A group shot of all the current player characters online in SWG.

DAY THREE
HOPE LEVEL - 80%
MONEY SPENT - No money, just a small piece of my soul.
TIME SPENT IN GAME - NONE

I spent the day trying to muddle through the evil registration and amusing myself by reading the galaxies forums which consisted of 3 people who had apparently at some point played the game for 10 minutes, and the hundreds of people they were imparting their vast knowledge on: "Tattoine has, like, a lot of sand...". Marvellous, my friend, marvellous.
Late in the day I broke through and got to make my character after promising unnamed ancient deities any number of things in exchange for the damn thing to work. Next step, create my character! He was so cool and stuff, and I have to admit the character creation system is really good...my enthusiasm raised, maybe things would work out after all! I was so young and retarded then. LISTEN TO ME, this game hates you! It will kill all of your family and friends! It will skin your cat and sell the pelt on Ebay! It will inject flesh eating virus into your left testicle!
Anyway, then I did the nifty little tutorial to learn the controls...and after that, I could choose wherever I wanted to go. I chose Tattooine, of course, because I'm mad elite and I wanted to go in the mos eisley cantina and SHOOT EVERYONE CUZ I'M MAD KILLA_THRILLA YO!!!! Actually you can't kill a damn thing in this game, except the two kinds of NPC 'monsters'...the tiny ones you can kill that give you nothing, or the huge ones that slaughter you over and over again. But we'll touch on that later.
For now, I was on my way to massive multiplayer online bliss...all I had to do was wait for it to load.
and wait.
and wait.
And...what the hell? Tattooine looks a helluva lot like my character select screen. Ten tries later, I was getting the same results...and a quick check on the forum revealed so were a thousand other people. Time for bed, where I would force myself to vomit out the remains of my enthusiasm.

Just two more movie characters you'll never meet in the game.

DAY FOUR/FIVE
HOPE LEVEL - 99%!
MONEY SPENT - The Rest of my Soul.
TIME SPENT IN GAME - 2 hours/120 Minutes

I spent two thirds of Day Four trying to solve the server problem. I managed to get four characters deleted...then HOLY SHIT I GOT ON A PLANET! Somehow one of my characters appeared on Naboo, only to be killed 10 minutes later by evil wilderness NPC's before I even met another person. Then, back to the server problems.
Day Five, I got in. The universe promptly forgot about the server glitch and everything went nice and smooth...Wayne managed to get in too and we spent lots of time killing Jawas because they remind us of midgets dressed like homies. We learned skills, joined hunting parties, tried to do missions and got side-tracked, got our asses handed to us by an NPC that re-appeared 2 seconds after we killed it, and good times were had by all...until I had to go run errands. But I didn't care...it was working now, I could play ANYTIME!

DAY SIX
HOPE LEVEL - 3%
MONEY SPENT - Theoretically $50
TIME SPENT IN GAME - None

Alright, look. I hate MMORPG's...I always have. But I keep trying the damn things. Everquest? So full of dumbasses I had to leave before any more of them killed themselves in real life because I murdered their character and took his pants of +2. Ultima Online? Same deal, just less fat, greasy, virgins. Sims Online? Oh, no, really, your little sim standing there and yelling at walls is great for the first week...but the fun fades. Now this piece of cow-flop...and when Worlds of Warcraft comes out, I'll hop on that one too. I'm just not very bright.
Anyway, When I tried to log-on this final day, it gave me an error saying I didn't have enough Physical memory/RAM to play the game. Funny, I DID YESTERDAY. I don't recall taking any out..so what could have gone wrong? Oh, nothing, just the powers that be arbitrarily changing the minimum requirement and blocking out everyone below it without warning. The only fix? Go buy more RAM for roughly $50. Now, it took me longer then usual, but I'm at the point of exasperation with this game and it's just not worth the BS...I've spent too much on it already. But wait! It's a computer game! What does that matter? Because nazi-regime store-clusters like EB don't take computer game returns. So either I sink even MORE cash into this game and try to siphone some enjoyment out of it, or I throw the damn thing in the closet and know I -wasted- all that cash. I blame Rumsfeld.
Anyway, I'm off to EB to try and make enough of a scene(Which may or may not include fecal matter) to get them to give me $50 store credit for this damn thing, unless I see some cheap RAM first. Until then, don't come near this game...want a reason not to? Look at this math:
Assuming I buy the RAM to keep playing, I'll have spent a total of $180 on this game. I've played this game 120 minutes. I suck hard at math, but this ratio IS NOT GOOD.

Get used to staring at your massacred corpse, fanboy.