Chapter Thirty-One

“You should have woken me.” Cloe stated crossly as she glared over at Ebony, her arms folded against her chest as she watched the older woman carefully apply a thick coat of lip gloss onto her bright red lips, perfecting the pout that Cloe thought was already perfect.

“I know. I know.” Ebony set down the tube of lip-gloss as she turned to face Cloe, her soft green eyes expressing her sympathies to the younger girl. “But I already told you, I wasn’t really thinking too clearly last night. All I could think about was making sure that Bray didn’t get away with what he tried to do. Not that it really helped.”

Cloe nodded as she gnawed on her lower lip. Ebony’s anger towards Bray still radiated from her every pour. It was obvious that Ebony was not satisfied with the beating she and Panther had delivered to Bray when they found him out on the veranda.

A small shiver raced down Cloe’s spine as she recalled how she had found Bray that morning, laying out on the couch, some of his injuries still bleeding. He had so many bruises that Cloe was barely able to recognize him as the Bray she had conversed with just the day before.

Cloe hadn’t been aware of any of the events that had occurred the night before. She had naturally assumed that sometime during the night the Chosen or some other vicious tribe had happened across their small hideout in the racetrack house. Bray had to have been on guard duty and they took him out, then moved onto the rest of the occupants of the house.

She had been terrified that everyone had been murdered in their sleep and that somehow they had missed her, but then she realized if everyone was dead Bray would not have been laid out on the couch with blanket and pillow. But the house was still deathly still and it was far too late into the morning for everyone to still be asleep.

Bray had let out a low moan then and Cloe had gone into autopilot. She had found some dressings in the kitchen and in the main bathroom and began to clean Bray’s wounds to the best of her ability. As she worked on stopping the bleeding on his forearm she realized that whoever had cut Bray had known exactly what they were doing. They had purposely avoided any major arteries and made sure that he would survive his injuries.

“Cloe? Have you heard a single word of what I just said?” Ebony’s voice cut into Cloe’s memories of that morning.

“Huh?” She jerked her head up, her face flushing crimson. “No, I’m sorry, Ebony. I was just spacing out. What did you say?”

Ebony smiled sympathetically and nodded. “Not much. I just asked what you would have voted if you had been woken up last night.”

“Oh.” A cold hand clutched Cloe’s stomach, making her feel ill. She didn’t really know what she would have done. She knew Ebony wanted Cloe to say that she would have agreed with the former Loco’s decision, but Cloe just couldn’t. After seeing the pain that Bray was in, she knew he had suffered far more than any attempted rapist would have before the virus.

“Well?” Ebony pressed, crossing the room and taking a seat on Cloe’s bed beside her. “Would you have wanted Bray to be killed like Pride and Panther wanted to do or would you have wanted him thrown out of the tribe.”

Cloe sucked in a deep breath, studying Ebony’s face carefully. She didn’t want to disappoint Ebony or jeopardize their newfound friendship, but she knew that she couldn’t even pretend she would have wanted Bray to be thrown out and left to fend for himself, especially in the condition Ebony and Panther had left him in.

“Neither.” She stated finally, dropping her gaze so she would not have to see the disappointment on Ebony’s face. “You should have seen him this morning, Ebony. He was hurting so badly. When I found him I didn’t even think that it might have been someone from our own tribe that had hurt him. His wounds were so cruel, so harsh. I just couldn’t believe that well…” She trailed off, not wanting to say the rest of the words.

“You didn’t want to believe that I was capable of something like that.” Ebony finished for her with a heavy sigh.

Cloe looked up and nodded slowly, wishing that she could take the words back. She could see the pain flickering in Ebony’s eyes and knew that she had been the cause of it. “I’m sorry Ebony. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“No.” Ebony shook her head, causing her still loose braids to spray across her shoulders. “It’s alright, Cloe. It’s something that would have come up sooner or later. I know you know that I was once a Loco, right? And being a Loco meant that you had to be able to do certain things. Certain things without even flinching.

“I was never so good at it.” She continued, pushing aside a braid and tucking it behind her ear. “But I did do a lot of things that I was not proud of. Things that still haunt me whenever I close my eyes. I know how to kill a man in less than ten seconds without using any weapons. I haven’t ever used that knowledge, but I still have it.”

“Please, Ebony. I don’t want to hear this.” Cloe turned away, distressed at the image Ebony was painting for her in her mind. Cloe remembered quite well the Ebony that had broken into the mall on several occasions, kidnapping Bray and stealing the antidote, but Cloe found it difficult to associate the Ebony she knew now with that Ebony back then. She didn’t want to realize that her friend was the same Ebony who had terrorized the streets of the city alongside Zoot, leaving hundreds of kids wounded or dead.

