Issue 3 - Turn 706

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B.E. Fallen Like A Sack Of Potatoes

Paradox Gone. World Rejoices.

Interview With President Constitution

Tribune Sport

Evil Threat Resumes Thanks To Beak And Co

FIP Take Up The Fight Against FIST

United We Stand

Rambling Randal

The Editorial

Terminals Purged List

Corby's Turnulator

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B.E. FALLEN LIKE A SACK OF POTATOES
by Nigel Villiers-Smythe

The Betelgeuse Empire is no more. The Emporer is dead, shot by an assassin from the Cat race. It has been said that the leader of the Cat race ordered this killing, and that this leader is the most influencial person that the rest of the cat race listen to. It doesn't take much investigation to find out who is behind this killing. Deformed Rabbit, former Imperial Navy ship had this to say on the matter: "Today is a sad day. Our thoughts are with the Emporers family."

What now for the Betelgeuse Empire? Their emporer is dead, and the Imperial Navy has been disbanded. The might of the once proud warships has now been scattered the length of the galaxy. As bold plans go, this was one of the best, although it was inevitably doomed to failure. Let us hope that the Imperial Navy do not look for repurcussions from this event. The Galaxy is a dangerous enough place as it is.

And in the sports news this week, FSP Stargazer took on Maher Shalal Hash Baz in a no holds barred brawl. Before the fight, he was quoted as saying "hands up all those who think I'm about to do something stupid". Well, given the $110,000 outcome, I guess that we should have all stuck our hands up. During the battle, FSP Stargazer was completely taken apart by Maher Shalal Hash Baz. In total, FSP Stargazer lost the following:

19 Warp drives, 11 Impulse Drives, 9 Sensors, 7 Cloaks, 6 Life Supports, 9 Sickbays, 13 Shields, 1 Ram, 5 Guns, 1 Disruptor, 1 Laser, 2 Missiles, 3 Drones, 5 Fighters, 19 Pods with assorted cargo ranging up to Windows(!), and 4 Artifacts. He went from mass 170 to mass 20.

In contrast, Maher Shalal Hash Baz ended up as the following:

Gained 14 Warp drives, lost 2 Impulse Drives, lost 3 Sensors, lost 2 Fighters, gained 14 Pods, gained 4 Artifacts. He did have one of his original artifacts shot off, although this was a life support artifact, and goodness only knows why FSP Stargazer decided to shoot that one off. It's not as if MSHB has any life support that needed blessing!

All in all, I think we can safely conclude that the day was well and truly won by MSHB and saying that FSP Stargazer's fighting skills leave something to be desired is likely to be a candidate for understatement of the the Millenium. Oh well. Better luck next time.

Despite the loss of most of FSP Stargazer, the Freedom of Information Party have vowed to continue the fight against Constitution. A source within the party said "The time for Constitution's truth twisting has got to stop. He has been allowed to get away with it for far too long. When will the masses realise that what he accuses Rosalind and FSP Stargazer of are exactly the same things that he himself encourages his supporters to do".

The Freedom of Information Party are said to be very happy at the news that is filtering through of the supposed restarting of some of Constitution's larger allies. They see this as the ideal opportunity to gain important influence at homeworlds which are currently owned by ships such as Maher Shalal Hash Baz and Borg Prime. They intend not to re-spark the old war that once raged between the FSP and SIR, but will not hold back if provoked. Given the short tempers of some FIP ships, it is unlikely that this will pass off without some violence. Whether this challenge is staying power is yet to be seen, although for the past two elections now there have been FIP candidates so the signs are promising.

PARADOX GONE. WORLD REJOICES.
by Nigel Villiers-Smythe

It has now been two turns since the captain of the Paradox was eaten by a pack of wild elves, and the galaxy is still glad to be rid of him.

The most vociferous of the Unholy Trinity has been totally defeated. His do or die plan of releasing Dybuk to get rid of Constitution failed, and now he has been piled on the heap of also-rans. He has also stated a desire to get away from the "bully boy beaurocracy" that he says that President Constutition practices. As such, it is entirely possible that we will never see him again in TBG. While it was a daring bid by this very vociferous member of the Unholy Trinity, it was always ultimately doomed to failure.

There is a party due to be held at Markab on turn 710 and in respect of the fact that Paradox is no longer with us, Ninja beer will be provided free of charge by the TBG Tribune team. You have to bring your own peanuts though.

Dybuk has been released again, and once again Flying Beak is at the forefront of speculation as to who released him this time. Champagne Supernova has also been in the frame due to selling 16 popcorn recently. However, President Constitution has evidence to support that Champagne Supernova did not in fact release Dybuk, although by harvesting the popcorn, he did up the reward price for the releaser. Dybuk met with one of his old adversaries - Spectral Duck. However, due to a favour exchange with the Prophet of the Mighty One, Duck had just enough favour to protect his ship, which is something he couldn't manage last time despite being Prophet of the Mighty One. His crew are not so lucky as he does not have the favour to protect them. Let us hope that the Merciful One is smiling on him and that Dybuk does not detonate a Bio-Bomb.

The question that we must ask now is when will Flying Beak learn that Dybuk is not the threat to the galaxy that he once was? There is now an organised method of protection and banishment. There are now plenty of ships that have the required favour to protect their ship, and these ships offer protection at popular places every time Dybuk is released. Surely there are better weapons to use if he is trying to make a point. All he is succeeding in doing at the moment is to show everyone exactly how unimaginative he is by constantly applying the same uneffective method of attack that the galaxy as a whole has adapted to cope with.

