Disclaimer. Squaresoft owns all these guys and places. I don't mean to infringe you guys so........ just chill, …eh???

You have no idea how friggin hard it is to write each word of these last few chapters, so forgive me if my style slips only I'm dreading finishing this story
*** Is a move forward in time, in this case, several hours.
******** is the border of a set of song lyrics. I know that inserting a songfic chapter is probably gonna be a bit controversial (like everything else I've done ain't!), but read it, you might like it. It's................................ emotional.



The Longest Road.


"All this talk of getting old
It's getting me down my love
Like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown
This time I'm comin' down
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again
'Cause baby, Ooh, if heaven calls, I'm coming, too
Just like you said, you leave my life, I'm better off dead"

The Drugs Don't Work. By the Verve


Chapter twenty nine; Eternity.


He sighed, so unbelievably weary of the battles he had fought with his own mind and body. The tears pricked at his eyelids as he fought them with as much effort as he had ever employed in his battles with Seifer, if not more.

Zell groaned softly as he entered the room rubbing a stiff neck. "Hey baby, you...?" He paused as he caught sight of Squall's pained expression. "Oh god, you look terrible.... no offence baby!"

Squall managed to crack a smile. "None taken, I feel worse than that." The moonlight turned Zell's blonde hair to a white gold and made the tribal tattoo contrast ever more sharply against his skin as he fell to his knees at Squall's bedside. "I'm just so tired...."

"The answer to that is very simple. Go to sleep!"

With a gentle shake of his head, Squall whispered, "I can't."

Zell sat back and rolled his eyes. "It's easy. You close your eyes, you count chocobos you fall asleep!"

"I didn't mean it that way. I can't sleep because I'm afraid that if I do I may not wake up."

After several moments of silence, Zell plucked up his courage. "You can't mean that? Can you?"

"I can and I do Zell." He whispered as he winced. "And I feel so guilty for it."

"What? Why do you feel guilty?"

"Because I don't want to leave you...., especially like this." Squall reached out and touched his bare hand to Zell's already tear dampened cheek. The blonde leant into his lovers caress. "I feel that I'm letting you down. That all you have felt for me is for nothing."

"Squall! Don't talk like that. There is no way you could ever have let me down." The martial artist had a pleading look in his eyes.

He sighed. "I am letting you down..... Because I don't know how long I can keep fighting like this for you.... I only know it won't be very long."

Zell shook his head in disbelief.

"It's right! And I love you so much that it hurts twice as much just knowing that I'm going to leave you."

They were silent again for a while until Zell could hold back no longer. His head dropped forwards on to the thick quilt covering Squall's chest and sobbed loudly, unable to hold back his tears and sorrow any longer.

"I love you Zell." Squall's voice wavered with uncertainty, pain and regret. "I love you so much that it's always scared me.... I was afraid I might loose you. But in the end it's the other way around and I'm letting you down."

"SHUT UP!" Zell shouted, unable to take what he was hearing any more.

"I love you Zell." He repeated.

I know Squall. And I love you too, but I don't want to hear you talk like that."

"In whatever there is after this, this life, this consciousness, this existence.... I'll wait for you, even if it takes forever....." He half laughed. "I think I always did....."

"What do you mean?"

"I feel like I've loved you forever. In everything before this I mean. That we were meant to be together...."

Zell leant over and gently kissed his pale lips.

As he drew away again, Squall smiled at him before wincing as a violent tremor of pain racked his weakened body. "Shit....."He hissed.

"How much does it hurt?"

"What?"

"How much pain are you in Squall? Please?"

The lion's voice became very small, as though he were afraid of retribution as he spoke. "I haven't slept in three days. My lungs are half-filled with fluid and it's murder to take a full breath. Half my body weight has gone over the last month. My heart is being destroyed from the inside out.... I don't know how long I can last...."

Zell closed his eyes and drew up all his strength. "Squall.... If you want to, you should sleep."

"But...."

"But nothing baby! I don't want to see you suffer just for me and Ayden, no matter how hard I want you to stay, if you have to go, you have to go."

"Zell, I....."

