THIS IS MY OPINION PAGE
WARNING: THIS HAS STRONG VIEWS AND OPINIONS ON IT AND MAYBE PROFANITY
IF THIS OFFENDS YOU, I AM SORRY, BUT YOU CAN LEAVE NOW
(By the way these are OPINIONS not facts. Dont't sue me for libal or whatever it's called.)
1. Mrs. Kay F. Gould should no longer be principal at Maple
Grove Jr/Sr High School near Jamestown NY (yes the AIDS
Jamestown from the news) (she's the principal of my old
high school and soon I'll have a sound clip of something she
said to a student's answering machine)Here it is. This wave file
is here without permission so Gould can't sue my friends.
gould.wav
2. Dogs(and other animals) are intelligent.
True they might not be as intelligent as most humans, but
a dog can become a seeing eye dog, which is something some people can't
be taught to do.
3. Bill Clinton is sometimes a huge idiot, other times a little idiot.
4. So are most other politicians.
5. Microsoft needs to do more bug testing and fixing BEFORE
releasing products.
6. The U.S. government has done some really shitty things
to its citizens.
WHAT IT HAS DONE
a. set off nukes so that the fallout was blown over certain small towns so the government could see the results.
b. set off nukes during military exercises and then made soldiers charge at, and take control of, ground zero.
c. sprayed agent orange in areas where U.S. soldiers were in Vietnam.
d. sent troops to Vietnam without fully supporting them or allowing them to do
everything they needed to do to win.
e.(more to come)
7. Working sucks. Sure it gives you money but it takes away your free time.
8. College is much better than high school.
9. Ken Starr doesn't have a clue as to what he is supposed to be investigating.
10. Bopping your bananna, and punching the clown are two funny phrases from "Law and Order".
11. The Okerlund Lombardi Hypothesis. This theory on human behavior was made by myself and a friend of mine.
All of men's actions are done to get sex. The only exception to this is
when a guy is with a fat or ugly girl, then the guy is just practicing for
when he meets a good looking girl.
12. No offense is meant to any girl who isn't really attractive.
13. English should be made the official language of the United States. This would cause all official business to be done in English
and would save money because the government wouldn't have to print government paper work in multiple languages.
There is also no reason why immigrants today can't learn English, my ancestors did when they immigrated here.
14. I'm over worked but I'm under sexed.
15. You know how everyone should be their self and try to be different from other people, and you know what this called? Well Jamestown is full of induhviduals.
16. Clinton's underworked and oversexed
17. Here's a safety tip for all you girls out there. Be careful not to cut
yourself when "mowing the grassy knoll". (I got this saying from Talk Soup)
18. According to Newsweek, the Starr report says Altoids are good
to use after giving a BJ. (Hey Lou is this why you always eat Altoids?)
19. You're not whipped if you're getting some.
By now you probably have your own opinion about me. Well in case you have a bad opinion about me, let me say
something. I'm not trying to hurt anyone with these opinions. They're meant to be taken lightly and
I'm not trying to hurt anyone's feelings with them. Please keep that in mind when you read
everything on this page. And now some more opinions.
20. The only thing worse than someone who is whipped, is someone who whips
themself.
21. Guns don't kill people, people kill people. Take away the guns and people
will just use other weapons.
22. The band Garbage kicks ass, and their concert in Cleveland on Nov 10 kicked ass.
23. Flying is the only way to travel unless you don't have enough time to get
from one plane to another or have so much time that you get bored.
24. Writing computer programs can be a long and complicated process.
25. Pushing carts at a grocery store is an easy job. It's low stress and allows
you to talk to your friends for long periods of time as long as you're caught
up and your manager never checks on you.
26. Star Wars kicks ass.
27. Star Trek is also cool.
28. If you ever call the state police because your car is broken down on the
highway and they say they can't do anything, don't say "Thanks for your fucking
help."
29. The stuff in Dilbert is a totally accurate picture of corporations.
30. Managers at minimum wage places(fast food, grocery stores, etc.) need to
figure out how to treat their employees better and stop fucking them over.
