The Sounds Page
    "No, now go away, we are racing for the title of the champion of the universe."   racing.wav

    "alt.nerd.obsessive"    nerd.wav

    "where I dispense the insults rather than absorb them."    insults.wav

    "Are you the creator of Hi & Lois, because you are making me laugh......."      hi&lois.wav

    "...No you may not...the bathroom is for paying customers only...."    bathroom.wav

    "Ah, a superb choice!"    superb.wav

    "Ohhh, so you're Bart Simpson eh? Well since my breakfast burrito...."    burrito.wav

    "Ohh pardon me Santos, if that IS your real name..."    santos.wav

    "... By day I am a mild mannered reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper..."    report.wav

    "....Melvin and the Squirrels, part of the rodent invasion of the early 60's..."    melvin.wav

    "Show me the 30 bucks, cause if you ain't got it, I ain't getting of this stool"    ain't.wav

    "...then you cannot have it..."        cannot.wav

    "...freak'n kids"        freakn.wav

    "no....way"    noway.wav

    "...but i'll let you have it for 100, because you remind me of me"        remind.wav

    "Yes sir!"        yessir.wav

    "Looks like you bought more than you bargained for.... hahahah...."         bargn4.wav

    "...I don't need this. I have a Masters Degree in folk law and mythology"         degree.wav

    "....if you put your gruby little hands behind your back and keep them there..."         gruby.wav

    "Your emotion is out of place here son"         outof.wav

    "...you made me get off my stool for that?"        stool.wav

    "....this, this is a Snaggle Puss, drawn by Hick Heisler, it is worth something...."        snaggle.wav

    "I will tell you in exactly seven minutes"        7mins.wav

    "Well I suppose you know then, Hollywood is planning a feature film about Radioactive Man"        film.wav

    "I can give you this telephone, it is shaped like Mary Worth"        maryw.wav

    "...then I would thankyou to stop peering at my screenplay... H o m e r...." Also very good!!!        scrnply.wav

    "I have got to do something about that airconditioner suction"        suction.wav

    "So you kids fancy yourselves experts hey?"        experts.wav

    "No groaning in my store!"        groan.wav

    "...because of it's frank depiction of sex and narcotic consumption, it is not for infantile intellects..."    fritz.wav

    "..Thank-you"        thank.wav

    "...oh oh please take my $59.00, I don't want it, it's yours..."         bones.wav

    "And one with extra cheese.....Thankyou"        cheese.wav

    "Oh our transaction is completed, you may take the boy"        boy.wav

    "That is a rare photo of Sean Connery signed by Roger Moore....."        moore.wav

    "...you may purchase this charming Hamburgler adventure...."        fries.wav

    " I am not at liberty to divulge the party..."        soul.wav

    "...it contain's a very rare Mary Worth, in which she has advised a friend to commit suicide..."        suicide.wav

    "If you are waiting for the Hi & Lois signing, it has been moved to the Springfield Colusseum"    sign.wav

    "But Aqua Man, you cannot marry a woman without gills..."        aquam.wav

    "And will there be anymore splurging today?"         splurge.wav

    "..Internet King, I wonder if he can provide faster nudity?"        nudity.wav

    "Ohh, lonelyness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix."         lonely.wav