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Copyright 2000

Welcome to the Forum!  (or Forums, since there are two).  Please take a moment to read the guidelines before entering.

First, read the descriptions below to find out which forum you belong in.  Second, go to the appropriate forum.  Third,  if your post has nothing to do with the thread you're posting it in, don't post it there.  Start your own thread.  Fifth, if you have a brilliant essay, don't waste it on the boards!  Submit it and you will have more readers and more space.  Sixth, if you're wondering what happened to fourth, you need to get out more.  Seventh, have fun!

THE GRAPEVINE -- Moderated by The Red Knight

If you are under 18, and/or easily offended, and/or politically correct, and are courteous and respectful of others, dislike negativity, are community-oriented, don't use foul language and/or don't like it when others do, and want to have a nice discussion or share the latest gossip, rumors, or interesting news and views, enter this forum.

THE PIT -- Not Moderated by fragments_of_sappho

If you are an adult, and you are loud and/or obnoxious, rowdy, grouchy, grumpy, moody, rude, crude, tatooed, filthy, dirty, stinking, sweating, bloating, belching, farting, vomiting, moshing, bleeding, oozing with pus, coughing up blood, screaming, yelling, ranting, raving, having a fit, having a panic attack, having a titty attack, stepping on toes, causing a scene, acting up, acting out, acting bizarre, looking for trouble, spoiling for a fight, having a bad hair day, on the rag, suffering from PMS, suffering from halitosis, bursting with testosterone, oozing with estrogen,  anti-abortion (or pretty much anti-anything), pro-choice (or pretty much pro-anything), sexually liberated, perverted, homosexual, weird, sarcastic, unseemly, disruptive, revolutionary, rebellious, psychotic, upset, paranoid, schizophrenic, homophobic, deranged, gun-toting, flag-burning, patriotic, intelligent, anarchic,  spontaneous, free-spirited, predatory, troubled, disturbed, disturbing, an outcast, open-minded, adventurous, brave, eccentric, a poet, an artist, an idealist, a realist, a radical,  a loose cannon, waging a personal war, crossing the lines, climbing the walls, storming the gates, rioting, looting, dropping acid, waking and baking, carousing, carrying a chip on your shoulder, a free bird, a coy dog, a vixen, a bitch, a wolf in sheep's clothing, a sheep in wolf's clothing, a black sheep,  a shepherd, a goatherd, a scapegoat, a goat god, unpredictable, contradictory, conscious, awake, dreaming, streaking, flaming, wild, out of control, out of bounds, out of sight, out of your mind, out of this world, in disguise, disgusted, apathetic, angry at life, philosophical, argumentative, pushing drugs, turning on, tuning in, dropping out, wearing sandals, barefoot, wearing a toga, not wearing anything, looking for sex, trolling the boards, proselytizing, pimping, prostituting yourself, standing on a soapbox, jumping on the bandwagon, falling off the wagon, marching to the beat of a different drummer, goosestepping,  starting a doomsday cult, forming a militia, masturbating,  having sex with an alien,  breaking the law, breaking a few commandments, butchering sacred cows, cloning sheep, cloning sheep in order to have your own harem of sexual slaves, concerned with things die verboten sind, opening a can of worms, opening a can o' whup-ass, getting medieval, going postal, unapproved, unconventional, unexplainable, unknown, unforgiven, unattractive, undressing, a peeping Tom, a pig, an exhibitionist, a voyeur, a Diva, a god/dess, a Godiva, in a godda da vida, a harlot, a heathen, a heretic, a blasphemer, an iconoclast, a Right-winger, a Left-winger, a eunuch, a unicorn, a cannibal, a Sethian, an Orwellian, a Lovecraftian, a megalomaniac, a benevolent dictator, a peaceful warrior, a time traveller, a hermeticist, a hermit, a crazy old coot, a cultist, an occultist, a housewife, a single mother, a deadbeat dad, a serial monogamist, a bigamist, a polygamist, a polygynist, a polyandrist, a polyamorist, a polytheist, a polyester suit, a string of poloponies, a nymphomaniac, a sadomasochist, a misogynist, a misandrist, a misanthrope, a misfit, a mindwarp, a mental patient, a moonbeam, a mad hatter, a march hare, a socialist, a singularity,  a terrorist, a pornographer, an alien, a half-human half-alien hybrid, a clone, one of several clones in a harem of sexual slaves, open to suggestion (be my sex slave), under hypnosis (sleep), under surveillance, in prison, an escaped convict, public enemy #1, on the FBI's ten most wanted list, not running