I graduated from high school
and Mom and Dad gave me a new Bible.
That summer I worked at J.J. Newberry's
grinding keys
and selling hardware.
I bought a new hammer for Daddy
because his was broken in half
mended with duct tape
and it bent when you used it to hammer.
I bought Mom a new potato masher
since she had lost hers
somewhere in the move up from Louisiana.
I used some of my money to buy clothes
for college
and the rest I kept to help pay for my classes.
The night before I left
I got out my old brown cardboard suitcase
that had been with me since we left Gila Bend
and still had "Lynne's Suitcase" scrawled on it
written in crayon by my first-grade self
put it on the bed
and packed my new undies
skirts
sweaters
shoes
pajamas
and laid my new Bible on top.
Then I closed it and set it by the dresser.
When we had devotions
Daddy prayed that I would be okay
that the Lord would look after me
and that I would acknowledge Him as my Savior
and allow Him to direct my paths.
I felt like crying
because I was lonely and sad and scared
but of course I didn't
because I was eighteen years old.
It was a long night.
My baby sister slept in the bed beside me
but I barely knew her
and she didn't know me
because I was gone all the time
going to school
working
coming home late and tired
with homework still to do
and dishes to wash
and clothes to run through the wringer
and hang to dry in the cellar
because Mom just couldn't do it all anymore.
Still, I rolled over and hugged her warm little body close to me.
The next morning it was overcast
and chilly
and Mom had oatmeal thickening in a pan
so I had a bowl of it
and some toast
then Brother Bradford
the church member who was taking me away
along with his son, James
honked
and Daddy got my suitcase
and put it into the trunk with the three fancy black ones
that belonged to James.
Mom came out and kissed me goodbye
and Daddy hugged me
and said
"Bye, Lynna-girl, be good now"
and the boys and Little Paul kissed me goodbye
and I got in the car
and we went down Boonton Hill
to drive for eight hours
into the unknown.
When we finally got there
I looked at the big brick buildings
and the students outside raking the huge lawns
clean of their fall leaves
and I felt like I couldn't get out of the car.
I just wanted to go home.
Music Playing: Let It Be
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