CAN RUIN A MANS EGO? A: IS IT IN ? Q: HOW CAN YOU TELL WHEN AN AUTO MACHANIC JUST HAD SEX? A: ONE OF HIS FINGERS IS CLEAN

"ASSICONS" 1.)  ( _!_ ) A REGULAR ASS                                   8.)  ( _ zzz_ ) A TIRED ASS 2.)  ( __!__ ) A FAT ASS                                          9.)  ( _o^^o_ ) A WISE ASS 3.)  ( ! ) A TIGHT ASS                                            10.)  ( _E=mc2_ ) A SMART ASS 4.)  ( _*_ ) A SORE ASS                                         11.)  ( _?_ ) A DUMBASS 5.)  ( _o_ ) AN ASS THAT'S BEEN AROUND           6.)  ( _x_ ) KISS MY ASS 7.)  ( _X_ ) LEAVE MY ASS ALONE

OVER THE PAST FEW YEARS MORE MONEY HAS BEEN SPENT ON BREAT IMPLANTS, PENIS IMPLANTS, AND VIAGRA THAN PM ALZHEIMER'S.  IN A FEW YEARS WE WILL HAVE ALOT OF PEOPLE RUNNING AROUND WITH HUGE BREASTS AND LONG PENIS'S AND THEY WON'T  REMEMBER WHAT TO DO WITH THEM.

" NUSERY RHYMES" 1.)  OLD MOTHER HUBBARD WENT TO THE CUPBOARD, TO GET HER  OLD DOG A BONE.       WHEN SHE BENT OVER , ROVER TOOK OVER, AND GAVE HER A BONE OF HIS OWN. 2.)  HICKORY, DICKORY, DOCK, THIS BITCH WAS SUCKING MY COCK,  THE CLOCK STRUCK TWO. I DUMPED ME GOO AND DROPED HER AT THE END OF THE BLOCK. 3.)  GEORGIE PORGIE PUDDIN' AND PIE  SHOT OFF IN HIS GIRLFRIENDS EYE, WHEN THAT EYE DRIED SHUT, HE FUCKED THAT ONE EYED SLUT!

THERE ONCE WAS A NASTY OLD HO.  WHO OPENED UP A BAKERY STO.  YOU MIGHT NOT FIND IT FUNNY BUT SHE SAVED ALOT OF  MONEY.  BECAUSE SHE HAD HER OWN YEAST FOR THE DOUGH.                   (NASTY ASS)

"WORLD'S BIGGEST LIES" THE CHECK IS IN THE MAIL. > I WILL RESPECT YOU IN THE MORNING. > IT'S ONLY A COLD SORE. > DON'T WORRY, IT'S OK -- I'M STERILE

Q:                                                                A: Why is a waist called a waist?                         Because anything above the pussy and below the tits                                                                      is a 'waist'....

Would you rather....Stay single and be miserable with the *singles scene* ... OR ... Get married and wish you were dead.... All marriages are happy.... it's the living together afterwards that causes all the problems...... Daffynition-Honeymoon: The time between "I DO" and "YOU'D BETTER" If your wife parks the car don't sit there and insist she do it properly; walking the rest of the way to the curb is good exercise..... A husband stepped on one of those penny scales that tell you your fortune and weight, dropped in a coin.  "Listen to this," he said to his wife, showing her a small white card. "It says I'm entergetic, bright, resourceful, and a great lover."  "Yeah," his wife nodded, "And it has your weight wrong too." You don't know the pain of waiting in a slow checkout line until you've had a cashier with 2-inch long fake nails feebly attempting to change the roll of receipt paper.                                  Ok So Now On To The Next Page