"Sleep. I'll be watching over you."

His once bright storm cloud grey eyes had dulled recently, and below them were heavy dark circles. The paleness of his face was growing by the minute and in his veins, his blood was turning to poison. "Okay...."

Zell gave him a reassuring grin, even if his eyes didn't smile. "That's my baby." Zell clicked on the CD player on a low volume and a male voice began to sing.


********
"Close your eyes so you don't feel them,
They don't need to see you cry.
I can't promise, I will heal you,
But if you want to I will try....."
********


"Close your eyes Squall. I'll stay right here."

Squall nodded, his head barely moving enough to constitute a response.

Zell clasped his lovers hand in his own, and watched Squall's eyelids droop and close, with the slow rise and fall of his chest.




********
"I'll sing this summer serenade, the past is done we've been betrayed.
It's true.
Someone said the truth will out, I believe without a doubt,
In you.
You were there for summer dreaming, and you gave me what I need.
And I hope you'll find your freedom. For eternity....
For eternity."
********



Keeping one eye on Squall, Zell moved across the room to the door way, dashing to the kitchen to pick up a bottle of coke before running back in. Squall hadn't moved.
Zell stripped off his jacket and top and sat back on the bed.

Squall moaned softly and turned his head, lost somewhere in a dream or battle. The martial artist shook his head to fend off the tears.

********
"Yesterday when you were walking,
Talked about your mom, and dad.
What they did that made you happy,
What they did that made you sad.
We sat and watched the sun go down, picked a star before we lost,
the moon.
Youth is wasted on the young, before you know it's come and gone,
Too soon."
********



Beneath his hand, Squall's skin began to cool, just a little, so he barely noticed. Zell pulled the quilt up a little higher, a slight frown marring his features as he quietly hummed along to the track on the stereo.



********
"You were there for summer dreaming, and you gave me what I need,
And I hope you find your freedom, For eternity.....
For eternity.... For eternity........
I'll sing this summer serenade, the past is done we've been betrayed,
It's true.
Youth is wasted on the young, before you know it's come and gone,
Too soon."
********



The lion was growing weaker....

And all Zell could do was watch.



********
"You were there for summer dreaming, and you are a friend in deed,
And I hope you'll find our freedom, for eternity,
you were there for summer dreaming, and you are a friend in deed,
And I know you'll find your freedom,
Eventually...,
For eternity...,
For eternity....."
********



"Zell?" Squall mumbled, "change the CD please?"

"Sure." He replied, not daring to deny him or ask any questions. He picked up one of Squall's favourites, and chose a quiet track.

***

********
"Talk to me softly
There's something in your eyes
Don't hang your head in sorrow
And please don't cry
I know how you feel inside I've
I've been there before
Somethings changin' inside you
And don't you know
Don't you cry tonight
I still love you baby
Don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry tonight
Give me a whisper
And give me a sigh
Give me a kiss before you
tell me goodbye
Don't you take it so hard now
And please don't take it so bad
I'll still be thinkin' of you
And the times we had...baby
And don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry tonight
And please remember that I never lied
And please remember
how I felt inside now honey
You gotta make it your own way
But you'll be alright now sugar
You'll feel better tomorrow
Come the morning light now baby
And don't you cry tonight
An don't you cry tonight
An don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry
Don't you ever cry
Don't you cry tonight
Baby maybe someday
Don't you cry
Don't you ever cry
Don't you cry
Tonight."
********


***


Several hours later, Zell was awakened from his half-slumber by a cry. He sat back up immediately... Squall's face was twisted in pain.

"Squall!" Zell leant forward placing a hand on his chest. The lion groaned and stirred, awakening from whatever nightmare had troubled him.

"Hey..." He whispered.

"Hey." Zell gave him a quick grin and received a weak smile in return.

The heart beating in the lion's chest was as weak as a dying butterfly, it's beat so irregular that Zell did not believe it was keeping him alive. Tears welled up in the martial artist's eyes.

"Hey, you know what the song says..." Squall whispered. "Don't you cry, don't you ever cry, don't you cry tonight."

"I can't help it."

"Love you whatever babe......."


