"Am I dead?"

She heard a nervous chuckle and looked up, "Not today Rachel," Noah was standing over her.

"What happened?"

Noah chuckled and held his hand out to her. She took it and dusted herself off. "Boy are you one lucky woman, I don't think I've ever seen Buck move that fast!"

She looked down and saw Buck sprawled out on the ground. His face was ashen. "Buck? You okay honey?"

"The stage?" He sat up and looked down the street.

Noah pulled him up on his feet, "Gone! It was almost like it came outta nowhere and went on home like the devil himself was after it.."

"Or drivin' it.... he almost ran you down Rachel," Thompkins had just reached them, "I thought you were done for."

Buck walked a little bit aways from the group and looked down the streets and alleys... there...

...what a pity...

...down the street to the right, disappearing around the corner a figure in black. It stopped and waved a mock salute, finally disappearing in a gust of wind.

...I won't miss next time...

* * * * *

When Teaspoon got back from the Willow Island Station late that day he found the riders were a sorry lookin' bunch and he told them so.

"What's the matter boys...y'all need me to babysit your bottoms so ya don't get in trouble?"

Lou had just redressed Jimmy's wound and had started on Kid's arm burns, "It's a good thing you had Buck with you Kid, or this would have been a lot worse."

Teaspoon squinted a look in Kid's direction and winced at the burns and blisters that covered his forearm. "Wow Kid, I thought I taught you better than that? Where's Buck anyway? He out on a run?"

The riders looked around but it was Noah who spoke up. "He's been sitting out on the fence since we brought Rachel back this mornin'."

Teaspoon had already heard from Rachel, "I'll go talk to him. Y'all think you can manage to eat supper without killin' yerselves?" He winked at Lou and headed back out the door.

_____

Buck sat on the fence, his eyes closed, listening for more voices on the wind. The voices were there, but just out of reach and strangely enough Buck was glad. If the voices stayed away... then maybe the danger had past.

A strong hand clapped down on his shoulder and Buck slowly opened his stormy eyes. "Whatcha doin' out here all be yer lonesome Buck?"

Buck looked at the man next to him and said nothing.

"Well, the others are just settin' down to eat, you think you wanna join 'em?"

Buck shook his head and stared down at the dirt. "I have a great fear in my heart. Something is coming after us... and I think I brought it here."

"That sounds like a strong feelin' there, I think I know just what we both need." Teaspoon jumped down of the fence and cursed his old knees, "Come on down now, we ain't got all night. I want to catch some shut eye before sunrise."

Buck followed behind Teaspoon. He knew exactly where they were going. The sweat lodge had been a favorite place to bring his riders when they needed to talk things out... and Buck realized this was no exception.

They sat in quiet for several long minutes before Buck opened up to the man he had come to respect like a father, "I think he's after me."

"He?" Teaspoon questioned.

Buck nodded and took a deep breath, "A man... dressed in black from head to toe... he's been haunting my steps for days."

An eyebrow arched in response, "Funny you used the word Haunt Buck." Buck showed no reaction and Teaspoon encouraged him to go on.

"Looking back, they were all hurt for no reason. They were threatening no one. It makes no sense, but the voice tells me they are not being hurt by chance... they are the targets... and I will not be able to stop it."

"Voices? Tell me son, do you recognize the voice?"

Buck closed his eyes and felt the heat bathe his skin, "No, but it is still there... whispering these words to me... I think the others fear for my sanity. Sometimes,like this moment, I fear they are right."

"Whoa there son," Teaspoon took his kerchief and wiped off his face, "No one thinks yer losin' it. Their jus' concerned about you... especially after Ike-"

Buck's shoulders tensed as he heard his friend's name. "I know Teaspoon, and I've been thinkin' about what you told me the first time I went after Neville. I wonder if I should've listened to you more."

Teaspoon chuckled and turned to face the young man sittin' next to him, "Should've? Well hell son, there ain't no 'should've' about it, and the longer you deny what you're carryin' around in side of you... the longer this cloud will hang over all of us!" Teaspoon pulled his feet under him, "Now I'm heading off to get all clean and sweet smellin' or Rachel won't let me eat, but I think you should stay here as long as you need."

Teaspoon exited and a cool breathe of air rushed in. Buck sat there staring at the wall, his mind in turmoil. Teaspoon could certainly act the fool when he wanted to, but when you come right down to it... the man had as much sage wisdom as any medicine man he'd ever met.

He thought about Ike and how he'd been powerless to save him... terrible doubts crept into his mind... 'I wasn't fast enough to save Ike, and sooner or later someone will get hurt or worse because I didn't act.'

Bucks eyes crept shut as he let the heat of the lodge lull his body and his mind... 'I should really go inside...' he thought, and a moment later he was asleep.

______

A hand carefully shook him awake, it the dim light of the night sky, he could not see who it was. Another hand touched his arm and warm fingers wrapped around him, helping him to his feet. He stood out in the open air gazing out at the sky above him. The black cloud of night was shining with stars tonight and the full moon cast a soft glow upon the earth below.

~my son, do you see before you the land of our ancestors? This is a vision of it's past~

Buck nodded his head as the stars beat out a rhythm against the silence of his soul.

~it is the same as your soul...when you flourish so it does, when you fear and find turmoil... so it does...~

A graceful hand past before his eyes,

~this is the truth as it is now. In it's present~

The black cloud of night hung torn across the sky and shadows, fierce and angy tear at the fabric, letting in strife and fear. Pain and sorrow.

'What is happening?'

~my dear son, you have always lived with honor and purpose, your friends were your strength. You have let fear and regret take a hold of your heart. This is no way for me to free your soul. If you continue to hide from what you know is true... you will continue to be torn by these demons within... your friends will suffer and you will lose them as you have lost your way.~

Buck felt a burning in his stomach and he looked down. Blood from a fresh bullet wound spilled down his body. A second jolt and a third, his life blood poured out of him as he fell to his knees. He held out his hands, covered in his own blood, pleading for help.

A smile filled his mind:

~you have always had the power to help yourself... you must remember how to use it~

"Please," he begged, "help me."

~you must cast away despair, that is the only way to save them. You must step back away from the darkness of your soul before it engulfs you my child~

The voice caressed his mind as it took it's leave, he called out "Wait! Wait!"

_____

"Buck! Buck! Wake up!"

Buck shot upright and leaned back to look into the face of his friend, Lou. She was on her knees in the opening of the sweat lodge and was shaking him, "Wow. That must have been some dream! Teaspoon sent me out here to wake you before you froze..." The fire had died down long ago, and she handed him a blanket as he began to shiver in the cool night air. "Now come on in... we have a big day ahead of us tomorrow. They need some new horses in Seneca and a few of the new mustangs still need some training."

She stood and headed back toward the bunkhouse. Buck was not far behind when he saw a shadow following behind her. His fear held him silent and before he could gather the courage to speak ... she shut the door. The shadow remained at the door for a moment, and then disappeared into the darkness.