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Introduction: I'd like to start this update by expressing my emotional side during the this last month. My NEED for bottom surgery has increased hardcore. I am a complete emotional wreck regarding my lower part. I don't want to wait for the money to pay for the surgery, i want it now. I am at the point where i would rather be dead then have to live like this. Live being mentally tormented by my intersexed bottom part. I can not stay stable anymore. I am packing EVERY time i go out...i've become like OCD on packing, how i did with binding before i had my top surgery. I have noticed a pattern...after i started T, i had to bind myself every SINGLE time i was going to come in contact with anyone other then my mother...after top surgery, i must pack every time i put on jeans or pants that are tight in the crotch (the way i like them) The need has gotten severe and my mind very unhealthy. I am starting to cry every time i cum or have sex again...its actually getting worse. As brutal as it sounds, i seriously do not want to live if i can not find a way to have bottom surgery asap. All this is KILLING me physcologically and i wonder how long it will be until the pain goes away... Welcome to the wonderful results of T: *Body Hair* It's comming! I am getting alot hairer on the back of my neck, back, chest (its growing over the incision lines as well), upper stomach, back of legs and butt. I am also noticing it growing beast-war style down from my armpit and connecting to my sides and also up from my armpit and unto my upper arm... *Facial Hair* Ive grown my chin hair out for a good month and a half or so. I trim it every so often. I am shaving the sides of my face/sideburns/jawline/neck every couple of days because it grows back fast but still uneven. My chin has appears darker but i still spruce it up with a little mascara for extra colour! *Acne* Acne is still hardcore. Its starting to travel down to my lower back and more around my scalp...I am still using Differen gel on it which keeps it semi under control. *Sweat* I am sweating more then i usually do. The sweat is leaving nasty ass marks in my white-tee shirts, you know the kind the scream to be bleached?! *Hairline* My hair line is definetly thinning as well as my hair. I am loosing hair on my pillows at night and when i style it, i get random hairs all over my hands... *Cock/Libido* I dont really pay attention to the growth, i do whatever i can to avoid this area. I am still that ''jumping jack rabbit'' kinko freako - horny enough to nut but so emotional enough afterwords to cry over it all... Extra: *Chest* The chest is healing slow. The surgery was April 17th 2002 so its been some time already. I stopped using Mederma cause my scars were ''spreading'' and i didnt like that. I had a stitch that was left over by accident removed at the start of this month. My nipples are still flat and healing. The color of my areolas/nipples is kinda tacky. Over all i am really happy with it and just a slow healer. *Voice* Email me for the recent voice clip and/or the whole set (11 total = pre T till now) *Pictures* Click here for my 10 months on T results photos |
| 10 Months on Testosterone Update For July 26th 2002 |