Green, green, my love is green He's the cutest Martian ever seen. He flew in from outer space And spent the night at my place, Hugged me tight, I got a quiver. Then he left with my liver. © SWAMPETTA (SWAMPETTA@aol.com)






The Izzard Twins is what they were named. “I’m Izzy Izzard,” the elder proclaimed. “I’m elder by a minute. “There’s fame and glory in it.” Lizzy Izzard felt that she’d been defamed. © Paul (AHikingDude@aol.com)















Special Diet

Sally Sow called her piglets, “Come on darlings, time to eat.” The wiggly little wigglets Fought to find an empty teat.

Sally’s tiniest baby Was pushed aside at the sow, So she had the thought, “Maybe I can get milk from the cow.”

Bossy was more than willing, For with milk she nearly burst. Down the piglet’s throat spilling, The milk quenched the baby’s thirst.

After many weeks passed by, And the piglets were all grown, “Oink, oink,” most were heard to cry – One had a “mooo” of her own. © RickMack (jotoma@bellsouth.net)





A devious nun in a wimple Trying to explain that physics is simple. Not brazen is the coulomb Nor demonic in its aplomb. Into the conflagration with Sr. Rosalie Dalrymple!! © Paul (AHikingDude@aol.com)








The Mall

Knowing he would pay She dragged him to the Mall Whatever she chose to buy Would cost her nothing at all.

He always had a bankroll Stashed deep within his jacket It made her giddy just to think He lived in an upper bracket.

He hoped she'd go to Sears He could wander on his own He would check the hardware section And she would leave him alone.

She headed straight for Victoria's Secret, Much to his dismay, She looked through all the frilly stuff Embarrassment turned him away.

To Bath & Body Works she headed The aromas made him ill To think he had to suffer this And then get stuck with the bill.

He left her in the lotion aisle The odors made him wince, He hurried to the Food Court And no one's seen him since. © Frannie (Frannie516@aol.com)

Ida trod upon the ground Angrily stomping with noone around She was angry as you could see Stung on the rump by a bee © Sharon (Sunyskys43@aol.com)












Literalist

She saw the big man crying When she came in to the house. His tears she started drying With the shirttails of her blouse.

The caterer had lent him To prepare for her affair. Cutting onions had sent him This outpouring of despair.

She told him that he should try Slicing them under water, Then, when two hours went by, He was found by her daughter.

He’d done exactly as told, Bringing onions in the pool. When found, his body was cold, In the eight-foot end, poor fool.

The medics carried him out, While guests gathered in a group. The hostess said with a pout, “There’ll be no French onion soup.” ©RickMack (jotoma@bellsouth.net)








Mr. Kinetic met Ms Potential At the beautiful Niagara Falls. He checked his supplies essential And sadly found that Viagra calls.

He popped a pill on the Maid of the Mist, After a promise that sounded potential. She bailed out after an ankle was twist. He felt his problems expand exponential. © Paul (AHikingDude@aol.com)