The recent events in New York and Washington have been well document, as has been the reaction to it. The TBG Tribune Editorial Team would like to let all those affected by the tragedy, be they America, British, German, Chinese or any other nationality that they are in our thoughts and prayers. Together, the world will unite and hopefully wipe out terrorism for good. It may be a fanciful notion in some people's minds, but it is what we have to work towards. Together we can make it. Together we can wipe out terrorism.

We start off the Editorial this issue with an apology to the Mendelssohn, Prophet of the Fierce One. In a recent article, he was labelled as a 'crony'. We realise that this was not an acceptable term to use of the Prophet and apologise for any offence caused.

Thankyou all for your feedback. As you can see, we are still ironing out the layout of the Tribune, and now the classifieds are under the headline links. Hopefully this will mean easier reading of the articles. Also, we have a new member of the team here at the Tribune. He is Rambling Randal. Each issue he will have his own column. We would like to point out that the views of the TBG Tribune and those of Rambling Randal may not coincide all the time, and that the views he puts forward should not be taken as the views of the TBG Tribune. As you can see in the classifieds, we are on the lookout for budding writers, so if you think you have the journalistic spirit in you, and would like to write articles for the TBG Tribune, then please don't hesitate to contact us at thetbgtribune@yahoo.co.uk

As ever, keep your feedback coming in. It's the only way we can improve our service to you.

The TBG Tribune Editorial Team

Interview with
Constitution - Galactic President 

This weeks interview is with Constitution, the Galactic President. He has spent over 100 turns as president, and has at times allowed a vicious campaigning strategy. See what he has to say on issues such as vote owning.

Q. When you first took on the role of Galactic President, did you envisage spending over 100 turns in the position?

Not at all. Although I have worked hard as President, I must say the longevity and depth of my support has been a wonderful surprise.

Q. What has been the most difficult part of your term so far?

Managing the various conflicts that have erupted. The coordinated Dybuk releasings by Paradox, Flying Beak and Alpha; the renewed activity of BSL, in particular the terminal purging; and the backlash to the BE tax system; have probably been the biggest challenges to date.

Obviously, the Prophets and many other ships have played significant roles too. Overall, I think we've been very successful. The BE tax was reformed, and both Paradox and the original Alpha have restared/quit. That leaves BSL and Flying Beak, and I think we've made significant progress with them.

Q. It has been said by some captains that in a truly democratic world, votes are not "owned" by anyone. What is your stance on this issue?

I agree. I don't endorse permanent vote ownership, or any arbitrary influence levels (i.e., over 100) where votes are off limites. In particular, I consider colony votes to be a free-for-all.

With homeworlds, the same basic rules apply. However, I do realize that ships seeking to become (or stay) Ministers or Presidential candidates can get upset when they "lose" a homeworld and 8 votes. Colony votes aren't worth fighting over, but ships may feel differently about homeworlds.

My position is simple -- don't pick fights or make threats about homeworld votes unless you're prepared to back it up. That goes for my allies and my opponents.

Q.Who have been the leading figures in your presidency so far, and how have they helped you to maintain your reign?

Most of the Presidential work, helping newbies and other ships, mediating disputes, or responding to production requests, is done strictly by me. The big decisions are often made in concert with the Prophets and some of our senior ships, such as Myopic, Black Pig, and LUG'S BELT.

I seek out these ships, and many others, when I need assistance or advice. Honestly, I think that may be the biggest key to my success. Really, there are too many ships, large and small, that deserved to be recognized. But I do my best to keep in touch with my supporters.

Of course, my alliance, FIST, has also been very supportive, but most of my votes actually come from independent ships -- a fact which most captains don't realize.

Q. How long do you envisage holding onto the position?

As long as I enjoy it and can continue to do good things. We have two Prophets that have served longer than me, so I'm in no rush to step down.

Q. Now that Paradox has left the game, and the hunts on Better Ship Lollipop and Flying Beak appear to be closing in, what is your next goal?

Don't underestimate BSL and Flying Beak. Closing in is one thing, but finishing the job is another. That's still a very important goal that I expect to take a while -- perhaps quite a while -- longer.

Lately, I've been focusing a lot on helping newbies get a good start, find modules, make wise decisions, and develop into good captains. One of the problems with BSL has been captains who weren't ready for his attacks. Todays newbies are tomorrows veterans -- I want them to be smart and prepared.

Q. Do you think that the new Alien V Alien court cases hinder or help you keep the position of president?

Man. So far, almost every case has worked against me, which is of course due to my success in the last election. I still think it's a good idea -- it keeps me on my toes. I'm also looking forward to the additional powers being discussed by the Galactic Council.

Q. Do you think that you would have succeeded in recent conflicts, for example the conflict between yourself and the Betelgeuse Empire, without the help of Mediators such as LUGS BELT and Rosalind?

It's hard to say. Both ships contributed at key times, but there were lots of other factors and ships involved too. The most important thing was that the BE agreed to make major changes to their tax system; the rest was simply working out the details.

Unfortunately, by the time the BE got their new tax system implemented, most TBG citizens were fed up with the whole concept. I give the BE credit for trying something bold -- but not all bold concepts are meant to succeed.

Next issue, we hope to have an interview with the longest serving prophet, Pequod.. If you have any questions that you think should be asked of him, please do not hesitate to contact us at thetbgtribune@yahoo.co.uk