“I know you don’t.” Ebony said quietly, turning Cloe’s face back so she would look her in the eyes. “But it’s something you have to know. I’m not a nice person, Clo. I’m the type of person your parents would have made you walk on the other side of the street of if you saw me.”

“That’s not true.” Cloe protested, her eyes flashing. “You’re not that person any more, Ebony. Maybe you once weren’t exactly role model material, but you’ve changed. Everyone’s seen it. I have. Amber has. Everyone. The Gaians trust you. That’s something that none of the other city kids can say. They wouldn’t trust someone who was evil like you say you are.”

“Maybe.” Ebony whispered softly. “But maybe not. I once thought that I had put Ebony, Empress of the Locos behind me, but last night…”

“Last night you lost control.” Cloe told her gently. “Everyone does. But you can’t judge yourself so harshly because of that. Ebony, you’re a good person. You may still have some issues, but doesn’t everyone?”

Ebony stared down at Cloe, her face void of any expression as she mulled over Cloe’s words. At long last a faint smile crossed her lips and she nodded. “Thanks Cloe.” She whispered softly, reaching over and giving Cloe a friendly side hug. “I really needed to hear that.”

“I know you did.” Cloe hugged Ebony back offering the older woman a smile. “And believe me, I’ll be here for you next time you need to hear it.”

“Thanks Cloe.” Ebony murmured softly. “I really appreciate it.”

Cloe nodded as she slowly detangled herself from Ebony’s hug. “Now, come on, you promised me you’d teach me how to do something different with my hair. I’m quite sick of this annoying ponytail.”

~*~*~

“I’m not an invalid, Pride!” Amber exclaimed, grabbing the pillow that earlier Ocelot had propped up behind her and launched it at the tall young Gaian who was sitting in a chair at her bedside ordering her that she could not get up for at least twenty-four hours. “I’d appreciate it if you’d stop treating me like one. I want to get up and move around. Just laying here is driving me insane.”

“But you need your rest, Eagle.” Pride protested softly as he ducked away from Amber’s clumsily thrown pillow. “You have an extremely trying night last night and you need to take care of yourself.”

“Amber.” She stated through gritted teeth. “Please call me Amber.”

“But Eagle’s your name.”

“My Gaian name.” Amber frowned. “The name of a coward who ran away from her problems. The name of a woman who left the only family she had in the world because she was upset over a man. I don’t want to be that woman any longer, Pride. I want to be Amber again. The woman who owned up to her responsibilities.”

“But the Gaians are your family now, Eagle.” Pride purposely used her chosen name. “These Mall Rats don’t even know you anymore. They’ve not been a part of your life for six months whereas we have been with you each and every day, living with you, growing with you, loving you…”

Amber pursed her lips, trying to control the strange mixture of emotions that were coursing through her. She wanted to yell and scream at Pride, but not because of what he was saying. It was because of what he was not saying. He had treated her as if she had some sort of disease since last night, avoiding her at all costs. Then suddenly this morning he appeared in her bedroom, wanting to ‘take care of her’ and yet he had not once apologized for his actions the night before.

“Pride,” Amber glanced over to her bedside table where the beautiful shell and stone necklace that Pride had given to her on their pledging ceremony. He had pressured her into making that commitment, though she had been too blind to see it then. She had not been ready, not ready in the least.

“I think you need to take this back.” She picked up the necklace and handed it to him, trying to ignore the strange mixture of pain and anger that she saw flashing in his eyes. “I care for you Pride, but as a friend and a brother. Not in the way you want me to care for you.”

Pride said nothing for several long seconds, just staring down at the necklace he held in his hand. Finally, he looked up, his eyes shimmering with unshed tears. “It’s Bray, isn’t it? You love that no good waste of human flesh, don’t you? That’s why you didn’t care when he tried to rape you last night. That’s why you didn’t want to see him punished, because you wanted him to do that to you, didn’t you?”

The accusation hung thick in the air as Amber stared wide-eyed at Pride, wishing that she had not heard him correctly. An anger began to bubble up inside her, an anger so hauntingly familiar to her that it terrified her. It had been six months since she had felt this rage, six months since she saw red. Six months since she felt like she could kill someone with her bare hands.

“Take that back, Pride.” She whispered fiercely, her anger so thick in the pit of her stomach that it was painful to speak. “Take it back right now.”

