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| THE SECRET FORCES OF THE HOLY ORDER OF SOCKISM |
| This very informative page is dedicated to the devoted gibbons who risk their lives everyday to defend our faith. Their training involves tests of strength, agility, aptitude and combat skills, all administered by the master Guru Gerbil, Sphincter. They also perform daily exercises (and exorcisms) to build and tone their bodies ready to go into battle against the evil flamingo minions (or flaminions) of Shreddies and Kerrang. Listed on this page are some examples of the rigorous training they go through and, if you follow them correctly, you too could become a Ninja Gibbon. |
| DIET - A typical day's menu BREAKFAST Muesli or Special K ELEVENSES Earl Grey and two chocolate digestives LUNCH Chicken and lettuce tortilla wrap AFTERNOON SNACK Orange Calippo TEA Escargots avec moules marinieres et soupe de poisson SUPPER Stale bread and dripping |
| APTITUDE TEST COMING SOON |
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| TRAINING CIRCUIT |
| Chin Ups - continously for 30 hours |
| Arse Ups - continously for 25 hours |
| Multiple Banana Eating - 2 every 5 seconds |
| Evil Ball Stealing - very, very cruel game!! |
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| Instant Defecation on Demand* - (self explanatory) |
| * for highly experienced gibbons as Instant Defecation should be attempted only in extreme circumstances |
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| Flamingo Impersonation - essential for special agent gibbons in infiltrating the flamingo armies of Shreddies and Kerrang! |
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| Fishing Whilst Disguised as a Walrus - this is fun |
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