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TALES FROM THE CRYPT PRESENTS:
BORDELLO OF BLOOD (1996) |
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MORGAN'S RATING |
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| The ghoulish Cryptkeeper returns to his chamber to host his second full length feature Tales From the Crypt flick about a funeral home that's a front for a whorehouse run by a gorgeous vampire. |
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| Jon Kassir (Voice of The Crypt Keeper), Dennis Miller (Rafe Guttman), Erika Eleniak (Katherine Verdoux), Angie Everhart (Lillith), Chris Sarandon (Reverend Current), Corey Feldman (Caleb Verdoux), Aubrey Morris (McCutcheon), Phil Fondacaro (Vincent Prather), William Sadler (The Mummy), Kiara Hunter (Tamara), Leslie Ann Phillips (Patrice), Juliet Reagh (Tallulah), Eli Gabay (Miguel), Matt Hill (Reggie), Eric Keenleyside (Noonan), Kim Kondrashoff (Jenkins), Robert Munic (Zeke), Gary Starr (Jed), Robin Douglas (Louise), Dorian Joe Blark (Jonas), Ravinder Toor (Bartender), Robert Rozen (Rabbi Goldman), Jennifer Jasey (Woman), Heather Hanson (Babe), Sibel Thrasher, Tom Pickett, Topaz Hasfal-Schou, Lovie Eli (Gospel Singers), Korrine St. Onge, Claire Marie Harvey, Lyne Hachey, Sheena Galloway, Kikka Gerguson, Melody Cherpaw (Bordello Vampires), Shelia Mills (Bride of Frankenstein), Natalie Ross, Angela Nesbitt-Dufort (Dancers), Gloria Roy, Maria Marhoffer-Bains (Waitresses), Danny Arroyo (Brad, scenes deleted), Whoopi Goldberg (Hospital Patient, uncredited), Tobias Mehler (Boy in Bordello, uncredited). |
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PRODUCTION INFORMATION |
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DIRECTOR: Gilbert Adler (Demon Knight).
WRITERS: Bob Gale, Robert Zemeckis, A L Katz and Gilbert Adler.
PRODUCER: Gilbert Adler.
ASSOCIATE PRODUCERS: Richard Mirisch and Scott Nimerfro.
CO-PRODUCERS: Alexander B. Collett and A L Katz.
EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Richard Donner, David Giler, Walter Hill, Joel Silver and Robert Zemeckis.
ORIGINAL MUSIC: Chris Boardman and Danny Elfman (theme).
DISTRIBUTOR: Universal Pictures. |
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QUOTES |
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| Lilith: Two! Four! Six! Eight! You can watch me masturbate. |
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| Lilith: Don't eat your heart out, baby--that's my job. |
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| Rafe: You're reminding me why being married to you drove me to the brink of homosexuality. |
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FACTS |
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RELEASE DATE: August 16th, 1996 (USA)
BOX OFFICE OPENING: $2.6 million (USA)
BOX OFFICE RESULT: $5.7 million (USA)
- In the cemetary, there is a crypt with the name "Gaines" on it. William Gaines is the creator of the "Tales from the Crypt" comic books.
- The key used in this movie is the same one used in Demon Knight (1995). |
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Rafe: I'm not going to tell you those aren't the Breasts of the Century, but I'm just not digging the owner, so why don't you put those away; you're just not my type. |
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Lillith: I just love a man who gives you head--and lets you keep it! |
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Rafe Guttman: I feel like I'm in a bad episode of Tales From the Crypt. |
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Tamara: Guess where you just landed, lover?
Rafe Guttman: Larry Flynt's id? |
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CRITICAL COMMENTS |
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[Katherine attempts to swing on a chain from one platform to another.]
Rafe: That is the craziest fuckin' thing I've...
[Rafe attempts to leave by sees the Vampire Caleb following close, and returns to Katherine]
Rafe: That is the second craziest fuckin' thing I've ... |
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| "Fitfully amusing juvenile horror comedy with a heavy T&A quotient." -- Leonard Maltin |
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| "It's all pretty silly and stupid." -- Richard Harrington, Washington Post |
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| "But this sickeningly puerile mess will be attractive only to teen boys who aren't too picky about special effects or scripts." -- USA Today |
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Rafe: I'd rather Crazy Glue my dick to the bullet train than fuck you. |
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| "Bordello of Blood is a macabre, jokey affair that could give Buffy the Vampire Slayer a run for its money as the silliest undead story of the decade." -- James Berardinelli |
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Zeke: Step outside!
Rafe: Sorry, Zeke -- I'm just not in the mood for a blowjob. |
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