"You too baby." Zell's voice cracked.


Squall's eyes shimmered in the darkness, bright with pain and not fear..., but sorrow. His hand tightened around Zell's one last time as his head dropped to one side and he whispered "Zell..."

The last word he would ever speak.

With a tremulous sigh and gentle shudder Squall Leonhart, lion of Balamb Garden, lost his final battle. A tear had escaped and shone like a diamond on his cheek.


Zell reached out one trembling hand and wiped it away as he part whispered and part sang with his voice cracking: "Don't you cry, don't you ever cry, don't you cry tonight." He bit his lip. "Just like you said."



Squall Leonhart, as the first rays of winter sunshine had pierced the cold air, had died.








Author notes.


(Heavy Sigh.) God that was hard to write. PLEASE DON'T KILL ME. That was the hardest chapter I have ever written. The songs were:- Eternity by Robbie Williams and Don't Cry by Guns 'n' Roses. The beginning was Drugs Don't Work by The Verve.

See ya laters.


Drugs Don't Work

All this talk of getting old
It's getting me down my love
Like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown
This time I'm comin' down
And I hope you're thinking of me
As you lay down on your side
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again
But I know I'm on a losing streak
'Cause I passed down my old street
And if you wanna show, then just let me know
And I'll sing in your ear again
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again
'Cause baby, ooh, if heaven calls, I'm coming, too
Just like you said, you leave my life, I'm better off dead
All this talk of getting old
It's getting me down my love
Like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown
This time I'm comin' down
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again
'Cause baby, ooh, if heaven calls, I'm coming, too
Just like you said, you leave my life, I'm better off dead
But if you wanna show, just let me know
And I'll sing in your ear again
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse
But I know I'll see your face again
Yeah, I know I'll see your face again
Yeah, I know I'll see your face again
Yeah, I know I'll see your face again
Yeah, I know I'll see your face again
I'm never going down, I'm never coming down
No more, no more, no more, no more, no more
I'm never coming down, I'm never going down
No more, no more, no more, no more, no more


Eternity.

Close your eyes so you don't feel them,
They don't need to see you cry.
I can't promise, I will heal you,
But if you want to I will try.....
I'll sing this summer serenade, the past is done we've been betrayed.
It's true.
Someone said the truth will out, I believe without a doubt,
In you.
You were there for summer dreaming, and you gave me what I need.
And I hope you'll find your freedom. For eternity....
For eternity.
Yesterday when you were walking,
Talked about your mom, and dad.
What they did that made you happy,
What they did that made you sad.
We sat and watched the sun go down, picked a star before we lost,
the moon.
Youth is wasted on the young, before you know it's come and gone,
Too soon.
You were there for summer dreaming, and you gave me what I need,
And I hope you find your freedom, For eternity.....
For eternity.... For eternity........
I'll sing this summer serenade, the past is done we've been betrayed,
It's true.
Youth is wasted on the young, before you know it's come and gone,
Too soon.
You were there for summer dreaming, and you are a friend in deed,
And I hope you'll find our freedom, for eternity,
You were there for summer dreaming, and you are a friend in deed,
And I know you'll find your freedom,
Eventually...,
For eternity...,
For eternity.....


Don't Cry.

Guns 'n' Roses.

"Talk to me softly
There's something in your eyes
Don't hang your head in sorrow
And please don't cry
I know how you feel inside I've
I've been there before
Somethings changin' inside you
And don't you know
Don't you cry tonight
I still love you baby
Don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry tonight
Give me a whisper
And give me a sigh
Give me a kiss before you
tell me goodbye
Don't you take it so hard now
And please don't take it so bad
I'll still be thinkin' of you
And the times we had...baby
And don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry tonight
And please remember that I never lied
And please remember
how I felt inside now honey
You gotta make it your own way
But you'll be alright now sugar
You'll feel better tomorrow
Come the morning light now baby
And don't you cry tonight
An don't you cry tonight
An don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry
Don't you ever cry
Don't you cry tonight
Baby maybe someday
Don't you cry
Don't you ever cry
Don't you cry
Tonight."