Ok, this is friggen great. The screen name my ex made me is now gone. That was something I really liked and he said I could keep it, right now, I have no explanation as to why he did it. He never fricken tells me anything. Hence, the downfall of a beautiful thing – our relationship. Oh, I could slap that man upside the goddamned head! Really, I could. He talks about not limiting yourself and what not, but isn’t not communicating limiting yourself? I’m not a damned mind reader, and if I was, I’d be making millions of dollars as some prodigy instead of sitting my ass in school. Come on people.
You see, I’m not pissed about the screen name ordeal, I knew it was a coming. What I’m pissed about is that he never tells me anything. (If you did not catch this at the beginning of the rant, then leave and never return to the site, for I may make fun of you.) Oh, Christ. I could kill people like that. Take my one friend for instance, he holds back all the time, and it’s so damned obvious. I’ll ask him what he’s holdin on to and he just clams up. That pisses me the hell off, especially since at one point I wanted to date him – we’d never freaking last. At least, not without me killing him first for being a damned moron.
Also, I really want to get back with my ex, but am considering otherwise. While I love him and all, I can’t live without communication, because while I may be an Ice Queen to many, I am friggen human too! I need to talk! I need to feel things every and then! It gets so frustrating! ::screams:: There I feel much better now. Hey, I do have emotions too. Don’t get me wrong, my ex isn’t a bad guy, he just needs a swift kick in the ass at times. More often than not, though, I suppose. Right now, I do have another boyfriend, and while I am really happy with him, I don’t want to mislead him. You see, I have no feelings what so ever for him. It’s purely, how shall you say, a symbiotic relationship?
Don’t get me wrong, he’s a wonderful guy, but I could more or less, live without him and not be bothered? I just have a problem with hurting people. He’s a great kid, no doubt, but we just don’t always come to an understanding of each other. And it’s not like I don’t give him the time of day, but he gets all, please don’t call me. Yet he freakin whacks over me off while talking online. (Frankly, I’m a tad confused. Things like this push me away.) Phone sex I can understand and possibly tolerate, but cyber sex is just freaking stupid. (Simulated) :::Gusherrr213: Hey baby.
:::Dragon666: Hey babe, guess what I’m doin’.
:::Gusherrr213: What?
:::Dragon666: I’m making my ‘toy solider’ shoot off rockets for you.
You see, this is just dumb and annoys me. It repulses me and drives me away. If it’s going to be sex, be man enough to ask for the real thing, even though I’ll say no. It actually sparks a level of respect. You see, I’m a virgin. Until some one slips a ring on my fingers and says that we’re married, I’m not laying with anyone. Anyway, I’m through complaining, all is out of my system.
Good night all,
~The Poets Hart~