Yes, we shall be scraping the bottom of the closet today amigos! See, all you fancy kids with your 80s toys that had TV shows and were popular...PAH! Who needs that when you can have cylindrical things with scrunchy arms and suction cups for their bottom half? Well, not many people figured out just how cool Roboforce was...more or less because IT SUCKED.
Oh, you think you've never heard of it...you think you have no idea what it is. But you've seen at least one of these guys around, I guarantee it. The line consisted of about a dozen similair robots, half good and half bad...the good ones all fit into dumb stereotypes like "the construction guy", "the fire guy", "the helicopter-head guy"...well, anyway. Even worse were the EVIL bad guys...with names like "Hun-Dredd" and "Vulgar"...Ooooh! Perhaps they fling robotic boogers at the good guys, whatever their collective name was. Nevertheless, everyone has seen Maxx Steele at least once...

Ah yes, THAT GUY. For some reason this stupid creation was made into about a BILLION different types of toy; ranging all the way up to one of those child-sized rolling deals that can hold your soda and terrorize any household pet...
The other characters didn't really matter, but were of similair construction. They had weird scrunchy arm things which "moved" when you pressed a button on their back. However, the arms fell apart faster then a hollywood romance. There were scattered sorts of accesories which were possibly weapons, but couldn't be put on the hands in any useful fashion, and instead stuck out at impossible angles. They were all lost...purposefully, I think. This way you could cry and whine and get the parents to give you a good toy from Masters of the Universe or Transformers. My armies of both these toys, by the way, regularly kicked the bejeezus out of "roboforce"...even the bloody Gobots beat these guys up. They were the fat kid with asthma of my toy playground.

...and most of them looked stupid. For example, Vulgar looked like a mole with pink-eye and a bad nose-job. The next big feature of the toys were suction cups. They had no legs, wheels, tank-treads, nothing...just suction cups. Maybe that's why there was no series, as it's kinda hard to wage war when your mobility is limited to sticking on flat surfaces...Oh, and the suction cups DIDN'T work. Another thing some of them had, god knows why, was a weird hook thing on their backs, as if to hang from things...or maybe, hopefully, more like to hang themselves for beign utter wastes. These toys are the equivalent of the sort of person who writes hate mail to every single person who did a review of Lord of the Rings and misspelled one of the character names...why? They're all useless.

...and yet they spawned lots of vehicles and even this enormous base. The base had various features, like a big crane thing that fell off, big guns that fell off, and a HANDLE! WHOOPEE! There was also a weird globed dome thing that turned around to reveal nothing...So take THAT, "Enemy"(because yes, one bad guy was named "Enemy") Overall, I can't say much about the actual characters because there was no show or anything else to establish them. There are fan-sites about them, but I am shunning anyone who would put together a fan-site about Robo-Force. And if you wish you could see a site like that, I have a better place for you to go...Just check out the Death Clock and figure out how much longer you'll be using up good oxygen.

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