Falling from the sky, I landed with an almighty crash on the streets of Melee Island. It felt good to be back, in some ways at least. That’s because nothing ever changed on the Island. People still crammed into the Scumm bar to catch the elusive happy hour… and that ugly store keeper that was seemingly obsessed with the sword master still hadn’t died.

“Aren’t you the guy that beat Carla?” inquired a filthy, stinking vagabond from the other side of the road. “You’re Guybrush Champion, aren’t you? Oh man, I’ve heard the stories… you’re an absolute legend.”

Brushing off my threads, I cocked my head sideways and smiled gently at the stench ridden individual. He was a chubby little fellow and wore one of those stripy tops that pirates are often associated with. His most distinguishing feature was definitely his beard though – as it seemed to have leftover pieces of yesterday’s bowl of cornflakes hanging from it.

“Yeah, I guess I am!” I proclaimed, with a fake sense of achievement shining through.

“Whoa, I feel so honoured to finally meet you!” announced the poor fellow, whilst making a beeline for my left paw. “It’s just… It’s just… fucking amazing!”

ERROR! MONKEY ISLAND.EXE HAS ENCOUNTERED A FATAL ERROR! PROGRAMME WILL AUTOMATICALLY TERMINATE! LUCASARTS CHARACTERS AREN’T ALLOWED TO SWEAR!

Maybe it was a sign, but either way, I knew I shouldn’t have been looking to the past for inspiration.

“C’mon Marty! Jump in!” screamed Doc, punching a few co-ordinates into the mainframe panel in the front of the vehicle. The white haired science nut verbally climaxed as he chanted his next (and final) line. “It’s time to go back to…”