THE INDIE ROCK SITE "The home of Indie Rock, ever since you were evicted"
		Olympic Flame Housed by Gigantic Cuban Cigar "Now that's a punishment I deserve!" By Pedro Van Dennison
	This year's Olympics have been declared utterly awesome by many, outrageously brilliant by many more! As we watched in incredible boredom as the last torch bearer ran up the steps, we all awoke from our half camatose conditions to realize that he wasn't lighting a NORMAL Olympic cauldron! Instead, the conventional flame vessel was replaced by ONE FRICKIN' HUGE STOGIE!      "It's not a cigar." said Chieftain of the Olympic Denial Committee, Laramie Pancitalos. He then went on to explain that it was meant to look like one of those sleek rocket ships often stylized in 1950s comic books. Upon review of the tapes...it sort of does.      Yet, as Americans watched the lighting ceremony, the Agency for Investingating Conspiracies (AIC) inspected the tapes, and realzied that this was no ordinary cigar. They released this statement: "We've come to the conclusion that the Cauldron is a Cuban Cigar, and that the Greek Government is on the payroll of a very dangerous, very old man who enjoys smoking Cuban Cigars."      The matter is being investigated by top ranking officials, but the Greecian Chancellor has said, "We think you fellas are making a big deal about this." The American Proletariat replied, "Yes, we are." Leaders around the world have hailed this unanimous agreement as the 'next step in securing lasting peace in the Middle-East.'      When the attenders of the Games were asked what they thought about the Cauldron, one incredibly young, gorgeous, blonde woman replied, "...hee hee, you're cute."  And it doesn't take a high, drunken woman to see that! Not that I had any idea she was drunk at the time...      In response to this whole ordeal, we've nuked Holland. "Remember the Alamo!"--- CUT Pedro Van Dennison is a very handsome, young Italian painter who spends his time cleaning his very big mansion, and pruning his hedgehog, Bruno. It really doesn't take a woman under the influence of hallucinogenic chemicals or alcoholic beverages to see that he is a keeper.