31. Speaking of getting fucked over, I really hate getting fucked over and
it seems like I've been getting fucked over a lot lately.
32.When are car companies going to make engines that are as efficient as we
have the technology to make them?
33. Congratulations Maple Grove Red Dragons on being New York State football
champions.
34. Microsoft: how many times do you want to reboot today? (this is a parody
of their 'where do you want to go today' slogan)
35. Why do fat people wear stretch pants? It makes me want to hurl.
36. Good job President Clinton on finally bombing Iraq. You should have done it
back in November.
37. I don't think bombing Iraq is a "Wag The Dog" scenario because Congress is still
going to vote on impeachment.
38. Hey Ken Starr, how's that White Water investigation going? What's that, you're
not investigating White Water like you're suposed to be.
39. If Monica had swallowed we wouldn't have this mess(pun intended).
40. If Clinton had kept his gun in it's holster, no one would have gotten shot, and
we wouldn't have this mess.
41. Rule #1 when having an affair: Don't splooge were the splooge might be found.
42. I'm glad Clinton got impeached(now lets hope he's found guilty and booted out
of office), not because he had sex, but because he lied under oath and on t.v. He
should have said that his sex life was nobody's business instead of waving his finger
and saying "I did not have sex with that woman. Miss Lewenski."
43. "Colder than a witch's titty." Where the fuck did this saying come from?
44. Fallout 2 is a great game and it certainly earned a mature rating, there's a
shit load of swearing in it.
45. This one isn't an opinion it's a fact. The following people owe me money:
Megan Benish: $9.00 for lunch and a movie
Christina Privitera: $6.00 for a movie
46. "Purple Headed Yogurt Flinger" is the funniest term I've ever heard for a penis.
I heard it from "Varsity Blues" which is actually a lot better movie than I thought
it would be. Fuck Kilmer.
47. Don't you hate it when you're going 5 miles over the speed limit on
the highway and semi's are still right on your ass.
48. Speaking of semi's, I hate driving at night with them behind me because
their head lights are higher and shine right in my eyes from my rearview
and both side mirrors.
49. Want to bypass Foolproof on a Mac? Use applescript.
50. Not that I've ever done #49.
51. I know the monetary amount of #45 isn't that much but it's the mother
fucking principle of the thing. I get fucked over, I want compensation. Is
that too much to ask for?
52. Canada is a wonderful place. Just ask Lahr, Schauman, Lombardi, and Fitz
attorneys at law. Yeah I know they're not attorneys but when you have
that many names in a row you just have to say that.
53. If the above people(#52) want their names removed email me and it will be done
54. Don't you think it's great that in our supposedly free country, with
a supposed free, capitalist, market economy the government is sueing or
allowing to be sued tobacco and gun companies. Give me a break. No one
forced people to smoke and guns don't kill people, people kill people.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Take away the guns and people
will use knives, forks, baseball bats, hammers, fists, feet, chairs, etc, etc, etc
to kill people.
55. I'm seriously starting to think that some people want America to be
communist or facist or some other totalitarian government. Supporting evidence:
the law suits above, Tops markets and Pizza Hut banning facial hair, and
the shit some law enforcement people did when they were trying to catch
some hackers. The hackers probably should have been caught(and they were) but the
cops used some illegal methods to do it.
56. Squirrel is spelled so weird. Even after looking it up in a dictionary
it still looks wrong.
57. 60 Minutes had a George Lucas interview yesterday. Episode 1 is costing
about 120 million to make and Lucas is paying for it himself. I predict
that it will pay for itself in its first week, Wed-Wed and will probably
pay for itself in the first 2-3 days. I made this prediction on 3/29/1999.
58. What's up with these stupid names for military operations. Examples
Operation Shining Hope, and Phoenix Duke.(both part of the Kosovo operation if I heard the news right)
59. Why is the IMF still giving money to Russia? Wait till they fix their
fucking problems, then maybe give them some cash. Right now it's like trying
to fill a bucket with water when the bucket has 2 or 3 holes in it that let out
the water as fast as you pour it in.
60. Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace.(this one speaks for itself)
61. Weds. May 19th. The next historically important day, that will be remembered
for decades? I think so.
62. Office 2000 will have IE 5 at its heart. Why? What does web browsing
have to do with word processing and spread sheets.
63. Star Wars sexual innuendoes: "size matters not"-yoda, R2D2's little computer
access tool that pops out and plugs into a socket(just look at it).
64. Why is Win 9x so unstable you ask? They(microshit) keep adding unnecessary things
and it has way too many lines of code. The easter eggs don't help either. The same goes for
office 97 and IE. They're all too bloated.
65. Take Linux, a lot less lines of code, same basic function, much more stable.
66. Want to be protected from the Mellisa virus? Disable macros in your office apps.
67. The Matrix- great movie, see it, see it again.
68. Need an elective at college. Take an Anthropology course.
69.
70. 69 was blank because, well it's 69. Does it really need an explanation.
71. If there's grass on the infield, play ball.
72. 3 people does not a gang bang make.
73. Episode 1 lived up to my expectations. I thought it was excellent. Fuck the damn critics.
74. Jar Jar was a little annoying though.
75. A cool HTML editor is Xsite. It lets you see the changes to your page as you edit the HTML code.
76. I'm glad Microshaft was found guilty. Although breaking it up into
multiple companies is probably worse than they already are.
77. Why do the t.v. shows that I like always get canceled.
78. Courtesy of Chris, a funny saying: "He's whiter than Greg"
79. I need to majorly update this site and finish version 3 of GEP.
80. This country can not afford to elect Gore as president. If he is elected we can kiss our freedoms and hard earned money good bye.
81. Fellow New Yorkers, vote against Hillary. She is not a New Yorker, just a bitch on a power trip. Case in point, her staff set up an interview with a radio station in Erie PA. She thought it was in Erie county NY. Real New Yorkers don't say they're from Erie county, they say they're from Buffalo.
82. The sites listed here are an easy source of spending money. easy money
83. Al Gore is a fucking idiot. Let me count the ways:
"A zebra does not change its spots."
- Al Gore - The Toronto Sun - 11-19-95
"Any government official who...lies to the United States Congress will
be fired immediately."
- Al Gore - Seattle Times - 06-29-87
"Throughout most of my life, I raised tobacco. I want you to know that
with my own hands, all of my life, I put it in the plant beds and
transferred it. I hoed it. I've sprayed it, I've chopped it, I've
shredded it, spiked it, put it in the barn and stripped it and sold
it."
- Al Gore - New York Newsday - 02-26-88
"I didn't know I was in a Buddhist temple."
Al Gore - 05-23-97
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
--Al Gore
"Democrats understand the importance of bondage between a mother and
child."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"Welcome to President Clinton, Mrs. Clinton, and my fellow
astronauts."
--Vice President Al Gore
"Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same
distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures
where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that
means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."
--Vice President Al Gore, 8/11/94
"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean
in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't
live in this century."
-- Vice President Al Gore, 9/15/95
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and
democracy - but that could change."
--Vice President Al Gore, 5/22/98
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president,
& that one word is 'to be prepared'."
--Vice President Al Gore, 12/6/93
"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
--Vice President Al Gore, 11/30/96
"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in
the future."
--Vice President Al Gore
"The future will be better tomorrow."
--Vice President Al Gore
"We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world."
--Vice President Al Gore, 9/21/97
"People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions
and have a tremendous impact on history."
--Vice President Al Gore
"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
--Vice President Al Gore to Sam Donaldson, 8/17/93
"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a
firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe."
--Vice President Al Gore
"Public speaking is very easy."
--Vice President Al Gore to reporters, 10/95
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Democrat."
--Vice President Al Gore
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the
polls."
--Vice President Al Gore
"When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in L.A.,
my answer has been direct & simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The
rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers
are to blame."
--Al Gore
"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having
it."
--Vice President Al Gore, 5/20/96
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
--Vice President Al Gore, 9/22/97
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
--Vice President Al Gore, 9/5/93
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our
children."
--Vice President Al Gore, 9/18/95
"The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Al
Gore may or may not make."
