Getting By
Last year's graduation was beautiful. Great weather. Nice speeches. Lots of students being honored for CSF life membership, good grades, and scholarships. How wonderful! How exciting! How…unfair to every student out there who had dug him or herself into a massive hole and worked like a dog to get out of it, attending summer school, night school, zero period, and more, just to make it across that stage on graduation day. More...
Hidden Scars
-"There's no place for a kid with grades like these in this family."
-"Your grandfather must be turning over in his grave, listening to
you."
-"What do you mean you can't hold a 4.0, a place on the Varsity basketball
team and a job?"
-"Get out of my sight: you disgust me."
Words can leave scars deeper than any belt… More...
Editors' Notes
- Retraction: Junior Prom was not yesterday. It's tomorrow. April Fools!
- Preemptive retraction: Sky is no longer bearded.
- Our year-end issue is coming up - send us your favorite Subterranean memories!
Contact Us!
Don't miss this chance to nominate the "Most Inspirational Student." Also, keep sending your poems, letters, and rants to: TheSubterraneanTN@yahoo.com
Disclaimer
This paper is not sponsored by T.H.N.S., J.U.H.S.D., C.A., or S.W.E.L.T.C.H.E.R.S. The Subterranean has absolutely no ties with the S.W.E.L.T.C.H.E.R. movement. Please stop emailing us about S.W.E.L.T.C.H.E.R.S. because we do not condone their actions. This is a strictly non-S.W.E.L.T.C.H.E.R. production.
Divide and Conquer
Segregation is no longer a problem. With the efforts of the Civil Rights leaders of the 60s, among others, it has been outlawed - it's no longer an issue. Bullshit!
Patriotism: Blind Allegiance
or Critical Thought?
In times of trouble and conflict, the United States is known for pulling together. After September 11th, the general public united in mourning instead of cowering in fear as the terrorists had planned. At the same time, we rallied behind our leader, President Bush, unquestioningly believing everything he said. More...
Regular Features
Kudos of the Week
(via email) goes to Victor Gebhardt, for "single-handedly
organizing the walkout." Though few showed up for the event, it fostered
true discussion and deserves praise.
Runners up: The Lunch Club™ for sticking together in
the face of a grease-driven society and actually helping each other
out. True friends are hard to find.
Loser of the Week
Dumbass parents who continue to anonymously call
the school and complain about Kathryn Dalton's political views. At least
she has some, you provincial bastards.
Picture of the Week
Below is an überflattering picture of the man himself: Mr. Shurgin
We did not steal this from Littrell