"Receives Key to City"
By: Skippy Castor
The display of valor occured whenever the dog, named Skippy, was cornered in an alleyway by two carpet bagging hoodlums. Skippy's yelps were heard on the street by Skippy, and he rushed into the alleyway, where he found Skippy in a terrible plight. "I like dogs." Skippy was quoted as saying, and we don't blame him. In fact, we like dogs, too.
In no less than a half an hour, Skippy had managed to save Skippy by luring the two fiends into a large house full of many contraptions that Skippy instantaneously rigged into booby traps. Fortunately for all of us, he had two very large boobies on his trail and before you could say "Here, Skippy," Skippy had managed to thwart the two illegal oatmeal toters. "I like contraptions." Skippy was quoted as saying. We don't, but in cases where contraptions are rigged up to catch a booby, we DO like them.
"It is my pleasure to award this very large, unuseful key to Skippy," said Mayor Skippy, "To signify that he done some good." Darn tootin', Skippy! Skippy did do good! And with that said, Mayor Skippy handed Skippy the Key to the City at which time Skippy leapt upon Skippy, somethering him with big, wet kisses. We hope you all sleep well tonight, knowing that Skippy has made the town a safer place, and also has the key to your door in his back pocket.