--Vice President Al Gore
"We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on
the mistakes we may or may not have made."
--Vice President Al Gore
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the
impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
--Vice President Al Gore
"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."
--Vice President Al Gore
AND, OF COURSE, (TO ALL USERS OF THE INTERNET), THE ALL TIME FAVORITE
QUOTATION OF MR. AL GORE:
"As many of you know, I was very instrumental in the founding of the
Internet"
--AL Gore to Katie Couric 3/99
And I've heard him say "When I invented the internet..." can't remember where.
84. Whoever gave Dennis Miller a job on Monday Night Football should be beaten to a bloody heap with a chair leg. He's pathetic. He's not even that funny as a comedian and his commentary sucks a cock.
85. Melissa Stark (ABC Monday Night Football on field reporter) is hot.
86. For now on when you have to go smoke say: "Gotta apply some asphalt to my lungs, be right back"
Thanks Slayer for the saying.
87. I really hate bitches who just walk in to my apartment. I was raised to knock on the door and wait to be let in. Some people are obviously too stupid though.
88. Hillary is a stupid bitch. Go run for senate some place where you have actually lived.
89. And who makes the U.S. Senate their first attempt at an elected office?
90. Hillary rips on Lazio but at least he has a record.
91. Vote Republican and keep your rights and hard earned money.
92. What does she know about education? When she and Bill were in Arkansas, it was 50th in the nation in education.
93. Way to avoid making a commitment Billary Clit-ton. Lazio offered to sign an agreement on national tv and she avoided it.
94. Windows ME. The ME stands for Monopoly Edition. If you have a network with non ME computers you have to run a special program. What about non-PC computers on the network? And Bill claims they aren't an unfair monopoly. Hey Bill, suck it!
95. Bands that have to say their name in their songs aren't worth listening to.
96. Courtesy of Coury's roommate: "procrastination is like masturbation. either way, your just screwing yourself"
97. Courtesy of Finraer: "Boredom - an excuse for much of the greatest humour of our time."
98. If I ever have a band I'm going to name it "Auto Fellatio".
99. FUCK YOU ALGORE. It's already illegal to take a gun to school. Enforce pre-existing laws you stupid, lying sack of shit.
100. "Windows is sinknig faster than the Titanic." Something I said the other day.
101. Algore, of Sore Loserman 2000, finally admitted defeat, and Bush is president. Awesome.
102. Team Fortress Classic kicks ass.
103. "This year will go down in history. For the first time, a civilized nation has full gun registration. Our streets will be safer, our police more efficient, and the world will follow our lead into the future!"----Adolph Hitler 1935
104. Need to know why gun control is bad? Look at 103.
105. Is there something wrong with the Australian boys? Cause you're scratching down under. Oh yeah, and it's not giving a good impression.
106. Duck and cover, keeps your ashes in a smaller area.
107. If you see the flash... you're about to burst into flame from the radiation.
108. I would have watched it with her but I seem to have misplaced my vagina.
JustinS - 07-29-01 10:53 AM - www.dvdtalk.com 'other' forum
109. Any government that does not trust its honest, lawabiding, taxpaying
citizens with the means of self defense is not itself worthy of trust. Laws
disarming honest citizens proclaim that the government is the master of, not
the servant of, the people!
110. "The state must declare the child to be the most precious treasure of the people. As long as the government is perceived as working for the benefit of the children, the people will happily endure almost any curtailment of
liberty and almost any deprivation."
Mein Kampf, Adolf Hitler,
Publ. Houghton Miflin, 1943, Page 403
111. "1935 will go down in history! For the first time a civilized nation has full gun registration! Our streets will be safer, our police more efficient, and the world will follow our lead into the future!" - Adolf Hitler
112. Best thread title ever: "mikehunt keeps locking up" by X
113. our flag is the visual representation of our country, and every thing America, and the Consistution stands for. All of our freedom, all of our struggles (revolution). Our very way of life
There is a star for every state, and the 13 stripes represent our beginning as 13 separate colonies
114. September 11, 2001 - never forget
115. The fuckers responsible need to pay