“It’s the truth, isn’t it, Amber?” He sneered at her, his tone taunting her, stirring up the anger inside her. “You wanted Bray to rape you and now you probably hate Lex because he interrupted you two. You wanted it and now you’re too afraid to admit it because you think your precious Mall Rats might think less of you. That’s it, isn’t it? That’s why you’re so upse—”

Amber was up and out of the bed before she even realized what was happening, a low guttural sound bubbling up her throat and spilling out of her mouth, reminiscent of a wild animal crying out as she protected her young. She flung herself at Pride, her nails flying, biting into Pride’s bare flesh. Her rage blinded her and sealed her ears. She could not see Pride trying to fight back, crying out in pain as she connected against him.

“Amber! Amber!” The shriek behind her jerked Amber out of her rage. “Stop it Amber! Panther! Cloe! Help me! Help me get her off him!”

Amber felt herself being hauled off Pride by at least three sets of arms as her vision slowly began to clear. Pride was staring at her, his face bloodied and his shirt torn. The chair he had been sitting on had splintered and Amber could tell both she and Pride were extremely lucky that none of the jagged edges had gone through and pierced either of their skin.

Amber bit back a gasp, her stomach twisting painfully inside her. She quickly freed herself from the grips of the three women who had pulled her off Pride so she could wretch and relieve her stomach of the painful poison that lingered there. However she found that her stomach was completely empty and it was not a poison inside her that had made her do what she had done.

“You witch!” Pride rose to his feet, standing over her but behind Ebony, Panther and Cloe who had crowded around her. She wasn’t sure if it was for Pride’s protection or her own. “You’re going to regret doing that. I can assure you of that.”

“Don’t you dare call her a witch!” Cloe shot back at him, her eyes narrowing. “We all heard what you were saying to her. You baited her. You wanted her to attack you, you bastar—“

“Cloe. Quiet.” Panther silenced her. “This is not going to solve anything. Pride, I think you need to leave. See if someone can clean your cuts. You’re extremely lucky we came in when we did.”

Amber closed her eyes as she quickly pulled her knees up against her chest, dropping into a fetal position, her head ducked. “No. Not again.” She mumbled softly to herself. “Please, not again.”

~*~*~

They had been walking for just over three hours, Lex determined as he studied the sun’s position as it blazed brightly in the sky. He had awoken extremely early in the morning, worry gnawing him in the pit of his stomach. He had gone upstairs to check on Amber, make sure she was resting peacefully, then had gone back to the living room where they had laid Bray.

Somehow Lex had not been overly surprised to find Manatee and Ocelot stationed by Bray’s side, both of them trying to control the leader of the Mall Rats as he thrashed about, his face pouring sweat. Ocelot told him that Bray had contracted a fever some time during the night and she was fearful that without medicine he would not last for very long.

They had begun discussing different ideas, ranging from going into the city to see if they could rescue Tai-San from the mall and see if she could do anything for Bray to seeing if any of the last remaining free tribes might have some sort of medicine that would alleviate Bray’s fever.

It was then that Ocelot had recalled that Caribou had left much of her medicine at the village. Ocelot did not known nearly as much about herbs and medicines as the tall willowy Gaian did, but she had watched Caribou on numerous occasions as she had administrated the concoctions she made to the ill Gaians. Ocelot was pretty sure she could figure out something that would help the ailing Mall Rat.

It had only taken a brief discussion for Lex, Manatee and Ocelot to realize that traveling to the village was the best way, so Ocelot had quickly scrawled a note to the others and explained to them where they would be going and that they would be back before dusk. It was now nearly noon and the uneasy feeling that had settled over Lex the second they began to head away from the racetrack had grown so strong that he could not ignore it any longer.

“Is something wrong Lex?” Ocelot frowned over at him, shading her eyes from the bright overhead sun. She was wearing a bandana tied around her shaved head to protect the sensitive scalp from the sun’s angry rays, but it had not protected her face which had freckled and was now beginning to burn.

“I don’t know.” Lex hesitated, wondering how he could explain the strange feeling he got in the pit of his stomach the closer he drew to the village. He wasn’t sure if it was something there or something happening back at the racetrack. All he knew was that he didn’t want to take another step closer to the abandoned Gaian village.

“What do you mean, you don’t know?” Manatee queried as he fumbled with his brightly colored Hawaiian shirt that he wore over a simple white wife beater. “You’ve been acting strange since we left this morning. What is it? What do you feel?”

“I’m not sure.” Lex began to explain, hoping that neither Gaian would think him completely nuts for not wanting to go any further. “But I’ve got to turn around.”