for public office, running for public office in order to destroy the system from within, Art Bell, David Icke, Ralph Nader, Billy Graham, Patient Zero, Frankenstein, Dracula, Morpheus, Neo, Trinity,  Cartman,  Mumia, Leonard Peltier, Andy Kaufman, Satan, Beelzebub, Choronzon, Maya Angelou, Madonna, Al Sharpton, Elvis, Marilyn Monroe, Kurt Kobain, Tupac Shakur, Jim Morrison, the second gunman, Deep Throat, Jimmy Hoffa, Bigfoot, an M.I.B., an L.G.M., a Freemason, a Witch, a Fundamentalist, a Shaman, a Satanist, a member of the KKK, a Black Panther, a Moslem, a Christian, a Jew, a Buddhist, a Daoist, an atheist, a pantheist, a Pagan, a Mormon, a Scientologist, a subscriber to any religion, a Marxist, a sodomist, a Rastafarian, a Black Muslim, a Templar, a Rosicrucian, homeless, disabled, diseased, retarded,  thinking you might be a redneck, thinking the moon landing might have been faked, thinking  you might be going insane, thinking this list is never going to end, not thinking at all, a disembodied member of the Heaven's Gate cult, a romantic, a decadent, a reprobate, an anachronism, a vampire, a punk, a goth, a metalhead, a skinhead, a crackhead,  a dickhead, an airhead, a disembodied head that can answer yes and no questions, a homey, a hoodie, a honkey, a dude, a dudette, a member of the Breakfast Club, a fanatic, a trekkie, a trekker, a Mystie, a Xenite,  an X-phile, a generation X-er, a planet X-er, the X-men, a mulatto, an albino, a mosquito, my libido, a transvestite, a transexual, a transvestite from Transexual Transylvania,  bi-curious, bisexual, asexual,  a  lesbian, hotter than hell, not looking for a serious relationship (my e-mail address is, a porn star, a pop star, the paparrazzi, the Mafia, the Chinese Mafia, the Russian Mafia, a detachable penis, Dr. Kevorkian, Beavis and Butthead, Gonzo, Animal, Dr. Teeth, Sinead O'Connor, Ozzy Osbourne, Leif Edling, Darth Maul, Meatloaf,  Charlie Manson, Shirley Manson, Marilyn Manson, an insomniac, a neurotic, a spaz, a dork,  an asshole,  a fool, death taking a holiday, the Shadow,  Cheech, Chong, the Unknown Comic, Michael Moore, Jim Carrey, Anne Rice, Rodney King, the Bearded Lady, the Invisible Man, the G-spot, the Clitoris, one of the little people, a bozo, a dodo, a dildo, a hobo, over the rainbow, down the rabbit hole, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, not sure if I spelled that right, unable to stomach Mary Poppins, succumbing to the dark side, seeing the devil in everyone but yourself, stranded on a desert island, sucking someone's toes, getting your toes sucked, sucking your own toes, foaming at the mouth, shaking your gory locks, hearing voices, muttering to yourself, answering back, from an alternate universe, a cosmonaut, a space cadet, a shape-shifter, a doppelganger, a pariah, a pitbull, a piranha, a priori, a personality, a split personality, an individual, unusual, different, inspired, explosive, spontaneously combusting, a genius, a mad scientist, a Zooph, Lucy Lawless, Bruce Campbell, Kevin Sorbo, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Loreena McKennit, Leonard Nimoy, William Shatner, Lara Parker, Jonathan Frid, Kathryn Leigh Scott, Kate Mulgrew, Brent Spiner, Patrick Stewart, Stephen King,  James Earl Jones, May Gaskin, Starhawk, Majel Roddenberry, Ziggy Marley, Bob Dylan, Frodo, Miranda Richardson, Big Gay Al, Fartman, Karen Crisis, NORML, PETA, WADL, Greenpeace, the N.R.A., the I.R.A.,  NAMBLA, NOW,  AIM, the Underground, a renegade, a Hell's Angel, a rebel without a cause, a rebel with a cause, a vegetarian, a beefeater, one who practices autofellatio/autocunnilingus, one of a maligned or unpopular race (i.e., Black, White, Asian, Jewish, Hispanic, Reptilian), a Gnostic, an Agnostic, a stripper, a freak, a player, a ho, a ruffneck, a Blood, a Crip, the Anti-christ, Buzz Aldrin, John Glenn, Courtney Love, Shirley Maclaine, Rush Limbaugh, Howard Stern, Ross Perot, a High Priest/ess of anything, a Druid, a member of the Trenchcoat Mafia, L. Ron Hubbard, George Lucas, Houdini's shade, a Jehovah's Witness, a New Ager, a Darwinist, a Creationist, unwanted, unloved, misunderstood, a geek,  a free-thinker, an ancient alien, a Gorian, an alcoholic, Jerry Springer, the Loch Ness Monster, Joel Robinson,  Eddie Vedder, Rob Zombie, Flea, the Red Knight, me,  not F.B.I., not C.I.A., not the A.T.F.,  not the I.R.S. not the P.M.R.C., not Tipper Gore, not Bill Gates, not Uncle Sam, not Big Brother, not the Illuminati, not an agent of the Matrix, not a prude, not a sheep, not easily offended, not P.C., not opposed to freedom of speech, you may enter this forum. In short, we let anyone in.