"What's the worst that could happen to an altar boy?"
~Colin, "Pilot"

"I don't want a haunted car! I already own a haunted cello."
~Faith, "A Bug's Wife"

"I don't want to turn into a raging she-devil once a month. Don't [say it]"
~Liz, "Squarewolves"

"Security, show these people out. And make sure they don't enjoy the teller's Hawaiian t-shirts."
~Bank Manager, "Dummy and Dummier"

"You look like some sort of...stewardess."
~Bob, "Miss American Pipe"

"You can't have cherries without the pitts."
-Bob, "Pilot"

Petey: Me and my friends like to come to this beaver dam sometimes.
Faith: And do what?
Petey: Pretend to be beavers, duh.
~"Dummy and Dummier"