“We can’t.” Ocelot protested. “We’ve already discussed this. Getting this medicine is probably the only way that we can save Bray’s life. We can’t turn back now. The village is less than an hour away.”

“Not we. I.” Lex replied, shaking his head. “I’ve got to go back. I can’t explain it.”

Manatee and Ocelot exchanged glances, then the petite blonde nodded her head. “Alright, Lex. If you’re sure.” Ocelot stared at him, studying him carefully. “But it’s quite a ways back. Are you sure you don’t want to come with us to the village, get the medicine then hurry back? It would be almost as fast.”

“Plus it’s dangerous on the roads alone.” Manatee added.

“I know. But I have to go back. I can’t explain it.” Lex frowned, wishing that he could make sense of it himself. Logically he should go to the village then come back with the Gaians, but every time he thought of stepping foot inside the village a cold shiver trailed down his spine and he knew that he should not go there.

“Alright. Then you ought to head back now.” Manatee nodded. “We didn’t see any traces of the Chosen on the roads on the way here, but that doesn’t mean they won’t be there on the way back.”

“Stay close to the trees.” Ocelot added. “You’re wearing mostly black so you should be able to hide well.”

Lex nodded. He had planned on doing all those things already. “Alright.” He smiled. “I’ll see you two later tonight.”

“Uh huh.” Ocelot grinned. “Take care. And move swift.”

“I will.” Lex turned and hurriedly walked in the direction of the tree line. It would be slower hiding in the trees, but he would much rather actually make it to the track by hiding in the trees then get captured by the Chosen by staying out on the road.

~*~*~

Ebony cast a grim look around the small circle that had gathered in the kitchen trying to figure out what they were going to do with Pride. Robin, Hawk, Moose and Panther were the only Gaians who were still at the house, Ocelot and Manatee heading out earlier in the morning with Lex to try and find some medicine for Bray. Somehow the six of them had to figure out what they should do with Pride…or Amber for that matter.

“This is just so frustrating.” Hawk frowned, pushing his long brown locks away from his face. “I feel like we just did this last night.”

“This isn’t the same thing.” Cloe argued, shooting a glare in the older Gaian’s direction. “Pride isn’t even hurt. Besides, he was baiting Amber. She’s emotionally wrought right now. How did you expect her to respond?”

“Cloe has a good point there, Hawk.” Panther backed her up, flicking her curly black braids over her slim shoulders. “Basically we just have two people who need to be kept away from one another. That’s all. The answer is staring us straight in the face.”

“The answer?” Ebony turned to Panther, looking at her hopefully. She knew Panther was not going to suggest that they kill either Pride or Amber so she felt it was pretty safe to listen to her suggestion.

“We send Pride to the mall.”

“What?” Robin’s eyes widened in distress. “But that will be dangerous.”

“Living is dangerous.” Hawk grumbled. “Panther has a good suggestion. We need someone on the inside that can keep us informed on what is going on. That way we won’t be tricked like we were last time.”

“We weren’t really tricked.” Ebony pointed out. “We suspected a trap. We just weren’t nearly as prepared for it as we thought we were. The Chosen outnumbered us. We did the best we could with what we had.”

Cloe nodded her head in agreement. “I think Panther’s suggestion is a good one. No one knows Pride. Not the Mall Rats, not the Chosen. It would work out well.”

“We should let Pride have some choice in the matter, though.” Ebony stated carefully, desperately wanting to be fair. “We can’t force him to go if he doesn’t want to.”

“So let’s go ask him.” Panther shrugged her shoulders. “He’s in his room pacing back and forth like a caged animal.”

“First don’t we need to take a vote on it?” Cloe asked. “Or are we all agreed that this is what we need to do?”

Ebony glanced around the circle, seeing everyone nod their heads, even the nine-year-old Moose who didn’t really understand everything that was going on. “Alright then, we’ll ask Pride if he’d be willing to become our spy on the inside. That way he can keep an eye on May as well as the other Mall Rats. He can tell us who has remained loyal and who has not.”

“I’ll go talk to him.” Hawk offered himself. “He’d probably accept it best from me, since he isn’t exactly happy with the rest of you.” Hawk’s lips turned up in a quirky smile. He nodded at them, then turned and walked in the direction of the room Pride was pacing in, as Ebony crossed her fingers and praying that Pride would be receptive to the idea.

~*~*~

[I]The explosion was loud. Louder that she thought possible as it ripped through the long empty corridors, echoing and making the sound deafening. She winced in pain, her hands reaching for her ears as she tried to soften the blow. Her eardrums felt as if they had burst from the sudden and extreme sound and she would have stood there trying to figure out what had happened if he hadn’t grabbed her right then.

“Come on!” He explained, ripping her away from where she stood behind the chair she had been seated in only moments before. “We’ve got to get out of here! The whole place is blowing up!”

He jerked her away, pulling her towards the long corridor that she knew led to the exit. She struggled to keep up, her legs screaming in protest, already sore from the long trek up Eagle Mountain. She was not in nearly as good of shape as she used to be back when she was in school and her Phys. Ed. teacher made her run laps every day.

Someone pushed past her and she found herself looking over her shoulder as he led her out of the building. The rest of the Mall Rats were frantically running out of the building, their expressions panicked. Seeing their panic seemed to strangely calm her and make her think clearer than she thought was possible in a situation like this.

“My jacket!” She exclaimed, stopping in her tracks. “I left my jacket in there.”

“Well you can’t go back for it now! That’d be suicide.” He shouted back, tightening his grip on her hand. “We’ve got to get out of here.”

“No, I have to go back.” She wrenched free. “You don’t understand.” She turned and ran in the opposite direction, sealing her ears against his cries after her. Several of the other Mall Rats stopped her, telling her she was going in the wrong direction, but she shook her head. She had to retrieve her jacket if it was the last thing she did.

The room was full of fire and smoke by the time she made it back, and her eyes quickly scanned the area where she had been sitting earlier. Her jacket was exactly where she left it, hanging on the back of her chair. She crossed the room and snatched it up, her hand diving into the pocket and retrieving the real item she had gone back for.

“Oh thank God.” She mumbled, slipping the slender silver ring back onto her finger on her left hand. He would never have understood how important it was for her to go back for the ring. He would have told her that he would get her another one, but another one could never replace this one.

A smile flitted across her face as she turned and ran back in the direction of the corridor. None of the other Mall Rats were in sight, but she figured she knew the way back. She turned down the hallways, moving as quickly as her sore legs would take her, not really paying much attention to where she was going.

And then it happened. Her feet found something in the smoky semi-darkness. She felt herself begin to fall forward and her hands flew wildly trying to find something to catch herself. But it was no good, she fell, connecting hard with the concrete floor below. A sharp pain shot through her lower abdomen and she knew she had hurt herself pretty badly, but somehow she had struggled to her feet and kept running, tears streaming down her face as she ignored the pain.

The corridors were endless and she knew she had taken the wrong hall. But she kept moving knowing that eventually one of them would lead her out. Either that or she would die in that burning building and it wouldn’t matter anyway.

At long last she saw a glimmer of day light ahead of her and she doubled her speed. She pushed through the shattered glass doorways in front of her, gulping in the fresh mountain air that surrounded her.

She knew she had to get as far away from the self-destructing building as possible, so she pressed onward, her feet unsteady underneath her. Somehow she missed a step and she found herself rolling down the hillside, her feet tumbling over head, her body hitting several sharp rocks on the way down.

“Noooo!” She screamed as she fell, but she knew that her screams could not save her. She closed her eyes and gave herself to the fall, desperately praying that it would end soon.

At long last her body skidded to a stop. She opened her eyes, ignoring the shooting pain coursing through her body. She had fallen down a rather steep hillside and she knew there was no way she could possibly climb back up it – not in the condition she was in.

Instead of trying to find a way back to the observatory where her friends would find her, she turned to her injuries. Cuts and bruises littered her body, but her main concern was the growing pain in her lower abdomen.

“No.” She whispered, seeing the bright crimson flow soaking through her clothes. “No. Anything but this.” She grabbed her jacket – the damned jacket that had done this to her – and wadded it up, trying to stop the blood flow, but it was no use. In only a matter of seconds the jacket was soaked through.

She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to control the tears, but it was no use. They began to flow freely down her cheeks as she collapsed wearily against the rocky mountain ground, her mind traveling down that dangerous path, wondering just what Lex would say when he found out she had killed their baby.[/I]

Amber shot straight up in bed, her eyes wide with fright as she clutched her body tightly around her. The dream was still vivid in her memory. She could recall everything, from the hot smoke that had enveloped her to the pain in her abdomen and the sharp realization that she had lost her baby.

‘But that wasn’t me.’ Amber realized, closing her eyes as she struggled to control her tears. It had not been her memories of the explosion on Eagle Mountain that had haunted her, but the memories of someone else.

“Zandra.” She whispered the name almost reverently. “Oh Zandra. I’m so sorry.”